An Aiel Invasion

[Minuet]

Tea, yes that would be nice.

[Elgee]

*Eyes Mirsh suspiciously* ... on second thoughts, it's a bit early in the morning for tea ... I'm sure no-one will mind if I have some Kaf instead.

 

Do step this way, Wise One ... mind the icing *gives Fnorrll a very flat look, wondering whether she can force him to wear something in sheer white and serve them the tea/Kaf and cake* and of course all your fellow Wise Ones are welcome to join us.

 

*Penguin slaps Basel on her way through the icing field* ... no getting Mother drunk - my Warders will hurt you. Probably so you'll give them the location of your alcohol, but still.<br>

[Guest]

*looks at Elgee then at the Wise Ones*

Get her as drunk as you want, her bark is worse then her bite :P

 

Where did Red go?

[ineedfourberfs]

Berf woke up in the back of the Damo-van, the onslaught of primary colours and beading swaying from the roof doing more to dislodge his morning afternoon stupor than any amount of Kaf offered. He dragged himself awkwardly out of the pile of bean bags addorning the rear of the vehicle, spilling out onto the ground in an undignified heap in the process. He blinked as the sun hit his eyes, reaching into a pocket and putting on his shades. The glare now reduced, he looked around, noticing the walls lined with all manner of Aes Sedai and Warders, and thier junior counterparts. Outside the walls, seven Aiel stood about, soggy and looking a touch sheepish. Seven Aiel could only mean one thing.

 

It was the Aiel War all over again. A full fledged invasion like no other in living memory.

 

Berf hastened up to join the crowd, but got halfway up the stairs and realised he would only be bored standing up there and watching as the Aiel's pithy spears completely failed to make any impact on the Shining Walls of Tar Valon. He could endure torture and pain like no mortal man could, but boredom was just about the worst thing that he could imagine.

 

He removed his sunglasses.

 

He then donned his sunglasses. "Time to make this interesting."

 

He sprinted down the steps that lead to the gate, sliding through a doorway with a grace not natural for one whose main method of Van-exodus was tuck and roll. He sauntered up to the sorry Aiel gathering, dodging spears and, slightly bizarely, underpants. Sometimes spears wrapped in underpants. Sometimes underpants wrapped in spears, and he didn't even know how that was possible. Still, he continued. Lady's unmentionables were something of a specialty for him, and held no secrets from a dedicated pantyhound such as himself.

 

"Jesus, was that a matching set of Ritratti? When you Aiel take the fifth, you really know what to look for."

 

His unswerving and suavalicious strut soon silenced the Aiel and halted the onslaught of underpants and bladed weaponry. As one, they stared, drinking in the details of his luxurious suit and somehow perfect hair. He knew he was gorgeous. He knew they knew he was gorgeous. He knew that- no, we're not going to do that. Let it be known that everyone knew what everyone knew. He removed his sunglasses, and gave a perfectly sexy wink to the leader of the Aiel. This was a wink that registered 10/10 on the rocked-her scale, and historians later attributed it to a spate of local unexplained pregnancies. The leader fainted with a bedazzled sigh, like a sundried tomato falling through a glitter hurricane. A glitter hurricane of love.

 

Expertly, berf darted forward, catching the sparkling Edward-ian mess before her delicate uh... lived-in features could be marred by the dirt. He threw her over his shoulder, only more delicately than that sounds. Because he's smooth.

 

He removed his sunglasses, despite not having actually put them back on to begin with. "Catch me if you can, ladies."

 

With that, he bolted. A veteran pantyhound such as himself knew how to make himself sparse when stealing another's lady. It was something of a life skill, one he had mastered by the age of six. Little peices of paper floated off him as he ran, seemingly random sets of numbers collected on each one.

 

Historians would later discover that they were all fake telephone numbers.

[Millon]

*facepalms*

[Moon Sedai]

*Moon shakes her head at the prodigal Mosvani Cousin*

[Niniel]

TinaHel tried to sneak away but just when she had one foot out of the kitchen she slipped on the water filled floor. No one saw that!? Well, that warder might have seen it. To escape she threw herself on the nearest door, made a perfect somersault and locked the door behind her.

 

She looked around. It seamed to be a small library or maybe just a room of books. Hm, wonder what books they may have here? she thought. Could I be so lucky that I find a map of this place? She opened one book. It looked like children stories about some princess. She opened another one. More children stories. Was this what the brown sisters studied? She went over to another shelf. She opened another book and her eyes got wide open. This was not a book for children!

[Kathleen]

Kathleen stood calmly in the Halls of the Tower, just watching, for five pages (really????), as the inhabitants ran around like chickens with their heads cut off. Feeling a paign of disgrace at how long it is taking for the Tower to defend itself she could only shake her head in disbelief. What happened to the Warders who stand guard against just such an attack? Where is this Battle Ajah she heard about? No wonder these Aes Sedai let her people down so many years ago. How had the Aeil ever served such a people? She supposed they needed all the help they could get, that was the only explantion of why the mighty Aeil could have served such people.

 

Kathleen looked around at the chaos and spotted the Car'a'carn with the Ammy and the Keeper, and more importantly she saw the tea...where there was tea there would most likely be kaf...Kathleen knew her duty, keep the c'a'c safe, and she set off to get cozy with the Kaf...I mean Min <.<

[The_Fnorrll_Reborn]

Do step this way, Wise One ... mind the icing *gives Fnorrll a very flat look, wondering whether she can force him to wear something in sheer white and serve them the tea/Kaf and cake* and of course all your fellow Wise Ones are welcome to join us.

 

No.

[Elgee]

Do step this way, Wise One ... mind the icing *gives Fnorrll a very flat look, wondering whether she can force him to wear something in sheer white and serve them the tea/Kaf and cake* and of course all your fellow Wise Ones are welcome to join us.

 

No.

 

Bummer. Would have been really really ... uhm ...

 

Elgee fanned herself, blushing slightly, and tried to focus on the new Wise One who was also looking around her with her nose in the air and a prissy look around the mouth. Oh dear me, they really were so SERIOUS.

 

Just then, she spotted Berf/Edward/Horatio doing some weird and interesting things with sunglasses, ladies, their undergarments and combinations thereof. She didn't think the Wise Ones would approve. Briefly she thought of setting that Reeta woman on them, but really the Aiel weren't THAT bad and one wanted to observe some semblance of manners, even during a war/battle/raid or whatever this was. Besides, the Warders so seldom got to have some fun and Snarly had been growing more irritable by the day from lacking of Smiting opportunities.

 

Making a mental note to have the Yellows stand by to Heal the worst wounds and the Grays to provide the Aiel with some nice care packages, she motioned the Wise Ones to join her at one corner of the wall with a good view of the events. Please, have a ... uhm ... why don't we sit down here on the floor? So tell me, what's life like in the Aiel Waste? Ok so she was a bit lost for a neutral topic of conversation, but she gamely poured some tea for the Wise Ones (and Kaf for herself, just in case).

[Ithillian Turambar]

*after pinning the rather rubbish trainee Aiel to the ground, Ithi saw another one sneak off into the Library. Peeking through the window, she saw the Aiel seeming to struggle with all the big words in the more advanced Tomes - casting them aside one by one. Finally the black-veiled Maiden picked up a rather well thumbed book. At this distance it was hard to make out the title, but it was possibly 'The Joy of Snacks'. No doubt the Grey Ajah had left it there.

 

Ithi wondered if she should go and deal with this Aiel too, but then smiled as she remembered that the Library had its own defences*

 

 

Oooooh watch out Aiel, and remember ... DON'T CROSS THE STREAMS

 

:whoyougonnacall?:

[Vambram]

Vambram had donned his veil, and he uses his very strong skills in scouting to go along with all of the stealth training that he had received from Aiel warriors back in the Three Fold Land. He had thought that he was going to have to be extremely sneaky in order to breach the defenses of the White Tower. Instead, he saw that there was a huge water balloon fight happening that has captured everyone's attention whom were outside, or were on the Tower walls. With a surprising amount of ease, Vambram sneaks into the basement of the White Tower. Reports had indicated that there are angreals and ter'angreals stored down in the basement. He finds the storeroom, and again he is surprised to see that it is not guarded. However, common sense tells him that the aes sedai must have some sort of protection on it. Therefore, he assumes that there are wards on that locked door. Moving quieter than a church mouse could possibly hope to move, Vambram exits out of the basement and the White Tower by using the same route he had taken in order to get inside.

Once he steps outside, he sees that the water balloon fight is still going on, but with the ice water balloons also being used. There is much chaos and fun going on outside. However, he is determined to find a way into that locked storeroom so that the Aiel may reclaim at least some of what was removed from Rhuidean. Vambram's grey eyes look left to right as he searches for the closest Wise One that he can see. After he does see her, he gets her attention with a slight gesture of his right hand as he raises it up above his waist.

[Basel Gill]

*notices a shifty-looking Aiel come out of a door he likely shouldn't have had access to, and snags two water balloons... tosses one at the Aiel intruder* MOTHER! We need your attention over here!

 

*finds another Aiel in the crowd and lets the other balloon fly*

[Vambram]

Vambram sees the one tossing a water balloon at himself. The stealthy ((NOT shifty, lol)) Aiel easily dodges out of the way of that water balloon, and darts back on inside from the door whence he had exited.

[Millon]

teehehe, Millon! oh you're terrible! hahaha, stop. You know I'm supposed to be watching the ward on the vault. I still don't know HOW you can get me like this so often. *the novice giggled to the back of his ear as he nuzzled her neck*

oh come on now Sephor, you know you can't say no to me. It's my curse to be so dashingly hansom. hahaha You KNOW the vault is fiiine. Who would have the stones to.OOOOF!!

*the novice screeches and leaps to her feet slamming her shoulder into his bottom jaw and sharply biting his tongue*

 

Whad id da pwobwem wif you?! good wowd! my dongue. I dink.....I dink.. oh sweet jebus I'm bweedin!

 

*Sephor runs squeelin about 'THE WARD THE WARD' just then a sound of door opening and closing then Basel's voice "Mother! I think we need you!" and the sound of splattering water ballons.*

 

Of all the bleedin sheep gutted goat herdin light blastad bloody morons! What the hell is goin on HERE?!! Does anyone have ANY idea how long I've been tryin to get into Sephor's skir........ahemcoughcough..Good graces?! Be lucky if she even LOOKS at me after this! Somebody better tell me somethin!

 

*he heads to the vault*

[ThorkinBarrimore]

RITFL @ Millon

 

*Thor has been waiting patiently in the dark corner of the room. Poor, Mils. He was

so close this time. Millon trips over Thor's cleverly concealed fishline, bangs

his head against the wall, and is knocked out cold*

 

Whew! Now, follow the blooming girl to the vault! *Checks off of list*

[Vambram]

Vambram sees Thor following a girl to the vault. But no one except for Thor can see Vambram right now for his cadinsor enables him to blend into the darkness of the shadows down here in the basement hallway. After Thor passes right by him, Vambram remains silent but steps out of the alcove where he had been hidden in order to escape detection inside the basement. He follows Thor, while managing to allow himself to be seen in the periphal vision of this great warrior. As silent as a ghost, he walks behind Thor while also keeping an eye on behind himself so that they do not get surprised.

[bhskeeper11]

*sees many of the Aiel struggling to avoid drowning and decides it is best to bring in the ultra super secret weapon...the unknown clan*

 

Muahahaha...these silly wetlanders won't know what to do when they encounter the cute, but deadly E Wok Clan, led by their stealthy and fearless leader:

 

 

*finds the E Wok Clansmen waiting for their call in some bushes outside the Tower Gates, except for one sitting outside of an all-white van bus thingy*

 

O.O

 

One of you has defected!

 

 

That funny looking wetlander, Ed they called him...he must have gotten to you. Never fear, I will avenge you!

 

To the rest of you, fight!

 

*goes off hunting the wetlander girl with her tinker bus keys*

[Daruya]

Hey! They have Verbal! No wonder he's been missing from the Blue Ajah wing!

 

*runs forward and grabs Verb around his cute fuzzy neck* Verb! We've missed you!

 

*turns and glares at the Aiel*

 

We Blues will take our mascot back now. The nerve of you, to steal our beloved mascot! *sniffs disdainfully and stalks away, dragging Verbal with her*

[Moon Sedai]

Poor, Poor, verbal. The Aiel have taken him gai'shain.

 

It could have been worse.

 

It could've been kidnapping by the Reds.

[ThorkinBarrimore]

Walks....and stops..walks....and stops..*hear footsteps* Thor walks past a

hallway that turns off from the main path and quickly dashes around the corner

and....waits.

 

*Puts hand over Vam's mouth and pulls him into the corner and whispers* Shhh...oh, it's you! I was gonna have to drop ya. Whew! Let's follow that sweet little gal, okays? Kinda cute, huh? To the vault!

[Minuet]

This is just further proof that you are all a bunch of untrained girls and boys.

[Cainam]

*Sneaks up behind Elgee and carefully removes her wallet and sneaks back away to the Aiel.* Hehe got that wallet. The klepto has truck again.

[ed2funy]

The klepto has truck again.

 

[Elgee]

From the corner of her eye Elgee saw one of the new Initiates (dressed up like an Aiel, strangely), sneakily lift her Picture mini-Ter'Angreal from her belt. She thought of smacking his bottom, but realised that should he be able to get it to work, the ... interesting pictures of her Warder that would pop up would be enough punishment.

 

She tried to make some more one-sided conversation with the completely uncommunicative Wise Ones, but was luckily saved by the triggering of one of the Wards. She strained to hear which one it was, then gasped when the faint words started to reach her ears:

 

On a dark

Tower hallway

, cool wind in my hair

Warm smell of

honey cakes

, rising up through the air

Up ahead in the distance, I saw shimmering light

My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim

I had to stop for the night

There she stood in the doorway;

I heard the

Tower

bell

And I was thinking to myself,

'This could be Heaven or this could be

Shayol Ghul

'

Then she lit up a candle and she showed me the way

There were voices down the corridor,

I thought I heard them say...

 

Welcome to the

Dungeon Mysticania

Such a lovely place (Such a lovely place)

Such a lovely face

Plenty of room at the

Dungeon Mysticania

Any time of year (Any time of year)

You can find it here

 

Her mind is

Taint-twisted

, she got the

Ter'Angreals

She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys she calls friends

How they dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat.

Some dance to remember, some dance to forget

 

So I called up the

Sword Captain

,

'Please bring me my wine'

He said, 'We haven't had that spirit here since

DM

sixty nine'

And still those voices are calling from far away,

Wake you up in the middle of the night

Just to hear them say...

 

Welcome to the

Dungeon Mysticania

Such a lovely place (Such a lovely place)

Such a lovely face

They livin' it up at the

Dungeon Mysticania

What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise)

Bring your

Snugglebites

 

Mirrors on the ceiling,

The

Red

champagne on ice

And she said 'We are all just prisoners here, of our own device'

And in the

Mistress's Dungeons

,

They gathered for the feast

They stab it with their

Reddy Sporks

,

But they just can't kill the beast

 

Last thing I remember, I was

Running for the door

I had to find the passage back

To the place I was before

'Relax,' said the

Red Waiter

,

'We are programmed to receive.

You can check-out any time you like,

But you can never leave!'

... oh Light ... on the secret entrance to the Red Dungeons? If any of the Aiel manage to get in there, the Wise Ones will NEVER forgive us!

 

ErrrpardonmedearLadiesI'llberightback!

 

Elgee frantically rolled her eyes at Mirsh, hoping to convey that there was an ACTUAL emergency now and she was to take over making nice with the Wise Ones. She jumped up and sped off with as much dignity as she could manage, looking much like a Swan on Speed.