ANYONE WHO BRINGS ME PRETTIES WILL GET KRAK POINTS!

[Krakalakachkn]

Go crazy.

[aemonkristen]

O Exalted One, I bring before you the world's most adorable kitten that you might beat it at your leisure and flay the skin from its cute and cuddly flesh when the beatings begin to bore you. And I also present you with this state of the art video camera that you might relive the pleasure of your kitten again and again in high def frame by frame replay.

[Krakalakachkn]

O Exalted One, I bring before you the world's most adorable kitten that you might beat it at your leisure and flay the skin from its cute and cuddly flesh when the beatings begin to bore you. And I also present you with this state of the art video camera that you might relive the pleasure of your kitten again and again in high def frame by frame replay.

 

THIS IS A CONUNDRUM! KITTENS ARE THE ONE ANIMAL THIS DO VALUES AND THEREFORE THE DESTRUCTION OF SAID KITTENS IS ABOMINABLE. KITTENS ARE DEVIOUS AND PRECOCIOUS AND USE CLAWS AND BITE THINGS AND ARE OF THE DARK ONE.

 

3 points for giving me a cuddly plaything (even if it was with bad intentions) and 2 points for an awesome camera.

 

 

 

 

Aemon - 5

[Naeann]

I want a pony!!!! Oh, right, this is YOUR thread.. hmm...

 

I give you a year full of kittens in this lovely daily calendar. (don't ask me.. he's the one who loves kittys)

[Krakalakachkn]

RECYCLING IDEAS CAN SOMETIMES BE USEFUL. AS ENJOYABLE AS THIS CALENDAR IS, IT'S NOT ACTUAL KITTYS!

 

2 points.

 

 

 

Aemon - 5

Naeann - 2

[aemonkristen]

Great Lord, I bring you a brand new set of Bosch power tools including screwdrivers, impact drills and an awesome nail gun to bring your nefarious deeds into the modern era and leave those old railway stakes in the past. As a bonus surprise I present you with this 18" chainsaw, for when crucifixion just isn't enough.

[Naeann]

Hmm well then. How about...

 

I bring you this contraption which will allow you to play any game from any console/internet/etc at the push of a button without having to pay any subscription fees that particular game may have. It also has insanely fast connection so you can get the good stuff first while everyone else is still loading.

[Krakalakachkn]

Great Lord, I bring you a brand new set of Bosch power tools including screwdrivers, impact drills and an awesome nail gun to bring your nefarious deeds into the modern era and leave those old railway stakes in the past. As a bonus surprise I present you with this 18" chainsaw, for when crucifixion just isn't enough.

 

POWER TOOLS DO A MAN MAKE! I HAPPEN TO ENJOY NAIL GUNS MUCHO! 2 POINTS!

 

I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THEY MADE CHAINSAWS IN THE 18TH CENTURY! 1 MORE POINT!

 

Hmm well then. How about...

 

I bring you this contraption which will allow you to play any game from any console/internet/etc at the push of a button without having to pay any subscription fees that particular game may have. It also has insanely fast connection so you can get the good stuff first while everyone else is still loading.

 

GOOD GIFT, I WILL ENJOY THIS VERILY! 5 POINTS!

 

Aemon - 8

Naeann - 7

[Adella]

Oh great and wonderful Dark Lord, I bring you death in a box *sets down a medium sized box* What is this death in a box you may ask? Well, it's for when you want to torture people. Lull them into a false sense of complacency, and then BAM they're dead! Want to see what that "death" part of this box is?

 

 

(I'm about 98% sure this clip is PG-13...)

 

But yes, this is your gift. The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog in a box.

[Krakalakachkn]

Oh great and wonderful Dark Lord, I bring you death in a box *sets down a medium sized box* What is this death in a box you may ask? Well, it's for when you want to torture people. Lull them into a false sense of complacency, and then BAM they're dead! Want to see what that "death" part of this box is?

 

 

(I'm about 98% sure this clip is PG-13...)

 

But yes, this is your gift. The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog in a box.

 

 

O.M.G.

 

!!!

 

10 Points! 10 Points! 10 Points!

[Adella]

*wipes sweat from her brow* I am very happy you are pleased with this Great One. To compliment my last gift, and for your entertainment, I give you a boxed set of the complete works of Monty Python. And a new 72" flat screen TV (complete with Dolby Digital surround sound speakers, a blu-ray player, and a Lazy boy recliner to compliment the set).

[Kemian]

Great Dark Lord, I have brought you a few items for your pleasure.

Firstly there is a shed. yes a shed - every man needs a shed to spend some private time contemplating whatever he wants. plus its a great place to store your new power tools.

Second and third - I have also brought you a beer hat and an plethora of slaves to refil it at your whim. It may be a recycled idea but it will be highly useful for you whilst your making use of the new games console.

[LedZepMan]

hey, uh, DO, if you dont want that beer hat ill take it off your hands..........

 

 

 

And now i present to you, the most greatest gift of womankind..............

 

 

your ability to torture all of your hated male enemies by magically making all of their *women friends* completely hairy all over their bodies at your whim.

 

*Disclaimer*

 

Not for use against the one who gives you this gift.

 

Enjoy

[Aust]

Oh great one, I bring you the gift of "god-mode" for all the video games that you doth play (plus, I used "doth" in a sentence) so that you can wildly bash around the other players without so much as chipping a dark little finger nail. And if you do happen to chip a nail, I'll give you Verbal to come and bite your nail for you (the Great One does not bite his own nails... his minions do this for him) until it is smooth once again!

[mcs0083]

Oh great and mighty dark master! I bring you the bestest thing ever! It is the long lost device that allows you to be teleported to a land where there are a myriad of things to slaughter and feast upon and torture! AKA Carebear Land

[Krakalakachkn]

*wipes sweat from her brow* I am very happy you are pleased with this Great One. To compliment my last gift, and for your entertainment, I give you a boxed set of the complete works of Monty Python. And a new 72" flat screen TV (complete with Dolby Digital surround sound speakers, a blu-ray player, and a Lazy boy recliner to compliment the set).

 

I LIKE MONTY PYTHON (OBVIOUSLY) AND FLAT SCREENS MAKE IT EASIER FOR MY BAD EYESIGHT (CURSE THE MAKER!) TO SEE AND YOU OBVIOUSLY KNOW MY LOVE OF MEDIA SINCE I'M THE ENTERTAINMENT MOD, SO I SEE YOU DO YOUR HOMEWORK ALSO SINCE I'M THE DO I CAN MAKE AN INCREDIBLY ANNOYING RUN ON SENTENCE AND IT'S GRAMMATICALLY ALLOWED SUCK IT!

 

2 POINTS FOR MONTY PYTHON COMPLETE WORKS AND 3 POINTS FOR THE AWESOME ENTERTAINMENT SET.

 

Great Dark Lord, I have brought you a few items for your pleasure.

Firstly there is a shed. yes a shed - every man needs a shed to spend some private time contemplating whatever he wants. plus its a great place to store your new power tools.

Second and third - I have also brought you a beer hat and an plethora of slaves to refil it at your whim. It may be a recycled idea but it will be highly useful for you whilst your making use of the new games console.

 

I LIKE SHEDS - A WORKING MAN'S PLACE OF REST. 2 POINTS!

 

BEER HATS ARE CLASSY AND I LIKE CLASSY! 2 MORE POINTS!

 

hey, uh, DO, if you dont want that beer hat ill take it off your hands..........

 

 

 

And now i present to you, the most greatest gift of womankind..............

 

 

your ability to torture all of your hated male enemies by magically making all of their *women friends* completely hairy all over their bodies at your whim.

 

*Disclaimer*

 

Not for use against the one who gives you this gift.

 

Enjoy

 

AN ORIGINAL AND WEIRD BUT ENTERTAINING GIFT. 4 POINTS!

 

Oh great one, I bring you the gift of "god-mode" for all the video games that you doth play (plus, I used "doth" in a sentence) so that you can wildly bash around the other players without so much as chipping a dark little finger nail. And if you do happen to chip a nail, I'll give you Verbal to come and bite your nail for you (the Great One does not bite his own nails... his minions do this for him) until it is smooth once again!

 

I LIKE YOUR STYLE, ALTHOUGH WHENEVER WE PLAY MAFIA I MUST DESTROY YOU. 2 POINTS FOR UTILIZING THE WORD "DOTH" AND 3 POINTS FOR THE EWOK SLAVE AND 1 POINT FOR THE GOD MODE ATTEMPT - BUT REALIZE THAT I ALREADY AM A GOD!

 

Oh great and mighty dark master! I bring you the bestest thing ever! It is the long lost device that allows you to be teleported to a land where there are a myriad of things to slaughter and feast upon and torture! AKA Carebear Land

 

CARE BEARS ARE ANNOYING IN THEIR FUN-HAVING DEFIANCE OF MY DARK LORDINESS AND SLAUGHTER IS ALWAYS WELCOME. 3 POINTS!

 

Aemon - 8

Naeann - 7

Adella - 15

Kemian - 4

LDM - 4

Aust - 6

MCS - 3

[mcs0083]

Oh great and mighty one who is one with the darkness! I bring you these awesome gauntlets of cutting and piercing amazingness!

 

 

Which can be helpful in keeping you from doing this.

 

[Moghedian]

Oh Great DO,

I bring you earphones, that don't hurt you ears, don't look weird, have amazing sound quality AND block out all outside noise!!!

 

*Worship*

[mcs0083]

Great and mighty DO I bring you the most amazing thing ever for your enjoyment! Behold....THE TECHNO JEEP!

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFybwg4wadI

[Krakalakachkn]

Oh great and mighty one who is one with the darkness! I bring you these awesome gauntlets of cutting and piercing amazingness!

 

 

Which can be helpful in keeping you from doing this.

 

 

I LIKE PAIN! 2 POINTS!

 

 

Oh Great DO,

I bring you earphones, that don't hurt you ears, don't look weird, have amazing sound quality AND block out all outside noise!!!

 

*Worship*

 

THIS IS A GREAT GIFT AS MY CURRENT HEADPHONES HURT MY EARS AND DON'T BLOCK OUT OUTSIDE NOISE. 4 POINTS!

 

Great and mighty DO I bring you the most amazing thing ever for your enjoyment! Behold....THE TECHNO JEEP!

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFybwg4wadI

 

WHAT THE WHA???? INGENUITY, I LIKE THAT. TAKE THESE 3 POINTS FOR THIS OFFERING!

 

 

 

Aemon - 8

Naeann - 7

Adella - 15

Kemian - 4

LDM - 4

Aust - 6

MCS - 8

Mogy - 4

[Aust]

Hey there Great One, I was out shopping and picked you up a personal assistant! She is a former Victoria's Secret model, wears a bathing suit made out of diamonds and gauze, and really knows how to crack a whip. Oh, she doesn't do any paperwork and can't carry a smart phone or anything (where would she put it??) but she certainly looks... efficient. Enjoy.

[Adella]

*eyes Aust's gift* Hmm.. Now, I can't really think of something to top that. However, I can think of gifts to compliment it. Chocolate syrup, whipped cream, various fruits, fuzzy handcuffs, tight leather outfits, your own personal whip kit, and a sound-proof room *innocent look* Enjoy!

[Amadine]

Oh dark and schmexy Great Lord... i bring you the body of Thorkin from over in this thread http://www.dragonmount.com/forums/topic/53781-amalovely/page__gopid__1682320 where he dared to sully your position with his pleas of worship *grovels*

[ThorkinBarrimore]

*Springs to life and lands with a bow before the Great and Power Krak*

 

I was merely sleeping, Great Lord. I am alive and I've brought someone

with me...a sacriface lovely maid to attend you.

 

[Krakalakachkn]

Hey there Great One, I was out shopping and picked you up a personal assistant! She is a former Victoria's Secret model, wears a bathing suit made out of diamonds and gauze, and really knows how to crack a whip. Oh, she doesn't do any paperwork and can't carry a smart phone or anything (where would she put it??) but she certainly looks... efficient. Enjoy.

 

I LIKE MODELS, BUT I DON'T LIKE WHIPS..UNLESS IT'S INDIANA JONES! 3 Points

 

*eyes Aust's gift* Hmm.. Now, I can't really think of something to top that. However, I can think of gifts to compliment it. Chocolate syrup, whipped cream, various fruits, fuzzy handcuffs, tight leather outfits, your own personal whip kit, and a sound-proof room *innocent look* Enjoy!

 

HMMM...POSSIBLITIES! 4 points

 

Oh dark and schmexy Great Lord... i bring you the body of Thorkin from over in this thread http://www.dragonmount.com/forums/topic/53781-amalovely/page__gopid__1682320 where he dared to sully your position with his pleas of worship *grovels*

 

TURNING TRAITOR ON YOUR FRIENDS EH? I LIKE YOUR STYLE! 4 points.

 

*Springs to life and lands with a bow before the Great and Power Krak*

 

I was merely sleeping, Great Lord. I am alive and I've brought someone

with me...a sacriface lovely maid to attend you.

 

 

YOU CAME WITHOUT ME SUMMONING YOU, GOOD! THAT SAVES ME SOME TIME. HOWEVER NICE YOUR GIFT MAY BE, YOU STILL BLASPHEMED ME AND THAT CANNOT BE FORGIVEN!

 

*DESTROYS THORKIN*

 

2 points

 

 

Aemon - 8

Naeann - 7

Adella - 19

Kemian - 4

LDM - 4

Aust - 9

MCS - 8

Moggy - 4

Amadine - 4

Thorkin - 2