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Ask Narg, Narg answer


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Narg know all, Narg see all, Narg smell all. Butt mostly. Ask Narg and Narg answer. No about Bieber. Narg not want talk about blasphemy. Narg also not talk of Twilight movies. Narg have standards. Many not. But some.


If wife fuss Narg ask and Narg help. Narg have four wives. Narg know how to make wife not gnaw your flesh in sleep.


If have spawn problem, ask Narg. Narg point and mock for having spawn. Narg not spawn because Narg be smart. Spawns make noise and poop. Many poop.


Narg help or mock. But Narg listen. If Narg snore when talk you, more talk, Narg awake and making battle sound. If female make same sound, run.

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You know, Narg, that's a good place for all the ones that don't work out. I'll send them to you. 


Narg drooling a bit already.



Dear Narg,


i am thinking about starting a cookpot and wondering what the best stock to use with stewing up a lightful is.


Lightful meat very delicate.  Narg keep it simple with chicken stock.  Veal if feeling adventurous.



Narg, why do guys think it's okay to start a conversation with "You're beautiful" and expect me to instantly be with them? 


Guys who do this not very smart.  Not much practice being around human females or being smart Narg think.  Would be like Narg starting conversation with human with "You look tasty."  True fact but not subtle or clever.  Creepy too.  Narg smarter than that.

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Narg, do Trollocs play any games to have fun?

Most Trollocs dumb, not smart like Narg. Trollocs fight other Trollocs. Sometimes fun if win, sometimes not fun if lose.


Dear Narg, 


should I move in with my bf or not?

Narg no sure. What bf do for you? Does bf cook? Does bf clean? If no, bf move into Narg's cookpot. Narg hungry and have new recipe for bf stew.




How do I talk to women?

Narg say open mouth, make words. Make sure make sentence and not make female think you dumb.

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Narg, which book should I read next?


Narg recommend Genji Monogatari.  Oldie but goodie.



Dear Narg, what should i drink ? beer or tequila ?


Human can't hold liquor so if thirsty drink beer.  If don't mind getting racy tattoo and not remembering, drink tequila.

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Vote Lily


Lily is obviously mafia. I mean she's the DO and if that wasn't grounds enough for her shady behavior. She's asking others and that looks like she's trying to shrug the blame for her future actions.

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