Elayne and Rand...?

[fuzz1717]

I recently finished my reread of the first bit of WOT (up through Winter's Heart) and I realized something rather strange about Elayne and Rand's relationship, other than the fact that there are three girls lined up for Rand.

 

If we look at Elayne's timeline (I just used Encyclopedia WOT), the first time Elayne and Rand meet is when he falls into the garden during TEOTW Ch 39, 40. That encounter is not only extremely awkward, rightly so i suppose, but lasts no longer than say 2 hours, 3 tops. The two have no further encounters, though both think of each other a bit during TGH. The only possible encounter was after Falme, when Rand was unconscious and Elayne was drawn to him. Regardless, though, Elayne and Egwene left for Tar Valon before Rand wakes up.

 

The next time we see them together is in the Stone of Tear, where Egwene and Elayne try to teach Rand to channel (TSR 7). Egwene at this point renounces her love for Rand, and Elayne and Rand talk about their feelings for each other and stuff, and miraculously end up kissing. It seems rather strange that two people who have known each other for at this point a few days at best would suddenly declare their "fondness" for each other, but love at first sight etc etc. I get it.

 

Now, after spending 4 days together, Rand and Elayne separate for several months. In the meanwhile, Rand has picked up another chick (Avi), and although Avi constantly reminds Rand that Elayne is the one for him, there seems to be minimal contact between Rand and Elayne (the only thing i can think of is Egwene conveying messages through TAR). Furthermore, Avi and Rand... well... i'm sure we all remember TFoH Ch 31 (Far Snows).

 

Now fast-foreward a couple books. Rand and Elayne have had no contact (at least on the personal level), and Rand makes an effort to avoid Elayne even though he could have easily made a gateway to talk to her (or escort her to Camelyn). Now, all of a sudden, in WH Ch 12, Elayne, Min, and Avi have bonded Rand, professed their love for him, and Elayne and Rand do it.

 

Maybe this is just me, but doesn't it seem strange that Rand, who grew up in the Two Rivers, with its strict Women's Circle and such, would be willing to have sex with someone he knew for maybe 10 days (or at least was in the company of for 10 days)? Compound this with the fact that Rand wanted Avi to marry him after they had sex, and it just seems that Rand's characterization should have been at least uncomfortable with his relationship with Elayne. I can sort of understand Rand and Avi's relationship, and maybe Rand and Min's, but this one seems really strange. Idk, i just sort of feel that the whole Rand/Elayne thing was really unrealistic, but who knows, maybe i'm missing something.

 

Whew, long first post. Maybe i should have used this time 2 write my college essays.... oops

[bcspeer]

well we know that Elayne was destined to fall in love with Rand and she had no control over it and maybe Rand had no control of it either. The whole Two Rivers gang fell in love with people who were useful politically (Perrin with a Saldean Lady and second in line for the throne, Mat with the Seanchan empress, Nynaeve with the King of Malkier, Egwene with the First Prince of the Sword of Andor, and Rand with the Queen of Andor and Cairhen, an Aiel Wise One, and Min who isn't politically useful). Maybe the Creator forced Rand and Elayne to fall in love quickly so Andor and Cairhein could be combined and both would follow the Dragon.

[Maleshub]

Of Rand's three women, Elayne's love is the least "logical" due to the time and class differences. But then again, Elayne is described as impulsive. And if we try and analyze her childhood, we can see a women who has had a very sheltered upbringing, probably never met young men whom she viewed romantically, maybe because of how many people were sheltering and tutoring her. Her emotional growth may have been a bit ignored; and she falls in love with the first man she sees as he happens to be tall, handsome, and ta'veren.

[driedraspberry]

Of Rand's three women, Elayne's love is the least "logical" due to the time and class differences. But then again, Elayne is described as impulsive. And if we try and analyze her childhood, we can see a women who has had a very sheltered upbringing, probably never met young men whom she viewed romantically, maybe because of how many people were sheltering and tutoring her. Her emotional growth may have been a bit ignored; and she falls in love with the first man she sees as he happens to be tall, handsome, and ta'veren.

 

Exactly. I have no problems buying into Elayne having feelings for Rand, as quick as they developed. She has been sheltered and it's all too easy imagining she'd be infatuated with him rather easily. Add in a few steamy days in Tear and her regards, two contradicting letters included, I can definitely see a teenage girl like her would believe herself in love.

 

Rand is another story. Considering his relationships with Avi and Min and the depth of his connection with those two, I did find his sudden revelation about being in love with Elayne rang hollow. On the other hand, I think Elayne has an unconscious draw on him, being an Andoran noble woman and daughter heir. Oedipus much?

[David Selig]

Well, both of them are very young and inexperienced in relationship, so I can buy falling in love very quickly. It's their behaviour after that which is more strange to me, especially after they met in WH. They could easily meet each other regularly thanks to Travelling, but instead stay apart for 4-5 months for no reason.

[fuzz1717]

I'm not sure if we can say they are young, although inexperienced seems about right. Elayne is somewhere around 18, and Rand around 20ish, so you would think that they could at least be able to make some contact

[bcspeer]

well they are both pretty busy. Elayne was in the middle of a civil war and Rand was trying to cleanse the source, kill renegade Asha'man, deal with the Seanchan, and bring order to Arad Doman while killing 2 Forsaken in the process. Rand also wanted to keep Elayne safe. Nobody but Rand, his 3 girls, Nynaeve, Lan and Birgitte even knew he was in Andor

[driedraspberry]

In terms of romantic experience, Elayne is closer to a modern 16yo.

[Shig]

Maybe this is just me, but doesn't it seem strange that Rand, who grew up in the Two Rivers, with its strict Women's Circle and such, would be willing to have sex with someone he knew for maybe 10 days (or at least was in the company of for 10 days)? Compound this with the fact that Rand wanted Avi to marry him after they had sex, and it just seems that Rand's characterization should have been at least uncomfortable with his relationship with Elayne.

 

Maybe a part of explaining this in regards to rand could fall to desensitization. We know that at least once rand and min, for lack of a better word, 'did it' and i'm positive its safe to assume they've 'done it' more since, so when it came to elayne, he saw a woman he was in love with and figured 'Screw it'

 

and now shes pregnant...

 

So what i'm trying to say is that hes overcome the two rivers stuffiness that many of the characters have been brought up with, even though each of them are still influenced by it somewhat, best example i can think of other than nynave(sorry about the spelling) in general, is matt not being use to women hitting on him instead of the other way around. I like the way that most of the characters were so very naive and have slowly grown out of it(for the most part) was a pretty subtle expression of growth of the characters and their personalities.

[Estrella]

I often completely forgot that Elayne and Rand were "in love" for large sections of the series. (And then Elayne would come out with something like "Rand was the joy of her life" and I'd do a double take.) I kinda wish there hadn't been a romantic aspect to their relationship at all. It seemed--seems--forced and unwieldy and is quite uninteresting compared to what they could have been.

[Lisa Campbell]

Another point to consider is that when Rand went to Caemlyn and was bonded etc., he had fully accepted that he was the Dragon and that he would die in the not too distant future. It is not uncommon for soldiers to quickly enter into relationships because they want to leave something behind. Rand is the foremost soldier in the world, with all he has to endure and expects to happen, it is natural that his previous inhibitions have been eradicated, the guy deserves a bit of fun where he can get it.

 

This was explained to Moiraine by an AS in New Spring when she wondered why there were so many women and babies during a very dangerous and uncertain time.

 

Rand and Elayne were fated to fall in love, I have no issue with how quickly it happened. When I think back to my teen years, it didn't take much more than finding a guy attractive to lead to a few kisses. You got to know the guy over time and then decided if you wanted to continue the relationship. Of course things change as you mature, but I thought I was "in love" three times between 15 and 19, and was equally devastated at the end of those relationships.

[Darksmoon]

I've always found Elayne and Rand's relationship to be wierd. They really haven't spent that much time together.

 

Of course Min is mooning over Rand for much of the early part of the books and had not seen him that long either. Of course she has 'viewed' that she will fall in love with him and have to share him.

 

Rand and Avi spend night and day together for a long period of time in the Waste before anything happens there.

[Pinzarn]

Obviously, being the strongest ta'veren has a sexual appeal to it.

[Wandering Channeler]

I agree with the OP, it is definitely the farthest stretch of what a "real" relationship is. There are some good arguments here as to how it is possible for them to fall in love, but to me it was just so underdeveloped in the books that its very difficult to see as a real relationship. As stated these two characters have been very very busy, but with the option of travelling I feel like at least one or two episodes could have been put on screen to make their relationship more realistic. If you put yourself in Elayne's shoes and you are emotionally a 16 year old teenager that has fallen in love with the most powerful man in the world and you find out you have to share him with two other girls, you aren't going to try and setup some kind of way to see him? You're thinking: dang Min gets some of that whenever she wants, Avi gets to spend all sorts of time with him, and I get a total of 10 days for the entire relationship? I see almost no way any woman in this world settles for that?

 

But I'm not a female and have no illusions of knowing how they think so I could be way off base here. That is just how I feel about the situation.

[Vardar]

I thought the same thing, but chalked it up to fate. I mean Rand was having sexual dream about Elayne and Min how soon after he met them?

 

Another question I always had, How did Mat get game? His friends take him gambling, partying and getting women for granted, and think things like, That's Mat.

 

Was he laying pipe in the Two rivers like that? I mean, he's known as a lady slayer (Although all the 2 guys think the others are good with women, well does Mat ever actually think that?) So who was Mat wooing in the Two Rivers? Did he just suddenly realize he wa a Mack/

 

 

And didn't Perrin go from disliking Faile, to right after he saved her life getting in ye olde panties? (They shared rooms in the stone right)

[Lisa Campbell]

They shared rooms in the stone right

 

No they were Perrin's rooms we see, Faile was there a lot though. Axe/bubble scene, walking in on Berelain cracking onto Perrin for examples.

[Vardar]

They shared rooms in the stone right

 

No they were Perrin's rooms we see, Faile was there a lot though. Axe/bubble scene, walking in on Berelain cracking onto Perrin for examples.

 

Ahh ok. I guessed from the whole, you should have better rooms than this, that they stayed in that room together.

[nolirion]

Well the first time she saw rand it was way more eventful than you say , the fall of the tree , the bandagin , the queen meet him and Elaida foretelling , is blade master sword .

That plus is status as a more-than-fine-looking-man he was impressive and he made quite an impression on woman especially on Elayne then those feeling got foster for more than a year . When Elayne meet Rand at Falme you don't see them on top of each other , neither she or Min ,well min was on top of him at some point but it is not that big of a deal , and at the time Rand was just wounded by Ishamael and Lanfear paid her "visit" .

Then at the stone after much girly deliberation they decide to develop their relation ship into the next level .

So yeah 3 year for one kiss , that is one quick relationship they have ....

[Maleshub]

Well the first time she saw rand it was way more eventful than you say , the fall of the tree , the bandagin , the queen meet him and Elaida foretelling , is blade master sword .

That plus is status as a more-than-fine-looking-man he was impressive and he made quite an impression on woman especially on Elayne then those feeling got foster for more than a year . When Elayne meet Rand at Falme you don't see them on top of each other , neither she or Min ,well min was on top of him at some point but it is not that big of a deal , and at the time Rand was just wounded by Ishamael and Lanfear paid her "visit" .

Then at the stone after much girly deliberation they decide to develop their relation ship into the next level .

So yeah 3 year for one kiss , that is one quick relationship they have ....

 

People who knew Elayne (Gareth Bryne and Thom Merrilin) describe her as impulsive

[LoLPoR]

I always viewed Elayne as Rand's Ilyena. It's a Lews Therin thing that you find some straw haired chit(love Lanfear) to shag. It makes less sense than the other two girls but Elayne and Ilyena are kind of similar names and I just assumed it was a soulmate kind of thing. The other girls got to sneak into his heart by actually spending time with him, the silly tramps.

[Wandering Channeler]

Well the first time she saw rand it was way more eventful than you say , the fall of the tree , the bandagin , the queen meet him and Elaida foretelling , is blade master sword .

That plus is status as a more-than-fine-looking-man he was impressive and he made quite an impression on woman especially on Elayne then those feeling got foster for more than a year . When Elayne meet Rand at Falme you don't see them on top of each other , neither she or Min ,well min was on top of him at some point but it is not that big of a deal , and at the time Rand was just wounded by Ishamael and Lanfear paid her "visit" .

Then at the stone after much girly deliberation they decide to develop their relation ship into the next level .

So yeah 3 year for one kiss , that is one quick relationship they have ....

 

The sarcasm does not seem necessary. My point and I believe the OP's point was that the 3 years you are referring to equaled about 10 days of actually being around the each other. It seems difficult to me to develop a relationship by merely thinking about someone but that is just my opinion.

[dexterryu]

I know things happened quickly, but it's hard not to notice through the series that Rand has feelings for her too. Since TFoH, he'd planned on giving her Cairhein and not only because he thought that she was a good ruler.

 

Not only that, there is the whole "viewing" from Min that all four, Rand, Min, Avi, and Elayne have known about for a long time (and accept).

[Shig]

I always viewed Elayne as Rand's Ilyena. It's a Lews Therin thing

 

Elayne and Ilyena are kind of similar names

 

Wholeheartedly agree, maybe Lews Therin's part of rand's consciousness subliminally recognized the physical similarities...although that's definitely a pretty large stretch.

 

Also something im sure everyone's noticed but worth pointing out for laughs, if you swap one of the e's in elayne's name for an I then you have an anagram for IIyena

[nolirion]

Well the first time she saw rand it was way more eventful than you say , the fall of the tree , the bandagin , the queen meet him and Elaida foretelling , is blade master sword .

That plus is status as a more-than-fine-looking-man he was impressive and he made quite an impression on woman especially on Elayne then those feeling got foster for more than a year . When Elayne meet Rand at Falme you don't see them on top of each other , neither she or Min ,well min was on top of him at some point but it is not that big of a deal , and at the time Rand was just wounded by Ishamael and Lanfear paid her "visit" .

Then at the stone after much girly deliberation they decide to develop their relation ship into the next level .

So yeah 3 year for one kiss , that is one quick relationship they have ....

 

The sarcasm does not seem necessary. My point and I believe the OP's point was that the 3 years you are referring to equaled about 10 days of actually being around the each other. It seems difficult to me to develop a relationship by merely thinking about someone but that is just my opinion.

Well I agree the sarcasm was not necessarily the best way to finish my post , but I was in a hurry , and to answer the op point and yours there have been way more then 10 days spent together , and if you think of what they did during those day you are less surprised by the time it took them .

 

What I was saying is that during there adventure Rand ,or Elayne for that matter , thought about each other , Elayne spoke about him to Egwene and when they finally meet again she is a novice who helped find a way to free Egwene and He is The freaking dragon Reborn .

Despite that her feeling doesn't change , yet he took her another year or so to kiss him .

My point is that in reality when you find a woman or a man or a you woman and a young man thing either last forever between you say hi and I like you a lot or go fast it depend on the person .

You see a trick of the plot when I see only a normal relationship between two extraordinary people , who are yet plagued by many of the realistic young people relationship problem .

[Wandering Channeler]

Well the first time she saw rand it was way more eventful than you say , the fall of the tree , the bandagin , the queen meet him and Elaida foretelling , is blade master sword .

That plus is status as a more-than-fine-looking-man he was impressive and he made quite an impression on woman especially on Elayne then those feeling got foster for more than a year . When Elayne meet Rand at Falme you don't see them on top of each other , neither she or Min ,well min was on top of him at some point but it is not that big of a deal , and at the time Rand was just wounded by Ishamael and Lanfear paid her "visit" .

Then at the stone after much girly deliberation they decide to develop their relation ship into the next level .

So yeah 3 year for one kiss , that is one quick relationship they have ....

 

The sarcasm does not seem necessary. My point and I believe the OP's point was that the 3 years you are referring to equaled about 10 days of actually being around the each other. It seems difficult to me to develop a relationship by merely thinking about someone but that is just my opinion.

Well I agree the sarcasm was not necessarily the best way to finish my post , but I was in a hurry , and to answer the op point and yours there have been way more then 10 days spent together , and if you think of what they did during those day you are less surprised by the time it took them .

 

What I was saying is that during there adventure Rand ,or Elayne for that matter , thought about each other , Elayne spoke about him to Egwene and when they finally meet again she is a novice who helped find a way to free Egwene and He is The freaking dragon Reborn .

Despite that her feeling doesn't change , yet he took her another year or so to kiss him .

My point is that in reality when you find a woman or a man or a you woman and a young man thing either last forever between you say hi and I like you a lot or go fast it depend on the person .

You see a trick of the plot when I see only a normal relationship between two extraordinary people , who are yet plagued by many of the realistic young people relationship problem .

 

I see what you're saying. I think you're right that it does completely depend on the person and is possible. Every relationship develops at a different speed. My biggest grief with the situation is that we just don't see very much of a relationship developed. They have to spend time together for that to happen and we really don't ever get that.