The Trial of Kathana Travaelar

[JenniferL]

I'm not really worried about it. It doesn't seem like anyone is making a serious attempt at trying me. Trying all the liquor, yes. Trying me? Not so much.

[Ireond]

Well, apparently the entire case rests on someone who is not present..  You're not holding them hostage until this blows over, are you?

[JenniferL]

Probably not.

[Mystica]

I will get to you when i'm done glaring at Elgee, Kath. Don't ask me what I'm glaring for, because bugger if I know the meaning of that statement that has Dwyn all in giggles, but I'm sure she deserves it.

 

Although I must say.... you do seem to make some pretty daring (kinky?) statements. 'no one is trying me?' *arches eyebrows*

 

Someone go grab Kivam and drag him in here! Check all corners, peekholes, cleavages and pockets. Send a Red up to Elgee's room to check that one too. Send one of the Warders to check Van's as well.

 

Do we have some strong arms around? Take Kathana into the back room and search her for hidden attourneys and pudding.

 

*goes back to glaring at Elgee*

[Elgee]

I will get to you when i'm done glaring at Elgee, Kath. Don't ask me what I'm glaring for, because bugger if I know the meaning of that statement that has Dwyn all in giggles, but I'm sure she deserves it.

 

*Hides face in hands* ... I ain't explaining it to her ... that's a Blo ... Brown's job.

 

Ah, you do have a point there.   :)

 

He's pantsless too? I think someone's nicked the Red Ter'Angreal and has activated it upside down.

 

I'm not really worried about it. It doesn't seem like anyone is making a serious attempt at trying me. Trying all the liquor, yes. Trying me? Not so much.

 

*Raises hand* I'll try you! Can I? Can I? *Bounces*

[Mystica]

[Vanion]

*looks down*

 

....Well, I may not be wearing pants... but I am wearing a towel!

 

As for my shirt... Elgee shredded it with a knife, so I'm going shirtless today!  ;D

 

Which according to the Poll in the Best Chest competition topic over on the Aspie boards, isn't a bad thing  :D

[Elgee]

The Towel ... it must go ... *flicks open her knife and grins*

 

[Kivam]

*stumbles in, straightens clothes*

 

Ahem.  Sorry.  I was . . . otherwise detained.

 

Really? You're putting me on trial for not abusing my powers and you expect this thread to not disappear? I expected better from you.

 

Check your account.  The prosecution can prevent you from doing certain things.

 

Kathana Trevalaer, you stand accused of defeasance in the performance of the maleficent malefaction inherent in your duties as Admin of Dragonmount.  Rather than misappropriate Dragonmount's vast cash reserves (yes, people, we have those - when I became an admin and found out, I was as shocked as you.  Not to worry, those have since been drawn down . . . uh . . . by someone . . . wait, where was I?  Oh yes . . .)

 

Rather than misappropriate Dragonmount's vast cash reserves and goodwill to your own nefarious purposes, you instead chose to shephard them, acting as a faithful fiduciary and steward.  Rather than delete threads at random, as Empy and I have been doing (you don't all still buy those "board shutdown" explanations, do you?), you allowed threads to stay - even when they exposed your ineptitude!  This is intolerable; if nothing else, it sets a bad example for the rest of us, and makes us look bad in comparison.  That is rude, miserable, and unfair.

 

What say you?  And before you speak, think carefully, for I have *pauses for dramatic music . . . pauses longer . . . fumbles with tape recorder . . . ah, got it!* <music swells, crescendos> exhibits

[JenniferL]

Wait, I thought Kivam was on my side? I really should start paying attention here.

[Kivam]

Wait, I thought Kivam was on my side? I really should start paying attention here.

 

Ha!  You are surprised!  Our chief weapon is surprise . . . surprise and fear - fear and surprise.  Our two weapons are surprise and fear . . . and ruthless efficiency!  Amongst our weapons, chiefly, are surprise, fear and ruthless efficiency.  And an almost fanatical devotion to the pope! 

 

Never mind, I'll come in again!

[Ireond]

Never mind, I'll come in again!

Here we go for another long wait..

*passes out the next round*

[Kivam]

Never mind, I'll come in again!

Here we go for another long wait..

*passes out the next round*

 

Heresy!  Don't make me resort to . . .

 

 

. . . the rack!

 

OK, back to the trial.  Kathana (or Van, if he can find his pants)?  What say you?

[Ireond]

That rack doesn't scare me, I've seen better. *hushes so the defense can, well, defend*

[Kivam]

That rack doesn't scare me, I've seen better.

 

*braces for the flood of NSFW pictures*

[Barmacral]

Oh good, I'm glad you brought a rack Kivam, and I hope you brought dish towels and a wash cloth, because I sentence you to doing my dishes!

 

...

 

...

 

Wait, we're not prosecuting Kivam? Damn.

[JenniferL]

I don't do the dish thing. I have Asians for that.

[Elgee]

*Has an idea!*

 

*Huddles with her fellow judges*

 

You know we have absolute power here, right? We can prosecute anyone! ANYONE! We can keep them all here and sentence them to eternal servitude one after the other! For ever and ever and ever and ever and ...*Starts foaming at the mouth* OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!

[Dwynwen]

Kathana, Kivam is presenting the case against you.  You were supposed to choose a defense attorney, but I think everyone sort of chose Van for you, lol!  Since you've got Van...*imitates Towelie*...don't forget to bring a towel!

 

We can prosecute anyone, huh?  Hmm...maybe when we're done with Kathana, we should bring Green Shirt here.  He's cute when he squirms.

[Ireond]

I thought this trial was about her not abusing her powers, not about you guys abusing yours..

 

*shrug*

[Elgee]

Under the circumstances, Kathana will have to get herself another defence attorney.

[Kivam]

I thought this trial was about her not abusing her powers, not about you guys abusing yours..

 

*shrug*

 

Well, if they don't want to end up in the same sorry state . . .

[JenniferL]

They say that a woman who is her own lawyer has a fool for a client. Well, I AM THAT FOOL!

 

Only, you know, prettier.

[Mystica]

how unsportmanshiplike of her to deny someone the pleasure of messing up her defense.... *shakes head in dignified fashion while making a note in her little book*

[JenniferL]

Honestly, I just don't trust any of you not to make a hash of it. I've seen what you've done around here since I retired. Its like you have a check list of "Things Kathana Would Never Let Us Do" and you're trying to get as many done as possible in case I change my mind and unretire.