Green Ajah's Festival of Lights: New Year's Resolutions and Plans.

[Ryrin]

Many of us make News Year's Resolutions. I'm still thinking about mine. Do you plan to make any? Do you think beyond the goal setting stage?

 

Here are some of the most popular, year after year:

 

Drink less alcohol.

Get a better education.

Get a better job.

Lose weight/get fit.

Get out of debt.

Manage Stress.

Quit smoking.

Save Money

Take a trip.

Get organized.

 

Resolutions can include positive, self care goals as well, such as spending more time on things you love, like reading, hiking, spending time with friends, getting a monthly massage, going to a weekly movie, talking walks, playing board games with family etc.

 

Why do people fail in their New Year's Resolutions? We have to move beyond the "planning" part and set realistic and clear goals, not just check back in 12 months to see if we have done anything.

 

After first setting a long term goal, one must then break it down into smaller measurable steps. Goals need to kept specific such as numbers, reasons, people, actions, locations etc. Next they should be measurable. Does it cost money? Running a marathon? Joining a gym? Becoming more organized? How? Your goal should also be achievable within your circumstances and time limits. Your goals should be relevant to your life and must involve a commitment. Achieving goals adds to our feelings of self worth.

 

Here are two ideas:

 

1. Write your resolutions/goals down.

2. Make a template.

 

Resolution: Lose Weight. Specific: Lose 25 lbs.

 

Measurable: 25 lbs off my scale. Weekly weighing on Mondays.

Attainable: Many people have done this before.

Relevant: Improve my health.

Time: 3.5 months.

 

I'd like to discuss how you feel about New Year's Resolutions, past experiences, positive or negative feelings. I was thinking it might be fun for those that want to join in, to make at least 5 and share them here. Templates are on your own. Next year we can come back and discuss our results and experiences. If you can, it would be nice to have them posted by 12/31/12.

[Guest]

New yers resolutins not somthing my famly relly does, and I usuly dont mak goal; alwys spontanous person besids anoher year is jst nother year to me, anothr year to worshp the gods and the powers an d the earth. I guss som goal cn thnk of now is be abl to wakl adn takk again, that 2 thngs, not rely sur ho w to measur - i only notic improvmen at randm wth them, and as attinabl, jst hav to go therpay an do waht tel me besids do exervises at hous, but wher somone usuly help me to wlk who Im stayin with, I dont evr feel liek talkng so that probabl why hvant got much improvmnet there.

 

GUss anoher an be beat cancr, cn d o taht by kep goin chemo thn finaly get urgery when I cn, Im told wil probaly ned then more chemo aftre besids radiotion.See how taht go.

 

Forth one may be hav etter self-estem and no be so sad, bt lol, dont hav an idea how to  do eithre so thnk that wishful thnking.

 

Last one I thnk is mor wishfl thinkin, been thnking taht I hav healthcaer now so cuold look into facil reconstructin for lip and palat becuse haev unilaterl cleft taht nevr been corrcted, but Im thnkin I shold beat cancer 1st, then cuold look int o that if I wan, so tha t mght not be this year.

[Ryrin]

Well, those are goals that you have, you don't have to use a template, that was just a suggestion. This is what I see:

1. Religion permeated my life.  Continue.
2. Go to therapy and exercise.
3. Beat cancer.
4. Improve self esteem
5. Fix cleft palate.


Does that sound about right?

[Guest]

Look sbuot right thogh woldnt relly count religin as a goal - its my whoel lifstyle so prety much spontneous, wouldnt Know wht Id  be witout it. Was jus sayin tht each yea r to me isnt somthin teribly specil sinc usuly dont keep goals, jst anothr cycle in worshiping the gods.And dont want career in healthcaer - if I maek it thruogh this, an d after anythn to fix face if i wnt too, I imagin wuoldnt wan anthing to do wtih medicin ever again

[Wildfire Sedai]

hmmmm...my goals...

 

1. a healthier lifestyle

2. get closer to my nephew

3. get close to my nie-phew (sister is expecting again)

4. finish the course I am taking online

5. Help my friends and others who need it

[Brandie]

My new year's resolutions are:

 

1. Loose Weight

2. Buy and move into a new house

3. Quit Smoking

[Ryrin]

Look sbuot right thogh woldnt relly count religin as a goal - its my whoel lifstyle so prety much spontneous, wouldnt Know wht Id  be witout it. Was jus sayin tht each yea r to me isnt somthin teribly specil sinc usuly dont keep goals, jst anothr cycle in worshiping the gods.And dont want career in healthcaer - if I maek it thruogh this, an d after anythn to fix face if i wnt too, I imagin wuoldnt wan anthing to do wtih medicin ever again

 

Duly noted and edited!

[Ryrin]

Thank you, Wildfire and Brandie! 

 

Mine:

 

1. Improve Health (diet/exercise.)

2. Go back to work smoothly after almost 5 months off.

3. Handle stress better (yoga, therapy.)

4. Find time for myself (meditation, relaxation tapes, reading.)

5. Save money for various goals.  Vacation to Israel, buy son a car etc.

[Aiel Heart]

1. Become a more confidant driver

2. Keep my room neater

3. Keep in better touch with friends from high school

4. Call/write/visit my family more often

5. Continue to get over the depression and become a happier and better person

[Ryrin]

Thank you, Aiel! Hopefully we can all make strides towards our goals. Yours are good ones too.

[Ryrin]

Anyone else????

[nicana]

I only have one New Year's resolution and that's to quit smoking. I have tried to several times in the past and I'm hoping that this time I really do. I've been smoking for 29 years, it's about time I quit.

[Ryrin]

I only have one New Year's resolution and that's to quit smoking. I have tried to several times in the past and I'm hoping that this time I really do. I've been smoking for 29 years, it's about time I quit.

 

I know this is a hard one but you can do it!  Have you talked to your doctor about using any of the stuff they have available to help?

[Ryrin]

"We will open the book.  It's pages are blank.  We are going to put words on them ourselves.  The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day."

[Hallia]

Tomorrow I'm going to do something I really need to do: completely clean my apartment.  My resolution this year is to keep it tidy, it's always been really hard for me

 

1.Keep apartment clean

2. Get fit!

[Ryrin]

Great Hallia!  

 

I've been trying to organize the last couple of weeks.  I don't think we need all the stuff we have.  My son cleaned his room and bagged up the stuff that no longer fit him.  We took it to a thrift store and he actually found 6 great shirts, brand names, including one from the Hard Rock Cafe while we were there.  I found an oak bookshelf I've been needing for only $35.00.  We talked about not wasting, sharing and reusing.  We are also going to our local Farmer's Market each week.

[nicana]

 

I only have one New Year's resolution and that's to quit smoking. I have tried to several times in the past and I'm hoping that this time I really do. I've been smoking for 29 years, it's about time I quit.

 

I know this is a hard one but you can do it!  Have you talked to your doctor about using any of the stuff they have available to help?

 

Oh sorry Ryrin, I thought I answered you. 

 

I haven't talked to my doctor about it but the other times I tried I was doing very well. The problem was that I'm not the only smoker in the house, my hubby smokes too. We were trying to quit together and he started smoking again, which didn't help me any, so I started back also. This time I have more determination and plan on quitting even if he doesn't.

[Ryrin]

 

 

I only have one New Year's resolution and that's to quit smoking. I have tried to several times in the past and I'm hoping that this time I really do. I've been smoking for 29 years, it's about time I quit.

 

I know this is a hard one but you can do it!  Have you talked to your doctor about using any of the stuff they have available to help?

 

Oh sorry Ryrin, I thought I answered you. 

 

I haven't talked to my doctor about it but the other times I tried I was doing very well. The problem was that I'm not the only smoker in the house, my hubby smokes too. We were trying to quit together and he started smoking again, which didn't help me any, so I started back also. This time I have more determination and plan on quitting even if he doesn't.

 

Good for you!  We can only control ourselves and who knows, maybe if you kick it, your husband will too.

[Masema]

I don't make new years resolutions anymore. I've found it to be depressing. I never follow through with them personally, so it's false hope for me. I do however have "progress goals" for the year as a whole. I look at it that way now and I tend to get more accomplished. I don't say "I'm starting this now," I have a goal for a project, and where I want to be at the end of the year. 

 

#1. Recently I dropped school and one of my jobs and decided to build my own business. It's internet marketing so it's a pretty secure field to be in. My goal for this is to be financially secure by years end.

#2. I'm currently on 10,000 words on my book and I want to reach at least 100,000 by years end. 

#3. I want to read twice as many books as I did last year. 

#4. I want to have all of my debt payed off by years end. 

[Ryrin]

Masema, I think you have some interesting goals.  Also, "progress" is a great way to phrase it.  I'd like to do that too.  Thank you for sharing them.

[Ryrin]

"Year's end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us."

[Wren of the Brown]

Hmm.

 

1.) Better job

2.) Finish school

3.) Take up running again

4.) Go hiking at least once a month

5.) Sell moar nutmeg (this is a catch-all for the niche things I want to accomplish this year but aren't important enough to list as resolutions.)

[Millon]

Something I have reas recently has changed my ideas and confidence in New Year resolutions. In regards to stopping a negative behavior. Say smoking or chewing your nails or what have you. Wait no, not read, saw on the TV. Dr, Phil. He had a guest on, Dr. Markman, who spoke of a book he wrote called "Smart Thinking". With nervous habbits like tha nail biting and habits like smoking is that you make it harder on yourself to just stop a habit. Instead, he mentions replacing. First off, keep a log of your negative trait for about a month. What triggers your negative habit? Where are you when it happens? time. Also, if it's a thing you do with out even realizing it to include peopel around you to help. Have a boy friend/girlfriend hold your hand when they see you reaching for whatever it is. Once you have a record you can see the things that trigger your habit better and understand. Then, with this information, find something that will replace the engative tendency. I will use the same example they did of nail biting. Pick up a new habit that will prevent you fgrom doing the old. For the nail biting they said to take up knitting or crocheting. Can't bite your nails when you needles in your hands. They say this is more effective than just stopping a negative habit because habits are needful things for our health. We form habits to reduce senses of anxiety, stress, discomfort. If you just STOP a habit, regardless of how negative, all you are doing is heightening your anxiety because you're body/psychy is missing out on a comfort.

 

Another thing i was told was to not choose so many goals at once because you can get burned out very easily. I have two goals. I need to lose 35 pounds and I need to purchase my CPAP machine. My first two goals would have o be that.

 

1. Lose 35 pounds

2. Save money for:

Cpap machine

3. for a car

4. for a ring for my GF so we can get married in Vegas by Dwayne Newton

5. for a trip to Vegas

 

So, really only two goals. Weight and money. Both of which are very measurable.

[Ryrin]

Hiarthbeorm,

 

I love hiking.  

 

Millon,

 

Good ideas.  I've used the term "replacement behaviors."  Teaching replacement behaviors is often used with people who have special needs/challenges (who I work with) but can apply to all of us.

 

My husband uses a Cpap.  Have you thought of looking at Ebay?  I got a nebulizer there once.

[Millon]

No I haven't honestly. I didn't think they would be available like that honestly. I will definitely look into now though.