Azrael's Tech Support Saga

[Canukistani]

Me: "Thank you for choosing Shaw, Charles speaking, How can we help you?"

Him: "My cable doesn't work."

Me: "What exactly is going on there with the cablevision?"

Him: "It's badly scrambled on channel 19."

Me: "Channel 19 only?  Or is it affecting other channels?"

Him: "What?  You want me to, like, scroll through the channels and see if other channels are affected?"

Me: "Well, that IS an option.  I was more or less wondering if you'd noticed it on other channels while watching TV.  Or do you only watch channel 19?"

Him: "I... I don't really watch TV.  My wife does."

Me: "Ok.  Has SHE mentioned other channels affected?  Or does she only talk about channel 19 being affected."

Him: "I don't know.  I try not to listen to her when she talks."

Me: "Ok.  Well... let's have a look at some of the other channels then."

Him: *click,click,click* "Ok, it looks like it's happening on channel 16 as well."

Me: "Ok, I think maybe we should book a Service call, and have a tech come out and investigate the line.  See if anything has broken to cause this."

Him: "Oh, uh... nothing's changed since we moved in.  The TV has always been like this."

Me: ... "O...K.  So... now it's time to fix it?"

Him: "I don't care if it gets fixed or not.  Send the guy whenever."

Me: "Sure.  Looks like we can send him on the 17th, 2 weeks from today."

Him: "2 WEEKS!!!  How can that even be considered SERVICE?"

Me: "Well sir, had you called us with this issue 2 weeks ago, we could have probably fixed it the next day.  Now, however, we are at the busiest part of our year.  back to school.  Every university and college is now being flooded with students all requesting internet services to be installed.  this MASSIVE influx of students has taxed our ability to see to other services.  As soon as all the installations are complete, we should be able to get things back to a more normal service schedule of having to wait a day or two for resolution."

Him: "What am I supposed to do in the mean time?"

Me: "Well, we can always have a look at the cable vision cable."

Him: "Will I have to do anything?"

Me: "Yup."

Him: "I'll wait for the tech."  *click*

 

[Talya]

Him: "I don't know.  I try not to listen to her when she talks."

 

:D Classic!

 

Of course he will have to listen to his wife for two weeks now that she hasn't got TV to watch, maybe he should have got off his backside and do something, gets what he deserves, lol

[el Nynaeve]

This entire thread, while hilarious, is the whole reason why I refuse to work on an IT helpdesk. :P

[bad company]

And abusive customers when someone screws up

[Canukistani]

Me: "Thank you for choosing Shaw, how can we help you today?"

Her: "I don't have any TV service right now."

Me: "Ok, well, what do you see on your TV screen right now?"

Her: "Just fuzz."

Me: "Ok, what lights are on on your cable box?"

Her: "My Power light is solid and my DS light is flashing.  So is my orange battery light."

Me: "Ok.  That sounds like your Telephone Terminal.  We need to find your Cable terminal."

Her: "Oh?  That's not for the TV?"

Me: "Nope.  The Cable Box is going to be like that Phone one, but a little bit smaller."

Her: "Oh!  I know where that one is!  It's right over here!  It has 4 green lights on it and a flashing orange light."

Me: "Does the flashing orange light say 'PC Activity' on it?"

Her: "Yes!  It does!"

Me: "Yeah... that's for your computer.  We need to find the other Motorolla box."

Her: "Other box?  Where would it be?"

Me: "Probably near the TV."

Her: "The only one I have is my message machine."

Me: "Is it a Motorolla 'message machine' Ma'am?"

Her: "Yes, it is."

Me: "I'm thinking that's our culprit.  Let's go over and turn it on."

Her: "Ok, there's another light on it now, but my TV is still black."

Me: "Ok, we're getting close now.  Let's turn the TV on.  Press the power button on the front of the TV please."

Her: "Ok, oh... there's just Fuzz again."

Me: "Alright.  We're in the home stretch now.  Can you change the channle on the TV to channel 3 please?"

Her: "Oh.  Oh!  I see something!  It's working now!  What happened?"

Me: "Well, the TV got changed to the wrong channel, and the cable box got turned off."

Her: "I'm not very technologically minded."

Me: "Well, it's working now.  Thank you for choosing Shaw, have a nice night."

 

[Alaksuleiel]

Elli: that's why  i left the cable company call centre I was in lol

[el Nynaeve]

Lol. I don't work in a call centre, but it doesn't stop me getting calls from one very stupid calls from my mother-in-law. And I always give the same answer: 'Have you tried rebooting it? No? Well reboot it then.' It always fixes the problem.

 

Worst was when she got a virus that wiped half the system registry. Turns out she downloaded something so I reconfigured her machine and denied her all admin access. ;D

[bad company]

I love the IT crowds way of fixing things, did you turn it on and off, is it plugged in ;D

[el Nynaeve]

Lol, love IT crowd... 'um the button turns it on. Yeah you do know how a button works don't you?' :D

[bad company]

And they get an answering machine to do it for some of the episodes

[Talya]

I work in IT at the moment, go to a call where someone can't turn on their workstation...

 

Yes, the plug wasnt in the socket...HELLO!!!!

 

so it happens quite a lot!!

[el Nynaeve]

::)

 

I had someone ask me once 'how do I search for a file?'

 

'The search button in the bottom corner.' Duh!!!

[bad company]

Have you gotten anyone asking how you turn on the computer

[Talya]

Oh they ask about how to search for files, but we have that switched off so they can't...Muwhahahahahahaha! (okay, we haven't but the powers that be have ::) )

[Jelly]

Why? ???

[el Nynaeve]

Have you gotten anyone asking how you turn on the computer

 

Yes. *facepalm*

[Talya]

Why? ???

 

To be honest I don't know. It would make things easy, but this is the MoD *shrugs!*

[Canukistani]

well, you guys asked for it...

 

Me: "Thank you for choosing Shaw, how can we help you?"

Her: "I turned off my TV, and now I can't get the d@mned thing to turn back on!"

Me: "Ok.  Could you press the power button on the front of the TV please?"

Her: *sigh*  "Fine.  I don't know what that'll prove but I'll do it."

*phone bangs down on table*

*music comes on in background*

Her: "It's working!  What did you do?"

Me: "You turned it on."

Her: "That... that was it?  It was just turned off?  How did you know what to do?"

Me: "Well, you told me all the info I needed.  It all started when you turned it off.  Made sense to start with turning it back on."

Her: "Well I'll be d@mned!  At least I know for next time!"

Me: "Thank you for choosing Shaw."

[Talya]

:o Can you believe some people....sheesh!!!!!!!!!!!

[el Nynaeve]

Nice. ::)

 

I haven't had anyone do that to me.....yet. :P

[bad company]

Yet

[el Nynaeve]

I'm waiting for it. It will come one day and I have a pretty good idea of who it will come from too.

[bad company]

Family?

[el Nynaeve]

You could say that.

[bad company]

Grand parents?