I Need Ideas for Points to Argue Against for the Bid

[Dwynwen]

It's been hard to find enough points to argue against illogically.  Could you guys please give me some statements to argue against?  I've only done so in two threads so far, and I don't want to let Barmy down.

 

Also, please don't put any political or religious statements.  I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings by writing what I know to be an exaggerated, illogical argument only to find that it matches someone's line of thinking.  :-X

[Vemynal]

Pie is made of win

[Barmacral]

[Ludmian]

Earth is the centre of the Solar system.

 

Eating at McDonalds is beneficial for your health.

 

Jennifer Lopez is part of an alien plot to conquer the Earth and enslave all the people.

[Besolyn]

Jennifer Lopez is part of an alien plot to conquer the Earth and enslave all the people.

I  thought she was also Alien Elvis' daughter  :-\

[Ireond]

 

  Postulation:  Balance within a system is required for the system to be maintained.

  Postulation:  Any system that cannot be maintained will be destroyed by external or

              internal forces exerted on the system itself.

  Conclusion:  Any system that cannot be balanced is fated to be destroyed

 

  Postulation: Pie is made of Win

  Postulation: America is made of Win

  Conclusion:  American Pie is made of Super win

[Besolyn]

Your conclusion is faulty. Based on the stated evidence the correct answer would have been: American Pie is a Win-Win situation. ;)

[Ireond]

Bah, you're not the one supposed to be arguing these

 

[Zardi]

• Logic is illogical and/or irrelevant.
  
• True implies false is true.
  
• The Earth is flat (ok, some people still believe this, but not many...)
  
• There is a world-wide conspiracy to make people believe chicken is "white" meat. It's actually green.
  
• Take an opinion on something superficial to avoid offending people (i.e. chocolate is tasty) and try to prove it wrong.
  
• Choose a WT member who is willing to play along, and try to prove that anything and everything is their fault.
  
• Correlation implies causation (either in general or a specific instance). For example: since there are fewer female scientists than male scientists, women must be worse in science than men. If you're afraid of offending people, you could always put a little disclaimer at the beginning, or pick more superficial issues.
  

[Besolyn]

I think Zardi is right about the disclaimer  :)

 

 

1 - Time travel is/not possible (subtopic: the different paradoxes offered were it possible)

 

2 - Sugar ~vs~ substitutes ~vs~ derivatives

 

 

[Dwynwen]

Ooh, lots of great ideas!  I'll start with a couple, then do some more on the other days of the bid.

 

Disclaimer 1:  If I tease anyone, it's only because I know that you handle teasing well and will realize it's only meant in jest.

Disclaimer 2:  If, at any time during my bid, I accidentally offend you, please know that I did not intend to do so.  I am doing my best to choose more superficial topics, but if I inadvertently insult your beliefs, please understand that I am only acting strange because of the bid and am not making any official statements of belief or truth.

 

1.)  "Pie is made of win"

 

    --Pie is made of lose.  There are other things with similar names that are cooler, so pie loses.  For instance, pi the number is impressively long, so many people can't memorize it, and it's used in math problems, which many people can't do well.  Anyone can eat food, so pie isn't as impressive.  Also, Pi is the name of Yveva and Empy's cat.  Pi the cat is one of the cutest creatures you'll ever see, and she is good company.  Pie the food is not good company.  It barely sticks around before someone will eat it all, so it might last a few days to a week.  A cat will usually keep you company for years upon years.  Also, after watching American Pie, one can see that unusual, non-PG-13 things can wind up in pie.  Who would want to eat pie after watching that?  Finally, since Vemy is the one who suggested pie was made of win, and everyone knows Vemy is a little strange, why would anyone want to believe him?

 

2.)  "Jennifer Lopez is part of an alien plot to conquer the Earth and enslave all the people."  (This one is crazy enough that I'll argue for it.)

 

    --It's obvious aliens have been among us.  Several people claim to have seen either aliens or UFOs in their hometowns.  Since a lot of people say they have seen these things, they must be right.  It's not like it's just one hallucinating person in the wilderness here, it's whole groups of people!

      Since we've established that aliens have been to Earth, we must ask ourselves why.  Because the media usually depicts aliens as malicious creatues who are out to either probe, kill, or destroy humanity, we must assume that is the true nature of aliens.  A good tactic for this is to try and blend in, only to surprise us at an inopportune time.  The aliens thought that if they chose a disguise who could become a celebrity, they might gain more influence.  Jennifer Lopez was their choice, but those aliens don't know that I've seen through their plot.

      First of all, take the size of her butt.  Don't you think it's a little weird that J-Lo is otherwise skinny but still has a famously curvy butt?  Aliens are known for probing, so maybe the aliens have a distorted view of how a human should look.  Humans usually have swollen or sore butts after a probing, so maybe the aliens thought the swollen butt look was "in".  Also, maybe the aliens needed room to hide recording devices and weapons.  Where better to hide them than under the butt cheeks, in place of muscle and fat?  So many Americans have big butts that no one would get suspicious.

      Many celebrities, after being successful in one field (e.g. acting), try their hands at other things like dancing, singing, or fashion designing.  They usually suck at these other endeavors and go back to their original talents.  J-Lo was originally a dancer, but has had even greater success as a singer and actress.  She's also finished a triathalon and designed clothing.  While she may not be as good in these various endeavors as many others, she still is better than other celebrities who try to branch out into other areas.  She's a little too good, I think.  She has to be an alien.

      The aliens aren't going to stop at artistic fields.  Oh, no, they're going to have her succeed in every field, from music to business to law to medicine.  The next step is the government.  Once she's infiltrated herself into every field, she'll be elected president.  She'll be so widely respected in all fields that the rest of the world will accept her as president.  At that point, the aliens will reveal their plot, take over, and enslave us.  

 

 

[Silver]

Try arguing that I'm not the centre of the Universe. The absurdity of the statement would satisfy the entire week of tasks.

[Barmacral]

[Dwynwen]

Huh?  Was that directed at me or Silver?  I could point out several fallacies in what I typed.

 

If you can't speak in words, you can tell me over PM.  :P

[Ireond]

I could point out several fallacies in what I typed.

I think you're supposed to use fallacies in order to satisfy the condition of the silliness of said bid. 

 

If you can't speak in words, you can tell me over PM.   :P

I tried Pming him yesterday, didn't work. All I received was pictures

 

 

[Barmacral]

[Ireond]

You know.. I wonder how long he could keep this up

[Kara_J]

Probably infinitely knowing barm! :P

[Barmacral]

[Dwynwen]

I think you're supposed to use fallacies in order to satisfy the condition of the silliness of said bid. 

 

I know, and I did, hence my confusion at the failure sign.  :-\  I was willing to point them all out to him to prove I was doing just fine.  :P

[Moghedian]

Point to argue against: New Zealand is not run by sheep. Even implying otherwise is pure silliness. ;)

[Dwynwen]

"New Zealand is not run by sheep. Even implying otherwise is pure silliness."

 

--New Zealand is obviously run by sheep.  First of all, I have never seen a New Zealander in person, so that means they don't exist.  That means that people like Pandy and Moghedian aren't really New Zealanders, they are just pretending to be from there to appear cool.  Also, in the Lord of the Rings movies, none of the actors appeared to be from New Zealand.  There was a whole lot of nature, but not much else.  What could thrive in such a land?  Sheep, of course.

  Because I have seen more pictures of sheep in New Zealand than I have of any other animal, that clearly means there are more sheep in New Zealand than any other animal.  Since the sheep outnumber the others, it was easy for them to conquer the others.  This is why New Zealand is run by sheep.

[Lady of the Shadows]

Well, you know what would make this the ultimate silliness?  Start arguing over why our ideas are not any good.  I'm sure there are illogical reasons for that:P

[Ireond]

I think you're supposed to use fallacies in order to satisfy the condition of the silliness of said bid. 

 

I know, and I did, hence my confusion at the failure sign.   :-\  I was willing to point them all out to him to prove I was doing just fine.   :P

Ahhhh

 

Did you just argue something with logic that wasn't faulty? *mischievious impish underhanded sneaky grin* :p

[Barmacral]

Even the anti-logic is logical. I like pie, therefore, couches are comfy.