Hey, ladies

[missinginstereo]

Im interested in hearing some opinions on Rand and the fact that he has 3 wives. Im especially interested in what some of the female members think. No doubt my fellow man would be of the "Yes! Get in there!" stance. :lol:

[Beckon]

I think the fact that Rand is rather alarmed by it himself softens it a bit.

[min]

since when is it news that men,or women for that matter,are bound to only one partner??

 

Why are so many ''unfaithful''? We only call it unfaithful because we have the ability to be ''jealous''...and that makes it hurtful..

Even if there are people out there who say they can only love one,they'll still think of sleeping with someone else sometime. Noone can deny that.

I think it's in our nature.

Why can't you love more than one? Jealousy will always be in the way;that is one emotion I could do without..

 

Sure,I think it's okay for rand to havethree wives,especially when it was foretold that he would not marry at all...so much for prophecies!

:roll:

[Safia al-Maaz]

Where was it foretold that he wouldn't marry? I don't remember that... I remember Min had a viewing that he would marry three different women, including herself. Then she met Elayne and knew she was one of the others, which is when she tells Elayne that Elayne will be sharing a man with two other women.

 

I agree with Beckon, the fact that Rand is not sure about it makes it more acceptable. And if the three don't mind (I know Min is a little iffy, but still). And it's not like having multiple wives is unheard of in today's world. If they all love and care for each other, then ok.

[Beckon]

My view is basically if they're all ok with it then...ok.

 

Oh and the viewing is that he would love 3 woman. I don't believe anything has been mentioned about Rand either marrying or not marrying.

[Luckers]

I've been in a couple of three-way relationships. Though mine were more even then Rand's seems to be. I have no problem with his though... if it works, and it makes them happy, then whats the issue?

[Toy and Minion]

I agree, whats wrong with loving three women? Plus, Elayne, Min, and Avienda don't seem to mind. They all love him enough to share him, and thats okay with me.

[Zardi]

I agree with many here. This sort of thing is up to the people involved. If they are ok with the relationship and are not being coerced into anything they don't want, then it's no one else's business.

[min]

well,not having read the whole series means I'm not that good a judge,but I do remember reading somewhere(not in the first 3 books) that it was not likely,that he would marry.

 

***possible spoiler!!!***

Egwene herself is in the beginning convinced that he will not marry her,min or anyone else. Turns out she was wrong with all three.

 

I agree with the rest here,if everybody in the relationship is cool with then there's no problem!

[Jorik Alarin]

Bah this is a pointless question....of course all the enlightened peoples will say they don't care as long as everyone is happy and blah blah blah..., rephrase it and see how their answers differ.

 

Q: How would you react if your significant other came to you and said that they were equally in love with two other people, but they still loved you too, and wanted to try and make a sexual relationship work out between the four of you?

 

Now that question has potential.

 

My answer by the way is no way, for all the reasons society gives, and for the fact that im insecure, but hey, at least im honest.

[Safia al-Maaz]

Very true. If my boyfriend ever said that to me I'd kick his ass. :roll:

[missinginstereo]

Bah this is a pointless question....of course all the enlightened peoples will say they don't care as long as everyone is happy and blah blah blah...' date=' rephrase it and see how their answers differ.

 

Q: How would you react if [b']your[/b] significant other came to you and said that they were equally in love with two other people, but they still loved you too, and wanted to try and make a sexual relationship work out between the four of you?

 

Now that question has potential.

 

My answer by the way is no way, for all the reasons society gives, and for the fact that im insecure, but hey, at least im honest.

Hey, i was tired and that's actually a far better question. I personally couldn't handle having 3 wives and i sure as hell wouldn't be up for sharing with 2 guys.

[Safia al-Maaz]

Hah. My dad says if he ever divorced my mom (which isn't going to happen), he claims he would never marr again. He says he wouldn't be stupid enough to do it twice ^^

[Loreia]

Hmm...well...as a Catholic, I do not agree with 3 wives for Rand. But its fiction, so anything can happen. I think that Rand might go mad from trying to please 3 different women though..forget the taint!

 

Loreia, the Lost One

[Luckers]

Well i dont think that thats a comprable question. He didn't go to these women, they came to him. He openly expects their hatred, it was they that set up the situation.

[Toy and Minion]

that was a better question, Jorik and if i was rand id probably say, "WTF? No! Never!"

[mègon]

Oh and the viewing is that he would love 3 woman. I don't believe anything has been mentioned about Rand either marrying or not marrying.

The viewing was that 3 women would love Rand. More specifically that Min would fall desperately in love with Rand and have to share him with three other women.

 

She specifically states on several occasions that she has no idea whether he will love her, or either of the other 2 women, in return.

 

I, myself, would never walk up to my girlfriend and say "Hey, I love some other women, and want to sleep with you all". Not only would she castrate me on the spot, but I'd probably let her do it, just for asking.

 

If I love someone, I stick to that person, and if I, for some unknown reason (say the Pattern forces it on me) fall in love, desperately, with someone else, then I'd reconsider dating the person I was currently with. What's the point of dating someone if you aren't loyal in heart and mind?

 

Now, if I happened to love 3 women and they all came to me and said "Hey, guess what? We all love you, and are going to share you." and were as set as it as those 3 were, I don't know if there is anything you could do but to accept.

 

With my personal moral values, I don't know if I'd be able to take it, but if I loved them all and they all came on to me, I, honestly, don't know if I could resist. Call it a contradiction, but you probably get what I mean.

[kait]

any absolute standing is a contradiction, because to be "absolute" means you have to ignore the other side of the equation. i think it's a worse call scenario when you only have one group going & no one is allowed out of it.

 

do not forget alannah. she is important to the dynamics of the group, too. you always need more than one "group".

 

& this ish coming from kait 8)

[Roland Deschain]

Three wives, hmm.

That would probably be good fun in the early years (If you've got the energy to handle them), but later on you'd have 3x magnified nagging and household repair.

If the last battle doesn't kill Rand, the combined effort of his wives surely will.

[Zardi]

Q: How would you react if your significant other came to you and said that they were equally in love with two other people, but they still loved you too, and wanted to try and make a sexual relationship work out between the four of you?

Luckers is right. This isn't a comparable question, because you've got the situation backwards. Rand didn't go to the three women to see if they'd be willing to share him. The women decided among themselves that they'd be willing to share Rand, and they went to him with that proposition. His options at that point were to either accept all three or reject all three.

 

Rand did say something to Min along the lines of, "I love you, but I love the other two just as much, blah blah." However, he said that because he didn't want to mislead Min, and he fully expected her disgust after that.

[Beckon]

Remember it takes Rand quite a long time to realize what he's feeling for Min. He just keeps thinking to himself how Min seems to make his problems fade, yada yada. He keeps berating himself as a lecher too, because he has real feelings for both Aviendha and Elayne.

[Safia al-Maaz]

Ok, I'm Catholic as well, and as such, in RL I don't agree with having three wives. But it's a book. So I don't really care.

 

And Rand doesn't realize he loves Avienda or Elayne until he starts talking to Min. He "thinks" he may love them, but doesn't know.

[skadi]

not sure on this (how could one be safe from having lived it...)

but : I know many many girls/women who´d say it would be a lot easier to live together with female friends than their partners, so, if those other two women happened to be my best friends and I could have them always near me and sharing the "load" of my partner :roll: :P , perhaps not a bad idea...

reverse, I myself could do with three men, but only if I didn´t have to live with them permanently :P Rand doesn´t see so very much of his 3 for the time being so I guess it´s ok for him...

[gaishain]

Well personally I could never be a polygamist, however am I against it? Not really. I mean you see these images on Tv of these polygamist communities where woman are 2nd class citizens and girls of 13 marrying 60 year old men etc which does make me sick... but that is not the type of polygamist I am talking about. I really do not care what other people do in there own how so long as it not hurting anyone, they are adults, and its consensual.

 

So yeah Rand having three women in his life does not bother me one bit. The only problem that I have with the whole situation is the unfair treatment. Rand loves all three of the women... but does he love them equally? He certainly treats them differently. Especially Min. With Elayne and Aviendha he loves them but he is willing to push them away to protect them... but he cant bring himself to do that with Min? What the hell? Plus he has been hanging around Min alone entirely too long. I think it is past time for all four of them to be alone together for more that five minutes. They all got alot to work out. Anyways. Its not the fact that Rand is a polygamist that bothers me, more of the inter-workings of his relationship.

[Iceman]

The only problem that I have with the whole situation is the unfair treatment. Rand loves all three of the women... but does he love them equally? He certainly treats them differently. Especially Min. With Elayne and Aviendha he loves them but he is willing to push them away to protect them... but he cant bring himself to do that with Min? What the hell? Plus he has been hanging around Min alone entirely too long.

 

Don't forget that Rand was prepared to send Min away. She refused to leave.

In addition, Elayne is trying to win the Lion Throne back and Aviendha is training to become a wise one. They have other more pressing issues in their lives. Min has the time and the desire to stick by Rand's side at the moment. Those are the reasons Rand and Min (and not the other two) have been together alone for so long.

 

I'm Catholic too, but I'd be Ok with this arrangment, if presented to me in the manner it was to Rand in the book. However, if Rand survives TG, I agree he's gonna realize that keeping 3 women happy is going to be tougher than facing Shaitan ever was. :D