So, I've had an epiphany!

[Xamol Na]

And you've gotta read it, haha!

 

As some of you may (or may not) know, I've been having therapy...

 

And I named my epiphany:

 

 

Full Circle

 

…so, I had a bit of an epiphany. Kinda. And it does involve quotes haha Only because they can say what I mean in such better ways.

I’ll be the first to admit that, at the end of last year, I was severly depressed, anxious, paranoid and was dragging everyone down with me. Now, I’m happy to say I’ve turned it around and feel like jotting some thoughts down.

My epiphany is going to start with a nice quote from Mean Girls:

“Calling someone else fat won’t make you any thinner, calling someone else stupid won’t make you any smarter.”

Anyway, basically, I woke up one day and decided I’M GOING TO CHANGE! Believe me, you will NEVER change until YOU decide to. You won’t hear anything anyone else is saying to you until you slap yourself and wake the hell up.

I stopped telling myself “I can’t do it! Woe is me!” You know what? I can do whatever I put my mind to and I am me! I’m not lying when I say I’ve been through some tough times but I’m in control of it now. I will say, asking for help is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. Weirdly, I actually had the song “The Writer” playing on my MP3 player seconds before I asked for help. These lyrics in particular:

But I’ve got a plan

Why don’t you be the artist; and make me out of clay?

Why don’t you be the writer and decide the words I say?

Because I’d rather pretend

I’ll still be there at the end

Only it’s too hard to ask… won’t you try to help me

(Yes, it’s Ellie Goulding, so sue me) And guess what my very messed up thoughts were? These:

“Actually, I’M the writer and I’LL decide what I say.”

And one thing I want to say is; I get criticized no end about being both a nerd and a fangirl. Guess what? I LOVE being both! The people I’ve met through being both are some of the most amazing people I’ve ever met. Also, both are GOOD things to be as they just show your enthusiasm and support for someone or something.

All besides crazy fangirls like the Directioners or the Beliebers. They scare me…

So, what I’m going to pull out of that mess of an essay up up there is some advice that I will be constantly reminding myself of:

1. HAVE NO REGRETS! What's done is done. Make a decision with confidence and stand by it. It's your life and there will always be choices to make, so take a breath and pick,

2. RISE ABOVE THINGS! Honestly, there are more important things to think about.

3. APOLOGISE, BUT ONLY ONCE! NEVER BEG! If someone can't, or won't, accept a sincere apology it 's their problem and not yours!

4. DON'T PANIC! I'm a logical thinker anyway and I very rarely panic. Getting in a panic won't help, it'll only make things worse.

5. ENJOY WHAT YOU LOVE! Whether it's being a nerd, a gamer, a writer or a Fan Girl (Greg James! <3)

6. DON'T CHANGE FOR ANYONE!

7. STEER YOUR OWN COURSE AND BURN THE MAP BEHIND YOU!

8. NEVER GIVE UP! I WILL be a manager AND a writer!

9. WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU CAN ONLY SERVE TO MAKE YOU STRONGER! So live it, learn from it and move on a fighter.

 

Another thing I did, especially as I love both writing and music, was write down something called "My Life In Lyrical Song" but I'll only share that with you if you actually want to see it =)

[Niniel]

Good advice. Great to hear that you feel better.

[ruairidh7]

I'm glad to hear that you're happy :) and that's a top post. I especially agree with enjoying what you love; too many people I know are afraid to truly express themselves, which I find saddening. Anyways, post your song! This place is so full of spam that it'll be nice to see something constructive for a change