TREMBLE BEFORE YOUR NAE'BLIS AND FEAR

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

THE TIME FOR LAZY FLATTERY IS PAST*.

 

THE CREATURES OF THE OVERWORLD CAVORT OPENLY UNDER THE SUN, MOCKING MY GREATNESS, AND IGNORING THEIR IMPENDING DOOM.

 

I SAY NO MORE.

 

WASTE NO MORE TIME BOWING AND SCRAPING BEFORE ME.

 

ARISE! GO INTO THE WORLD OF THE LIGHT FOOLS AND CRUSH THEIR WILL.

 

SO MANY EVIL CAUSES GO UNSUPPORTED, EVIL GENIUSES UNRECOGNIZED, EVIL PLANS UNFULFILLED.

 

SUPPORT! RECOGNIZE! FULFILL OUR DESTINY!

 

CHOOSE YOUR FAVORITE EVIL CAUSE AND GIVE UNTIL IT HURTS. DO BAD THINGS IN MY NAME.

 

THEN SHOW ME PICTURES, AND TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT.

 

cause i like to watch. srsly.

 

AND DON'T EVER MAKE ME USE ALL CAPS AGAIN!

 

 

*vigorous flattery is, of course, still acceptable.

 

GO NOW. AND DON'T COME BACK UNTIL THE EARTH IS RENT ASUNDER AND ALL ITS PEOPLE WAIL IN DESPAIR.

 

I HAVE SPOKEN.

[Krakalakachkn]

I tripped a blind kid today.

[Niniel]

I´m not a kid (just short) and I´m not blind. Fail!

[Moon Sedai]

Sue Sylvester has a great plan. I think I'll use it.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZTdrC_ZxfQ

 

 

[ed2funy]

Oh great Nae Blisser, I bring you my donation to Chow from Chow - Puppy Edition!!!

 

Earlier today, at a car wash fundraiser, someone left their small puppy lying around. I immediately took action!

 

Here is the puppy in it's original format:

 

 

 

 

 

Notice it's resemblance to the "fearless" Leader, Verbal?

 

 

Here is the Ewok Puppy while I prepared it.

 

 

 

 

And here is the finished meal, which I have brought to you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is the new motto I have created for my favorite Evil Charity:

 

 

 

 

^.^

[ed2funy]

Oh Great Evil Mistress, whom I dare not name by Cindy, I have been busy!

 

I have contacted the Teddy Bear Dueling company to put on a LIVE presentation just for you.

They obliged, of course, when I told them your name.

 

 

 

So, without further ado, here are the contestants to choose from:

 

 

As you can see, this slave child is using a special Sharan dance to keep the bears hypnotized.

 

 

*waits for the Evil One to choose*

 

Ah, excellent choices, Grand Kitteh Lover. The one-eye and the heavy muffin. They are crowd favorites.

 

 

 

Just look how they sway their hips and bounce their fluff. They've got so much swag, even Des can't touch em.

 

But oh god, it looks like One-Eyed Billy Bear is the first to attack. Dear god, he is vicious. Just look how he threatens Muffintop Bear so.

 

 

 

If only Lily could move like that, right? Her client list would skyrocket!

It sure looks like One-Eye is gonna be the one to win, right?

 

WAIT!!!! Muffintop just SAT on top of One-Eye. Oh Great Lord...he's tearing at his limbs. He's eating the fluff. Dear Nae'blis...oh my...he is dancing in the carcass of One-Eye!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Vambram]

ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

Now, I that I have been properly inspired, I shall return later tonight with appropriate gifts and donations which I believe that our Nae'blis Cindy shall enjoy.

[ed2funy]

Owner of the Night and Herder of the Hordes of Death, I am hurting from giving, so I shall give you something you can enjoy.

 

 

Both cat and play toy.

Of course, this is only the concept art, but I am working on the splicing as we speak!

 

 

[Niniel]

To the cutest Nae´blis ever (cute in an evil way of course) I will give this army:

 

 

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

I tripped a blind kid today.

 

 

good effort, and i can tell your heart's in the right place. 5 points.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

I´m not a kid (just short) and I´m not blind. Fail!

 

 

i'd almost give him more points for the extra effort of tripping an adult with intact senses and the ability to kick his butt...

 

but 5 points for throwing him under the bus. shows the right spirit.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

Sue Sylvester has a great plan. I think I'll use it.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZTdrC_ZxfQ

 

 

that is an excellent ebil plan.... it will hurt the humans, and provide homes for the kitty cats... who are as likely to be ebil as not...

 

5 points.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

Oh great Nae Blisser, I bring you my donation to Chow from Chow - Puppy Edition!!!

 

Earlier today, at a car wash fundraiser, someone left their small puppy lying around. I immediately took action!

 

Here is the puppy in it's original format:

 

 

 

 

 

Notice it's resemblance to the "fearless" Leader, Verbal?

 

 

Here is the Ewok Puppy while I prepared it.

 

 

 

 

And here is the finished meal, which I have brought to you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is the new motto I have created for my favorite Evil Charity:

 

 

 

 

^.^

 

 

i... um... wow... you really are marvelously Evil... and... you have a strong stomach for mayhem and cruelty... which is why i must reward you, though... puppies... still, i asked for evil, and you have provided evil of great splendor and... delicacy...

 

for your strong show of really really awful badass badness and.... puppy love... i give you, for each delightful picture... 3 points, for a total of (calculating here, bear with me, one sec) 15...

 

and for the really well worded and... again, superiorly evil, description... another 5 points...

 

for a total of (shoes off, one sec here.... ) um.... 20. 20 points.

 

 

... seriously considering making it 30 in nervous anticipation of what may follow otherwise... but too curious...

 

so 20, yes 20 for the local color... and flavor... and demonstration of true grit and a charmingly energetic willingness to do bad things for me. very bad things.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

Oh Great Evil Mistress, whom I dare not name by Cindy, I have been busy!

 

I have contacted the Teddy Bear Dueling company to put on a LIVE presentation just for you.

They obliged, of course, when I told them your name.

 

 

 

So, without further ado, here are the contestants to choose from:

 

 

As you can see, this slave child is using a special Sharan dance to keep the bears hypnotized.

 

 

*waits for the Evil One to choose*

 

Ah, excellent choices, Grand Kitteh Lover. The one-eye and the heavy muffin. They are crowd favorites.

 

 

 

Just look how they sway their hips and bounce their fluff. They've got so much swag, even Des can't touch em.

 

But oh god, it looks like One-Eyed Billy Bear is the first to attack. Dear god, he is vicious. Just look how he threatens Muffintop Bear so.

 

 

 

If only Lily could move like that, right? Her client list would skyrocket!

It sure looks like One-Eye is gonna be the one to win, right?

 

WAIT!!!! Muffintop just SAT on top of One-Eye. Oh Great Lord...he's tearing at his limbs. He's eating the fluff. Dear Nae'blis...oh my...he is dancing in the carcass of One-Eye!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

aaaawwwwwwwwwwwwww..... *ahem* i mean Bwahahahahahaha! fantastically evil!

 

and very nice flattery, it gave me happy and warm feelings instead of the depressingly icky ones i usually get from that sort of thing.

 

the joy you have provided my blackened heart and soul by so amusingly doing my bidding is incalcualble. no seriously, lotta math.

 

thankfully, there's a cap here, and i can do the basic subtraction, really, i can do this... so - 10! you get 10 more points, for a total of 30, though you certainly deserve many more.

 

go now, my beautiful, fuzzy, bad boy, and continue to destroy the souls and minds of all you touch. i will remember your great deeds when i do have more points to give, and though you are wealthy beyond all need, still, nice to have a little extra tucked away in the mattress just in case.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

Now, I that I have been properly inspired, I shall return later tonight with appropriate gifts and donations which I believe that our Nae'blis Cindy shall enjoy.

 

 

you get 5 for just showing up.

 

you make a kitteh Nae'Blis smile.

 

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

Owner of the Night and Herder of the Hordes of Death, I am hurting from giving, so I shall give you something you can enjoy.

 

 

Both cat and play toy.

Of course, this is only the concept art, but I am working on the splicing as we speak!

 

 

 

dang... i..... nice..... very nice......

 

if i could, i'd give you another 10 for the beefcake, 10 for the wonderful new title, and 10 because you told me it hurts... and i like the sound of that.

 

but alas, it's still only 30.

 

but you happify me. name a prize and i will kidnap and deliver it to you. alive if possible. unless otherwise specified. your call.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

To the cutest Nae´blis ever (cute in an evil way of course) I will give this army:

 

 

 

 

 

awwwwwwwwwww, little basement kitties.... they will be a perfect army, with the needle sharp teeth and claws and adorable hypnotic eyes of death and stuff.

 

i will pretend you didn't say the cute thing (cause, pure dark spirit here, srsly, grrrrrrrrrrrrrr....) and give you 5 points for the kitties, and 5 cause you're Tina, and a finer little hellion has never walked the earth.

 

so 10

 

(and i just realized how hard all this mafs gonna be... i may need a slave who can calculate).

[Vambram]

 

Well, I tried to post images, but dragonmout.com is telling me that I am not allowed to do that on this board. Will someone please tell me what the hell is up with that?

 

 

And it would not let me post images from my computer's Microsoft word, either. This sucks, big time because I really wanted to post some very cool evil kitteh images.

[ed2funy]

Click attach file or w/e on the full editor, below the text box and above the reply button, Vam. Then find the file you want to upload.

 

 

 

 

Evil Kitty Overlord, I can haz Lily, tied up (with clothes on!), ready to be sold to the highest bidder?

 

The funds collected, of course, would go to the Canadians for Fodder campaign.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

Click attach file or w/e on the full editor, below the text box and above the reply button, Vam. Then find the file you want to upload.

 

 

 

 

Evil Kitty Overlord, I can haz Lily, tied up (with clothes on!), ready to be sold to the highest bidder?

 

The funds collected, of course, would go to the Canadians for Fodder campaign.

 

 

... this would take some serious doing....

 

you are testing your nae'blis perhaps?

 

DO NOT TOY WITH ONE DEVOTED FROM HER CRADLE TO THE DARK, SO FAR BACK IN THE MISTS OF TIME, THE FATHER OF YOUR FATHER WAS IN HIS OWN BABY JUMPAROUND AT THE MOMENT OF HER ASCENSION TO EVIL!

 

but i'll see what i can do, cause... i made an open ended promise, and if you can't trust the heart of the dark, who can you trust, really?

[Leelou]

I bring you the

and all it's residents.

 

Here we have Ishamael

 

He's a special case...

 

Balthamel has been here for a long time and has started to waste away

 

 

Be'lal thinks very highly of himself

 

 

Graendal does not like Asmodean

 

 

Demandred is off in the corner planning, something great we hear...

 

 

Lanfear is the most beautiful, also tends to be obsessed with a man named Lews

 

 

Sammael thinks he can take on this Lews and win

 

 

Aginor likes to tinker with things, we swear one time he put the head of a grasshopper on a mouse and it still ran around...

 

 

Semirhage is just a bit mean

 

 

Moghedian lurks in the shadows

 

 

Rahvin is a ladies man

 

 

Teaching is what sent Mesaana here

 

 

Well, that seems to be all our residents, enjoy them!

[Vambram]

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

I bring you the

and all it's residents.

 

Here we have Ishamael

 

He's a special case...

 

Balthamel has been here for a long time and has started to waste away

 

 

Be'lal thinks very highly of himself

 

 

Graendal does not like Asmodean

 

 

Demandred is off in the corner planning, something great we hear...

 

 

Lanfear is the most beautiful, also tends to be obsessed with a man named Lews

 

 

Sammael thinks he can take on this Lews and win

 

 

Aginor likes to tinker with things, we swear one time he put the head of a grasshopper on a mouse and it still ran around...

 

 

Semirhage is just a bit mean

 

 

Moghedian lurks in the shadows

 

 

Rahvin is a ladies man

 

 

Teaching is what sent Mesaana here

 

 

Well, that seems to be all our residents, enjoy them!

 

 

this is a magnificent idea, and i would break down the points if it was not as late in the day and if i had a better grasp of the concept.

 

moridin kitty is of course the star of the show, and i feel sorta bad for asmodean...

 

but from my fuzzy state of mind, i can most nearly calculate .... um, lotsa evil and cute kitties x a good evil cause x the most i can give is 30, so, for your very nice evil kitty asylum complete with evil kitties, 30 points.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

 

 

ohhhhh... cutchie cutchie coo, what a sweet, dear, ebil widdle kitty cat.... is too cute, is so cute it hurts, sweet sweet pain...

 

you can has 5 more points for dis adorablz kitty, and if the rules were looser, there'd be a whole lot more.

 

but i know i can count on you to continue pleasing me with adorableness that is not cut up and cooked or grossifying in any way, and even if you can't find the time, well, you bery special to your nae'blis. we work something out.

[Vambram]

Alright, great Nae'blis Cindy, I give to you an evil kitteh soul eater whom you can send out to punish and eat the souls of all whom displease you.

 

 

 

And now all of your various condiments are organized too!! What more could you ask for?

 

 

The Soul eating evil kitteh has a partner, and that is the evil kitteh who stares down into submission those whom displeases you, great and mighty Nae'bliss Cindy.