I hear people say, "I hate myself" and I wonder about that.
Think of a terrible person that you really hate. Now suppose she wins the lottery. Are you happy for her sudden windfall? Of course not--you hate that person. Seeing them better off burns you up. Likewise, if something bad happens to them, that makes you happy (in a mean-spirited way, but happy nonetheless.)
Now imagine that the terrible person you hate is yourself, and then you win the lottery. Are you burning up with anger because you're financially free? Of course not. Suppose someone sues you for all your money--are you happy now that you might lose everything? Of course not.
It seems that our feelings about good and bad events are the opposite depending on whether the person we hate is ourselves or someone else.
It seems to me (speaking from personal experience here) is when I say, "I hate myself," what I'm really saying is things like, "I hate my circumstances," or "I hate the choices that I made to cause this pain," or "I hate that other people have hurt me." It's only because I truly do love myself that those bad scenarios cause me such distress.
You're right, Cross. We want to be loved. I think that some people, when not shown love, tell themselves, "I must be worthless."