General Questions and Possible Answers

[Red2111]

have a question that you want answered; ask it here.

 

topics rang from anything, anyone can post, anyone can ask and anyone can answer.

 

 

only rules are:

 

- remember to keep both questions and answers pg13

- this is a public board so any info posted here will be public

- this is not intended for spam, as its not in fiddles.  fun questions are fun, but spamming is considered abuse to this topic and will lead to posts being deleted and warnings.

[John E. Kelley]

What is the airspeed of an unladen African swallow?

[John E. Kelley]

Is the bird actually the word? And if so, have you heard?

[Red2111]

okay, heres a question for all you polite people.

 

i work in an office.  we get alot of members comming and going from the offic.  there is this one member that 100% urks my ever loving nerves.

 

i've nicknamed him PITA.

 

among the top of my list is

- takes candy fromt eh dish but doesnt donate to replinish the list.  not just takes candy from the dish but will root around the dish and take multiple pieces.

- will complain about the selection of candy in the dish.  and multiple "well its on donation only maybe you should put some cash in if you want a better selection" falls suprisingly on deaf ears.

- does not put back things that he gets down.  what am i your flamming mother?!  i dont even pick up after my fiancee!  ... but i digress

 

these i can ignore and let roll off.  they urk me, but not enough to get me to say soemthing.  after all, membership dews are what pays my paycheck and some peopel are just ignorant pigs.  you cant fix stupid.

all of this is to bring you to the point i need help with, that i'm litterally at my wits end with.

 

every time PITA comes in, he chews with his mouth open.   i can never catch him before he comes it, to hide the candy dish, so thats not an option. he normally sits about 10 feet from my desk, but sometimes he uses the cpu thats within slapping distance of my arm from where my desk is. as i said, membership is important, so saying "hey dip wad, mind to chew with your mouth closed so i dont hear what your digesting like a cow?" or a similar comment is out of the question.

 

i've mentioned it to my boss numerous times, upon which she just shrugs.

 

i've tried turing up my music to drown him out, i swear he chews louder.

 

i've tried headphones, but these dont work that well because i have to answer phones and quesitons.

 

i'm about to go all out argo over this.  it makes me cringe, and twitch and every time it happens my fuse gets shorter (the short fuse might have soemthign to do with wedding and college stress as well)

so tell me people.  how can i get this ape to stop chewing with his mouth full without going 3 shades fo Red Headed Bridezilla on him?

 

because stabbing him in the neck with a dull pencil and duct taping his mouth shut are not options.

 

[Red2111]

What is the airspeed of an unladen African swallow?

 

coconut.  *nods*

 

Is the bird actually the word? And if so, have you heard?

 

what?  that Bird is the word?  have you not heard?

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

What is the airspeed of an unladen African swallow?

  

Is the bird actually the word? And if so, have you heard?

oppositional defiance and boyish stubbornness.

 

you haz it.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

okay, heres a question for all you polite people.

 

i work in an office. we get alot of members comming and going from the offic. there is this one member that 100% urks my ever loving nerves.

 

i've nicknamed him PITA.

 

among the top of my list is

- takes candy fromt eh dish but doesnt donate to replinish the list. not just takes candy from the dish but will root around the dish and take multiple pieces.

- will complain about the selection of candy in the dish. and multiple "well its on donation only maybe you should put some cash in if you want a better selection" falls suprisingly on deaf ears.

- does not put back things that he gets down. what am i your flamming mother?! i dont even pick up after my fiancee! ... but i digress

 

these i can ignore and let roll off. they urk me, but not enough to get me to say soemthing. after all, membership dews are what pays my paycheck and some peopel are just ignorant pigs. you cant fix stupid.

 

all of this is to bring you to the point i need help with, that i'm litterally at my wits end with.

 

every time PITA comes in, he chews with his mouth open. i can never catch him before he comes it, to hide the candy dish, so thats not an option. he normally sits about 10 feet from my desk, but sometimes he uses the cpu thats within slapping distance of my arm from where my desk is. as i said, membership is important, so saying "hey dip wad, mind to chew with your mouth closed so i dont hear what your digesting like a cow?" or a similar comment is out of the question.

 

i've mentioned it to my boss numerous times, upon which she just shrugs.

 

i've tried turing up my music to drown him out, i swear he chews louder.

 

i've tried headphones, but these dont work that well because i have to answer phones and quesitons.

 

i'm about to go all out argo over this. it makes me cringe, and twitch and every time it happens my fuse gets shorter (the short fuse might have soemthign to do with wedding and college stress as well)

 

so tell me people. how can i get this ape to stop chewing with his mouth full without going 3 shades fo Red Headed Bridezilla on him?

 

because stabbing him in the neck with a dull pencil and duct taping his mouth shut are not options.

you are feeding a stray puppy with mange.

 

either keep the candy locked in a drawer, put the dish out of your earshot, or leave out free condoms like planned parenthood does, or something likewise more useful and less likely to be consumed in your presence.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

how do you get humans to do what you want?

 

srsly, I can get cats, dogs, and penguins to do anything... yes, penguins, I found out at the Bronx zoo it's a strange thing but I digress...

 

how do you get humans to do some silly little thing you want?

[Red2111]

Sheldon would say by bribing them and reinforcing their good behavior with small pieces of candy or things of monitary value.

 

i hear it works well with children *nods*

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

Sheldon would say by bribing them and reinforcing their good behavior with small pieces of candy or things of monitary value.

 

i hear it works well with children *nods*

I include the children with the pets, and have no difficulty controlling their behavior.

 

I think I could manage Sheldon as well.

 

the socially viable adults confound me completely.

 

perhaps I'll start a penguin army...

 

sigh.

 

thanks tho.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

how do I make time go slower?

 

aside from spending more of it at work.

 

also... backwards if possible.

[Mr Ares]

how do you get humans to do what you want?

 

srsly, I can get cats, dogs, and penguins to do anything... yes, penguins, I found out at the Bronx zoo it's a strange thing but I digress...

 

how do you get humans to do some silly little thing you want?

Well, I tend to use fear. Love also works well, but getting people to love me isn't easy (especially with the causing fear thing...). Learn how to push people's buttons, that's the most important part of interacting with other people. Once you can get them to feel the way you want them to, it's much easier to put them in a state where they are receptive to your suggestions as to what they should do. Reward good behaviour, punish bad.

[lolguy26]

okay, heres a question for all you polite people.

 

i work in an office.  we get alot of members comming and going from the offic.  there is this one member that 100% urks my ever loving nerves.

 

i've nicknamed him PITA.

 

among the top of my list is

- takes candy fromt eh dish but doesnt donate to replinish the list.  not just takes candy from the dish but will root around the dish and take multiple pieces.

- will complain about the selection of candy in the dish.  and multiple "well its on donation only maybe you should put some cash in if you want a better selection" falls suprisingly on deaf ears.

- does not put back things that he gets down.  what am i your flamming mother?!  i dont even pick up after my fiancee!  ... but i digress

 

these i can ignore and let roll off.  they urk me, but not enough to get me to say soemthing.  after all, membership dews are what pays my paycheck and some peopel are just ignorant pigs.  you cant fix stupid.

all of this is to bring you to the point i need help with, that i'm litterally at my wits end with.

 

every time PITA comes in, he chews with his mouth open.   i can never catch him before he comes it, to hide the candy dish, so thats not an option. he normally sits about 10 feet from my desk, but sometimes he uses the cpu thats within slapping distance of my arm from where my desk is. as i said, membership is important, so saying "hey dip wad, mind to chew with your mouth closed so i dont hear what your digesting like a cow?" or a similar comment is out of the question.

 

i've mentioned it to my boss numerous times, upon which she just shrugs.

 

i've tried turing up my music to drown him out, i swear he chews louder.

 

i've tried headphones, but these dont work that well because i have to answer phones and quesitons.

 

i'm about to go all out argo over this.  it makes me cringe, and twitch and every time it happens my fuse gets shorter (the short fuse might have soemthign to do with wedding and college stress as well)

so tell me people.  how can i get this ape to stop chewing with his mouth full without going 3 shades fo Red Headed Bridezilla on him?

 

because stabbing him in the neck with a dull pencil and duct taping his mouth shut are not options.

 

how about asking him to stop it in a subtle way or something?

(id recommend talking to your boss but you did it)

 

or maybe ask to move to another desk away from "PITA" ? 

[lolguy26]

So, i have an entrance exam in a week and im sorta tense, if i pass and become part of the top 200 students to get to do the next stage (interviews), so my question is, how can I

1) stop being tense or maybe a bit less nervous about it?

2) how do i prepare for a phone interview?

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

 

how do you get humans to do what you want?

srsly, I can get cats, dogs, and penguins to do anything... yes, penguins, I found out at the Bronx zoo it's a strange thing but I digress...

how do you get humans to do some silly little thing you want?

 

Well, I tend to use fear. Love also works well, but getting people to love me isn't easy (especially with the causing fear thing...). Learn how to push people's buttons, that's the most important part of interacting with other people. Once you can get them to feel the way you want them to, it's much easier to put them in a state where they are receptive to your suggestions as to what they should do. Reward good behaviour, punish bad.

I need more details regarding the use of fear.

 

I'll never learn the love thing.

 

but.... very good advice thanks.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

So, i have an entrance exam in a week and im sorta tense, if i pass and become part of the top 200 students to get to do the next stage (interviews), so my question is, how can I

1) stop being tense or maybe a bit less nervous about it?

2) how do i prepare for a phone interview?

pretend both are practice.

 

I do this with all tests and interviews, and it helps to test and interview for things you don't want just to learn that feeling.

 

google interview questions they have a limited pool of those so it helps.

 

understand they're more interested in your reaction to a question than your response, so it's better to be calm than to be right.

 

phone interview?

 

pantsless. definitely.

[Mr Ares]

 

 

how do you get humans to do what you want?

srsly, I can get cats, dogs, and penguins to do anything... yes, penguins, I found out at the Bronx zoo it's a strange thing but I digress...

how do you get humans to do some silly little thing you want?

Well, I tend to use fear. Love also works well, but getting people to love me isn't easy (especially with the causing fear thing...). Learn how to push people's buttons, that's the most important part of interacting with other people. Once you can get them to feel the way you want them to, it's much easier to put them in a state where they are receptive to your suggestions as to what they should do. Reward good behaviour, punish bad.

I need more details regarding the use of fear.

 

I'll never learn the love thing.

 

but.... very good advice thanks.

Observation is a part of it - learn what inspires a reaction, and what you need to do to provoke that reaction. Inspire feelings they would prefer to avoid, such as fear, in order to steer people. It helps to acquire a scary reputation, so be willing to do nasty things in order to leave people worried about what you might do if you're displeased. You might want to start small - giving people a nasty telling off. Physical pain is something people tend to avoid, so the implicit threat of it can help. Try and favour situations which will put you in a position of power. Undermine confidence whenever the opportunity occurs. Prey on insecurity and weakness. Make your anger something people will work to avoid, and thereby use the threat of the anger rather than the anger itself to drive people.

 

What it comes down to is this: if you do something wrong, I will do something nasty. Make people work to avoid that nastiness, and you have the essence of control.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

 

 

 

how do you get humans to do what you want?

srsly, I can get cats, dogs, and penguins to do anything... yes, penguins, I found out at the Bronx zoo it's a strange thing but I digress...

how do you get humans to do some silly little thing you want?

 

Well, I tend to use fear. Love also works well, but getting people to love me isn't easy (especially with the causing fear thing...). Learn how to push people's buttons, that's the most important part of interacting with other people. Once you can get them to feel the way you want them to, it's much easier to put them in a state where they are receptive to your suggestions as to what they should do. Reward good behaviour, punish bad.

I need more details regarding the use of fear.

I'll never learn the love thing.

but.... very good advice thanks.

Observation is a part of it - learn what inspires a reaction, and what you need to do to provoke that reaction. Inspire feelings they would prefer to avoid, such as fear, in order to steer people. It helps to acquire a scary reputation, so be willing to do nasty things in order to leave people worried about what you might do if you're displeased. You might want to start small - giving people a nasty telling off. Physical pain is something people tend to avoid, so the implicit threat of it can help. Try and favour situations which will put you in a position of power. Undermine confidence whenever the opportunity occurs. Prey on insecurity and weakness. Make your anger something people will work to avoid, and thereby use the threat of the anger rather than the anger itself to drive people.

 

What it comes down to is this: if you do something wrong, I will do something nasty. Make people work to avoid that nastiness, and you have the essence of control.

damn, I do all that naturally to maintain my personal space....

 

but it won't work to provoke humans to perform actions to please me... it's too risky for them. it only makes them avoid interaction.

 

which is normally the goal but I find hat I occasionally require actual obeisance.

 

yeah. penguins it is. it's hopeless with this species.

 

thanks for trying.

[Red2111]

@ chuckles - moving to another desk is not optional for me, neither is moving my desk.  i act as both a clerk and a receoptionist and the phone is in one place. 

 

i've also tried talking with my boss about; as i said, all she does is shrug. 

 

i just feel like, as the wedding gets closer, and i get more stressed, my fuse will become non-existant and i'll end up saying something abotu it to him which will get me fired.

 

 

So, i have an entrance exam in a week and im sorta tense, if i pass and become part of the top 200 students to get to do the next stage (interviews), so my question is, how can I

1) stop being tense or maybe a bit less nervous about it?

2) how do i prepare for a phone interview?

 

test anxiety sucks.  what always helped me was listening to classical music at a very low level while taking the test.  ask your test taker if you can do this.   for me it helped level out my focus, and it drowneded out the very distracting background noise.

 

another tip is to just look at things in perspective; while the test is important, the world wont end if you dont pass.  go in with realistic expectations and dont cram the night before.  get a good nights rest before hand, and eat a good breakfast before the test.

 

 

for the interview, alot of what Cindy said.  wear somethign comfy for the phone interview, make sure all distractions are put away and make sure to use professional verbage liek you woudl in a face to face interview.

[lolguy26]

hmm thats not really helpful of your boss red

 

well the thing is, its for a college scholarship so either i get into this or its going to make next year (my last year) a living hell cuz im going to have to Ace an exam which has a pass rate of less than 45% 

 

and the phone interview thing is still pretty far off, but i just thought you guys might have some useful advice.

 

the music thing wont work cuz im doing it in another school, and i also have a listening test (meh ) the only good thing is, its an all girls school,

 

 

thanks both of you for the advice :D

[Knivy]

Best advice I have ever been given for test taking is to always walk in with swagger.  Be confident.  Know the material, and know you know it.  Its better to think you know something and not, than not know it and worry about it (durring the test). 

[lolguy26]

Thanks dude.

 

The thing is the test isn't hard, its a bit too simple..

 

(Its just an english placment test and an IQ test)

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

always look on the bright side of life....

[lolguy26]

such joyful thoughts cindy 

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

of course why wouldn't they be