Spymaster's Report 10/4/08

[Justen Diablos]

I was once asked if I wrote my posts here at DM or if I used word (or some like product) and then copied and pasted to DM.  The answer is the same now as it was then, almost all of my posts are written here at DM.  There have been exceptions of course, my Silly wars stories were written in word, as were most of my AoL high stories (the original AoL high was written straight off the dome on DM one day based on a brief moment of inspiration (also AoL high has been officially canceled due to a complete lack of reader interest.  Maybe someday years from now I'll revisit them, failing that I hoped those of you who read them enjoyed them).  In olden times my Darkwood tales were written in word.  Other than that all my posts have been written in the beautiful DM box that I've come to call home.  The spymaster report specifically has always been me sitting down in front of the computer for four to five hours and just knocking out some randomness.  The reason I mention this is because last week it was not thus, and I felt the whole report lacked a certain something.  So I make this promise to all of my faithful readers (*waves at Empy and Cads from within the parenthesis*) from this day forward my Spymaster report will be written all in one piece for the sake of flow...n stuff.

 

But without further gilding the lilly and with no more ado I bring you ze report.

 

World News

 

The most important news of the day is of course the Election.  One of the most momentous decisions any single country is ever likely to face is happening very soon.  This month in fact...

 

That's right, on October 14 the citizens Canadia will vote upon their Presi...erm, Prime Minister (like there's a difference).  Current frontrunner is also the current PM one Stephen Harper (Incumbant like since '06) a conservative.  And apparantly the only conservative in the race, as his four (that's right four) opponent's for the Presi...erm, Prime Ministry are all a touch left of center.  Doesn't really seem like the best way to win an election for the Liberals if you ask me but what do I know I'm an American...of the United States variety.  Quick rundown of Minister Harper's opponents are Stephane Dion (Liberal Party Leader), Jack Layton (New Democratic Party),  Gilles Duceppe (Separatist Bloc Quebecois (VIVA LA FRANCE(EXCLAMATION POINT))), and Elizabeth May (Green Party in the house, where Ralph Nader at).  So currently Harper is polling at 36% which due to Canadian Clusterf**k is ahead by almost 12% over the next closest candidate (one of the Liberal's I'd reckon) and is also set to take over the majority in Congre...erm Parliament up there (In Canadia majority = 36% (of course due to conversion rates Canadia only has 64% to the US's 100%))  Anyway we'll have to ask our fearless leader Hax who he'll be voting for in the upcoming election.  

 

Next up in World News there's a little less OJ in the free world.  This sadden's me on many levels, firstly the act of actually saying that sentence hurts me (for I dearly love Orange juice).  Secondly for someone who fought so hard to convince my fellow debaters in High School that OJ (of the former football star variety) should be aquitted of murder this is a blow.  In fact for all of us who originally who threw our Dream Team T-shirts on and yelled out F the police this is a dissapointment.  It just seems so uncalled for.  I mean he could have just hung out, playing golf with the President of NBC and writing books completely indicting himself for the rest of his life but no he's got to up and rob a hotel room with a bunch of folk he don't know well enough.  Bah, Bah I say.  The only mitigating factor for me personally is that Karma has indeed won again, you can't go around treating the beautiful women of California the way OJ did and not expect consequences and repurcussions.  So OJ...dueces Biotch.  Don't drop the soap homey.

 

In politics Vice Presidential Candidate Sarah Palin apparantly cheats on her taxes, oh and she makes more than her husband (which is apparantly a scandal as well which I haven't quite figured out).  She also attempted to have a state trooper fired for devorcing her sister, and when told she couldn't do that, she fired the person who told her.   When asked about his VP candidate John McCain responded "Seems like a lot of shenanigans and goings on if you ask me.  Damn wandering Gypsies."  He then fell asleep and when roused had a more concise answer on the subject "She's not working out at all.  I was told she was actually just going to look pretty and bake cookies and s*$t."  Rather than expound on this McCain instead cited pressing business "I've got a bridge game and then bed by 7pm."

 

Fortunately none of this pesky campaigning kept the candidates from their real job, which is screwing over the American people.  Both candidates were said to be very key in getting the 700 billion dollar bailout through congress.  While Obama said it would be a lot better bill if they spent more than a week and a half on it he ultimately claimed it was imperitave the bill pass now, because being able to claim he's done something is better than doing the right thing.  McCain also disliked the bill but worked hard to get it to pass.  He began to anologize the bill to a whorehouse in Denang when he was rushed offstage by adivisers.  For Obama's sake he was out stumping on the jobs issue.  Saying McCain and his fellow Republicans "are killing jobs in America every single day."  When asked what other inanimate objects McCain was killing Obama said "Teddy Bears, Mission Impossible two DvD's, and breadboards made by sixth grade shop students."  

 

Quick news, the Mexican president is looking to legalize small amounts of drugs in Mexico (Dime bags basically (for those of you who know what a dime bag is)).  This includes Meth, Cocaine, and Marijuana among other drugs.  Senior Fox was quoted as saying these measures would decrease the crime rate throughout Mexico.  He went on to outline a rough plan for legalizing murder, saying it would cut illegal killings by 100%.  Can't argue with those numbers.

 

DM News

 

At the main community board some mb kid is conducting scientific polling expiriments.  And also posting random stuff about himself.  I think mb needs an org, not that he can't use the main board, I actually enjoy it when people actually use that board, it's just I think he needs an org.  Right BT?  Damn ALF's kindle post is still up there.  Um, Mungling was looking for a certain thread, which apparantly doesn't exist here, he was looking for the WoT parody, and I believe I remember those as moderately amusing.  I almost followed the link that hybrid posted to the stories...but didn't.  Still if the stories are the same as I remember I'll put a strong JD recommendation on that site.  Hmmm, Kat spends a lot of time at the Main board... She moved a thread about some Bedford Texas meet but Nephitess' (Spymaster favorite) thread about the Canadian Meet is still there (Conspiracy? mayhaps).  

 

And Dark Justice is getting married (or got married I don't care).  The crazy thing is I see this post and I'm thinking to myself I don't care if Dark Justice is getting married or not, I don't even know who that is I then proceed to get mindblown as those wishing him well are a veritable who's who of JD's people.  Barm, Hax, Naeaeaan (Spymaster Favorite), Kat, and my girl Cads all wishing him well.  *shrugs*  I feel like I should know him now...don't, and I'm almost sorry (not almost sorry) about that.

 

That's it for the main board.  Anyone want to guess where I'm going next?

 

Now some of you probably got it right by thinking I bet he'll go to the Seanchan main board without explaining himself again.  I hope he doesn't cry about how much they hate him again to be fair I know some of you were thinking CoL board? I thought he said something about that last week.  sadly that was a flashback (not the drink either.  huh, you've never had a flashback? Or just don't remember anything that happened after the flashback?}.  

 

So the 'Chan boards...Empy complained about Fantasy Baseball, Yours truly (The one and only Justen Diablos) complained about fantasy football, and I'm assuming someone complained about fantasy hockey (I'm not reading a thread about fantasy hockey no matter how much you pay me). Erm, I was going to read some of these threads but I changed my mind.  Here's what's going on over in the 'Chan

 

What are you watching?  « 1 2 ... 26 27 »  Emperor  313  4698   October 03, 2008, 09:52:37 PM

by Tenshin_Xo  

   [GAMES] Release Overload   Silver  7  75   October 03, 2008, 12:26:27 PM

by Silver  

   [TV] AMC developing new show on Red Mars novel...   Emperor  1  17   October 03, 2008, 07:05:39 AM

by Almearafan  

   Grey's Anatomy  « 1 2 »  Siofra Sedai  17  166   October 02, 2008, 06:02:55 AM

by Almearafan  

   [MOVIE] Appaloosa Reviews   Emperor  1  34   October 02, 2008, 02:10:01 AM

by Kara_J  

   Fantasy Hockey « 1 2 3 »  Tenshin_Xo  24  264   October 01, 2008, 10:00:44 AM

by Tenshin_Xo  

   Heroes Discussion Redux  « 1 2 ... 45 46 »  Paityr  549  9638   September 30, 2008, 07:33:40 PM

by reyler  

   Fantasy Football Week 4  Justen Diablos  5  46   September 30, 2008, 06:39:09 PM

by Karana Majin  

   [GAME] Star Wars The Force Unleashed  « 1 2 3 »  Emperor  25  271   September 30, 2008, 11:03:19 AM

by Emperor  

   [TV] LITTLE BRITAIN USA  

 

 

Wow, that's cool.  Copy and paste makes JD happy.  Plus my emoticon doesn't have to go through the pain and suffering of reading those posts.   :D  awwww, look how happy he is.  What a cute widdle guy. *tickles his emoticon*  :P

 

He likes it.

 

At the Aiel board Jekyn is back, and some of the other members are at least pretending to be excited about it, so they might in fact be.  Mystica is spreading the love, I believe that stems from the auction thing with Barm (if I'm remembering my posts correctly) but I'm not sure.  I do know she was over at the 'Chan doing roughly the same thing.  I would have reported it there but i like to get in and out of that 'Chan board as quick as possible you know?  The monthly discussion over there is about horror movies (October being the month of Halloween and all) but so far all they can agree on is that most of the aiel don't like horror movies.  Also one of the stickies over there actually says 'Birthday thread'.  Is that new or was that there when I was reporting all those birthdays those aiel seemed to be having?  I just know they have a grip of birthdays over there.

 

The Band of the Red Hand has fewer stickeys I think, or maybe it's just my perspective on life.   :-\ (that's the undecided emoticon) The spent the week welcoming newbies, and arrandion become a blademaster.  There were a bunch of promotions but none of em Spymaster favorites (or even familiar names) so I'll just give a generic congratulations.  Um, a Bon Jovi song is barely surving as a tune 5-4 right now so I'd encourage everyone to go find that thread and vote tune.  It's Bon Jovi people, they're probably the greatest rock band of all time (yeah, I said it. What?).  Anyway I'm going to move on before i bite clean through my tongue...

 

BLACK TOWER!!!!!!

 

And yes I did just use actual exclamation points.  Part of it is because I was just about to write Black Tower when all the sudden the song 'Hotel' by Cassidy and R.Kelly kicked into my headphones (I haven't heard this song in forever) and I just got excited by the moment.  Black Tower is ok too.  I actually enjoy their board lately.  

 

...

 

I might have to take that back here in a minute.  Lots of long threads but not a lot of content.  I could've sworn I was just reading this board this week and enjoying something but I can't remember what it was.  I know Elgee (Spymaster Favorite) was in there somewhere... um, there's a thread by Dunbar who's technically a CoL so I'll read it (even though he's an annoying teenager)...

 

it was a link.

 

The Black love thread by Mystica starts out pretty well.  Then it degenerates into three word posts with two emoticons and four exclamation points...

 

Roka might be a spymaster favorite...

 

For the record I've been reading the BT board for twenty three minutes...

 

What's a shockwave competition?

 

...

 

Next up the Illuminators. I like the quarterly literary review.  A lot. The stories are just okay for me, but they denote actual thought.  I enjoy thought.  Matalina (The very definition of a Spymaster favorite) changed her theme for her...um, whatever it is.  The Illuminator's are also looking for a new Org Leader...

 

Sign me up Babay(Exclamation point)

 

Can I use the same resume I turned in when I tried to take over the Shayol Ghul Org?  I know it's around here somewhere.  I used it just recently in my application to take over the WT but they said I couldn't have that org since Kat was already doing that and she had 'senority' and 'wasn't f'n crazy' (which I'd like to publically refute).  Anyway if you'd like to be the org leader of the Illumators and could do a better job than me go apply... by e-mailing somewhere, I'd post a link but I don't do that.  You can check out the illuminator's board.  Though if you're a qualified member of that org you probably already know more than I can tell you.

 

I still think the signature board should be a child of the illuminator's...

 

Sig Auction everyone.  You know Cads is the only one who ever starts threads on this board.  I just looked and saw a column of nothing but Cads... needless to say I got excited.  *reads*  Now I know why they need more sig makers.  Cads and that other random chick are all alone in the sig making department (I personally love the chapstick one, I dig lipstick).  There are two reasons this is unnaceptable.  Firstly, my lovely californian goddess needs to spend more time lavishing attention on me, and she can't do that if she's got to make all the sigs for everyone.  And secondly because if everybody has sigs by Cads how will I ever feel special n' stuff.   :(

 

See, go help make sigs so my emoticon can stop being so sad.

 

Damn, it's late, I've been writing this forever.  I guess it's because I've had to sort through so many posts on account of my prolongued absence.  Still though I'm going to have to cut time somewhere because I'm wicked tired.  I'm either going to skip Shayol Ghul or Wolfkin.  I'm leaning toward the wolfies but I might flip a coin.

 

For now let's move on to the Kin.  Hey, I think samuraiflip isn't a member of the illuminators.  Because I just now realized I didn't see one of his HOLY COW posts on their board (and yes I've read each one there flip, stop it, stop it now dude  :P (I'm still trying to figure out why he made a point to say one year and two days).  Ya know Mystica's message of love is growing on me.  The Spammer's challenge is up really high.  Someday I'm going to read that whole thread, then grab an uzi and go deer hunting. *nods*   Hey that one brit girl Chiyuki joined the Kin.  Nice.  I mean she should have joined the 'Chan after I rolled out all that red carpet for her but I blame that more on Nia than anyone else...

 

Speaking of Nia where is she?  I haven't seen a single Nia post tonight.  Maybe I'll find one at the...

 

Ogier (Was going to segway into White Tower but everyone knows I save the best for last (not that the Ogier don't rock, because I tend to enjoy that board).  Does DM get slower around 4am central time?  It tends to seem so.  I just hope it doesn't stop working entirely.  KellySedai's grandma turned 90, and KSedai is from the south (because southerners are the only ones I've ever heard refer to grams as Mamaw).  Congrats on being 90 n' stuff mamaw.  Definately slower page loading. Might have to skip SG and the wolfies  :P.  

 

...

 

*checks watch*

 

For real though I might just have to call this a report.  I guess I'm going to start writing my conclusion as I wait for pages to load.

 

I'm going to bold conclusion and just flow off that.

 

Back to the Ogier...

 

winds of time posted a poll asking whether or not he should bring back the self defense course.  If I remember correctly those were funny to read, especially considering this is Ogier we're talking about.  So I say yeah, bring em back.

 

Shayol Ghul gets the official make JD giggle at five am award.  Because the first thread I read was the 'Three word story (game)' thread and thought to myself Shayol ghul have posts, I read posts  But I wouldn't do that to ya again.  Even though no one has yet explained to me the whole points system.  

 

Moggy is going on a vacation to go play in a badmitten tourney.  *nods*  And yes I know that's awesome.  Blig Blog has returned (I didn't even know he'd left, but I bet he stabs something in this thread)...

 

Damn that thread started august fourth.  That's why I've read so much tonight, because I never know when these threads started n' stuff.  A lof of the Ghul's stuff carries over forever.

 

By the way FDM I'm watching your posts.  

 

The corrupt a wish game is clever and funny and stuff.  So we'll leave the Ghul on that note.

 

Finally, (saving the best for last) it's the White Tower

 

Christine has returned, and I properly welcomed her back on the WT RP board, though I was accused of spamming *aghast*.  The Green Ajah is doing a good/evil swap.  Ireond posted some poetry and stuff for Dwyn.  Most of the other stuff is carried over from before (or links, there's like three durn links (meaning three threads with links in them, the actual link total is like fifty (not fifty) or something))  So sorry my beloved White Tower, you're getting cut due to my being tired n' stuff.

 

 

Conclusion

 

Well thus ends another Spymaster Report.  I think I read too many posts, it made me jaded and stuff.  I'm wicked tired.  And it's friday night (saturday morning) so technically I should be drunk. *g* so I think I'll just call it a night.  I'll make it up to the Wolfies by doing a salute to the Wolfkin next week.  

 

JD,

Spymaster

 

 

 

[Cadsuane]

There's nothing better than someone making you giggle before you get out of bed on a Saturday morning (note, I started reading this before 8 am). Unless it's someone making you... something else before getting out of bed. But all things considered, I'll go ahead and take the giggle for now, and be satisfied.  ;)

 

Thanks for the attempt to rally folks to the sig boards, and as always, the report does not disappoint.  :-*

 

 

-kt

On her way to vote for Bon Jovi, if she is allowed to do so. It's now or never, I ain't gonna live forever.

[Corki]

As it is a weekly thing, polls in "Tune or No Tune" only stay open for a week. So it is a bit late for Bon Jovi, but do head over to the Kin for the latest thread (and Fleetwood Mac).

[Barmacral]

The AoL High bit disappoints me, because I've been eagerly awaiting the 6th installment since you posted the 5th in Seanchan Private boards.

[Guest Far Dareis Mai]

Very entertaining, as always.  :D

[Emperor]

I think the Chan need to be mentioned more often. 

[Tenshin_Xo]

I think the Chan need to be mentioned more often. 

QFT!

 

I will though say that my ego(or something) was satiated by the three quasi-mentions that I got.  I think thats a first for me in a spymaster.  This upstart is making his way up in the world. :P

[Roka]

... um, there's a thread by Dunbar who's technically a CoL so I'll read it (even though he's an annoying teenager)...

 

it was a link.

 

I'd mock you, but I have more urgent matters to attend to *nods*

[Alaksuleiel]

hilarious as ever :D

[Moghedian]

I was once asked if I wrote my posts here at DM or if I used word (or some like product) and then copied and pasted to DM.

 

*Gasp* My question got answered!!! :o ;D

 

 Mystica is spreading the love, I believe that stems from the auction thing with Barm (if I'm remembering my posts correctly) but I'm not sure.

 

She was my slave for the week.  :P :shock: Another Moggy reference!!! This is turning into a very pleasing report.  ;D (Yes, I just used that emoticon again when  :D would have done just as well :P (repeats the offence))

 

Even though no one has yet explained to me the whole points system.  

 

Meh, because I am bored and avoiding studying, here is the link to the explanation page.

 

Moggy is going on a vacation to go play in a badmitten tourney.  *nods*  And yes I know that's awesome.  

 

WOW! This time I was mentioned by name  ;D *Can't help but use that emoticon in this point in time*

 

*Labels the Spymaster's Report as her favourite so far*  ;D :D :) 8) :P