American Idol Sucks!

[SinisterDeath]

Thank you, Our Lady of the Spear.  I really like David Cook, but he lost chips on that one.  I will keep the posts shorter and I hope you enjoyed the commentary.  There aren't many Seanchan watching Idol, it seems.  Which performer is your favorite? Who do you dislike?

 

...and Mr. SinisterDeath, I appreciate your commentary and in the words of Steve Martin....

 

How about a compromise?

 

Instead of doing 1 post per contestent (or whatver your format is) combine 2 of your posts into 1 post, so if you have 6, you'd have 3 posts, and 4 would = 2.

 

And you can sepperate a wall of text with larges spaces

 

 

 

Like this.

I say this to save my sanity!

Your like Aslov and I'm the dog... Everytime I see seanchan sparkle up, I drool! ;)

[Myndrunner]

Ah yes sir, we have an accord then!  *shakes hands with SinisterDeath firmly*  I shall minimize the frequency of my posts, as to not salivate your Seachan appetite; yet, I will continue with multiple, less daunting posts that make it easier for my readers (reader?) to embrace.

 

And I see no need to bring the Don into this.....if he existed, of course. heh heh.....

*looks around nervously*

[Guest Far Dareis Mai]

I can't say that I have a favorite, per se...but I do typically enjoy the performances by David Cook, the David Archipelago kid, and Carly. I like their voices, and I typically like their song choice. I think when it comes to pure raw talent, these three are at the top.

 

Personality wise, it's much harder to read, since they are all playing happy slappy to get votes, but I think I would like Cook's, and Irish chick the best. The kid is just too teeny bopper for me. Not that personality should make a whit of difference, but it's nice to know that the person getting the contract isn't going to be some automoton. :P

[Myndrunner]

I agree with your somewhat favorites.  Carly is clearly the best of the women,IMO, and I hope she makes it to at least the final four; but I do feel that she loses votes because of her husband.  Hate to say that, but it's the world we live in, I'm afraid. 

 

David Cook will sell albums with or without Idol, but I think he will be one of the final two.  The other being Archuleta. 

 

Help me with something.  What is the appeal of Jason Castro?

 

Also, congrats on your future Maiden (or Stone Dog?) due in June!

[ironcross]

is there really anyone left in america who even watches idol????  or cares???  i havent seen a single episode in three years. nore do i plan to.

[Myndrunner]

Perhaps there are only a few who read Robert Jordan and watch Idol.  I tuned out last year, but I got hooked this year....some good talent, and some already have CDs.  I think this girl Brooke White is going to have a nervous breakdown tomorrow night.  You should check it out.

[Guest Far Dareis Mai]

I've watched Idol every year but one of them, and I watch it because I studied music at uni, and I like to see if my critique's and predictions turn out to be correct. Thus far I've been spot on. :D

 

Help me with something.  What is the appeal of Jason Castro?

 

Also, congrats on your future Maiden (or Stone Dog?) due in June!

 

I honestly think they are keeping Jason Castro (and until recently, Brooke) around for two reasons. 1. He obviously isn't as good as Cook, Archuleta, and Smithson, so his staying around will almost guarantee the three of the others moving forward. And 2. There has yet to be any serious folk music contenders on Idol. We've run the gamut on Hip Hop, R&B, Rock, Country, etc. But we haven't seen much Folk, which brings in a whole new audience and interest.

 

On a completely superficial level, he likes to do the "Mr.Shy", and "Boy next door" bit, and girls like that, despite the fact he can't comb his hair. :P Too bad he can't lay it on like the Archuleta kid though, he'll go down eventually, but I think Brooke and the Aussie are going to go first. :D

 

And thanks, it's definitely going to be a Maiden.  ;D

 

 

[Myndrunner]

I tend to agree with nearly everything Simon says, perhaps not always how he says it though. I see what you mean about the folk singers.  With the surge of Jason Blunt's and Plain White Tee's, they probably see the  need to keep Brooke and Jason around.  Of course, that implies that American Idol is rigged.  You might as well be saying there is a Seachan Family, too.  Ridiculous!

 

I think Brooke is going home this week.  KLC really saved her hide Tuesday night, but her days are numbered as well.  I think the Aussie is improving though and could gain some fans that are starting to get sick of Clifford the Muppet.  I really think that the final four will be the two Davids, Carly, and Michael Johns.

[Yveva]

I always forget to stop by this board, but I am amused by this thread even though I don't watch Idol.  I like amusing commentary.

 

 

I know what it's like to lose votes because of my husband :P

[Guest Far Dareis Mai]

I would be inclined to agree with you about Michael Johns, except that he is so forgettable. And I don't mean any offense by it, but he has made the least amount of impression on me. That's not to say he isn't talented...but he just hasn't shown the charisma that many of the others have. I think that could really hurt him in the coming weeks. Even KLC gets a lot of attention, because she is always in the bottom 3. I'm finding that attention is attention, whether good or bad. :P Another person that I think might run into this problem is the Whitney Houston wannabe (I seriously can't remember her name). She has a great voice...but I think her choosing high profile songs, and her lack of charisma make her unrelatable.

 

As far as Idol being rigged, I wouldn't come out and say that the judges are the ones really choosing who is around....insomuch as the voting is just a front. But I do think that their comments have a huge impact on how the voting goes. People really tend to listen to what they say, for good or ill. I think that a lot of KLC's votes come from a sympathy vote, and I also think that if Brooke doesn't go home tonight, it will be the same sort of case--the sympathy vote.

 

Anywho, I look forward to seeing how it goes tonight. I would ultimately be satisfied if either Brooke or KLC went home, since I think they are the next two to go anyway. 

[Myndrunner]

Thanks Madam Empress, may you live forever, I appreciate the feedback.  I was beginning to think that Seanchans are a tough crowd.  *yanks nervously on his gleeman's collar* I kept getting the feeling I was gonna get whacked or something. 

 

I have to agree with you, FDM.  Sometimes bad attention is still attention, and never underestimate the sympathy vote.  Sometimes people vote more because they are skurred that their favorite might get booted. Also, one should factor where Ramielle's votes will go now that she is gone.  I think the warm display of sisterhood KLC displayed when Miss Codependent got booted (even if gratuitous) will earn her more votes this week.  Sorry Brooke, but your Christian Folk Music Career is about to begin.

 

Two weeks ago, I would have agreed with you about Johns being forgettable, but I have to admit his last two performances have been a BLOOMIN' ONION!!!!  He has been the most improved of the contestants musically, especially since he no longer is chained to the bloody Lennon/McCartney songbook.  Still, it could be a case of too little too late.  Casto may oust him for fourth place. 

 

*sigh*...it should be quite the train wreck tonight watching Brooke unravel.  I'll bring the popcorn!

[Myndrunner]

Well, so much for my predictions.....a truly SHOCKING American Idol elimination show, that has fans all over the internet crashing servers with protest.  The AI official forum crashed minutes after announcing tonights elimination.  Who was it?  In the fine words of Robert Jordan.....RAFO!

 

AND THEN THERE WERE 7 - Elimination Recap

 

I will spare you all the Idol Gives Back filler, only to tell you that there are some truly needy people out there.  Even the coldest of the cold would not have been able to sit through last night or the promo spots tonight without feeling your heart being pulled.  So, give what you can in any way you can, ok?

 

Now, having said that, there was no charity in tonights elimination.  8 contestants were left, and they marched the first five straight over to the couches of safety.  In a night full of shock and awe, Brooke White, who had medical teams standing by for her inevitable break down, could not wipe away her endless tears.  Ryan asked why she was so emotional last week.  Her reply was that her sister was getting married this weekend and she would not be able to see her.  Surprisingly, she wont.  Her tears became that of joy as she was ushered to the purple couch of safety. 

Brooke White is happy not to be eliminated this week.

 

Looking like he just rolled out of bed, a not-quite sure of himself David Cook emerged from behind the stage to be the second contestant sent to safety.  He stumbled over, half asleep, into the gleeful arms of Brooke White.  He looked almost as surprised to see her there as the rest of America. 

 

Noticing a trend, the Archies as his fans are apparently called....I prefer the Troll Patrol, but anyway, David Archuleta could not have been meeker in hearing the words everyone knew Ryan would say:.....You're SAFE!  He goshed and gollyed his way across the stage and took his seat next to sleepy and weepy.

 

Returning from the nail biting commercial break (yawn), Clifford the Muppet was called out to center stage.  With the first three contestants all given free passes, I was sure that Jason Castro was fated to take a stool.  But the Darkfriends triumphed once again, and he sauntered over to his spot on the couch.  It is clear to me that they do not perform random drug screenings on American Idol, where cannabis may actually be a performance enhancing drug.  Anyways, he took his place next to sleepy, weepy, and bashful. 

Jason Castro is happy to find out what planet he is on.

 

 

(--------continued after my own personal commercial break-----------------)

[Myndrunner]

And Then There Were 7 - Elimination Recap (cont..)

 

*Note: Recaps of the endless Idol Gives Back filler and gratuitous washing of Jordin Sparks feet in holy water eliminated for your pleasure.  She looked like she was expecting a box of Krispy Kremes instead of awards for her ITune accolades.*

 

So, four dwarves sitting safely on the couch....and four puzzled dwarves backstage, all stunned that neither Brooke nor Castro are sitting on an elimination stool.  You could see them all doing the math, only one of them would be safe. And that is when Ryan called out the KLC.

 

After a surprisingly fantastic performance on Tuesday, would Kristie Lee Cook avoid elimination this week?  Apparently, she was almost as shocked as the rest of us when Ryan informed her that she was safe.  Stunned, she staggered her way over to join Weepy, Sleepy, Bashful, and of course....Dopey. 

One of the 7 remaining contestants....guess which one.

 

Well, no one needed to do the math now.  With five contestants safe, the remaining three were brought out to center stage.  Michael Johns, Carly Hennessy-Smithson, and Syesha Mercado.  Just before commercial break, Ryan Seacrest asked which of the three the Audience thought was going home and Carly answered with "ITS ME!" 

 

Fast forward through the drama, shocked judges and audience members alike gasped in unison when Michael Johns was selected next........to go home.  This marks the first time that 30 million fans yelled BULL***T at the same time.  Even in a last ditch plea for amnesty, Seacrest mentioned that usually they do not eliminate anyone during Idol gives back week.......but this year they will.  Although it really seemed like a CACK move on Ryan's part, in hind-sight, he was probably mentioning that to see if the producers would nod in approval.  Not even Chuck Norris could overturn this decision and the Aussie Boss performed his swan song. 

 

I jumped on the Idol boards to see what people were saying, and to get better material than I had, but suddenly in mid read, their server crashed.  Their forums were unavailable, a first as far as I can remember.

 

Anyways, G'Day there mate!  See you next year with your band while Jordin Sparks eats another Klondike Bar.  And now, the seven dwarves are left......Weepy, Sleepy, Bashful, Dopey, Country, Whitney, and Gothy.  High HO! High HO! It's off to bed I go.

[ironcross]

i would rather watch olympic ice skating... at least in that rigged competition you get to look at pretty girls. i think thats why no one i know even cares about idol anymore, they know its rigged to the gills.

[Myndrunner]

Now there's an idea.  If they ran Idol like Ice Skating, Tonya Harding would break Kristie Lee Cook's legs with a crowbar.  No, wait...she would have her boyfriend hire someone to break her legs with a crowbar.

 

They have to have some level of control on this show.  If it was purely a popularity contest, Clifford the Muppet would win this thing. 

[Guest Far Dareis Mai]

I wasn't entirely surprised. Brooke pulled out the sympathy vote, and fans overcompensated KLC's first good performance. There is no surviving that, even if you have your first notable performance. I think next week will see to Syesha's demise, or perhaps KLC. I actually think Brooke has some staying power, now that we know people get all revved up with a bad review for her (I don't think it's right, but people are notoriously stupid sometimes. :P). I also think that the judges realize it too, and so will alter their critique's accordingly.

[Myndrunner]

You're right.  Never underestimate the power of the performance vote.  I think that there are three types of voters.  There are those who vote for their favorite, even if they suck.  This explains Clifford the Muppet's staying power.  Second, we have the performance voters, explaining KLC's amnesty last week. 

 

Thirdly, we have those who vote AGAINST someone, like those who rally people to vote for the worst contestants.  There are several radio stations and a few websites that back this "rogue" mentality. 

Remember Sanjay?

 

I think that KLC did have one other good performance (not great, just good) with Greenwood's Proud to be an American.  She has made two smart choices that has kept her alive twice.  I think she has been lucky otherwise.  Or maybe the conspirators are correct. 

[Haxorsist]

The Papaya was the only good thing about the last season.

[Guest Far Dareis Mai]

Ugh, Sanjaya was just too much for me. Remember the wacked out mohawk?

[Yveva]

(psssst.  I forgot to say this last time, but props for the Eddie Izzard sig and icon)

[Emperor]

The only reason I glanced at Idol last season was to see Sanjaya win it.  I will back anything that brings down Idol and returns us to better TV. 

[Myndrunner]

Thanks Yveva!  I have a couple more in the works that should be pretty cool.  Faelene did the wandering gleeman one, and a fantastic job.  I had to write a ballad in exchange for it.  Check it out in the Illuminator's Org. 

 

Vote for the Worst is a great site.  It rallies people to vote for the worst contestant to really stick it to them.  Sanjaya Papaya lost because the show is definitely rigged.

 

I've got a pretty decent show recap and predictions ready to post in a couple hours.....I hope the four of you who read this thread will enjoy.  *bows*

[Guest Far Dareis Mai]

I've been waiting since last night Mynd, you are slacking! ;)

[Myndrunner]

Hi Ho! Hi Ho! It's time for another to GO!

 

And speaking of High Hoes, it was Mariah Carey week on American Idol!  Yep, that means that our 7 finalists were treated/forced to sing songs from the shrieking songstress' illustrious music catalog.  That pretty much covers everyone she's ripped off in her career too. 

This is actually the only picture I found that DM would allow me to post of her.

 

One would figure that this would be a night for the girls to shine while the guys would struggle.  Oh contrare....contraire....con......well, you're wrong. 

 

David Archuletta: Let the Chosen One from the Troll Patrol rejoice!! The heir apparent to Wayne Newton shuffled his way to the stage, wearing Rand's old Asha'man jacket and Amanda Overmeyer's leather pants.  He came to rock our world.....in a meek and humble way.  And he did!  Sining Carey's Believe, he wooed teens and grandmothers with a powerful metro-male version of her ballad.  He did try to hit the signature Mariah Cary high note, but alas his leather pants were not tight enough. 

Prediction: He could win the whole thing...unless he hits puberty first.

 

Carly Hennesy-Smithson: Mistress Carly finally revealed herself as the head of the Black Ajah, by appearing in a black dress and a witches amulet she stole from the set of Charmed.  Also taking a cue from Paula and her....ahem.....chihuahuas, she let her Irish Setter Puppies loose in a desperate attempt to earn votes.  It worked for Mariah, maybe it will work for Carley.  Maybe try leaving the painted husband at home too.  Anyways, her song choice was Without You and unlike her angry performance last week, she was all smiles at the end of a much better performance.  Perhaps she felt that she was singing on borrowed time with the surprise departure of Johns last week.  Either way, she probably has one of the best voices on the show....but this is Idol.....and it's the final 7.  Even a great performance would only keep her alive for another week.....and Carly's was merely ok. 

Prediction: We're saying goodbye to Carly tonight.

[Myndrunner]

Well, with Bashful and Scary dwarf done, we moved on to....

 

Syesha Mercado: One would think that the contestant who was created with part of Mariah's DNA would kill this week.  Well, she did alright but here's the problem that Simon pointed out; all of the women would be compared to Mariah herself.  And once again, the Diva Clone was merely an acceptable compared to how Mariah sung Vanishing, her song choice.  Whitney Dwarf is lovely and has a great voice, but America has been there and done that with all the Tamara Grays, Jordin Sparks, and Fantasias out there. 

Prediction: Bottom three, but saved because Carly will go tonight.

Wonder Clones.....activate!

 

Brooke White: Why does the Psycho theme begin to play in my mind when I see her?  Simon should expect to find boiling rabbits in his condo after his commentary; but even Paula, who was representing the Purple Ajah that night and hiding her chihuahuas, made a whistling comment about her being more passionate.  I think asking Brooke White to be more passionate about her music is like suggesting to Flava Flav that he be more flamboyant.  Medical teams were standing by offstage, but no nervous breakdown that night; but the piano couldn't save her.  Expect the shakes to come when the neurotic nanny sits in the bottom three tonight.  Oh yeah, I think she sung Hero.  I think she's hoping for one.

Prediction: Bottom three, but won't go home tonight unless on a stretcher.

I can't go home! I'm the American Idol, damnit!

 

 

Let's not forget Paula's WHERE'S THE BEEF comment?  When Simon said he felt like Brooke's performance was like a big juicy hamburger without the beef, Paula solidified herself in the 80's with her obscure attempt at a funny by shouting "WHERE'S THE BEEF?"....to the applause of crickets everywhere. 

One of these is still as funny today as it was in the 80's!