This hot thread is too hot to HANDEL!!!

[hazelkrs1]

Just saw a GREAT pun somewhere else, and since this thread IS about disassociated puns, here goes:

 

Well first off I hate to do this cause it almost breaks the rules about dissasociated puns, which I haven't actually gotten to writing yet, but it's a hilarious pun in context, and I feel obliged to give you some of that context.

 

So Matt Bonner is a forward on the Spurs known for his long range shooting- he's actually not that athletic at all and is one of the few gingers in the NBA. He also has some funny tidbits, he's probably one of the more down to Earth players in the league, has some funny youtube videos featuring him as a character named "Coach B". More importantly however he has an interesting nickname - "The Sandwich Hunter". This is because he has a well documented love of sandwiches, and will even blog about the best sandwiches he has in diff areas.

 

Yet lately he has elevated his game in a strange way, snatching tons of rebounds and playing much more physical. Heck, he even got a nice little monster jam the other night. It was the third dunk I've EVER seen from him, prob because I think it's his third dunk in the NBA.

 

Anyways, without further adieu-

 

Bonner just ripped a board from Tiago. Matt's gotta be juicing -- au jus'ing.

 

— Pounding the Rock (@poundingtherock) 6 hours ago

 

(Tiago Splitter is another one of our players fyi)

 

 

I seriously guffawed loudly. I a good pun

[hazelkrs1]

Someone tried bumping this thread off the front page

 

[Cbinpdx]

These puns leave me treble-ing with laughter!

[hazelkrs1]

There we go! Get in on the fun Jani!

 

[hazelkrs1]

What did one B vitamin say to the other when they first saw eachother?

 

"Why hello there, Niacin to meet you"

 

 

Best I got off the top of my head right now. Tryin to make these puns more disassociated

[Cbinpdx]

What did one B vitamin say to the other when they first saw eachother?

 

"Why hello there, Niacin to meet you"

 

 

Best I got off the top of my head right now. Tryin to make these puns more disassociated

 

 

He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

[Cbinpdx]

What do you mean you can't tuna fish? Just adjust its scales.

 

.

[Turin Turambar]

I saw a billboard advertisinga boxster. It said:

 

Get yourself a one Porsche open sleigh

[Cbinpdx]

ah hahahahaha! good one!

 

I only listen to waltzes 3/4 of the time. 

 

 

[Cbinpdx]

The novel about a musician in treble was a real clef-hanger.

 

 

[Netbattler11]

If you keep this up my brain will get destrung

[ReleaseTheEvil]

Moar puns!

 

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

I'm glad I know sign language, it's pretty handy.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

There was a sign on the lawn at a drug re-hab center that said 'Keep off the Grass'.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

I try wearing tight jeans, but I can never pull it off.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

No one knew she had a dental implant until it came out in a conversation.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

[ReleaseTheEvil]

My friend was fired from his job at the road department for stealing. I have to say I saw it coming. The last time I was at his house all the signs were there.