Demi's amazing journey, or: A LOG OF THE LOA, WITH PICTURES!

[Dunbar]

So, as some of you may know, I went on a one week LOA about two weeks ago, and I'm sure at least some of you wondered "Hmm, I wonder where that magnificent and awesome dude, Dunbar (aka The Demigod) went for a week, I'd like to know more about what this awesome dude was doing!", whilst other were probably too busy partying to think anything at all.

 

WELL. For those few select, here's a detailed travel manuscript, scripted by yours truly, to give you further insight into the exciting life of a Norwegian 18 year old.

 

Toodle-oo!

 

Tuesday, june the 23rd, 2009

The start of the amazing journey. I got up, did whatever one does at waking up (scratching oneself and eating toast, pretty much), and decided to play some Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater. This is a good way to spend your time!

About 2 pm, I realized the train would leave in two hours, and decided to start packing. I'm a fast packer, and as usual, I packed about 150% too many clothes (*cough* that is, no clothes at all*cough*), being left with a far too heavy backpack. *sigh* And then, I boarded the bus for town, and the journey went like so:

 

 

It has begun, as they say.

Safely in town, I met up with my partners in crime, this bright bunch:

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0105.jpg[/img]

Notice me, not doing what you think I'm doing near my crotch

Also, I'm actually nude, you just can't handle it and so area projecting clothes unto me with your sick, sick minds

 

ANYHOW. We bought food (YUM YUM YUM) and two pizzas that we could eat on the train!

We boarded the train at 4 pm, excited to start the journet of epic proportions:

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0056.jpg[/img]

Trains are AWESOME

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0057.jpg[/img]

About five minutes later, zzzzzzzzz

 

 

We first took the train to Drammen:

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/Untitled-12.jpg[/img]

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0103.jpg[/img]

See the little sign between us saying «Drammen»!? That's proof is what that is! Somehow, we managed to miss the huge, glowing  sign that said «Drammen togstasjon» (that's Drammen Trainstation for the lot of you)

 

And then, from there to our final destination, Sandefjord:

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/Untitled-3.jpg[/img]

 

And also, on the way, we stopped at Finse. Finse was, a whole buncha years, used to film a movie. You know which movie that was? Star Wars: The Empire strikes back, is what movie! I'VE BEEN TO HOTH!

 

YEAAAAAH!

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0063.jpg[/img]

How it looked in Star Wars

 

How it looked when we were there

 

I might've gotten something mixed up.

 

The train took no more than 9 and a half hours. Oh, and the maps show the road if it were by car, imagine a more straight line, if you will.

 

On it, when not sleeping, we watched stand up comedy on a computer with little to no battery capacity or I read Sandman. Mmmm, Sandman.

 

As we arrived, by boat, at about 1:30 in the AM, it was late and we were sweaty and sleepy, and so we went to bed.  YES, THE HOUSE IS ON A LITTLE FRIGGIN' ISLAND! SWEET, EH!?

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0113.jpg[/img]

Here's where we sto-... Picked up my friend's boat!

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0119.jpg[/img]

Demi in sunset

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/bpt.jpg[/img]

 

Also, time without decent shower: 24 hours.

 

 

Wednesday, june the 24th, 2009

I woke up around 12:00 in the midday, it was hot as all hell. I decided to explore this new and exciting place.

 

It looked like this:

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0213.jpg[/img]

Hell's yeah!

 

Things to know about the house:

There was no internet, except a little after 5, and that was about the slowest internet ever seen by man. We're talking 5 minutes to download a word document.

There was no decent running water, except in a hose (YOU CAN SEE THAT ON THE PICTURE!), so all water in the house came from a well.

There was a fridge, but it kept a steady temp of 10 degrees celcius. I'm not going to bother to convert that.

There was an outhouse for pooing and such, urinating was to be conducted outside, near a tree somewhere we wouldn't normally walk preferrably.

It was hot as all hell. It kept at about 31 degrees celcius, that's about 88 degrees fahrenheit, for you with a dumb and illogical way of measuring temperatures (<.<)

 

So, during the course of this first day, I spent the time getting almost killed by the sun, playing ping pong, grilling some delicious chicken for dinner (we bought about 2 kilograms of rice, enough to last a small army for weeks) and bathing in the salty ocean. Mmmm, salty ocean. Also, reading more sandman, like so:

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0123.jpg[/img]

Because reading's what vacation's for

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0130.jpg[/img]

Ping pong, Demi not pictured

 

Also I nearly got killed by an earthwasp, that stung my middle toe. The bastard.

 

Out to get me

 

And then, after a hard day's work of slacking, we slept. Zzzzz....

 

Time without decent shower: 48 hours.

 

 

Thursday, june 25th, 2009

Wake up, eat breakfast, swim in the ocean, clean self with water spraying from hose. So are the days of our lives. What else, this day. We found a fast boat, boated fastly to a nearby food shoppe, and went a-shoppin' for foodstuffs of all sizes and tastes. And lots of nuts. At first, the boat died, refusing to help us on our noble quest, but after half an hour of sizzling in the sun and bickering with it, it lived! The day was otehrwise spent playing ping pong, badminton and eating a lucious spaghetti for dinner.

 

Reading: World War Z, friggin' awesome!

 

Time without decent shower: 72 hours.

 

 

Friday, june 26th, 2009

Found air rifle, decided to shoot things with it, mainly little baloons filled with water. Didn't hit a single one, felt inadequate, cried self to sleep.

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0183.jpg[/img]

DIE, YOU BASTARDS, DIE!

 

Went out in sailboat, had traumatic experience as we almost hit a reef, also, water everywhere.

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0194.jpg[/img]

Also, I was there at some point, and nearly fell in water o_o

 

Also, bathing and ping pong. Cannot remember what was eaten for dinner. This puzzles and disturbs me.

 

Reading: World War Z, still awesome!

 

Time without decent shower, 96 hours.

 

 

Saturday, june 27th, 2009

Most lazy day ever lived, did NOTHING all day, bathed early in morning, played ping pong a time or two, laid on hot couch reading and munching nuts (you people are sick).

In other news, I pwnd in ping pong, beating my nemesis a dazzling 6-3 in sets. Also, I pwnd in Risk, the most exciting board game ever?

 

Like this, only I was there, and I kicked butt!

 

Also, heard news of the death of Michael Jackson, lamented, wailed to disinterested friends. The bastards.

 

http://fineartamerica.com/images-medium/michael-jackson-sad-clown-david-devries.jpg[/img]

 

Taco for dinner, I say yummy!

 

Reading: Finished World War Z, started reading Transmetropolitan, WHICH IS ALSO AWESOME YEAH!

 

Time without decent shower: 120 hours.

 

 

Sunday, june 28th, 2009

Went for hike in forest, almost got eaten by ants. The bastards.

 

Like this

 

Out to get me

 

Ended up at mini-golf place, mini-golf was played, came in second by one measly point (DAMNIT!), ice cream was consumed. Mmmm, ice cream.

 

Like this, only I nearly won

 

Further pwnage in ping pont. I'm on a winning streak. Roast potatoes and chicken wings for dinner.

 

Reading: Transmetropolitan

 

Time without decent shower: 134 hours.

 

 

Monday, june 29th, 2009

Went boating to a cluster of rocky islands, where jumping into the ocean and trying desperately to avoid jellyfish was on the menu.

 

http://www.allthepages.org/photoblog/images/white_jellyfish-mar06.jpg[/img]

Out to get me

 

After this, we went a-shoppin' again, buying more vital foodstuffs and ice cream to boot. For dinner: leftovers, yaaay! We have, by this point, nearly halved our supply of rice. Also, slacking and  Risk, WHICH I NEARLY WON THIS TIME, but then they all ratted against me and obliterated me, the bastards.

Got depressed, found air rifle, found milk carton with image of Aleksander Rybak on (The Norwegian winner of the Music Grand Prix in Europe, HE WON!). Sick and tired of his song, decided to shoot him.

 

He's in love with a hairy male, even though it hurts

 

The song:

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0211.jpg[/img]

He won't be singing for a while

 

Reading: Thud! By Terry Pratchett. It's lovely.

 

Time without decent shower: 158 hours.

 

Tuesday, june 30th, 2009

In the early hours, there was found a sailboard. No idea if that's what you call 'em. (it seems google thinks that's what you call 'em!)

I tried it:

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0231.jpg[/img]

HOLY CRAP I'M AWESOME

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0232.jpg[/img]

About two seconds later

 

The rest of the day was spent slacking and packing ye olde bag, preparing for departure. Also, monopoly was played, and I was tricked out of victory by the ancient enemy: Time.

 

Took dramatic image of self:

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0215.jpg[/img]

Oooh, the drama

 

Finished Thud!, am now officially out of reading material (NOOOOOOOOOO).

 

For dinner, 2,5 hot dogs and a mountain of rice.

 

Time without decent shower: 182 hours. (whoo-ee!)

 

 

Wednesday, jule 1st, 2009

Woke up and did something new and amazing, showered! Unnatural feeling of cleanness settled over me, quite unnatural. Consumed breakfast and spent next few hours musing over the trip so far, and eating ice cream. Boated to dock, taxi'd to train and trained home.

Arrived home at 11:30 in the PM and went to sleep, HOME AT LAST.

 

Reading: All the news I've missed out on during my absence

 

Time without shower: 12 hours.

 

 

[cosmicpanda]

You live up to the reputation of smelly shadowspawn. Looks like a good trip  :D

[Justen Diablos]

Wow, that trip looks amazing and exciting, and your retelling of your fantastic journey has left me with the strong desire to play Risk...

 

Because it's awesome n' stuff.

 

JD,

Knowing that Aisa is an impossible thing to conquer and hold since the great Risk wars of 2006

[Barmacral]

I too have the strong urge to play risk right now. Looks like a fun trip, highly entertaining read.

[Nynaeve]

I like your dramatic face  *grins*

 

 

 

Nyn

[Dunbar]

Why thank you, good people

 

I also need more Risk

 

we should have a risk get-together

[Naeann]

Might be risky.

[Edielin]

Demi's Amazing Journey: What Really Happened

 

Requiring a map, Demi handily marks "A" and "B" on a map of Norway from the 1950s. Whoops.

 

His fellow travellers: theoretical nudists to Demi's practical nudism.

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0105.jpg[/img]

Note the position of Demi's downmost finger.

 

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0056.jpg[/img]

Demi is enthralled by the concept of wheels.

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0057.jpg[/img]

Five minutes later: Demi is no longer enthralled

 

 

Drammen: Known for its interestingly clover-shaped area.

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/Untitled-12.jpg[/img]

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0103.jpg[/img]

Dram-dram-drammen brings temporary amnesia, and now even I can't spell it. Also, Edielin is half-Danish so of course he knows.

 

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/Untitled-3.jpg[/img]

Note "A" and "B" are again present.

 

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0063.jpg[/img]

I'd stay away from Hoth, Demi.

 

Five minutes later: A lesson for all Edielin's skeptics.

 

 

 

 

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0113.jpg[/img]

Imitation of Edielin's plan to become the next Prime Minister of Italy doesn't work. Trust me.

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0119.jpg[/img]

The residents have lived peaceful lives... Until the enigmatic Mr McDuff appears in the harbour. Quoth Edielin, "I told thee, Demi McDuff"

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/bpt.jpg[/img]

Satellites never work for world domination. Also, minions hate Microsoft Paint. But nice pic.

 

 

 

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0213.jpg[/img]

Images of the Future: 2400's war bunker

 

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0123.jpg[/img]

I thought you'd finished "World Domination for Dummies"? Never mind, back to the drawing boar... Artistic minion.

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0130.jpg[/img]

The cabal squabble for grand Vizier status, unaware of the virtues of a pancake contest. Don't, Demi. Everyone knows viziers always betray you anyway.

 

 

 

I feel a strange affection coming on... Joking, Demi.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0183.jpg[/img]

Demi complains of excessive similarity between balloons and sailors!

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0194.jpg[/img]

Oh! Oh! A "Perfect Storm" re-enactment, Demi?

 

Demi, bereaved my the death of his idol, resorts to moonlight card-sharking.

 

http://fineartamerica.com/images-medium/michael-jackson-sad-clown-david-devries.jpg[/img]

Oh, for the sweet smell of... A clown.

 

The latest statement from our leading experts on tactics (last statement - "Irrational regimes with nuclear missiles. Not a good combination") reads "Killer ants and innocent-looking forest roads. Not a good combination"

 

Run, little child! Run!

 

http://www.allthepages.org/photoblog/images/white_jellyfish-mar06.jpg[/img]

Demi scared of protozoans? Oh. Jellyfish.

 

Demi's cabal, described (exaggeratedly) as the "Musical Munchies" set out to rid the world of its most popular pop-idol: Gordon Brown.

 

 

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The cabal choose their target.

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0231.jpg[/img]

Demi: I can fly!

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0232.jpg[/img]

Headlines: "Devil" Clown Humiliated After "Tumbling" Becomes Tumble!

 

 

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b277/The_Demigod2790/IMG_0215.jpg[/img]

Tonight we dine on pancakes! No, Demi, you don't. I do, though.

 

[Demi! All above were jokes and not intended to cause offence!]

[Canukistani]

[Demi! All above were jokes and not intended to cause offence!]

 

I find this statement offensive.

[Dunbar]

Me too!

 

>.>