Dark and Evil Minions!

[Moon Sedai]

So, I found this application form online and thought I'd share it. 

I share this along with the question "What do you look for in a good minion?"

 

 

Please answer each question as honestly as possible. You may answer in either blue ink, black ink or your own blood.

1: Name:
2: REAL Name:
3: Age:
4: Gender:
5: Nationality (if alien please state home planet):
6: Race (if not human please state race/species):
7: Metahuman powers (if any):
8: Do you or have you ever had a hunchback? (We do not disqualify for handicaps):
9: What do you fear? (list any and all fears):
10: Do you now have or have ever had aspirations of being an evil lord in your own right?:
11: Are all your vaccinations current?:
12: What weapons do you own?:
13: What martial arts are you trained in?:
14: If references are asked for, could you provide them without digging up an unmarked grave?:
15: Are you willing to be cannon fodder? (if you don’t know what “cannon fodder” mean, just say yes): _Yes _No
16: Would you enjoy attacking heroes as part of a horde? (that’s a really big group): _ Yes _ No
17: Why did you become an evil minion?:
18: What crimes have you committed?:
19: What crimes do you want to commit?:
20: Can you provide your own minion theme music?:
21: Can you laugh in an evil manner?:
22: You have just captured a hero and tied him up. Your next action would be to?:
23: A superhero is attempting to thwart my plans. What do you do to them?:
24: Arrange the following in order of importance to you:
A: Money
B: Power
C:The death of all who oppose you
__/__/__/

note: there are no wrong answers. Some will get you accepted and some will get you killed, but none are wrong.

 

[LilyElizabeth]

I can't wait until the applications start pouring in. Moon, we could raise Shayol Ghul to a whole new level!

[Panchi]

1: Name: Ahiryeugy'juyi

2: REAL Name: Panchi

3: Age: 2098 years old (Morianinan calender)

4: Gender: F

5: Nationality (if alien please state home planet): ZZKIOTH-27r78

6: Race (if not human please state race/species): Polkodotto

7: Metahuman powers (if any): Flying, laser eyes, telepathy, telekineses, emotion manipulation and controlling any organism's neuro-motor or what constitutes as brain

8: Do you or have you ever had a hunchback? (We do not disqualify for handicaps): No

9: What do you fear? (list any and all fears):The fear of giving out answer to this question

10: Do you now have or have ever had aspirations of being an evil lord in your own right?: Of course, duh. I just want to learn the ropes first

11: Are all your vaccinations current?: I think so...at least updated according to my planet

12: What weapons do you own?:  Magic

13: What martial arts are you trained in?: Hmm...no professional training

14: If references are asked for, could you provide them without digging up an unmarked grave?: Who wants the reference?

15: Are you willing to be cannon fodder? (if you don’t know what “cannon fodder” mean, just say yes): _Yes _No No

16: Would you enjoy attacking heroes as part of a horde? (that’s a really big group): _ Yes _ No No. Alone is so much better

17: Why did you become an evil minion?: Am I one? (Can I blame Barm for this?)

18: What crimes have you committed?: No crimes. Killing and torture aren't really crimes, are they?

19: What crimes do you want to commit?: Clean record. Its better for spying and espionage thingies

20: Can you provide your own minion theme music?: Hmm...can torture someone to do it

21: Can you laugh in an evil manner?: MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA

22: You have just captured a hero and tied him up. Your next action would be to?: Torture them, get information, kill them

23: A superhero is attempting to thwart my plans. What do you do to them?: Capture them, torture them, find all their plans and then present them to you in a very bound state

24: Arrange the following in order of importance to you: B, A, C (C is so much easier if you have A and B)

A: Money

B: Power

C:The death of all who oppose you

[Moon Sedai]

10 points to panchi for being an eager minion.

[Niniel]

1: Name: Tina
2: REAL Name: TinaHel a.k.a Super-Tina! (That is when I wear my cape of human skin.)
3: Age: Older than most trollocs. 
4: Gender: Is that really an important question these days?
5: Nationality (if alien please state home planet): Shayol Ghul. Doh!
6: Race (if not human please state race/species): Myrdraal. 
7: Metahuman powers (if any): Able to disappear in the shadows and return when you least expect it. 
8: Do you or have you ever had a hunchback? (We do not disqualify for handicaps): No. 
9: What do you fear? (list any and all fears): That sword... what was the name? Excalibur? Ice? Dragnipur? Why do humans name their swords? 
10: Do you now have or have ever had aspirations of being an evil lord in your own right?: He, he...
11: Are all your vaccinations current?: Why would I need any?
12: What weapons do you own?: My lovely sword that I have named... 
13: What martial arts are you trained in?: I´m a blade master. 
14: If references are asked for, could you provide them without digging up an unmarked grave?: I´ll refer them to the Dark One.
15: Are you willing to be cannon fodder? (if you don’t know what “cannon fodder” mean, just say yes): _Yes X_No 

16: Would you enjoy attacking heroes as part of a horde? (that’s a really big group): _ Yes  X_ No
17: Why did you become an evil minion?: Something about a game...
18: What crimes have you committed?: I once let a little baby boy run away. It was too cute. 
19: What crimes do you want to commit?: I won´t do it again, I promise!
20: Can you provide your own minion theme music?: I could sing it to you but it might be the last thing you will ever hear. 
21: Can you laugh in an evil manner?: Why would I be loud and noisy? 
22: You have just captured a hero and tied him up. Your next action would be to?: It depends. Is it Ewan McGregor? 
23: A superhero is attempting to thwart my plans. What do you do to them?: It depends. Is it Iain Glen? 
24: Arrange the following in order of importance to you: B, A, C. It´s nice to have people to play with. 
A: Money
B: Power
C:The death of all who oppose you

[Moon Sedai]

and 10 to Tina! Cause she is a great minion

[Niniel]

[Panchi]

That's a mutant not a minion!

[Moon Sedai]

Mutant Minion. 

*whistles teenage mutant ninja turtle theme*
 

[Azeryn]

1: Name: azeryn
2: REAL Name: There are some w call me...Tim
3: Age: The 3rd age
4: Gender: Male last I checked...yep still accurate!
5: Nationality (if alien please state home planet): The Dark Side of the Moon
6: Race (if not human please state race/species): Fendari
7: Metahuman powers (if any): Good old fashioned clean hatred
8: Do you or have you ever had a hunchback? (We do not disqualify for handicaps): Nope
9: What do you fear? (list any and all fears): The only thing to fear is fear itself...that and chainsaw hands!
10: Do you now have or have ever had aspirations of being an evil lord in your own right?: I am an evil lord!
11: Are all your vaccinations current?: Yep..and then some.
12: What weapons do you own?: 80lbs long bow, four swords, 16 knifes, one machete, one mace, my mind!
13: What martial arts are you trained in?: Old fashined trailer park scrappin!
14: If references are asked for, could you provide them without digging up an unmarked grave?: Only a few, but mostly because they were already reannimated by me long ago!
15: Are you willing to be cannon fodder? (if you don’t know what “cannon fodder” mean, just say yes): no, but I can trick plenty of people into being fodder if need be!
16: Would you enjoy attacking heroes as part of a horde? (that’s a really big group): Yes! Especially if the 'hero' has their back to me. Rogues do it from behind!
17: Why did you become an evil minion?: To destroy my master and take their place...err....I mean to advance my masters evil plans.
18: What crimes have you committed?: Murder, sedition, assassination, plotting to overthrow the Crown, rimes against humanity, genocide, fratrecide, and starting a forest fire. (All things I have done in RPing....mostly at a larp)
19: What crimes do you want to commit?: cruelty to animals, and by animals I mean anyone not part of team evil!
20: Can you provide your own minion theme music?: Yep! But it will change frequently due to my chaotic nature
21: Can you laugh in an evil manner?: Oh yes, both bass filled evil laugh to high pitched maniacal joker laugh!
22: You have just captured a hero and tied him up. Your next action would be to?: Force feed them nothing but vegemite for three days.
23: A superhero is attempting to thwart my plans. What do you do to them?: I would convince there sidekick to betray them...that or...chainsaw hands!
24: Arrange the following in order of importance to you:
A: Money
B: Power
C:The death of all who oppose you
C/B/A/

[Moon Sedai]

10 to the new minion Azeryn!