Loraine Sedai, Kynwric, Thera and the Merry Band of Trainees Finish a Trip

[Quisalas Selene]

As Jasine rode through the gate from New Caemlyn to Low Caemlyn, he thought about the last time he left through this gate.  He'd been galloping hard after the merchant who had tried to take Selene away, and the sword at his side had never been used to draw blood.  He wondered if he would ever be able to think of Caemlyn without associating it to the bloodshed that he had been forced into, but if anything could do it, this group of people could.  He nodded his head respectfully to the guard that stood on watching the party leave and heeled Brownie into picking up a trot.  He drew level with Master Kynwric and spoke softly.

 

"Thank you for letting me visit my parents.  They're just on this side of Four Kings, so we'll get to them before we get to the city."  Kynwric nodded and motioned for the boy to continue on and as they came out of Low Caemlyn, he and Thera both broke away from the rest of the group to do some scouting.  It was different riding through the woods and wild between Tar Valon and Caemlyn, there really shouldn't be any organized activity against them on the road, but it was better to be safe.  Thera spent some time working with Jasine and explaining to him what a scout should look for, how to make sure you didn't lose track of the group while scouting, and continuing Jasine's education as always.  The ride to Four Kings proved to be uneventful, but as the sights became increasingly familiar for him, Jasine found himself anything but bored with the calm trip.  He saw the large tree he used to climb and then jump off of the branches into the pond below.  When they came to the road that took off towards the north, Jasine drew rein.

 

"This is it, at the end of this road is my parents' farm and the place where I was raised."  He smiled tenderly at Thera, alone enough to not having to hedge his words or hide his affection.  "I'd like you to meet them.  And I'd like them to meet you."  Under his breath, almost inaudible, he added, "I just hope they're all there to meet."  The rest of the party was to continue on to Four Kings and secure rooms at one of the Inns, and then she would join Jasine at his parents' house.  If, Light forbid, one of Jasine's sisters was missing, Jasine would bring his family with him when he and Thera joined up with the party in Four Kings.

 

As they turned up the road, either Brownie knew where they were going or he had just picked up on his rider's excitement.  The usually sedate animal had his ears pricked up high and fairly danced on his toes as they traveled.  Jasine didn't know if he was eager to get there or dreaded finding out for sure, he just knew that he couldn't delay it any more.  He gave Brownie his head and tucked his heels into the gelding's sides and the horse sprang forward at a canter.  What would have taken a person walking an hour was covered in less than ten minutes by the eager mount.  Jasine tended to Brownie only minimally before the door opened and his mother stepped out.  Behind her Jasine could see his sister Cairlyn, but not Lasael.  Jasine stepped towards her, leaving the horse's reins to drop to the ground without a thought.

 

"Mum... Lasael, where is she?  Is she okay?"

 

Kairyn Al'Thorin looked completely baffled for the first time Jasine could ever remember.  Her brows knit down and she shook her head minutely, unable to respond.  From behind Jasine, Tad Al'Thorin walked up and put a hand on his son's shoulder.  "She's been missing nigh onto two weeks, Jasine.  How did you know?  How did you know to come back to us, boy, and who is this?"

 

Jasine turned to face his dad when he heard his footsteps.  When he asked the question about who he had brought with him, his gaze when to Thera and then back to Tad.  "This is Thera Trakelyn, Da.  She's the Mistress of Trainees at the White Tower and one of the people who have been teaching me to become a Warder. She's... she's also the woman I love."  Jasine flushed with color but held Tad's gaze steadily.  After a long moment Tad gave the tiniest of nods and he looked away from his Da and to Thera.  He smiled briefly to her, he'd hoped this meeting would happen under better circumstances, and then turned back to his mother.  "Mum, you have to come with us into town.  There's an Aes Sedai with us who is going to try to find Lasael.  She's not the only girl who has gone missing."  He held his tongue about the White Cloak involvement, that was for Loraine Sedai to explain. "Loraine Seddai will need to talk to you about when Lasael was last seen and where.  We're going to try to get her back."  He stood a little straighter when he said the word 'we' and was determined to do all he could to see that this went safely.

 

As Jasine's dad called him to help get the cart ready, Jase gave Thera an apologetic smile and then left her alone with his mother and sister.  Kairyn still seemed to be weighing the girl, judging whether or not she was going to like the woman.  Cairlyn had taken an initial liking to the woman, though.  Kairyn pursed her lips and then smoothed them into a smile. "Wish we could meet under different circumstances, Miss Trakelyn, but welcome to my home.  Cairlyn, go fetch our cloaks so we can head into town."  Cairlyn dashed off into the house more like a girl of 10 than a woman of her twenties, and Thera and Kairyn were left alone.

[U4ea]

Loraine's fingers curled tightly around the reins, but she hardly noticed it. Helpless she muttered to herself. She'd said it often since feeling the white cloaks fingers curling around her arm. She could count on one hand the number of times she'd felt helpless in her life, they were curses she'd born with disdain, fighting to keep her demeanor from suffering for her inability to control a situation. They could've been hurt, she muttered in her thoughts. In her head she knew these trainees needed the experience of killing, needed the experience of dealing with their skills, of protecting someone and of taking the risk that they wouldn't get up when someone knocked them down. Her head knew these things. Her heart, on the other hand, sobbed with the mere thought of it. Why did she have to be the one to see that innocence stripped away so roughly?

 

She kept it all bottled up, fighting the urge to scream about the unfairness of it all. Unfair or not, the Last Battle was coming and their success rested on the backs of these trainees and the Aes Sedai they'd someday bond. It would be a great disservice if they weren't ready for it.

 

It didn't make it easy for her to watch, though. She sighed, glad when Kynwric raised his hand for a break. She let him take her horse and found a space away from everyone else. She needed to get rid of some of the anger, some of the frustration. It would help practice her weaves, too. The Light only knew when she'd need these things again. She sat on the ground, not caring about dirt and grass in the small clearing they'd stopped in. She reached for saidar letting the flow of it through her limb provide some level of calm. She opened her eyes and let the weaves fly. She drove a thick weave of Earth and Fire into the ground, pushing roughly until a mound appeared before her, the Fire hardening the dirt into rock. She practiced one weave at a time, slipping Air Razors together until the surface of the rock was cut a few hundred times. Earth Grenades molded before her eyes and she practiced her aim until she could hit the spot she was aiming for three times before she blinked. A Fire roared, unchecked and smokeless to the right of the rock and was doused heavily with water before she cut a deep gully out of the ground with Air and shoved the rock over to rest inside it.

 

Sweat rolled down the side of her face and she blinked it out of her eyes, but didn't stop the weaves from forming. Once she'd made it through her deadly list of weaves she closed her eyes, feeling the clearing, feeling the Spirit touching the trainees and Kynwric behind her, and knowing where her targets lay. She curled weaves, holding as many different ones as she could at one time and pounded the downed rock with them all. Dirt exploded, thunderous booms rocked the ground and finally silence prevailed. She took a calming breath, the slight exhaustion slumping her shoulders until all that was left was her determination. She'd see them safe, she'd not feel helpless again, and she'd find those girls. If it meant using the weaves she hadn't touched since she and Kyn had disappeared twenty years ago, she'd do it.

 

She opened her eyes slowly and pushed herself to her feet, cleaning up her mess before returning to the others. She avoided their cautious gazes, didn't think she could bear to see the shock or fear in their eyes. She took a drink of water, only raising her eyes to Kyn's and knowing he'd understand her need. He'd gotten used to her temper tantrums long ago. In hindsight, that's exactly what this felt like. A temper tantrum...

[Eqwina]

The discussion to allow Jasine to see his parents had tied Thera’s stomach in knots. She had sat at the table arguing his right, not knowing if she wanted to win. Finally with no good argument against they all had agreed.

 

As they rode out of Caemlyn’s gates she could not help but look back at the shrinking city. The White Tower was her home now, but a part of her would always be tied to her place of birth. In the turmoil of their trip she’d not even taken time to look in on her brothers, even 12 years later the pain of her father’s death was still to real. Before her childhood completely faded behind her, Thera and Jasine broke away from the group and began to scout ahead. In an attempt to ignore her nerves she began to lecture on the art of scouting; the teaching helping to distract from thoughts of reaching another milestone in her life. Drawing reign next to Jasine she studied the landscape gathering a feeling for where he had grown up.

 

"This is it, at the end of this road is my parents' farm and the place where I was raised."

 

Thera’s hands tightened on her reigns and her horse frisked a few steps before she could rein him in. “I would like that as well Jasine” It was not a lie, but still far from the truth. Never had any of her relationships reached the point where she felt meeting her family was the next course of action; not even with Serena. Now she sat just a few minutes ride from another first in her life. Turning to study Jasine as he watched eagerly ahead, straining for the first glimpse of his home, Thera realized that if her father was alive she would want him to know Jasine. Did that mean it was true love? With her fears of their love put to rest more bubbled up in its place. What if his mother couldn’t accept that her son was in love with a warrior? With his teacher? Tangled up in her fears it took Thera a moment to realize that Jasine was almost out of sight ahead. Leaning low in her saddle she urged the BlueRose for more speed and was at his side as the house came into view.

 

Dropping to the ground beside her stallion Thera tended to her mount, but was already standing when the door opened. Her breath caught in her throat and her hands tightened into fists at her first sight of Jasine’s mother.

 

"Mum... Lasael, where is she?  Is she okay?"

 

Oh Light! So wrapped up in her own fears Thera had forgotten that his sister could be the girl in trouble. Acting on instinct she took a protective step towards her love and laid a concerned hand on his arm. At his fathers words she jumped as if goosed and her face flushed to match her hair. "This is Thera Trakelyn, Da.  She's the Mistress of Trainees at the White Tower and one of the people who have been teaching me to become a Warder. She's... she's also the woman I love."

 

A shaky smile appeared on Thera’s face and she tried to appear confident and sure, but if his father did not see through her rouse, there was no doubt that his mother did. Even Jasine seemed to be fooled by her attempts, and she soon found herself alone face to face with Kairyn Al'Thorin.

“I thank you for your kind welcome Mistress Al’Thorin. It was wise that you decided to accompany us, and I give you my promise that I will do everything in my power to bring Lasael home safe. Jasine has spoken so often of all of you that I feel as if I know you, and I would hate to lose a sister before she was ever gained.”

 

Unaccustomed to being nervous Thera’s mouth had run away from her head. “What I mean to say is that when Jasine and I marry….I mean if…..that is to say….um..” Clamping her mouth shut with a click Thera stared at Kairyn as she would have a wild bore. A mother’s anger was far worse than any other that could be incurred. “I am sorry if I was t-to forward Mistress Kairyn. I-It is only that I l-love your son so much, I often find that my heart has run away with my head. I swear I meant no disrespect” Dropping her eyes to the dirt in front of her toes Thera began to mentally curse the day her father had first kissed her mother. Of all the fool things to blurt out!  She was a woman of power and influence, both in the Tower and in Caemlyn and she was reduced to stammering by a farmers wife.

 

[Jehaine]

Melenis looked alarmed when the first of teh expolosions had gone off in the distance, where Loraine had gone off to, but Kynwric's reaction -- or rather the lack of one -- told her it was nothing to be concerned about. If it had, she didn't doubt the Warder would have run off into the woods with bared steel before she could blink. The initial shock over, she continued to do what she was doing, shaking her head every once in a while for the distractions the explosions provided.

 

Though it had not always been like this, Melenis had spent a couple of years with the Warders now, and had gotten accustomed to watching the Greens train their weaves every once in a while. She could almost guess which weaves Loraine was using based on the type of explosion: a dull blow meant something below ground, probably the mines, whereas louder, sharper ones were probably those grenades they liked so much. After a while, Loraine returned, and she stated her thoughts on the matter.

 

- "Though honing your skills is commendable, i hope we will not be forced to resort to those methods."

 

The tone of her voice spoke of displeasure with the current events. Even in a remote place like this, there was still the chance of someone hearing the explosions and going in to take a closer look. Or, even worse, alert the ones they were trying to track. Additionally, Whitecloaks didn't think too kindly about Aes Sedai if the tavern was an indication, and unless Loraine ended up killing every Whitecloak between here and Amadicia she wanted to keep her ability hidden for as long as possible. Oh, which reminded her.

 

- "Next time, may i suggest something more subtle, like a dome of silence so as not to be overheard, Lady Kilaine??"

 

A dome of Air -- she believed it was Air, anyway -- superimposed on her training ground would eliminate sound, and therefore the chance of being heard five miles off. Though she was a little upset, she hoped putting the emphasis on her alias would help remind the woman that the rumor of an Aes Sedai being in this part of the woods would end up doing them more harm than good. Especially after they lost a couple of men in the Inn several days ago. She wasn't trying to be disrespectful, but it was counterproductive to the mission, and in her opinion she had no choice but to speak up.

 

 

Melenis

Trainee berating an Aes Sedai?

[_Kynwric_]

Kyn watched as Loraine slid off into the woods, he could feel the irritation and pent up energy in her. Not channeling was hard on her, it was like withdrawals for a drunk. He turned his head at the first dull thud off in the distance and felt the slight burst of release over the bond and turned back to caring for the horses. When she returned he listened for just a moment to Melenis' tone and words before speaking to her in a soft voice.

 

"You overstep your bounds trainee, do not for a moment presume that an Aes Sedai does not do what she does for a reason."

 

He stood and turned to face her and slowly walked towards Loraine and past Melenis.

 

"Also do not presume that it is permissible to disrespect an Aes Sedai, even when all seems private."

 

He said the last just as he past the woman by and kept on going to Loraine, locking eyes with her once no one else could see. Although Melenis he thought Melenis had been right, this was not the time for a Illuminators display of power, sometimes it was necessary and he knew if Loraine had kept holding that frustration in it would come to no good later. He could already feel the relaxation seeping through her. Kyn stopped right in front of Loraine and looked down, his eyes having not left her since he passed Melenis and he stared for a moment before nodding to himself. He then turned back to the rest of their group and looked at them for a long moment.

 

"I seem to recall telling you all once that Aes Sedai are people too, yes? So, all the stress we've been under recently, have you not been training in the evenings to relieve it? Have you not been doing more strenuous things to help wear you out?" His temper was up now and he wasn't about to let go of the slight that had been proffered.

 

"Well, have you seen her" pointing at Loraine "doing anything to relieve that tension? No you say?" He took another long hard look about. "What an Aes Sedai does to relieve tension is weave the One Power, practice her art just as we practice ours. What happens when you don't practice? You get rusty, your reactions slow, you may make a mistake because you are not at peak form. The same goes for someone who Channels, they must practice... you think it is coincidence it takes 20 or more years to reach the shawl? No, it is because they must practice, and practice to the point that there are no errors, for a simple error in using the one power can break the world." He emphasized the last three words. Lowering his voice again, his gaze hard and cold.

 

"Perhaps it is time you learned what a fully trained Sister of the Battle Ajah can do."

[Sieve]

With all his chores complete Perivar walked off to the edge of their camp just into the woods.  He had spoken with Master Kynwric before leaving the inn about his fool stunt.  The conversation was brief but after he explained himself and his actions Master Kynwric agreed with him on a punishment.  His honor demanded that he answer for his actions yet Master Kynwric's concerns were more for the Tower.  As a Tower Guard and future Warder Perivar could not fall victim to his emotions like he had that night.  So for the remainder of the trip Perivar would assume extra duties.  When they returned to Tar Valon he would be at Master Kynwric's disposal.  He would train longer and harder as well as take on occasional chores or tasks.  The last was the one that really hit home, Perivar would not be allowed to accept a bond until Master Kynwric deemed him fit.  On top of that they would talk in greater detail when they returned.  For now Perivar had to perform his duties to the letter, no slack would be given.  If he failed to do so then he would not be graduating with the others.

 

He formed the flame pushing all his emotions into it bringing on the precious void that made all his emotions seem distant.  At one time he refused to form it wanting to absorb them all yet now he found himself using it all too often.  Perivar could not stand to be alone a moment with his thoughts so he decided to practice his forms.  

 

Unfolding the fan he assumed the guard position Lion on the Hill.  He sat there a moment, the sword was an extension of his body.  He saw the oak and letherleaf trees clearer, he could see the fine detail of every leaf.  Birds on the branches, a squirrel feasting on a nut.  He was one with his surroundings.  

 

Perivar began with the basic forms then moved on to the intermediate forms.  He began to work himself into a sweat though in the void he hardly noticed.  He was mid swing when he heard the first rumble.  He stopped and looked toward the camp then another round of explosions sounded on the other side of the camp.  Perivar ran back to the camp though nobody seemed to be paying it any mind.  A quick study showed that everyone was accounted for except for Loraine Sedai.  Master Kynwric was going about his business unconcerned so obviously everything was alright.

 

Perivar was curious so he walked until he caught sight of her.  He was amazed by what he saw.  He could not see exactly what she was doing but he saw the results.  Light she would be worth a hundred soldiers or more by herself.  Perivar was in awe of her ability.  For someone who spent two years in Tar Valon he had never seen this.  Perivar kept his distance as she returned then followed behind her.  Was he more curious about her use of the power or was he being over protective of her.  He decided it was both.

 

He arrived shortly after her and caught the Melenis's comments.  Whistling through his teeth he decided that now was a good time to check his equipment.  Light what was Melenis thinking taking that tone with an Aes Sedai.  Whatever our mission she obviously had her reasons for what she was doing.  He decided to start working on his sword to stay out of the discussion.  He took out his whetstone and oiled cloth then began tending to his sword waiting for the eruption that would put Melenis in her place though it was Master Kynwric who spoke first.  Perhaps now would be a good time to do a circuit around the camp though he did not want to draw any attention to himself. 

[Jehaine]

Melenis waited for Kynwric to finish speaking, meeting his gaze with a look of her own. While she understood the importance of training, and the need to relieve tension, that wasn't what she had intended to comment on. Waiting a few seconds later, she replied to the Warder, explaining what she had meant.

 

- "You misunderstand, Kynwric. I am not complaining about her training her weaves, i am complaining at said training being heard for miles. I never said she should not hone her skills, relieve tension or whatnot."

 

She paused a second, forming the follow-up in her mind. The pause was not long enough to let Kynwric speak yet though, she was not yet done with her explanation. Looking around, she checked how far Loraine was from her before lowering her voice. Chances were she'd still overhear, but she didn't want to be too obvious about it to the others if she could help it.

 

- "I even suggested that the next time she train, she might want to use a dome of air to lessen, if not remove the sound of explosions altogether. I meant no disrespect, far from it, but for the success of our mission alerting everyone to our presence may not be the best thing."

[Sieve]

As Master Kynwric and Melenis resumed their discussion Perivar took the opportunity to speak to Loraine Sedai.  He approached her cautiously unsure of her thoughts at the moment.  Melenis's words had been harsh and he did not want her anger directed at him.

 

He spoke only for her ears so he offered her the honorific, not that it matteredas anyone within a ten mile range would be able to put the puzzle together.  "Loraine Sedai, I am sorry for watching you...practice."  He was not sure if that was the right word but it seemed to fit.  "Well when I heard the commotion I couldn't help but check.  With all that has gone on I didn't want to take any chances."  He blushed thinking how much of a fool he must have looked.  She could protect herself better than anyone here yet he was still trying to protect her.  "Anyway I have never seen the power used like that.  I am ignorant about its use in general though seeing what you just did, you would be most welcome when the Shadowspawn come pouring out of the Blight.  I mean from what I saw you alone are worth more than a score of veteran soldiers, perhaps much more than that."  He thought for a moment.

 

"If I may ask, do all Aes Sedai learn those weaves or just the Green Ajah?  What does it mean to be a member of the Green Ajah?"  He thought of Kabria.  She had told him of her interest in joining the Green Ajah though he did not know what it truly meant.  Would she be able to do that? 

[_Kynwric_]

"You misunderstand, Kynwric. I am not complaining about her training her weaves, i am complaining at said training being heard for miles. I never said she should not hone her skills, relieve tension or whatnot. I even suggested that the next time she train, she might want to use a dome of air to lessen, if not remove the sound of explosions altogether. I meant no disrespect, far from it, but for the success of our mission alerting everyone to our presence may not be the best thing."

 

Kynwric shook his head, "No Melenis, it is you who is not understanding. It is never, ever the place of a Warder, let alone a Trainee or Tower Guard, to speak down to a Sister in anything while in public. How I behave with Loraine is between myself and her, and I am afraid that I have let my own familiarity with my bonded show far too often to be of good example to those set upon this path." He shook his head and took a deep breath. "Remember, you are not Tower Guard yet, you cannot under any circumstances speak to a Sister in that fashion until you are, and probably not then. Aes Sedai are used to having their way and treating them otherwise often has dire consequences."

[U4ea]

Loraine flinched at Melenis's comments, but avoided responding. Kynwric seemed mad enough to do that for her, at any rate. She was too tired and she was seriously afraid she might say something overly harsh. If she wasn't a typical Aes Sedai, Melenis would soon run into one who wouldn't take too kindly to be spoken to that way. Bonded or not.

 

She settled far enough away that she couldn't hear them, truly didn't want to hear them. She looked up as she heard her name. She smiled at Perivar, but didn't rise to meet him. "Please, have a seat and we'll talk." She smiled and motioned next to her and waited until he sat down before she continued. "Being Aes Sedai is complicated, there are a lot of things we spend decades learning. Nothing you just watched me do is any of those things. They are known only to the Green Ajah, not even our Warders truly know them all. Kyn probably couldn't tell you a single thing I just threw together, only that when it starts flying, it's time to back up." She smiled, shaking her head. "As for what it means to be a Green, it's pretty simple, really. We are the Ajah of sacrifice. We train and hone our skills, we learn weapons and how to turn saidar into a weapon to defend and protect the people of this world. We stand ready for the Last Battle and vow from the day we gain the shawl to thwart the Dark One and his minions, to chase them and their Dark Friends back to the hell they've created with their hatred and lust for power. It makes us a target, in the worst possible way."

 

She looked at Perivar again, her smile slipping. His curiosity could only mean he'd pegged the Greens as a place to find a bond holder. Most trainees did, after all. The Greens saw more action in the ways these trainees were trained than most of the other Ajahs. It was their creed, after all. "We spend years patrolling the Blight, reading reports and chasing down leads to hunt Forsaken and any other hint of the Dark One touching the world. For that reason, some Greens have many warders. It becomes a small army for those who go into battle regularly. We're not perfect, we're not infallible. Worse still, I don't remember the last Green who died peacefully of old age. Ours is a rough life, a hard path. Our Warders are what keep us alive." She smiled. "Don't look so shocked, dear. If not for that man behind me, I'd have been dead years ago. I can't see everything, I can't hear everything. There are places I go where my ability to channel is pointless. I have to rely on my blades and my warder. I don't carry the sword because it's pretty, Perivar."

 

She stopped and shook her head. "I'm rambling, I apologize. I'm sure I only managed to create more questions for you. Anyting else I can answer?"

 

 

[Sieve]

Her smile was uplifting.  He just sat there listening as she spoke in that soothing voice.  It was comforting that she spoke with him at all.  Her cool Aes Sedai serenity that made him feel as if all was well in the world.  He was in awe of her.  He had the utmost respect for her. 

 

Perivar's look of amazement had to be plain on his face.  He had not expected the answers that she gave.  She must trust him to be so open with him.  He would not betray her trust, ever.  The events at the inn still bothered him though if she took any issue with it then she did not mention it.  He soaked it all in, he wanted to know as much about Kabria and her future as he could find out.  He needed to know if he was to properly serve her.

 

Some of what she told him was certainly a shock though the more she explained the Green Ajah the more he knew that would be his preference.  Kabria had told him of her interest in the Green and he hoped that was the way her decision would go.  It seemed like the perfect fit for both of them.

 

Perivar could not believe that she needed help defending herself.  Even at the inn he knew she would not use the power except as a last resort.  There was a reason that she hadn't, certainly she was in fear of her life but that was for her to know.  It was none of his business why she did what she did.  He knew Master Kynwric's worth though he was certain that she was quite capable of taking care of herself.  There was something about her that said she was much stronger than she let on.  She had that same passion and drive that he had noticed in Kabria.  He could not help but be in awe of her.

 

"No please don't apologize.  Whether you know it or not you have answered far more questions than you can imagine.  You have given me more than I deserve.  When the time comes I would very much like to be bonded to an Aes Sedai of the Green Ajah."

 

He realized that she was sweating, she seemed tired.  "I'm sorry to bother you.  You look like you need some rest.  Can I get you anything before I go?"

 

[U4ea]

Loraine smiled. "Go where your heart takes you, Perivar. Don't hunt an Aes Sedai based on the color of her shawl. You'll never find what you what in your bond that way. I do believe that you're more than equiped to handle a Green, though." She paused and lowered her head a moment.

 

"I do owe you an apology, though. I'm sorry I couldn't Heal your wound." Her voice was little more than a whisper and she raised her eyes back to his. "One thing I pray you all learn before you find an Aes Sedai on your hands is that not all of us have the talents that we're touted to have. Awe inspiring abilities to destroy and mend..." She laughed derisively and shook her head again. "I can tear a building down, brick by brick, without lifting a finger. I can mow a line in an advancing army wide enough that half the soliders in Fal Dara could get through. I can kill, when I need to, to protect someone I love. What I can't do is Heal wounds. No matter how badly I want to, no amount of skill I possess will Heal more than a minor rash or a scratch. The silliest surface wound is beyond me." She looked away, focusing on watching the line of horses a moment to control her anger. She didn't have the energy for that. "I am sorry I couldn't Heal you. When I said we'd talk about failures..." She looked back at him, fixing her gaze on his. "That is my failure, and it's one that has haunted me since the day I walked into the Tower. It will haunt me until the day I die. That is the nature of failures, I believe."

[Quisalas Selene]

"My, aren't we a chatty young thing?  You remind me of my Selene a little bit." Kairyn let a smile warm her expression for a moment. "Though my little 'Ene never took a fancy to swords, Light be thanked.  You train the children at the Tower, then?  You're a warder bonded to another woman?" Kairyn had been to the Tower and knew a little something about how things worked there.  Her single arched brow as she spoke could be a sign of displeasure or it could have just been curiosity.  "What will you do with my boy if your woman asked you to go off on an adventure with her? No, no, don't give your answers to me, lass, just keep the question in mind.

"If you mean to marry my boy that's mostly between you and him.  I'm proud of what he's becoming, and if you've had a hand in that, then I've you to thank.  Thank you, Mistress Trakelyn.  The boy looks happy and healthy and there's a deadly sort of grace in how he walks now.  I know he'll serve the Light, and if he's pledged you his heart, he'll serve you well too.  So long as you serve him well too."  She looked off to the barn where her only son was working with the horses as if he'd never left.   

 

"There's Cairlyn with the cloaks, let's go see how the boys are coming with the cart.  Will you be riding into town with us on the cart or on your horses?  I dare say Brownie looks like Jase galloped him most of the way from Tar Valon itself."  Brownie, of course, looked no such thing and the brief run had done little more than work up a sweat that was cooling in the breeze as the horse cropped at grass messily through his bit.  Kairyn gathered up the horse's reins and with a whispered word had the gelding plodding after her as they walked to the barn.  They got there just as Tad and Jasine came out with the cart attached to a stout gelding that looked half asleep. 

 

Jasine left the horse in his dad's hands and trotted over to join his mother and Thera.  He took one look at Thera and blanched a bit, maybe leaving her with the girls wasn't the best idea.  She looked nervous and flustered and a bit flushed.  He wrapped his arms around his mother and lifted her clean off her feet, eliciting a startled squeak and then a full-bodied laugh from the formerly dignified woman.  She boxed his shoulder lightly and then when Jasine set her down, she smiled fondly before kissing his cheek.  "Be nice to her, Mum.  She's the only woman I ever met who could be as scary and as loving as you." He released her and linked hands with Thera, a questioning glance given to his love.  He hoped all had went well between the two women.

 

Tad al'Thorin waved his family and Thera over to the cart.  "If your friends haven't found lodging in Four Kings by the time we get there, I'll talk to Mistress Aree about getting rooms at the Red Lion."  He gave his wife a long stare, and something silent passed between them before he turned and gave another nod to Thera and a smile.  "Come along, then.  We need to see if your little group is any better at finding my Lasael than the town watch has been."

[Jehaine]

Kynwric shook his head, "No Melenis, it is you who is not understanding. It is never, ever the place of a Warder, let alone a Trainee or Tower Guard, to speak down to a Sister in anything while in public. How I behave with Loraine is between myself and her, and I am afraid that I have let my own familiarity with my bonded show far too often to be of good example to those set upon this path." He shook his head and took a deep breath. "Remember, you are not Tower Guard yet, you cannot under any circumstances speak to a Sister in that fashion until you are, and probably not then. Aes Sedai are used to having their way and treating them otherwise often has dire consequences."

 

- "But... Kynwric, for the past few years training in the Tower, whenever i did something wrong there'd be someone to point out the flaw to me so that i could fix it. Loraine made a mistake there, yet if no one points it out to her, how can she be expected to improve?"

 

Melenis was confused. Her grandfather, the Warders at the Tower... All of them had helped her to improve, to even out her flaws by pointing them out to her. Most of the time they talked in the same way she just did to Loraine. She knew no other way to say such things, how could they be wrong?

 

- "I mean... i acted in her best interests. She's this tense now, imagine what would happen if one of us came down with something worse than a stab in the leg? Would she manage to Heal us in time? We're far away from the thirty years of experience you have, we've barely seen our first actual combat a day or so ago! She'd have torn herself apart if one of us had... died. Great Lord of the Light, she'd have blamed it all on herself!"

 

She looked back at the direction Loraine had gone off to, but couldn't see her. Perhaps that was for teh better, if Kynwric's reaction was an indication she doubted Loraine would be feeling much better. Still, the image of the Inn haunted her, it was as if she could feel the eyes upon her again of those relying on her for safety. It was in that moment, with her watching the door intently, that she felt what it must have been for Loraine, Kynwric and Thera to bring them along. Though she was never in any real danger, the pressure was something she felt wouldn't be any less had she been in the actual fight itself.

 

- "I mean, the Whitecloaks have a botched kidnapping, two dead, two captured. After their target's missing, they'll have all the more reason to start looking for us. One rumor, even one from a traveller talking about 'hearing thunder under a cloudless sky' and they'll put two and two together, especially after their survivors report back to them. They'd be waiting for us, if not attack us directly, and you know you can't hold off all of them on your own. We're Trainees, Kynwric, not ta'veren. As soon as the fighting gets serious, we're liabilities, being only average fighters at best."

 

- "Back in that Inn, i got a helping of the pressure that must be on your shoulders, realising i was the only one between a bar brawl and some twenty defenseless girls. I was so nervous i almost ran Thera through before i realised it was her! That's why i'm desperate to avoid unnecessary exposure like this. Give me a penance if you want, but burn me if i don't want to be alive to fulfill it. I just... want us all to make it out of there alive, kidnapped girls included."

 

 

Melenis

Worried

[_Kynwric_]

Kynwric smiled and shook his head. "Firstly, are you positive she made a mistake?" He paused a moment not expecting an answer. "Secondly, Trainees, Tower Guard and Warders can make mistakes, can be wrong, can even be pigheadedly stubborn. Aes Sedai are never any of those things, especially in public. Loraine is Aes Sedai, which makes her as much as a Queen in most situations. You do not speak to Queens as if you were sleeping in a tent with them, even when you are. Unless of course you are the Queens consort."

 

He gestured for Melenis to sit down, seeing now he needed to explain. "I know she is tense, and believe me when I say that we've been through worse. She would have managed much as we have managed before. You all may be far away from my experience, you are competent or you would not be here. And while I am certain Loraine would blame herself if something happend to any of you, and blame me as well, we still would have moved forward. I know it sounds cold to you Melenis, but I have seen men who I spent years training with die at my feet and so has she. It is not an easy life, it is sometimes a very unpleasant life. Some of us make it through by drinking, some of us by loving, some of us don't make it through at all."

 

He sighed, leaving out any reference to healing, knowing it was subject best left alone for now. "Getting out of it alive is the idea, but not without completing the mission. Are you asking if I will sacrifice to complete the mission? If so, then the answer is yes. If we find one girl who becomes Aes Sedai then my death, yours, Thera's and every other man here will have more than paid for. There is one life here worth more to me than that of a future Aes Sedai. This is the life Melenis, it is about sacrifice, it is about giving of yourself until you can give no more, it is about doing what needs to be done. Not what you want to do, but what needs to be done."

 

He shrugged his shoulders. "As for what Loraine did, she did it because she needed the release, she needed the practice and I didn't say anything about it because I wanted the bait. Right now I am taking a calculated risk to bring what we are looking for to us instead of wasting valuable time looking for them. If I am right we'll have a scout looking in on us tonight and we'll be able to track the scout to where we need to go."

 

He had been speaking in a softer voice, letting his hostility drain away having realized that Melenis was simply doing what she thought was best. "And you are selling yourself and all your fellow trainees here short. You are good swordsmen, better than most men could ever hope to be. My goal is to now get you the experience you need to be good Warders, that and get us all back to the Tower alive."

 

He stood up and then paused and looked down at Melenis, "Also, I don't give penances when someone was trying to do the right thing and di it poorly. Only when you are being repetitively stupid... and you are not repetitively stupid."

[Eqwina]

Thera stared slightly taken back by the blunt honesty the woman shared. She found herself wanting to promise that her son would always be first in her life, but all that she could say was that he was first in her heart. “I love him more than words can say and I will do everything in my power to make sure he is happy and that he and I can stay together….”

 

"There's Cairlyn with the cloaks, let's go see how the boys are coming with the cart.  Will you be riding into town with us on the cart or on your horses?  I dare say Brownie looks like Jase galloped him most of the way from Tar Valon itself."

 

Smiling just slightly Thera smiled nervously. “He does look a little rough at that and I am sure BlueRose would enjoy the rest. I think we’ll ride in the cart with you if you don’t mind, and Mistress Kairyn, please call me Thera.” She felt as if some barrier had been broken and yet she was still scared of the woman to whom she might one day be kin. When Jasine’s hand found hers she squeezed it for all she was worth. Hoping that they would think well of her. Perhaps if she could find Lasael it would cement her as someone wonderful in their minds.

 

Climbing into the back of their cart she gave Jasine’s dad a grateful smile for his hand. She had not needed it of course, but it was a sign of his acceptance..she hoped.

 

[Jehaine]

Melenis sat down as she was told, letting Kynwric explain to her how the relationship between an Aes Sedai and her Warder was like. With only the Bond between Loraine and Kynwric to go by, she figured it would be one between equals. True, the Aes Sedai would be the one with the final call in case of disagreements, but that was still a fair bit away from the Queen and subordinate the Warder was telling her about now.

 

- "I know, the mission comes before everything. And yes, i'd willingly get myself left behind if that would help the chances of successfully getting away. It's just that the lack of experience is getting on my nerves, too many variables and unknowns to be able to decently plan ahead. For example, i have no clue how i'm going to react if we take a casualty. No way to prepare, no way to anticipate and, most importantly, no way to deal with it. I hate winging it, i try to get at least a few backup plans sorted out before starting. But all of this is just... too many unknowns, too many variables for me to factor it in."

 

She blushed slightly at the unexpected praise, moreso because Kyn had been angry at her earlier. She took failure as an attack on her competence, and to have offended an Aes Sedai, even if it had been unintentional, was certainly not what she had had in mind when she commented on her training. She hadn't even considered it might have been intentional!

 

- "Umm... Kynwric? Since i was angry at the time, and more than a little tense for half expecting a Whitecloak army to come charging out at us... Think i should apologise to Loraine, or would that make things worse at the moment?"

 

Not really used to dealing with human emotions, she waited for Kynwric to answer. Not in the least because the Warder's experience with Loraine as a person went back at least thirty years as well. She didn't know the woman's character in situations like this, much less be familiar with dealing with having to take their feelings into consideration, but she wasn't about to give up for lack of trying. That this required another approach than the one between student and teacher she was familiar with was a small setback, but one she didn't intend to alow herself to be hindered by.

 

 

Melenis

Wondering what to do now

[Sieve]

Perivar simply nodded when she gave him advice about choosing the Aes Sedai with whimhe would share the bond.  He had already gone against all of her advice though he could not tell her that he had already promised his bond to an Accepted.

 

What she said next shocked him, if he could have found the breath to speak he would have cut her off but he could not.  She was sorry, she was apologizing to him.  For what?  He was the fool who got injured.  Light she can't place the blame on herself. 

 

"Your sorry!  Why?  You cannot blame yourself for my foolish actions.  I am the one who should apologize.  I should have been there sooner.  I have no idea how I did not see it sooner.  It was my fault, you trusted us to be there for you and I failed.  I should have been there."  He shook his head, his belled braids jingling.

 

"You cannot blame yourself for something beyond your control.  I was the one who let my emotions get the best of me.  I don't regret what I did back there only how I did it.  I did not seek the void like I have been trained to do.  I could have seriously hindered our mission from my stupidity.  Master Kynwric saw it for what it was, he knew and we have spoken of my poor judgement.  You should not have had to worry about me because I should have done as I was trained.  I could have bested him easily if only I did as I was trained.  Instead I let the emotions consume me.  I refused to form the void because I wanted to feel the emotions.  It was like I was a child again, that is how I used to do it back home.  I used to let the emotions fuel me though I am not a child anymore.  I should not have fallen victim to my emotions like that.  I swear that I will not let it happen again." He felt foolish, he did not want to explain all the emotions that he felt or the reasons for them.

 

"You cannot think of your inability to heal with the power as a failure.  Do you have any idea that your presence by my side and your soothing voice healed me more that night than any weave you could have laid upon me.  I was spent, I was teetering on the edge of madness.  I thought his death would make it all go away yet it did not.  After I realized that it wouldn't I was lost.  It was your voice, your concern for me that allowed me to hold it together.  I failed you and the others yet you would not hear of it, you were the glue that held me together.  It was not the one power but you who gave me the strength I needed.  So you cannot say that you failed to heal me.  You healed me though you didn't realize it." 

[_Kynwric_]

Kyn looked at Melenis and nodded. "I think I know why you did what you did, you have gotten more of a look at what it is like to be bonded to an Aes Sedai than many trainees do. Unfortunately, you have gotten a look at how Loraine and I behave within the bounds of our bond and I am afraid that we may not be typical. You also have to be aware of how the outside world views Aes Sedai and how to behave then as well as within small social groups like this. It is a whole special social structure unto itself and remember that while Thera and Bryon are members of the Tower Guard and have earned the respect given them, the least of Aes Sedai have the right to command them.

 

As for apologizing, I think that would be best, and the sooner done the better. You are far more likely to upset my sensibilities than hers. As for the experience, you have to let it come, you can't force yourself into experience. Don't over think, but don't not plan. I know it sounds silly, but you can do as much, maybe more, harm by over thinking a problem as by just letting the solutions work themselves out as you go. Sometimes you cannot plan for every contingency, that is why a Warder has to be flexible and able to make decisions on the fly."

[Jehaine]

Melenis... hesitantly nodded. Being a Warder was very different from what she imagined it would be, it seemed, and she figured she'd need some time to sort everything out for herself given the change of mindset she apparently needed to go through. So far, everything she had done -- including protecting the girls at the Inn -- had been planned out by her in advance. To hear that to be forced to rely on 'winging it' was far from a rare exception was... disturbing to say the least.

 

Thanking Kynwric for the explanation, she stood up before heading in the direction Loraine had gone off to. She could have asked the Warder where his Aes Sedai was, of course, but something told her she needed to look for her herself. Not wanting to go against her gut feeling, she walked around camp, embracing the Void in order to not miss a sign of where she would be, whether by hearing her voice be carried by a gust of wind or simply failing to spot her in the distance.

 

 

Melenis

Looking for Loraine

[_Kynwric_]

Kynwric watched as Melenis did a closed circuit of the camp in looking for Loraine and was a little amused by it, She's methodical and a thinker... I just hope she doesn't think herself to death one day. He supposed that those were the differences between using the Void and the Spring and between Ma'erath and Vadin M'taal.

 

Getting up from where he sat Kynwric headed down the road a short bit to where Thera and Jasine had disappeared. He watched down the path and was thinking about taking a ride in that direction when he heard the clatter of wagon wheels on the road. Stepping off to the side he disappeared into the tress lining the road and began to stalk his way towards the oncoming wagon to investigate who was approaching them.

 

When he was sufficently down the road from their stopping point and where he could easily view the road from cover he stopped, it had only taken a few minutes to run as far as he needed. H watched as the cart rolled into view and shook his head, that man had to be kin to Jasine, no too ways about it. He quickly dashed back to the camp and settled down beside the road to await their coming visitor.

[Quisalas Selene]

Cairlyn al'Thorin had decided to hero-worship Mistress Thera Trakelyn Gaidin.  When all was said and done, Kairyn was going to hve a sharp talk with her daughter lest she lose yet another child to the White Tower.  The whole trip south from the house Cairlyn talked animatedly to Thera about what it was like to swing a sword and go on adventures and, much to Jasine's embarrassment, how it felt to be involved with someone whom you could easily beat up.  Jasine cleared his throat and cut off his older sister nefore Thera could have a chance to reply to that last one.

 

"My relationship with Thera isn't open business among the other people of our group.  I'd appreciate it if you didn't let on to knowing.  I couldn't lie to you all about it, and I wouldn't lie to them if they ever asked outright, but the less they ask, the better.  I'm still a trainee, although not for long, and trainees aren't supposed to be off falling in love when there's training to do."  Tad laughed at this last line and the look he cast his wife brought questions to Jasine's mind that he didn't have the petinence to ask. Kairyn gave Tad another of those looks and then turned her gaze to Thera again, although what she thought of this new information was guarded behind a mix of the unreadable eyes of a mother and the unreadable expression of one who was Tower-trained.  Cairlyn giggled and clasped her hands over her mouth and tried to look incensed.  Jasine sighed and turned back to the two riding horses tethered to the cart and rubbed Brownie's nose.  This could go so wrong so easily.

 

"Jase, boy, are your friends meeting us in Four Kings or is there a camp we need to find?"  Jasine looked back and then chewed his bottom lip a bit as he considered.  They'd made good time to his parents' farm, and they had wasted no time at all in getting ready and leaving for town.  He looked from his Dad to Thera and let the decision fall into her hands. "Do you know if they'd have made Four Kings yet?"

[Eqwina]

It was not precisely an uncomfortable ride, but Thera could not help but feel as if she was being weighed and measured every time Jasine’s mother’s eyes fell upon her. Sensing some of the woman’s unease at having yet another daughter run off to the Tower, she spoke of how hard the life was and how grueling the hours. When it came to questions of she and Jasine..Thera clammed up and could hardly speak. She was all too aware of his mothers and fathers ears whenever that question was brought to light.

 

Smiling gratefully at her love she did managed to add a few sentences after his explanation. “It is true, with him still a trainee he should not even be considering love and as his teacher neither should I, but I assure you doesn’t miss a second of his training.” A slight blush stained her cheeks, but not as crimson as it once would have been. “ Plus…in our lives when you get a chance at true love, only a fool would pass it up.”

 

Jasine’s sister laughed and got a dreamy look in her eyes. Probably picturing a fairytale romance, with no idea how hard their love truly was. Desperately wanting a change of topic Thera commented on how good it was to be back in Andor after so long away from home.

 

Why Jasine looked to her to have the answers Thera did not know. Was it because she was his commander? Or because of their love? Either way it made her smile, the fact that he put so much trust into her skills. “Truly I cannot say my lov…Jasine, but I think it would be best that we go to the Inn straight away and then find out where the rest of our party has gone.”

 

Something just out of sight on the road caught her eye and in a voice that carried Thera called a halt. “I must apologize for causing such a rough stop, but…something tells me that if we head just there” Thera pointed for Jasine’s dad, just off the road “We will find who we search for”

 

Quickly and without thinking Thera gave Jasine a quick kiss, earning a giggle from his sister and a raised eyebrow from his mom. Embarrassed Thera bolted over the side of the cart and onto the road. Jogging off into the trees she ran ahead while Tad got the cart turned around. Quickly she made her report to Kynwric, telling him of Jasine’s sister and that they had brought his whole family along. “I will be responsible for them Kynwric, you focus your full attention on Loraine and finding the girl.”

 

Slapping on a smile Thera walked next to the wagon as it entered the small camp.

 

[U4ea]

Loraine arched her eyebrow at Perivar, but let the subject drop. It was a great failing and a horrible handicap for a Green, at that. She doubted he'd ever truly understand, though. She focused, instead, on the issue of the White Cloak. "In time, you will learn that his death was woven into the fabric of the pattern. While it was not necessary, at the time, you, most likely, saved an Aes Sedai's life by ending his. Losing control is dangerous, in any situation. But learning to completely control your emotions, especially one such as guilt, takes much longer than a night to mull over." She smiled softly, shaking her head. "The first person I killed, still haunts me. It never goes away. Even when the death was justified, my anger controlled and the situation unavoidable. I'll remember his eyes 'til the day I die, how they were so angry one moment and just vacant the next." She looked up at him. "The guilt you feel is good, Perivar. It's that guilt that will keep you from making the same mistakes again. It's a horrible way to learn, but I'm afraid there's no better one. Just don't allow it to be a barrier to your future. Your future Aes Sedai will desperately need your cool head some day. She'll depend on your ability to control your emotions and handle a situation like that one to extricate both of you from a sticky situation. Whether you live or die, whether she lives or dies, all of it relies on how you deal with this guilt and shame you're carrying now. Some things are necessary, unavoidable and there are ways to handle the others without adding to your burdens." She reached out and laid her hand on his. "Please don't let this come between wondering about the hereafter and learning of it first-hand..."

 

She heard a rustle behind her and closed her eyes. The footsteps were light, but obvious, so it wasn't anyone trying to sneak up on them. She turned her eyes towards that direction and saw Melenis moving through the brush. She'd felt Kyn's anger calm and knew his talk with the trainee had gone the way he needed it to. "We are here, Melenis," she said, letting her voice carry on the breeze so she would find them. She watched Melenis approaching and quietly checked the wards she'd set around the camp before disappearing earlier. A carriage approached, but, again, Kyn didn't seem worried. It was curious, though. Travelers wouldn't have found them this quickly, after all...

[Sieve]

Perivar was deep in thought listening to Loraine Sedai's words and processing what she said.  He nearly jumped when she touched his hands though her touch was as soothing as her voice.  This experience they were exposed to was far better than any training they had received to date.  This was real, this was what they would face and they had the benefit of an experienced Aes Sedai and two Warders.  It was a time for learning, a time for growth.  Perivar wondered if Kabria would be so understanding, he would regret having to tell her but it had to be done.

 

He cursed himself for not hearing Melenis's approach.  He spoke as he stood "I believe that she will want to speak to you alone.  Thank you, for everything, I..." He paused a moment "Thank you."   he said then bowed formally before taking his leave. 

 

Perivar returned to the camp which seemed deserted.  Forming the flame he pushed all his emotions into the flame seeking the void.  He unfolded the fan then set about working through the basic and intermediate forms.  While dancing the forms he caught sight of the cart rolling into the camp.  With his senses enhanced it was easy to see the others arriving.  They would not need him so he continued to work the forms.  Right now he needed the distraction that working the forms allowed him.