Relationships & Marriages

[Matalina]

Currently our rules are:

People come to the Tower to serve a higher purpose, to give their life meaning - and to give that life to the Tower. We are warriors. We are human underneath, but we work hard to move beyond that, to become a living weapon, hard, fast and cold. Because of this, we have little left over for people, for love. Not only is it dangerous to us to leave ourselves open to emotion, but it is cruel to them, to know that we would die without second thought.

 

If the relationship is to an Aes Sedai and they are not bonded, there will be a great deal of time where they will be apart. A Tower Guard’s loyalty is to the Tower; a Warder’s loyalty is to his bondmate, and his bondmate only. For those who are bonded to each other, it is perhaps more realistic. And yet it would severely hamper the Warder/Aes Sedai relationship. Would she be willing to let him die for her? Will she be willing to send him on dangerous missions? Love hampers logic and prevents the job the bond is supposed to maintain.

 

Relationships involving Warders in this PSW are severely discouraged. There are many other Divisions available for those who want to roleplay a romance - the Warders is not one of them

Trainees and Tower Guards

 

1. Relationships between two Trainees will NOT require permission.

2. Relationships between two Tower Guards will NOT require permission.

3. Relationships between a Trainee and a Tower Guard will NOT be allowed, period. Wait till you are both Tower Guards.

4. Relationships between Trainnes or Tower Guards and a member of another division will NOT require permission (this includes the White Tower).

Warders

 

Warder relationships require a warder to fill out the relationship form for any relationship with anyone they wish to have.

 

Some Guidelines for Warders:

 

1. Relationships with your Sedai is frowned upon.

2. Relationships with other Sedai is frowned upon if that Sedai has a Warder.

3. Warder and Tower Guard (or other divisions) relations are permitted if the Warder understands the implications that their love MUST take second seat to their Sedai but the form must be filled out.

4. Warder and Trainess may NOT have any relationship. Wait till they are raised to Tower Guard.

Marriage

 

Any Tower Guard or Warder wishing to get married MUST fill out the relationship form. And as a side note: marriages are generally forbidden unless there is good cause for this action. Trainees may not consider marriage until they are a Tower Guard.

 

How many of you actually follow the rules?  The Trainees and Tower Guard rules aren't really out there for discussion as they are already pretty leinant.  But I'm wondering how many Warders are having relationships with someone?  And how many of you actually asked about it before hand.

 

I am not trying to stop you because I really don't want to limit your rp possibilities, however I do beleive we need to have a "class" on this in the OOC capacity to refresh a persons reasoning on what it means to be a Warder.

 

I know most of you have never taking the Warder Role and History class from way back when.  I'm thinking that when a person bonds, that this "class" should be sent to them with a read and understood reply required.

 

This way we can insure the Warders know that they can have relationships but they have a set of ideals they need to follow ICly. 

 

I'm pretty sure that no warder is asking to have a relationship so that means that ppl are breaking the rules and something needs to be done.

 

What are your thoughts.  Remember this is just about Warder Relationships and everyone's Marriages, TGs and Trainees are free to have relationships, but I'm leary on letting them freely marry, but again this is a discussion.  I want to hear what you have to say.

 

Mat

[Liitha]

oops...guilty, it started legaly had forgot about this and the fact should have filed in a form when we bonded..*goes to look for form* oh and would love to see the class btw...is it up on the site anywhere?

 

edit

um the link on the site for the form leads b ack to gaidin.org help?

[Matalina]

the form is not working which is why I know no one has asked permission :P and also why I'm going through this discussion to see whether or not the form needs to be created or not.

 

No the class is no where on the web it needs to be rewritten.

 

Ali

[Jaydena]

Well Lyssa is not a Warder yet but I did know about this rule myself but I am old school I think. I totally agree and think we need to have a form and talk about what it needs to be a warder and how that's more important than relationships.

[Arette]

I'm fine with the need for approval for Warder relationships and marriages.

 

I know that Mat would do her best to keep the form working on the website from now on, but we should also have a backup version that could be copypasted and sent to the Warder email in case something comes up.

 

And if you need help with writing the class (which could be just few essays on the topic, maybe in story form to make them more entertaining), I can help you out.

[Matalina]

well the form won't be an actually form this go around will just require the stuff being emailed to the email address required.  The form is broken because it was never copied from the old server and if it was then the link never got changed.

 

The class I think does need to be done. I envision it as an essay/informational peice that we 'd send to the new Warder before bonding and when relationships are asked for.

 

If no one else has any comments then the rules will stand and I will work on the form and the class (with the help of the staff).

 

Mat

[Matalina]

Updates to the relationships pages have been made.  The form can be found at:

 

http://www.aliciawilkerson.com/warders/?page_id=146

 

it is linked to on the correct pages.

[TaeaDawn]

My feelings about this is that if the characters are all in agreement about the relationship, then it should be allowed.  I have an issue with something that is character development being turned into something that can be vetoed because someone else doesn't like the idea.  Yes, marriage for a warder might not be the norm, but even though we are rping these characters, it's accepted that the majority of the Yard is probably just the way the books described them and not deviating at all.  If we want to rp a little different, then I think it should be allowed.  Just my thoughts on it :P

[Matalina]

In my knowledge I don't think anyone has ever been denied.  I could be wrong I wasn't always in the know when it comes to the warders.  But we need to impress upon people that Warders do not take relationships like that as the norm, that is the point of making an extra step in the process.

 

I for one would not deny it to anyone as I've done it myself twice with my ex warder character.  But the point of the form is to make sure that the Player understand the complications of the relation ship and the things that could result in the after math.

 

How many warders actually have their Aes Sedai portray what goes on and effect them when they are in a relationship with someone else?  (same for the AS in regards to her warder). *raises hand*  When Mat and Alex were at the height of their relationship Raeyn ripped Mat a new on and sent her away from him for a while.

 

It's mostly awareness.  And while you are a seasoned RPer others who might go this route are not.  There are no favorites in this game, just rules to follow by all.

 

Mat

 

Mat

[TaeaDawn]

That sounds reasonable to me. :P