What are the most important lessons you’ve learned in life?

[Ryrin]

I'm still thinking.

[Ryrin]

No takers?

[U4ea]

Figure out what really matters to you and don't let anything else get to you. It's not worth it.

 

Online arguments are stupid and winning them only makes you dumber.

 

Protect the people you love. If everyone does it, no one will be lonely.

 

Don't let pride get between you and a lifelong.g friendship. Pick up the phone, your pen or open a browser and stop waiting on the other person to do it. They're probably waiting for you.

 

Know when to let go. Friends will come into your life, especially online, and they will wander out. Know when chasing them has stopped working and let them go. If they're supposed to come back, they will.

[Wren of the Brown]

- Don't air durty laundry especially if it's about family.

- Never be afraid to apologize. You never know the full price of your pride until after the funeral.

 

Only two because it's late and I have class in the morning.

[Ryrin]

Things I have told my sons:

 

Life can and often is, hard.

Life is not a thrill ride for your benefit.

Your purpose is to be a blessing to others. You decide how that happens.

Be careful of what you write in the book of life. Everything written there will have your signature.

Live, laugh, love.

Enjoy the company of animals. They are wonderful companions.

Be responsible men, husbands and fathers.. Take joy in those roles.

Love the outdoors. Spend as much time as you can there.

[Aiel Heart]

"The sun is always shining, even if you can't see it"

 

"Every bad thing can be turned into something good--you just need to learn from it*

[Wren of the Brown]

I'm a very unambitious student of Marcus Aurelius but a student nonetheless. I've compiled what I feel is the essence of his advice and instruction with one passage from each of the twelve books of his Meditations. Book Four deserved two entries because a lot of very important things happen within that section and I felt that the neither of the two passages could be set aside for the other. These are taken from the Needleman and Piazza translation published by Tarcher Cornerstone.

 

---

 

1.17 - "I am grateful to the gods for good grandfathers, good parents, a good sister, good teachers, good companions, good family and friends, and nearly everything good. Further, I am grateful that I did not offend any of them, although I was of such a disposition which might have caused me to do something of the sort, if given the opportunity; but thanks to the gods' favor, there was no such combination of circumstances so as to put me to such a test. Also, that I was subordinate to a ruler and father who could rid me of all pride and help me realize that a man can live in a royal palace without wanting guards, embroidered clothing, torches, statues, or other such things, but rather, to realize that it is within such a man's power to bring himself as close as possible to the condition of an ordinary citizen, yet without becoming more base or indifferent toward matters of state, which must be handled in a kingly manner. I am also thankful to the gods that I had clear and frequent conceptions about what it means to live in accordance with Nature, so that there was nothing to prevent me from beginning straightaway to live according to Nature, though I still fall short of this goal through my own fault and through my ignorance of the reminders, or rather direct instruction, of the gods. I am also thankful that, once I had an appetite for philosophy, I did not fall into the hands of some so-called wise man, and that I did not waste my time publishing or attempting to solve logical problems, or busy myself with observing the sky."

 

2.1 - "Begin each day by saying to yourself: Today I am going to encounter people who are ungrateful, arrogant, deceitful, envious and hostile. People have these characteristics because they do not understand what is good and what is bad. But insofar as I have comprehended the true nature of what is good, namely that it is fine and noble, and the true nature of what is bad, that it is shameful, and the true nature of the person who has gone astray: that he is just like me, not only in the physical sense but also with respect to Intelligence and having a portion of the divine - insofar as I have comprehended all this, I can neither be harmed by any of them, for no one else can involve me in what is shameful and debasing, nor can I be angry with my fellow man or hate him, for we have been made for cooperation, just like the feet, the hands, the eyelids, and the upper and lower teeth. To hinder one another, then, is contrary to Nature, and this is exactly what happens when we are angry and turn away from each other."

 

3.4 - "Do not waste what remains of your life with anxiety about others, unless you can elevate those thoughts and bring them in relation to some good. For otherwise you will surely neglect some other important task, when you worry in this way about what some clever person is doing and why, what he is saying, what he has in mind, what he is contriving, and all such thoughts and worries which distract you from keeping watch over your guiding part.

 

Therefore we should not only avoid aimlessness and idleness in the series of our thoughts, but, most of all, whatever is overly inquisitive and of bad character. And you should accustom yourself to think only of those things which, if someone were suddenly to ask 'What are you thinking?' you could openly answer this or that, so as to reveal straightaway that everything within yourself is straightforward and well disposed, appropriate to a communal being, and without care for base pleasures or even a single one of the delights we take in our experiences or for any rivalry, slander, suspicion, or anything else which you would blush to answer that you had in your mind.

 

Such a person, no longer hesitant to assume his rightful place among the noblest, becomes a kind of priest or assistant to the gods, insofar as he tends to that interior divinity which alone can make a person uncorrupted by pleasures, unaffected by pain, unharmed by outrageous behavior, and insensitive to any sort of malice. He is a contender in the greatest competition of all: the struggle not to be overthrown by our emotions. He has been dipped deep in the dye of justice, welcoming with his entire soul all that will come to pass as his assigned portion. Rarely if ever, unless required by some urgent communal necessity, does he busy himself with what someone else is saying, doing, or thinking, for he is focused on doing what is required of him, and he thinks only of those duties and circumstances which, of everything in the universe, have been spun by Fate for him alone. He strives to make them noble and beautiful, for he is convinced that they are good. This is because each person's guiding part not only directs that person, but is itself directed by something higher.

 

And such a person does not forget that all things which come from Reason share the same nature, and that it is in accordance with our nature to care for all people; also that the mere opinion of the many should not be adopted, but rather the opinion of those alone who live in open agreement with Nature. But in regard to those who do not live in this way, of what sort they are at home and abroad, by night and by day, and what company they keep, he remains constantly mindful. As a result, he thinks nothing of praise from such people, who in fact are not even content with themselves.

 

4.3 - "People seek retreats for themselves in the country, by the sea, and near the mountains; and you too are especially prone to desire such things. But this is a sign of ignorance, since you have the power to retire within yourself whenever you wish. For nowhere can a person retire more full of peace and free from care than into one's own soul; above all, if one has that place within oneself into which one can turn one's attention, one is immediately at ease. Any by ease I mean nothing other the right ordering of the whole person. Continually give yourself this kind of retreat and regenerate yourself, but keep your rules of living brief and basic so that, when consulted, they will immediately wash away all distress and send you back to your work without resentment.

 

What is it that disturbs you? Human evil? Recall this truth to your mind: rational beings have come into existence for the sake of each other; and tolerance and patience are aspects of what it means to be just; and people do not do wrong intentionally. Also, consider how many people, having lived in enmity, suspicion, hatred, and combat - how many have been laid out as corpses and reduced to ashes. Recall this, and cease your discontent.

 

But will you let mere fame distract you? Turn your gaze to the quick forgetfulness of all things, the abyss of the ages on either side of this present moment, and the empty echo of praise, the transitory quality and lack of judgment on the part of those who praise, and the tiny area in which all this is confined. For the entire Earth is only a mere point in the universe, and what a small corner of the Earth is our dwelling place; and in that place, see how few and of what sort are the people who celebrate you!

 

For the time that remains, remember the humble refuge which is yourself. And, above all, do not be anxious or overextend yourself, but be truly independent and see circumstances from the perspective of a man, of a human being, of a citizen, a creature who will surely die. But among the thoughts that are closest at hand, which you will look to, let these two be there: first, that various difficulties need not penetrate to your soul but can remain external, unaffecting - such disturbances come from nothing other than your internal judgments; second, remember that all the things which you now see are changing and will not continue to exist as they are. Continually bear in mind how many changes you have already witnessed. The Cosmos is constant change, and our lives are but a series of choices.

 

4.49 - "Be like the jutting rock against which waves are constantly crashing, and all around it the frothing foam of the waters then settles back down. 'Oh, I am so unfortunate that this has happened to me.' Not at all, but rather 'How fortunate I am that, even though this has happened to me, I continue uninjured, neither terrified by the present, nor in fear of the future.' So such a thing could happen to anyone, but not just anyone would persevere unharmed. So why is this considered bad fortune rather than good fortune? And do you think something to be wholly unfortunate for a man when it is not even a defect in his nature? And would that which is not contrary to the plan of his nature seem to you a defect in his nature? What then? You have already learned this plan; does what has happened to you prevent you from being just, great-souled*, self-controlled, considerate, deliberate, honest, modest, independent, and all other such qualities which, when present, allow us to realize our true nature? For the remainder of your life, whenever anything causes pain for you, make use of this principle: 'This is not unfortunate. Indeed, to bear such things nobly is good fortune.'" (* - The Greek word for "great-souled" is megalopsuche, from which English gets the Latinized "magnanimous.")

 

5.1 - "Early in the morning, when you are reluctant in your laziness to get up, let this thought be at hand: 'I am rising to do the work of a human being.' Even though I know this, why am I still resentful if I am going out to do that for which I was born and that for which I was brought into the Cosmos? Or was I created so that I could lie under my covers and keep warm? 'But this is more pleasant,' you might say. Were you brought into this world simply to feel pleasure, that is, to be acted upon by feelings rather than to act? Have you not considered the plants, the birds, the ants, the spiders, and the bees, all doing their specific work and contributing to the Cosmos, each according to their unique capacities?

 

And still you do not wish to do the work of a human being? Why are you not hurrying to what is in accordance with your nature? 'But one must also rest.' I agree, but Nature has set limits to this, too, just as she has set limits to eating and drinking, and in these things you go well beyond the limits. In your actions, however, you stay well within the limits of what you are capable of. You do not love yourself, or else you surely would love your nature and what it intends for you."

 

6.10 - "Either everything is a confused gathering and scattering of atoms, or else it is all a great unity and design. If the former, why am I so eager to go on living in such a swirling chaos? Why should I care about anything but how I will finally 'return to the soil'? and why am I disturbed? For whatever I do, this scattering will come upon me as well. But if it is the other alternative, then I am relevant, I am calm; I place my trust in that which governs all things."

 

7.73 - "When you have done a good act and another has fared well by it, why seek a third reward besides these, as fools do, be it the reputation for having done a good act or getting something in return?"

 

8.51 - "Do not be sloppy in your actions; in conversation, do not be dragged into confusion; and do not allow your thoughts to wander aimlessly. Do not allow your soul either to contract or inflate; and in your external life, do not be overly busy. 'But they kill us, hack us to pieces, and pursue us with curses.' What does any of this have to do with keeping your thought pure, composed, restrained, and just? It is as if someone standing by a fountain of pure and sweet water were to yell curses at it, yet the fountain never stops bubbling with fresh water. Even if you should hurl mud or sh*t into it, the water will quickly disperse it and wash it away, and in no way be defiled. How, then, can you have such a fountain within yourself? By guarding your freedom each and every hour with kindness, simplicity, and self-respect."

 

9.11 - "If you can, teach others to become better; if you cannot, then remember that the power to be kind has been given to you for this purpose. Even the gods care for such people and help them to gain health, wealth, and reputation, so helpful are they. Such kindness is also in your power, or tell me, who is there to prevent you?"

 

10.11 - "How is it that all things change, one into another? Acquire a contemplative way of investigating this question, and continually apply yourself to this practice. Nothing so promotes greatness of mind. Such a person has shed the burden of his body and, having realized that soon he must leave all people and things behind, devotes himself entirely to justice in what he can accomplish and to the will of Universal Nature in all other circumstances. To whatever people say, think, or do concerning him, he pays no mind but is satisfied with these two things: justly performing his present actions and welcoming his present circumstance. He has eagerly put aside all preoccupation with unnecessary matters, and desires nothing but to pursue a straight path according to Universal Law, for in so doing he follows God."

 

11.27 - "The Pythagoreans say this: at dawn, behold the starry heavens, so that we may remind ourselves of those beings that are always in accord with each other and always performing their function; and also so that we remember their order, purity, and nakedness, for a star needs no veil."

 

12.1 - "The goal that you hope you will one day arrive at after a long and roundabout journey you are able to possess right now, if only you do not deny it to yourself. That is, if you can let go of the past, entrust the future to Providence and redirect the present according to justice and the sacred. To the sacred, so that you welcome what has been given to you, for Nature has brought this to you, and you to it; and to justice, in order that you may speak the truth freely and without distortion, and that you may act in accordance with what is lawful and right.

 

Do not allow yourself to be hindered by the harmful actions, judgments, or the words of another, or by the sensations of the flesh which has formed itself around you. Let the body take care of those. But if, when you have come to the end, having let go of all those things, you honor only your guiding part and the divinity that is within you, and you do not fear ceasing to live so much as you fear never having begun to live in accordance with Nature - then you will be a man who is worthy of the Cosmos that created you; and you will cease to live like a stranger in your own land, that is, surprised at unexpected everyday occurrences and wholly distracted by this and that."

[Wren of the Brown]

If you've read all of that, you deserve a cookie.

[Ryrin]

If you've read all of that, you deserve a cookie.

 

 

Where is it?

[Wren of the Brown]

In the oven. They're fresh.

[Wren of the Brown]

*bump*

[Guest]

things ive learned, dont kno if their most important becuse its early morning and i dont care bout thinking:

 

Dont trust anything that walks on two legs and talks abuot "manners" and "civility"

Respect the gods and spirits but diont depend on them and dont slave for them - you are a god in your own right, you have power, and the gods respect those who recognis this and help themself

Theres no such thing as forgiveness

Most humans are dumber thann dirt; always keep in mind in all interactions with them

Don't do anything useless

Dont do anything unnatural

Dont say anything useless

Living without honour is worse than death; next to that, death is nothing to fear

[U4ea]

I disagree with some of that, Taltos and I hope you get some people in your life soon that point out which ones.

 

More things I've learned since my original post:

1- Find them people that make you happy and never let them go. They're out there.

 

2- People gravitate towards other people who are happy. If you want friends, be happy. Even if you fake it, at first, it'll start coming naturally with the right people.

 

3- Get off the computer and get outside. Go do something in nature, where there's grass, trees, birds, crickets, and other people. Sunlight is good for you. People who are enjoying themselves while you're around them are good for you. Nature and fresh air are good for you. Take your antihistamines and stop using excuses!

[Guest]

the beauty and at same time curse of living a unique life is that very few peoplle ever will share my mind or understandin unless i make an effort to make it comprehensiblle and even then not likely to understand still. so prety much expect most of everyonne to be at odds with me

 

lol there is anothre important lesson learnedd in life

[Ryrin]

Love, love, love, as much as you can.

[Wren of the Brown]

Bitterness is a cancer, envy a poison but both are fuel by?

[U4ea]

the beauty and at same time curse of living a unique life is that very few peoplle ever will share my mind or understandin unless i make an effort to make it comprehensiblle and even then not likely to understand still. so prety much expect most of everyonne to be at odds with me

 

lol there is anothre important lesson learnedd in life

Find the ones you don't have to explain it to, dear. They are your tribe.