The Kin's Memorial Hall

[twinflower]

Memorial Day is a national holiday in the United States, celebrated the last Monday in the month of May.  Originally called Decoration Day, the observance began at the end of the Civil War to honor the fallen Soldiers.

 

Memorial Day was officially proclaimed on 5 May 1868 by General John Logan, national commander of the Grand Army of the Republic, in his General Order No. 11, and was first observed on 30 May 1868, when flowers were placed on the graves of Union and Confederate soldiers at Arlington National Cemetery. For many years, the Southern States ignored the holiday, observing their own set days.  After WWI, the holiday changed from honoring only Civil War soldiers, to honoring ALL American Soldiers who had given their lives in service of their country.

 

Over time the holiday came to include for many people, not just fallen soldiers, but any and all that had died. I must say that for my family this was true.  It was a special family day, we went to the cemetaries and planted flowers every year, and then had a family picnic.

 

Some people feel this is wrong and takes away from the day.  I do not.  *smiles*  I believe everyone needs a time to remember and cherish those who have died in our lives.

 

Originally, the day of observance was always on May 30th, until Congress passed the National Holiday Act in 1971, to make the day fall on the last Monday of the month to create the three day federal holiday.

 

Since then, the holiday has lost much of it's meaning and even observance in the USA.  Traditionally, there were parades, concerts, ceremonies and speeches remembering and honoring the American's who lost their lives serving our country.  Today, the holiday is about proclaiming the first day of summer, time for family picnics, the approaching end of the school year and opening of the local swimming pools!  The day has lost it's meaning of honoring the fallen soldiers of our country and even the loved ones lost in our lives!  To find out more about the history of the American Memorial Day look here:

http://www.usmemorialday.org/backgrnd.html

 

This is not a holiday unique to America.  Most countries have a day set aside for honoring those that have served their countries and lost their lives, and loved ones who have passed on.

 

So, uh, Twinnie why are you telling us all of this and what does it have to do with the Kin?

Well, I'll tell you!

 

We want to honor and celebrate Memorial Day!

 

This is the Kin's Memorial Hall.  We invite all of you to honor and remember those people in your lives that have died.  You can post a picture, tell a story, recall a memory, or just tell us about these special people you miss.  One of the greatest acts of healing grief is to keep the memory of the person you miss alive! 

 

The Hall is now OPEN, I hope you all will come in...

 

 

[Torrie]

Sorry this has taken so long. I have been trying to post this since the first day I saw it and just have not found the time. Great idea, Twin.

 

Sorry for the quality of the picture but it is very old and I could not get it out of the frame. lol

 

This is my grandfather and grandmother.

 

He was in WW2 and the Koren War and then he worked at the railroad for many many years.

She was a teacher until Alzheimer's made her stop. She was a great organ and violin player and had an ear for any music.

 

They are both greatly missed.

[Samuraiflip05]

Hmm, I'll have to get back on this.  I have a lot of Military tradition in my family. 

[Celarisa]

I'm late in posting on this but I've had so much craziness going on here!

 

I'd like to tell you about my father-in-law, Michael.I'll give you a little background on their family first and then go into why I thought he was so special :)

 

My FIL, Michael, and MIL, Patricia, met in Hong Kong in the '50's.  Michael was in the British Army and Patricia (who is herself an "Army brat," as her father was stationed all over the world--she even spent time living in Kenya during her early teens) was there studying.  They met and started dating and then found out that they were pregnant with their first child, Caroline.  It being the late '50's/early '60's they of course had to get married.  When Caroline was about 2 months old Patricia got pregnant with their second child, Patrick.  At this time, Michael was stationed in Wales and Patricia spent most of her time alone with her small child in a little village where most people spoke nothing but Welsh and she couldn't really communicate with anyone.  Then she had Patrick and so she was home alone with an infant and a young toddler (all I can say to that is YIKES!).  A few years later, she got pregnant with their third child, Louise.  Louie was also born in Wales and then shortly afterwords Michael was transferred to Germany.

 

In Germany they lived in another little village where absolutely NO one spoke any English.  Patricia was home alone with the 3 young children, as Michael was often away for weeks at a time.  This goes on for a few years and then when Louie was 4, along came child # 4, Desmond (my wonderful hubbie!).  Michael was still travelling a lot with his work (he was a gunnery sergeant in the British Army) and so Patricia stayed home with the kids.  Shortly after Des was born they moved back to England.  Michael retired from the Army and then they moved to Australia to be closer to Patricia's mother.  Des was 5.

 

When they settled in Australia, Michael took a job as an insurance salesman, which by all accounts he was terrible at!  He wasn't much of a salesman but kept at it.  They struggled a lot, as most young families do.  After moving to Perth, Michael took a job driving a taxi part-time to supplement his income from selling insurance.  He eventually retired from the insurance business but kept on driving the taxi because he loved it!

 

According to the family, Michael was rather a tyrant as a father/husband when the kids were younger.  He was overbearing and had a temper and didn't provide much in the way of emotional support for any of the kids.  The kids all respected him but he was not at all an affectionate father.  He was apparently more of a pat-on-the-back kind of dad rather than a hugger.

 

When he was in his early 60's he suffered a heart attack and that really turned his life around.  He developed an interest in philosophy and started meditating to relax.  He became really involved at a philosophy school and started teaching classes on meditation to various groups of students.  He continued to drive his taxi and enjoyed meeting all different kinds of people.

 

In March of 2008 Des and I started dating and I met Michael for the first time a few days later.  For years Des and Michael had spent every Sunday afternoon doing father and son activities.  They started off playing golf and then moved to bowling and then on to snooker when Michael wasn't able to stand/walk for long periods of time.  The first time I met Michael was on a Snooker Sunday.  I got into the car when he showed up at Des' house to get us and he greeted me by saying something in a foreign language.  I remember thinking to myself "wtf is going on here?"  What was I to think?  I get into the car and there is this driving-glove-wearing, crazy old guy blaring classical music who starts spouting strange things to me!  Needless to say it was a bit strange!

 

It didn't take me long to realize that Michael was like that.  He was a passionate fan of classical music, loved to read and study languages, believed fiercely in the power of meditation and positive thinking, and he loved the same thing that I did--his son.  When Des and I decided to get married, he was thrilled.  And after we found out that we were pregnant with the munchkin, when Des told him he said "I order you to have a girl!"  Between Des' brother and sisters he has 5 nephews but there are no girls in the family and Michael demanded one!!  When we found out that we were having a little girl, he was so happy that he cried.  It was apparently the first time that any of his kids had ever seen him cry!

 

Almost exactly one year ago now Des and I went with Michael on a Snooker Sunday, like usual.  When we were driving to snooker he told us that he had suffered the previous week from a cold but was feeling a lot better.  He seems to be all right and was in good spirits and up to his usual hijinx at snooker that day.  And then on the following Saturday, Des gets a phone call from his mom telling him that Michael had passed away.  Patricia went out Saturday morning to do the weekly grocery shopping and when she came home she found Michael in his chair.  She said that he just looked like he was sleeping but was gone.

 

My first reaction when I heard was "but he's going to have a granddaughter in 5 weeks!"  It was such a hard thing to deal with...he was so excited about Abby coming along and then he never got the chance to meet her.  Des didn't really have any reaction to the news when Patricia told him but it finally hit him during the funeral, which was a relief to me.  It was incredibly difficult when Abby was born.  Des called his mom to tell her and then he hung up the phone and said that he wished his dad was around so that he could share it with him.  I know it's hard for him...out of the 4 of the kids, Des was the closest to his dad and now that he's a father himself, it's difficult to not share the joys of fatherhood with his own father.

 

I wish that Michael could see his beautiful granddaughter.  It will be a year this coming week and we're all feeling the sadness of it still.  I look at my daughter and I see the joy that my own parents get from seeing her and it makes me sad that Michael never got to hug her.  I was looking forward to the idea of him getting to show the rest of the family how changed he was by being affectionate with our daughter.  I like to think that he's still around and occasionally peeks in on her.  She will giggle and smile for no reason and I tell myself "Grandpa Michael's tickling you again, isn't he?"  He was a difficult man to be around, or at least he was in his younger days.  His family all have mixed feelings about their memories of him.  For Patricia most of all, I think it was something of a relief when he left because she could finally get on with what SHE wanted to do with her life.  For me it was very different.  I only ever knew him when he was in his best years, after he found the joy in his life and grew to love those around him.  What I will always remember is the kind man who always had something intelligent and clever to say, who had such fantastic taste in music and who gave such wonderful hugs and comforting words.  I will treasure the memory of that first day in the car with him when he surprised me and the weekly rounds of him trying to cheat and put more points up on his scoreboard when no one was looking.  I look forward to telling my daughter all about THAT Michael once she's old enough to understand.  :)