Welcome to the Nuthouse - Mafia Signup thread.

[Barmacral]

Ok, sounds good then Safir, I'll waitlist you after Leelou if you want, and put CloudCrono in your place.

[Toy and Minion]

Y'know, I like being on the bottom of the list.  *inhales deeply*

 

It makes me feel all warm and llama-like.  Thanks Barm, thanks.

[cloudcrono]

I'm in SWEET!!!  Hey Safir let me know if you want back in mid game or something I feel bad taking your spot.  If you get a job quickly feel free to take over I am playing two games anyway.  Well as long as Barm and others don't mind that is.

 

DSage you are always at the top of my heart *breaks out into tears*  Welcome back man!!  Take the handkerchief of comradery!!!

[Toy and Minion]

I accept the Handkerchief of Comradery, and offer you these:

 

*gives cloudcrono a cherry*

 

*gives his avatar an empty candy wrapper*

 

It's so the ladybugs don't get you.

[Barmacral]

Don't feel bad Cloud. Safir chose to back out, and Safir know's what Safir is doing. Safir is on the Waitlist, so if somebody drops out, Safir can have another spot. That one is yours for keeps. Never fear.

[Barmacral]

There was a battle. Some called it Tarmon Gai’don, some called it a waste of resources. Others caught the highlights of the battle during the halftime show. (Backstreet Boys? Is the superbowl seriously that short on cash?)

The battle ended, and humanity was finally able to do a decent job of mending the Dark One’s mansion. He is pleased with the mortaring job by the way.

 

Now… let’s backtrack some 3000 years. Here’s what happened. Boy meets girl, girl falls in love, boy shuns girl, girl gets angry and smashes up some guys house.  Unfortunately, she chooses to smash up the house of the biggest prankster in the universe; The Dark One.

 

To give you an idea of the kind of practical joker that the DO is, he actually managed to convince the entire world that he wanted to leave his mansion so that he could destroy time and claim dominion over Randland. But let’s face it, why would he ever want to come to our puny mortal plane? His mansion has everything he could ever want and more, here he’d actually have to work for a living.

 

Well anyways, the Randlander’s don’t take well to the joke, and start getting up in arms against the DO. A few people however, thought his joke was hilarious, and joined him. Of those on the DO’s side, 13 of them were invited into his mansion and shown to the guest room for a sleepover. It was pure bad luck for those in there that right then Lews Therin and the 100 Masons chose then to put a very poor patch over the hole that they had made in the DO’s mansion.

 

There never was a taint, that was just a plot by those crazy Aes Sedai women whose only goal in life was to end Men’s Suffrage. The breaking? All politics.

Well a few 1000 years and a handful of wars… some big and some small go by. Suddenly we reach now. Rand has just won that great big battle that people think is so important, and has lived through it. Some people claim that he died and rose again, but that’s just crap for the tabloids (Did the Dragon Reborn really die? The truth is finally revealed.) and conspiracy theorists to put on their websites.

 

Rand has realized that since this big battle ended up happening (he had been hoping that it wouldn’t) his power trip as the so called ‘Dragon Reborn’ was coming to an end. He had already lost some nations, major treaties were breaking, and Rand just felt that although going mad with power (no taint remember) may be fun, but it’s too much effort.

 

Wait, wait, wait… back up a second here, you said ‘So called Dragon Reborn’ in there… what do you mean by that? Well, simple, Rand wasn’t really the Dragon Reborn, he was just the first idiot to actually complete some prophecies before the Aes Sedai (still holding true to the no men’s suffrage idea) could catch him. Lets face it, its pathetic how long it took for a guy to start completing them. 3000 years? An absolute joke; although, admittedly, some of the prophecies are a little tougher to complete, such as being born of a maiden… artificial insemination wasn’t exactly a common practice during this era.

 

Now, Rand, tired of all this power, decides to deal with all these crazed forsaken that he has running around. 18 of them in fact, you see, of the 13 that got to stay at the mansion, 4 of them got it into their heads that the whole ‘to live you must die’ prophecy was actually for them and not Rand. The idiots smashed their heads in until they knocked themselves unconscious, but failed to kill themselves. The Dark One, being the joker that he is decided to give them new bodies… while letting them keep the old. He had always wanted to see some people attack themselves, how better to do it?

Of these 4, poor Aran’gar became schizophrenic and came up with an alternate persona… Halima.

 

Rand suggests to Randland that they seal off him and the wondergirls (Nyneave because she’s good at healing, Egwene and Elayne because they too had gone mad with power and needed a break), and the rulers jump at the chance to get rid of him. Each of the four is given a nearly limitless well, and they are stuck in Far Madding with the 18 forsaken. Over 1000 crocodiles are put into the lake so that nobody can escape by swimming out, and there is a pit with a hungry underfed Rancor put at each end of each bridge. Rand and Randland go their separate ways, aside from the occasional food shipment, never to associate with one another again.

 

[Alys Kinch]

errr, wow. that's us, alright.

[Toy and Minion]

So, that's the intro.

 

Nice.

 

Nice.

 

Niiiiiiccccceeee.

[Toy and Minion]

I'm Ishamael again!  I mean, c'mon, it took Rand three tries to kill him and he was still brought back anyways.  Pathetic!

[Barmacral]

I thought you read the story. The idiot never died. Ishmael just hit his head until he knocked himself unconsious. He thought he died. Rand was off taking over nations and had nothing to do with it. Read your history man.

[Toy and Minion]

Well, yeah, but still.  He's da bomb!

[Alys Kinch]

so do we really die at the lynch or do we just get to bump our heads again and go into solitary confinement? O.O

[Toy and Minion]

or do we go to limbo?

[Talya]

We just go to neverland...

 

Wow, good makings of a story there....you should make it into a book or books ;)

[Vemynal]

Dibs on Moridin!

[MsDanya]

hahaha that is brilliant Barm!

 

and accounts are given out randomly right?

[Barmacral]

All roles are assigned to specific accounts. All accounts will be given out completely randomly.

[Toy and Minion]

Damn!  Soiled again!

 

I was lucky in the Double Blind and got Ishy, Doubt I can pull it off again.  Im not Mat Cauthon.  Or am I?

[cloudcrono]

lol nice Barm.

 

Hey that sounded like the satire I read with the scratched out Faust title.  Can't remember the title though...

 

This is going to be interesting!

[Toy and Minion]

no, cloud, it's going to be nutty!

 

*nod*

[Alys Kinch]

it was Faust Eric by Terry Pratchett.

[Alys Kinch]

And just as an experiment, and to annoy Barmy, I am going to check if the post count is on or off here.

[MsDanya]

is it on?  ;D

[Alys Kinch]

sure is. :P

[MsDanya]

awesome  ;D