Where I’ve Been

[Naked~Frog]

I worked for Brandon Sanderson and Harriot for the signing of the last Wheel of Time book. I was devastated to see everything come to an end. I've been on Dragonmount since I was 12 years old. This is my second profile made in 2010 with a post count of over 16,800. I guess I felt such a deep connection with the series and friends that I made on here that I was afraid the last book and end of the series would lead to an end to... All of it.

I couldn't bring myself to read that last book. 

Which meant I had to avoid the fansites that had come to feel like home. Because there might be spoilers. 

Which ultimately meant that my refusal to read the book I had received the night after it's release and had signed by Harriot and Sanderson was preventing me from returning to Dragonmount. My home away from home. My place to go when life was stressful and I needed to step back and talk to people from all walks of life all united under one fandom. 

My friends on here were from various countries, of various ages, religions, belief systems... My mind was forever broadened by my time here. I was exposed to so many perspectives, it would have been impossible not to grow from it. I made Facebook friends, pen pals, and friends for coffee dates. 

I know it sounds contradictory, to refuse to read that last book at let it end when refusing to read it meant I had to avoid the spaces I wanted to be in... But... Well AMOL was released during a major point in my life.

I was in college and debating the direction of my entire life. So losing something that offered me such safety was genuinely terrifying.

I wasn't ready for the world to end. I wasn't ready for The Last Battle.

 

Now I am finally reading the entire series to completion. I am currently on Book 11. 

Hearing a TV show was on the way has given me the hope I needed to finally allow that chapter of my life to come to an end.

 

I couldn't wait until I finished the book to come back. So here I am! To see my old friends and welcome in the new. I hope to grow and learn from you all over the course of our time here. 

[haycraftd]

I'm new to DM (and I'm in the Warder's Guild), but I kind of know what you mean.  I finished everything when it came out late January 2013, two or three weeks before the end of an important part of my life, when I was accepted into the University of Edinburgh for a Masters degree 15 February 2013.  As you well know (I'm still processing all you've written--nice to meet you!), I haven't left it since then.

 

I started reading the WoT when I was 13-14, and once I finished the WoT (at 25), I felt I couldn't go back.  I never met RJ, but my Latin teacher 8th grade was one of his former secretaries, his niece was two grades above me in our high school drama club, and one of my classmates at boarding school my high school senior year was one of his nearby neighbors.  But I was about to leave my former life and go to Scotland.  Sure, the WoT had defined high school and the moments I read the KoD during the lousy months of my Katrina exile that senior year were some of my happiest, but that was that.  I would be an adult, now, I wouldn't talk about it anymore, and I didn't want to think about it.  When I learned about DM (looooooooooooooooong before I reread--or listened to--the series), I didn't join, despite the fact we're all in love with it. Sure, I might make friends if I joined, but the WoT was over--so why prolong the agony? I only decided to join DM when I was halfway though the series last year--I think it was while I was reading a CoT (or thereabouts), and I only started talking to everyone when I was listening to a GS. 

 

In the years after I finished--from January 2013 through December 2017--I would occasionally think of a saying or read something I had written years before and, when looking up the reference, find out that it was a WoT saying or that I had been quoting something in the series!  (Sometimes I found this out because of DM). It could sometimes be weird how much the WoT had been ingrained--I even forgot that Jak o' the Shadows was a WoT poem for some time!  But finally, the wife of one of my closest friends revealed she was a WoT fan and had decided to re-listen to the series.  (She's a seamstress, so she doesn't read, but listens to EVERYTHING).  When she learned I too was a fan, she tried hard and then eventually convinced me to listen to it instead and when I did, I realised I had forgotten quite a few details, if I remembered the general story and I'd swallowed every trope.  Occasionally, it was like jolts would come in as I listened--"So that's where that saying comes from" or "that's why I think that!"    

 

Ending it had helped me define a chapter of my life, sure, from adolescence until my journey to Scotland.  But it turned out that the WoT was even more important to me than I thought it was--it had been a foundation stone for me.  It had helped me define life itself!  What would Mat say if he were me? It's as important to me now as it was ever, and so I'm as part of the WoT's story as much as anyone else. 

 

I hope all I've written makes sense.  But--don't worry.  Finishing it is difficult.  And finishing it might be part of the end of your chapter.  I know I thought I was lost for several months/years afterwards.  But the story and its value will never end.  

Edited April 22, 2019 by haycraftd

[Elgee]

It's so lovely to have you back here, Froggie! *snuggles*

 

I too prolonged reading the end. I had to, eventually - curiosity drove me nuts.

[Ryrin]

So glad to have you back with us!

 

I read it right when it came out. I came late to the WoT in 2010.

 

Even though the series is finished, I never thought about leaving. I have too many friends. 

 

I was sad when so many dropped off after the books ended.