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A Conversation Between the Creator and the Dark One.


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They are the two most powerful forces in the universe. Their battle defines the world for entire species and realities. This is their conversation, their duel writ upon the shifting sands of time. Our fiction begins:


Dark One: SUP.


Creator: Dude, drop the caps lock. No one to impress here. I'm just watching the Wheel do its thing, and watching your squirm in that little prison of yours. You know, the usual.


Dark One: I'm going to get out this time, you'll see.


Creator: Um, how many different revolutions have I heard that one? And from how many different timelines? I'm starting to lose faith here. Starting to lose faith.


Dark One: I have a good feeling about this one. I've got it in the bag.


Creator: Yeah, right. Have you seen the Superboys and the Supergirls? Rand is going to kick your ass and be well-rewarded for his trouble.


Dark One: That's a such a stupid nickname. You only use it because of that sycophant angel- Lee, something- but it doesn't matter! Moridin will wipe the pants off that whelp and be well-rewarded for his trouble.


Creator: Rewarded with what?


Dark One: Well, the destruction of reality itself, of course.


Creator: Right...my top guy gets to be the most powerful person in the world by pretty much every measure, and enjoy it for most of a millennium, plus he gets to marry three of the most attractive women in the world, two of whom will look like they're 25 until age 90. You guy gets utter annihilation. Hmm, I see. How's that recruiting problem going, by the way?


Dark One: You don't have to be a dick about it.


Creator: No, I think I do. I really think I do.


Dark One: You'll see. I'll show you! I'm going to eviscerate you and use your gastro-intestinal tract as a prophylactic while I copulate with your orbital bone!


Creator: You're going to what?




Creator: What's that I hear? The sound of you being sealed away by a bunch of tweens two years out of the farm? Okay, see you next time you get curb-stomped by a ginger!


Dark One: FRAK YOU.


Creator: Sorry, you're not my type.




For the full experience, read the Dark One's lines in Master Betty's voice. Never saw that casting choice coming, did you now? Also, five internets to those who know where the skull-frak thing comes from.

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