Excuse Notes

[JenniferL]

So the Atlanta newspaper has this thing right now where people can submit creative excuse notes on behalf of celebrities and public figures. This was inspired by the recent trial and sentencing of Bill Campbell, our former corrupt mayor. During his sentancing, his defense team submitted a note from his mother as part his bid for leniency.

 

So after reading excuse notes for Ann Coulter and Cynthia McKinney (You are SO lucky if you don't know who she is.), I thought this would be a pretty fun thing to apply to WoT characters. I know we have some pretty creative people here, so lets see what we can come up with.

 

I'll start us off.

 

Dear Far Dareis Mai,

 

Please excuse Isendre from her duties today. She was up late last night helping me hide...my money...that I totally earned from peddling and NOT from stealing or selling out the forces of Light. Also, we did not have sex. Not even a tiny bit.

 

Regards,

Hadnan Kadere

[Mendorah]

Dear Perrin,

 

Please excuse Faile for changing into a complete and utter retarded woman after she snagged you. You see, it is a chemical reaction when Saldean women become married. They simply forget who they are and turn into trolls. You'll simply learn how to live with it. I did. *tick tick*

 

Sincerely,

Davram Bashere

 

Tee hee hee. This was fun. And I'll have to say that eventhough Faile has grown to be a little annoying, she is STILL one of my favorite characters. Call me a nut, but it's true.

[Kiara]

Dear Shai'tan,

 

Please excuse me for not being at the Last Battle. I got wasted and ended up someplace called the Three Rivers. I'm sending some guy I met at a tavern there instead. His name is Rand. Good luck with that whole breaking the wheel thing.

 

Sincerely,

The Creator

[JenniferL]

Dear Moiraine Sedai,

 

I'm very sorry my daughter attacked you and your friends at the docks. She's been under quite a bit of stress lately, what with Lews breaking up with her, accidently unleashing the Father of Lies and then that whole dreamless sleep for three thousand years thing. Also, I think she may have a hang nail. That always makes her crabby.

 

I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive her. She has already been suitably punished at home.

 

Sincerely,

 

The Night

[goldeneys]

Dear Lan,

 

Sorry Nynaeve put you on the entire wrong end of the map, she's always been like that, never understands men, she's alway going on about "thinking with the hair on there chests". Anyways, I got to go save the world, hope ta see you at TG.

 

Good luck,

Rand

 

P.S. Don't get killed, because somehow Nynaeve will accuse me, she's always been able to do that kind of thing.

[shanara74]

Dear Tuon,

 

I am very sorry that our mutual aquaintance, Mat, is such a drinker, gambler, and womanizer. It is partly my fault, because between me and the Dragon Reborn and Moiraine Sedai, we dragged him through a hell of a lot of taverns. And gambling halls. And Red Light Districts. Ah well. I believe he will possibly change, someday. Parting is such sweet sorrow, beautiful.

 

Sincerely,

 

Thom Merrilin

Gleeman, former court bard

[LadyMoraine Sedai]

*falls out of her chair laughin* Oh all these are good!!!!

 

Ill come up with one on the morow

[KellySedai]

These are too funny!! ROFL :lol:

 

I'm going to have to think up a good one... :D