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Missing Home (Closed)


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It is late. Raven should be sleeping by now. Yuki came to her room an hour ago to take her candle away. "You have to sleep," she told her. "There's a curfew, you know that!" Indeed, Raven knew there's curfew. The Mistress of the Novices told her about it. Amalexia had told her about it... everyone had told her about it. But, she didn't care. Back home, her father allowed her to stay up as long as she wanted. It would have been hard for him to do otherwise. He was rarely home at night. As Captain of the City Guards, he had to be with his men, especially for the hardest shifts. 


Raven feels tears coming to her eyes. It is so unfair. Why was she sent to the White Tower?  Her father was ecstatic when Amalexia told him that his little girl could one day become an Aes Sedai. "This is all I ever wanted, for her to have a comfortable life," he said before telling the Yellow Sister how much he was happy that there were Aes Sedai in the world and how impressed he was by the tales that reached Cairhien about their deeds. It was all lies. Her father and the guards always made fun of the witches and their Warder-pets. 


Earlier that day, Raven received a letter from him. Telling her to be obedient, forbidding her to run away from the Tower. Someone must have told her father that she had already tried to run away twice. The first time wasn't very brilliant. She had waited until dawn to climb down the stairs leading from the Novices' floor to the main entrance. Someone had taken her traveling clothes and so she had no other choice but to wear her white dress. 


An Accepted immediately tackled her as soon as she reached the bottom of the stairs. "What are you doing? Trying to escape the Tower?" she said. Raven's burning cheeks were enough for the Accepted to understand that she was right.


The second time happened only two days ago. Raven was assigned to the garden for some manual labor. She hates working in the garden. For her, it is even more disgusting that working in the kitchen. And, there's always so many insects trying to bite her but at least it offers her a pleasant view. She really enjoys working near the Warders Yard. It reminds her of home but it also brings her to places where Aes Sedai never go.


At dinner time, the place usually empties and the Accepted who had to watch her that day wasn't really focused on what Raven was doing. She was more busy looking at a Warder trainee than at her young charge. As soon as the area was cleared of shawled witches, Raven abandoned her tools and silently walked toward the servants' entrance. 


The servants didn't pay much attention to what she was doing. They probably thought she was on some errand for a raised Sister. They didn't ask her any question when she grabbed a big loaf of bread and an equally big piece of cheese. They didn't stop her when she moved towards the door that would lead her to the outer wall.

Her heart was beating so fast that she thought it would jump out of her ribcage but the joy she felt at being out of the main part of the Tower didn't last long. A Warder saw her and again her face betrayed her. She tries to run, but no one can outrun a Warder, ... except for another Warder of course. And Raven was definitely not a Warder. 


The two escape attempts brought her extra chores and extra punishment from the Mistress of the Novices but she didn't care soon she'd leave this flaming place.


"I will escape," she whispers.


In her hand, she clutches another piece of paper. This one was written by Carrietta, her best friend. Well, Carrietta was her best friend. She doesn't know what to think anymore. Carrietta wrote about how happy she is for Raven. I hope you'll do your best. I can't wait to tell Catnya that I know an Aes Sedai! Please write me back! I'll show her your letter, and then she'll have no other choice but to believe me. Also, guess what happened? Zacchy invited me on a date!!! Do you remember how we were spying on him all the time...


Raven throw the paper away. Does the letter mean that Carrietta has another friend? Another best friend? Raven doesn't know that Catnya, she has never heard of her before. She could be a new girl in town. Who knows? And Zacchy inviting Carrietta on a date. That is a complete betrayal. They made the promise that none of them would kiss him since they were both in love with him. They even made the promise not to talk to him. Ever!


Raven wonders if this is a trick from the Mistress of the Novice to make her want to stay in the White Tower but she recognized Carrietta's writing. If this was a trick why would she agree to be part of it? Well, what they don't know is that I leave the Tower and go somewhere else that Cairhien. I could go to Ebou Dar! Or even to Andor!  Raven sniffles. She feels lonely.


Some part of her wants to write to Carrietta that she has also made new friends, like that Viviane. Viviane is so weird with her sweet smiles and the way she behaves - always so polite and all. But she's a nice person. They talked a bit in class and in the corridors. There's also Simon one of the servants. The man is old and wrinkled like a prune but he understands her and helps her every now and then when she has to carry the laundry. Her minds wander and she remembers her classes. Opening herself to Saidar had been an experience, a very frustrating one at first but now it seems that she got the hang of it. Now that she has tasted to it, she feels a craving to learn more about the One Power - at least until she leaves.


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