It's like Deja Vu all over again

[Elgee]

Novice exercises really didn't help. She'd had almost a full day to get used to having someone in her head again, and she had known going into yesterday's meeting that she would most likely be in this position should matters work out as she had hoped. It was just that when she'd originally broached the matter with the Sitters, she'd assumed that there would be months to prepare. The Wheel wove at its own twisted pace, however.

 

She could feel him approaching her door. When he'd suddenly jumped from there to here, the sudden blooming of him in her head had momentarily sent her back to twenty years ago. She was just glad that the room they had allocated for Travelling was on the other side of the Red Quarters. It would not have done for her new ... Bonded to see her collapse to the floor, moaning Arno's name through teeth clenched to keep the screams in.

 

Arno ...

 

No, he was not Arno, and her perpetual smile was the only expression he saw on her face when he entered her quarters. What he could see in her eyes, only he would know. What he could feel through their bond ...

 

"Arath." Zarinen nodded regally from her high-backed and luxuriously upholstered chair. "Please, make yourself at home." She waived casually to another, almost as luxurious looking chair. Steam rose gently from the hot, mulled wine waiting in intricately worked silver, sweetbreads artfully arranged around it on the carved table between them. "Help yourself."

 

She watched him as he poured for himself, wondering what he thought of her opulent quarters. She'd had them done in a fit of pique, along with her own, rather ... extravagant make-over. She fingered the pigeon egg sized ruby dangling between her breasts and almost wished she could go back to plain Zarinen with the wide Brown streak. The Zarinen who didn't know the pain of losing a Bonded. Of murdering a Bonded. Of being on the wrong end of this Bond.

 

 

Zarinen Rafaliva

Red Highest

[Arath Faringal]

Arath was having a little trouble readjusting his mental state for a true bonding again. Not that this was very similar to the last time he had been in this situation ... Zarinen wasn't going out of her way to cause him distress, but the sensation was unnerving.

 

Odd as it felt for him though, what he could feel through the bond was far more agitated. The Asha'man was mildly surprised to see a calm, serene looking woman when he walked through her door. He'd expected her to be bouncing off the walls or some such thing if her mental state was any indicator. Arath simply took it as evidence that no man, even one with an actual view of her mind, could understand women.

 

"Arath. Please, make yourself at home." Zarinen waved him to the other overly ornate chair across from her, then gestured to the wine. "Help yourself."

 

Wondering what her game was, because all Aes Sedai certainly had some sort of game going on, Arath poured for himself, taking in the room he found himself in. Extravagent wouldn't begin to describe it. He'd thought his own home was fairly nice. Plain, but a good sort of place. This one room made it look like something out of Illian's Perfumed Quarter. He could only imagine what the rest of it looked like.

 

Taking his seat and a sip of his wine, Arath turned his attention to his ... what was the proper term for her? The title for the last Aes Sedai he'd bonded had been 'captive' but that certainly didn't fit. Warder didn't seem like a good choice either. Bonded just sounded too ... intimate. Well ... that was a thought for another time. Right now, he had business.

 

"Well, the rest of the Guardian Council has been told of the arrangement. Some of them weren't too happy about it, but it's been accepted. The Lord Dragon has been informed as well. He was a little amused by the outcome, but he finds it acceptable.

 

"I suppose," he said, shifting in his chair, "that we need to flesh out the terms of the agreement a little. Set some rules. I'm still not sure what it is you expect of us, or why you wanted this arrangement in the first place, so I'm honestly at a loss of where to begin."

 

Setting his wine glass down on a side table, Arath leaned forward and stared at his host. "So ... where should we start?"

[Elgee]

Where to start indeed. Zarinen eyed the young man sitting opposite her, tasted the range of emotions she could feel in her head. He seemed relatively sane ... for the moment. How long was that going to last? How long before she might have to ... she breathed deeply, trying to force the encroaching fear and bleakness down. Would she have the strength to do this all over again? But she had to; that was what being a Red was all about - doing what had to be done, no matter the cost to oneself. From what she'd witnessed so far, this young man would have made a fine Red himself. Her perpetual smile took on some semblance of true humour, however ironic.

 

"I'm delighted that someone at least has found some amusement in this situation," she said a bit wryly. "As for where to start - I would say the best thing would be to get to know each other." Steeling herself, she decided on complete and utter honesty. "You will not be aware of this, but I have been Bonded before to a man who can channel. Oh, not in that ... disaster that occurred recently. In fact, I came back from exile only after it had occurred." She felt his surprise at the mention of her exile. "Yes, I was exiled. To explain why, I will need to tell you why I chose the Red Ajah in the first place. When I was a young girl, my best friend started channeling. After several accidents which troubled him deeply, he begged me to help him find Aes Sedai who could Gentle him. We both knew what would happen to him, but there was no other way. He did not want to go mad and hurt those he loved."

 

She tried to keep her voice as dispassionate as possible. "We were eventually brought to the Tower; him to be Gentled, me to enroll as a novice. He lived for ten years, after." She allowed herself a brief moment to mourn her lost friend, then continued. "For a while I considered joining the Yellow Ajah, and try to find a way to Heal the Taint. In the end I decided that hunting men who could channel and researching them would offer the best chance of finding some way of helping them. The Reds were the obvious choice for that."

 

She wet her throat from the goblet in her hand, trying to keep the huskiness from her voice. "I found a few men, and studied them, both before and after they were Gentled. It is rather a difficult subject, and I'm afraid I didn't learn much that wasn't already known. Almost every single Red for the past three thousand years has done the same thing. The next step seemed so logical to me - Bond a man who can channel." Her smile was very wry now. "So I did just that."

 

"Just over twenty years ago I found a young one, not yet taken by the madness. We travelled together for almost four years, avoiding well populated areas or any places where we might run into other Aes Sedai. The madness took him slowly. I tried Healing, almost on a daily basis in the last year. I tried compelling him through the Bond, but once he had a hold of Saidin that didn't work, and it's not a Weave that can be maintained indefinitely. In the end, he was capable of only a few lucid moments at a time. I could no longer control him in any way, just cut his weaves to prevent him from destroying everything around him. He was becoming too strong for me to do even that, though, so he begged me to kill him. I complied." She uttered the last words in a stark and emotionless voice, but her fingers gripped the goblet so hard it trembled. "I fled back to my home. To the Tower. It was discovered what I had done, and I was exiled for twenty years." She raised her chin and stared Arath directly in the eyes.

 

"What the Red Ajah would prefer to do is save you. What we can do, is save the world. Do not ever assume that does not cost us." She took another deep breath, steadied herself. "You asked why we wanted this arrangement. It is quite simple. We can no longer Gentle you, so we must find another way. What we can do, is feel what you feel, judge when you are losing control, and deal with it. If we can keep you, and those around you, safe enough to be of use when Tarmon Gai'don arrives, well and good. If not ... how would you prefer we ... deal with you?"

 

 

Zarinen Rafaliva

Red Highest

[Arath Faringal]

Arath could barely contain his disgust. Not that it really mattered, since Zarinen could certainly feel his emotions bubbling around in her own head, but he fought to keep a lid on it. Outrage and loathing raged inside, but he kept it out of his voice. "Did you ever wonder why things happened as they did? Why the Asha'man bonded all those Aes Sedai by force?" He paused for a moment, waiting for any response. When none was forthcoming, he continued. "I bonded Serena after she tried to drown me, shield me, and burn me. A random explosion blew us both away from the battlefield. When I came to my senses, she was on top of me with her knife driven into my shoulder. A few more seconds, and she would have finished me off entirely.

 

"What I did, what most of us did, was end the battle in a way that kept anyone else from dying. And every single day thereafter we were screamed at, cursed, reviled as monsters and rapists. And in the end, we let them all go. We used the bond to save your lives. And you'll use it to end ours? It is not the taint that makes a channeler a monster Zarinen."

 

"When it comes to 'dealing with us'," the Storm Leader said, voice flat and emotionless, "I have more experience than any of you. Than any ten of your ajah. I've had to destroy more of my friends and trainees in the last year than your whole ajah has in the last thirty. We do not need, or want, your assistance in this. The only comfort that any of us have is knowing that when our time comes, our brothers will take care of us. We will not be thrown to the 'mercies' of the Aes Sedai."

 

"No, Zarinen. We would prefer to not be 'dealt with' as problems that need fixing. We came to you seeking allies we could trust to watch our backs, not plant a knife in them. The dreadlords are already doing an admirable job at destroying us without the White Tower adding their part."

[Elgee]

Zarinen tried to keep the vexation from her face and voice, though to what point she wasn't sure, as he could obviously feel it through the bond. Habit, she supposed. She was at a loss as to what to reply, though. It seemed that he had either not heard most of what she had said, or ignored it. Maybe he simply mistrusted too much, which was quite understandable. What he and his fellows thought Aes Sedai should have done with male channelers through the ages, she couldn't begin to guess. Let them all run mad and break the world again?

 

She knew very little of what had taken place in that disastrous embassy to the Black Tower, having only returned to the Tower whilst that was happening. What little she had heard afterwards had made her want to throttle quite a few of her fellow Sisters. A disaster wrapped in a fool's errand run by a drunken dockworker, that had been. Not that many of the Asha'man had been any better, from what she had heard, no matter what face this boy tried to put on it. As for that insanity of having the Dragon Reborn kidnapped! Well! The least said about that the better.

 

She decided to let that go, though. The Wheel had woven, and there was no undoing it. Hopefully Arath would get to know her, and the Light willing, eventually realise that he could trust her (and a few others) too. She shuddered at the thought of what they had to live with day in and day out. How this man could appear - and feel - so normal, was beyond her; she would be gibbering on the floor, most likely. She knew what her aims were with the Asha'man, and any Reds who thought differently would feel the full weight of her wrath. As would any other Ajahs, for that matter. They were no more to blame for their eventual insanity than a beloved brother bitten by a rabid dog. At least that could be Healed, if an Aes Sedai with the Talent was near enough and quick enough.

 

"If only there was some way to cleanse the Taint ..." She wished the words unsaid as they left her lips; surely he would not appreciate any reminders of that and the inevitable result from it. She hastened to cover her slip. "You and your fellow Leader mentioned your ... defeat in Shienar. You also gave the reason for your ... embassy, as a wish to form circles with Aes Sedai. Tell me, have you worked out any exact mechanics for increasing circles?"

 

 

Zarinen Rafaliva

Red Highest

[Arath Faringal]

Arath noticed the aprubt change of subject, but let it go. It wasn't likely that the conversation would remain civil if it continued along that path, and he needed to build up ... if not a friendship, than at least a civil alliance. As the Red Sister brought up linking, Arath simply shrugged. "There isn't really much that I can tell you about it. A few of the sisters who visited us last time were willing to attempt linking with some of us. From what they told us, there is virtually no difference between adding a man to a circle and adding a woman. So long as you're ready to handle Saidin that is. Women have to be the ones to add people though. Even if I'm controlling a circle, I can't add anyone to it." He paused for a moment, wondering if he had forgotten anything.

 

"As for the taint ... I know it can be removed. I can do it, for myself at least. Though I'll be the first to admit, I'm not quite sure how it happened ..." Arath trailed off as he realized what he was feeling through the bond. She must think I'm mad, he thought, almost laughing to himself. "I suppose the only way to explain this is to show you. Link with me, and I'll show you what I mean."

[Elgee]

Zarinen suppressed a sigh at hearing that the men had not worked out any more about linking than seemed to be common knowledge. It seemed she would have to do some research in the library; though it would be more efficient to just ask some Browns - surely at least one of them would have made a study of the matter. Of course, that would probably lead to having to explain exactly why she wanted to know. She suppressed another sigh; at this rate, she would be resembling a bellows.

 

Her eyebrows shot up at Arath's next words. He could remove the taint?? Wariness filled her, and she had to work hard to control the fear that shot through her. The Light help her if the man was already going insane! And he wanted her to link with him? She almost shuddered at the thought, but it wasn't as if she had never done this before.

 

"Very well - put yourself at the brink of ... seizing the Source, and I will link with you." She had to do a quick novice exercise to gain enough calmness to embrace Saidar, then waited for him to nod his readiness before linking with him. She braced herself to wrestle Saidin into control whilst at the same time surrendering to Saidar. Sweat popped out on her brow. "Take control!" she fairly squeaked at him, and didn't even attempt to control the shudder of relief when he finally did so.

 

She grabbed the goblet resting on the table near her and took a long swallow before feeling controlled enough to speak further. "So what is it you wanted to show me?"

 

 

Zarinen Rafaliva

Red Highest

[Arath Faringal]

Arath hated linking. At least, he hated the process of linking. Putting himself on the brink of Saidin without touching it would be difficult at the best of times, he was sure. As it happened, that brink was where the taint rested. For the couple of seconds he waited for Zarinen to link with him, he felt only the foulness of the taint, without the sweetness of Saidin. After those first moments were passed it became bearable again, but it was not a process he enjoyed in the slightest.

 

A few moments later, he felt Zarinen shift control of the link to him, and he had to fight the instinctive urge to fight Saidar. It was difficult, but manageable.

 

"So what is it you wanted to show me?"

 

Reaching up to his collar, Arath unfastened his silver sword pin, showing it to the Red. "What I did, I had no intention of doing. I stumbled across it almost by accident. I have ... an unusual talent. Something I hear has been lost for a long time. Several months ago, I created this. I'm not quite sure what I did wrong, but it never worked as intended. It was supposed to be an angreal. I thought I had reasoned out how to create one, and so I gave it a shot. I made a mistake somehow. It functions more or less like an angreal, but it has the reverse effect. Instead of making me stronger, it weakens me. It steal about a quarter of my strength. It also puts a little more strain on me, and makes me grow tired much faster. It's like drinking a glass of water through your cloak. However ... it does have its benefits."

 

Letting the link dissolve, Arath fastened the pin back on his collar. "You felt the taint? How all invasive it is? Well this time, draw on Saidin through this, like you would an angreal."

 

Zarinen looked skeptical, but she seemed curious to see this through. Placing himself on the brink again, Arath kept his eyes firmly fixed on her face. He felt Saidin rush through him again, though not as strong as it had before. Within seconds he began to sweat and breathe harder, the strain of the connection taking a toll on his body. But the taint was gone. Zarinen's eyes widened, and Arath forced a smile through his discomfort. "You see? It can be beaten. Light blind me if I know how, but there IS a way to get rid of it."

[Elgee]

The boy ... man had a Talent? Not only any Talent though, but one to create Angreal and possibly Ter'Angreal, it seemed! Zarinen bit her lip, on the verge of demanding if he knew how dangerous it was for him to experiment with something like this, without proper training. Light, who WOULD have proper training? Talents were so rare these days, the thought had never occurred to her that some of the men would also possess them. This was just one more reason why the White Tower HAD to start working with the men, instead of against them. If this was true, of course - this "Talent" of his could still prove to be only a figment of his Taint maddened imagination. Only one way to find out.

 

She reached out towards the silver pin hesitantly, just barely suppressing a gasp when it actually worked! Well, she managed to pull him into the link through it, anyway, so it did function like an Angreal would in that regard - it yet remained to be seen if it did what else he claimed. Tentatively she sifted through what she could feel, her eyes widening slowly as it became evident that the Taint was gone!

 

"Mother's milk in a cup!" Zarinen stared at Arath with widened eyes, her brain racing.

 

"You see? It can be beaten. Light blind me if I know how, but there IS a way to get rid of it."

Zarinen nodded, watching the sweat starting to bead on his face. Asha'man were as famous as Aes Sedai by now for their ability to not sweat.

 

"If you were linked to me whilst using this, you would gain strength, thereby negating the lessening effect. How much does it drain you, though? How long can you channel before it becomes too tiring? Do you have ANY idea what you did, and how to replicate it?" She bit her lip to stop the flood of questions. This needed to be studied! Light, if it really was possible to cleanse the Taint ...

 

 

Zarinen Rafaliva

Red Highest

[Arath Faringal]

Arath laughed to himself as Zarinen barraged him with questions. Letting the link dissolve again, he answered as best he could when she managed to cut herself off. "Unfortunately, it is very draining. The longest I've ever used it was about half an hour. If I really pushed myself I might be able to last about twice that. I mostly use it for small things, and never really cared to test my limits."

 

The Asha'man sighed, and scratched his head as he pondered the other questions. "As for what I did, I told you before that I tried to make an angreal. We only have a few angreal at the Farm, and I was only able to study two of them before I made my attempt. Unfortunately, the stronger of the two angreal is flawed somehow. The weaker one increases your strength, but it has a limit to that increase. The other ... has no limit. There is no protective buffer on it, and it amplifies the taint as well as Saidin. I compared the two, and thought I'd found the difference, and when I built my own angreal I think I over did the buffer."

 

Arath shrugged. "Whatever I did, I haven't been able to duplicate it. I made another angreal, but it doesn't do anything at all. No strength increase, and no noticeable filtering effect. I have the theory correct, but I'm still missing something."

 

Staring back down into his wine glass, Arath thought for a moment, gently swirling the liquid. "At any rate, this proves that the taint can be removed. Burn me if I can think of a permanent solution, but there has to be something." He fell silent for a moment, before draining his glass and settling back into his seat. "But that is a problem for another day. I think we have enough to deal with for now. So you have a history of befriending channeling men, you were exiled from the White Tower, and you're now somehow the head of your ajah. What else should I know about you?"

[Elgee]

Zarinen listened intently to Arath, focussing on his every word and dissecting it as only an Aes Sedai could. She wondered what other objects linked to the Power they had at this Farm. In fact, she wondered about the Farm itself. She wondered what kind of person he was, this young man with the ancient eyes. He was hard, that she could feel. How strong was he, though? It galled her somewhat to admit, but probably stronger than quite a few Aes Sedai.

 

"What else should you know about me?" She pondered the question, wondering what would be prudent to let him know, and what needed to be kept secret. Suddenly one of those mercurial moods which so irritated at least one of her Sitters took possession of her, making her grin in a mischievous manner quite unusual for an Aes Sedai. "Well, I will be turning one hundred in just a few weeks." His expression was quite ... interesting.

 

With some difficulty, Zarinen regained her composure, though she did still feel the urge to giggle. She put her goblet on the table and folded her hands in her lap. "It has been a long day for all of us, and we've strayed a bit from your original point. Rules. What do you have in mind?" She settled in to negotiate. Much as she felt for these men, she would not allow anything that would humiliate sisters.

 

 

Zarinen Rafaliva

Red Highest

[Arath Faringal]

He wasn't quite sure what to make of that bit of information. A hundred years old? Aes Sedai lived that long? It suddenly dawned on him just how much that taint stole from him. From the Asha'man. Fury welled up in his mind for a moment before he composed himself. It changed nothing, and dwelling on what could never be helpful. So long as he made it to the last battle, he would be content. But still ... what could he do with hundreds of years ...?

 

"It has been a long day for all of us, and we've strayed a bit from your original point. Rules. What do you have in mind?"

 

"Well, first off, we are not your property." Zarinen's eyes narrowed a little, and he hurriedly added, "Last time, even though the Aes Sedai at the Farm were captives, they took on a very ... dominant ... attitude. As though they owned the place. We knew for a fact that if the position had been reversed they would have been studying us like animals. There won't be any of that. If any of your sisters want to 'experiment' with their bondmate, they only do so with full permission, and full explanations of what they're up to. The reverse also holds true of course. We removed all traces of compulsion from the bond that we used on you this time, so we can't force you into anything either."

 

Arath poured himself another glass of wine while Zarinen mulled that rule over. "Second, when the time comes, we will be the ones to ... to deal with each other. Like I said before, that is the only comfort we have. If one of us should fall to the taint ... you can shield him and restrain him, but it ultimately falls to us to end him."

 

Arath let his bond mate stew on that one for a while before moving to his next item of business. "The last thing I can think of right now is lodging. If any of you wish to visit the Black Tower, you may stay at the home of your bond mate, if he is an Asha'man. Dedicated live in the barracks, so if any of you bond with one of them ... she's just out of luck. As for us ..." Arath grinned. He got the feeling this part would be interesting." It seems that the inn that you've dumped us in will no longer work. The inn keeper hasn't had a man in her establishment for years by my guess, and didn't care much for us in the first place. And it also seems that nobody explained the exact nature of her new guests to her. She was snooping around and saw something she wasn't prepared for." The young Storm Leader smirked. "I don't think we'll be very welcome there for much longer." He looked around the lavish chamber very pointedly before adding, "You look like you have some nice enough rooms here. I don't suppose there are any available to house a few ... warders?"