Dearest Greatest. Scumhunter. Ever.

[michellem]

To Ishmael Forsaken, or my IshStarfish. I want to bind my soul to yours forever.

 

 

 

 

The first time I met Ishy would be when I joined the WT. I was assigned to house Trehelion, where he was the House Head. I liked him instantly. He made me laugh and seemed like I really nice person. I didn't have the courage to try to get to know him better though; I'm very insecure and rarely dare to be the first to start a contact, and I was so new to the site I just hung back and didn't make much of a fuss. So I just kept stalking him around a bit, wanting to be his friend, but never daring to take the first step.

 

Then I started playing mafia, and he came out of retirement after a while. That was a great opportunity for me to get out of my shell a bit. I liked him more and more, but still didn't dare to make the contact more personal. But I really enjoyed joking around in the mafia games with him, doing a bit of silly flirting and just having fun. In one game, he was my mentor and we shared a QT in wich he could give me tips and help, wich if I remember correctly ended up being more subtle flirting than mentoring, lol.

 

The thing that woke me up from my own personal issues, was to find out he was sick. It made me realize there are way more important things in life than being bound by my own insecurities. It was downright selfish of me to not offer him all the friendship and support and love for him I had. So I reached out. There was an event in the WT, I don't remember wich, think it was around Valentine, when Nya was setting up a secret messenger. I sent him this via Nya:

 

 

 

Hi there dear Ish
I'm bringing you today this wish
That this will bring you a smile in a swish
I'm not very good with rhymes, starfish
But if I could, your cancer I would squish
I know I'm the type that's quite bookish
And you are the type that like to talk about fetish
But why should that problem be a blemish
upon what could be good friends, capiche?
This poem is the worst ever, not the least stylish
So I think I'm gonna take my leave and vanish!
Sincerely, your friend forever, M

 

 

 

I laughed myself silly while writing it, and I think he laughed while reading it too He understood it was me who'd sent it, and after that dared to I feel confident in our friendship and that he wanted me there.

 

After that we've been talking on and off. We might not always be those who talk together all of the time. And I don't know that much about his life. But I don't really need to; I know his soul and his heart, and that's the most important thing. I know he's kind, caring and loving to those he cares about. He's spiteful and harsh towards those he dislike, but that doesn't bother me, I am too. He makes me laugh and smile when I'm sad, he's always there when I need someone to talk to. He's a ruthless and brilliant mafia player, even though he pretends to be all humble about it (I can see your ego from this side of the Atlantic, mister). He's taught me much, both in mafia and in life. He gets me, even though I'm insecure and weird and messed up. And he loves me even knowing all that about me.

 

For me it's really hard to talk about his negative sides; both because I'm eternally afraid to hurt people, and because he doesn't really have anything that I'd call negative sides. He's a wonderful friend, a great father, and a very special person to me. All "negatives" I can find, comes from me. I could say it's hard to get to know his personal story; but that's mostly me who's unsure about asking. I could say I don't always feel sure where I have him; but that's just my insecurities. To be brutally honest, the only thing I dislike, is that I know I won't have him around as my friend for the rest of our lives. But that's nothing either of us can control. Our friendship is hard to define; his soul speaks to mine, in a way I have experienced extremely rarely in my life, and never with anyone on DM or other places online. I can name them all on one hand actually; my husband, and me two best friends. I have other really close friends that I love so so much. But that feeling when your soul just matches another... It's indescribable.
 

Ishy, you are an extremely special person, that mean so much to me. I love you brother mine, and I'll always be your princess