Inner Reflections [Closed]

[Tigara]

There are no words to describe my anger thought Jasmyne. She steamed as she scrubbed cast iron pots and pans from the kitchens. Not only were her precious dark curls chopped off, but she had kitchen duty. She had never realized how precious her hair was to her until it was being taken. Her head felt lighter, cooler, and she always felt as if everyone in the Tower was staring at her. There was only short stubble on her head, not even enough dark hair to cover her unimaginably pale scalp. I’m never going to cut my hair again as long as I live she vowed whilst aggressively attacking a pot of potatoes that had boiled over. She unfortunately had not thought of Aes Sedai longevity when making that oath, but Jasmyne would stick to it without the Oath Rod. Determination? Slightly. Anger? Mostly. Stubbornness? Completely. She may regret this decision down the road when her hair leaves a trail two feet behind her, but it was a good idea now.

 

What angered her as much as having her head shaved was the fact that she hadn’t put up a fight. She had been too shocked at the declaration of the punishment to even think. Larindhra was taking drastic measures that not even Jasmyne would have thought of. Were they that desperate to make her behave? Well, punching a novice was kind of bad, even for herself, but Deanne fully deserved it. That girl was as intolerable as Larindhra, maybe worse! How could any single female have so much vanity, pride and stupidity? Well, others say such things about her nastiness and ferociousness, but that was different. She kicked a large pot as she stewed over Deanne.

 

But what about Selene? The girl was a puzzle to her. It was almost as if the girl’s very presence made Jasmyne an entirely different person. A nice person. Jasmyne was afraid of that person, but it felt good to be her. How was she to deal with that girl? She was far too cheerful to be human, and she was looking for chores?! No novice in her right mind actively sought out chores like that girl. If she kept that scheme up, she might not make it to Accepted. She scratched the stubble on her head as she ventured down the empty hallway. It was getting late. Life was all roses and sugar for Selene, but the Arches would crush her. Jas shivered as she recalled her experience in that particular ter’angreal. She knew full Aes Sedai who would shiver if she brought it up. Yes, those silvery archways could change anyone for life.

 

Jasmyne’s thoughts drifted to Ajahs. She would have to pick one soon…hopefully. She might have to do a lot more acting to get to that point where she’ll be allowed to take the test for Aes Sedai. Blast the Aes Sedai and their rules! But which one will she pick once the time comes? Brown? No, she did not have the patience for research. Gray? She could argue up a storm, but she was far too biased and opinionated to be an effective mediator. Yellow? Healing a bruise was incredibly straining for her, her Talent for Healing was so bad. Light forbid she even considers the White. That left her three options; Blue, Red, and Green. She could dedicate herself to a cause easily, but she might kill herself finding a cause to dedicate to. Maybe not Blue then. That left her with Green and Red. The Green Ajah was the Battle Ajah, standing ready for the Last Battle, fighting Trollocs with their army of Warders at their side. She pondered herself as a Green while walking back to her room now that she was done in the kitchens for the day. Did she want Warders? Jaydena Sedai said you felt each one die and if you died, they all went mad to avenge you. Did she want men to go mad?

 

A though crossed her mind at that point. Almost undoubtedly Deanne would choose Green. She did nothing but think of men and would bond anything with a pretty face and chest hair. The Illianer girls better watch out she giggled to herself. She wasn’t sure if that particular rumor was true, but it was certainly amusing. Getting back to a serious note, she got shivers down her back of thinking of sharing an Ajah with Deanne. That left…..the Red. Larindhra was Red. That also sent shivers down her spine. Which was worse? Deanne or Larindhra? She opened the doors to her room and entered as she began to weight the pros and cons of each Ajah against each other. The Greens felt each Warders die, but at least had warders. Reds never had any companions, but never have to suffer through feeling someone die in your head. She had no idea how that felt, but the Sisters made it out to be worse than being eaten by Trollocs. Red took that contest. Greens fought hordes of Trollocs and Myrddraal  Reds hunted down men who channel and often risk stilling. Green wins that one. Greens ogled men like Saldean farmgirls. Reds preached woman power. Red wins. Looking it over, she supposed that red was the best option.

 

The chair in her room was comfortable enough. A small cushion was provided and she had a lamp to read by. She had sat down to catch up on her Old Tongue when something had struck her. A thought that she had never really thought of before. There could be an eighth option. She was not positive it actually existed, but she had always been suspicious. Did the Black Ajah really exist? How did they get around the Three Oaths, for they must certainly be able to lie and use the One Power as a weapon? If they couldn’t, what could they do? Jasmyne’s curiosity was getting the best of her. She wanted to know if it was real. She wanted to know what happened to the Three Oaths. She wanted to be able to torture Deanne and Larindhra even after she became an Aes Sedai. Butterflies filled her stomach. Was this really what she wanted to do? If the Aes Sedai found out, she would be executed. If she said those words, it was final and there was no turning back.  She cracked her door open and looked up and down the hallway, seeing if anyone was near. She didn’t have to worry about a room-mate. Her last one had recently been raised to the shawl, picking the Yellow. As far as she knew, she was alone. She got on her knees and closed her eyes as she spoke.

 

“I, Jasmyne Ceres, hereby pledge myself to the Dark One… erm…. Great Lord of the Dark.” She heard that was what Darkfriends called him. She would have to change her phrasing in private. She sat on her bed and looked around, then looked at her hands. She didn’t feel different. Did she do it wrong? Was there no feeling when it happened? No evil tingles under her skin, no poof of black smoke, no maniacal laughter, no nothing? Would anyone know? How did they communicate with each other or find out who was for them or against them? Perhaps it’s just best to sit tight for now. She changed into her shift and crawled under her blanket and fell into a deep sleep.

 

The morning brought some changes.  She was very determined to keep her mask on, no matter what. A new mask. Not the sugary-sweet mask she grew to hate, but the indifferently obedient mask that would get her to the shawl, but wouldn’t make her hate herself. If anyone commented on her new personality, she could blame it on her haircut. A revelation of her mind, of sorts. It was, really. Just not in the way they would take it. She smiled. She was going to be very good at twisting her words. Aes Sedaihood would be delicious.

 

“Good morning, Larindhra Sedai. I finished kitchen duty last night and I’ll report to you after my lessons today for more chores. Have a pleasant day.” The Mistress of Novices looked up from her paperwork and stared at the tiny little Accepted. The Red was most certainly surprised at Jasmyne’s attitude that she was at a loss for words. “Yes yes, child. I shall see you after lessons.” Jasmyne bobbed a curtsey and turned to opened the door. She almost burst into laughter before she could get out of the room and close the door behind her. She giggled quietly until no one was around, then broke once she was alone. The look on Larindhra Sedai’s face was one of the most priceless things she had seen in her life. She had likely expected the usual rude and snappy routine, but to be meek and complacent was too drastic for her. She was smiling and happy the whole day through, thanks to Larindhra. Sedai even.

 

Jasmyne Ceres

The Dark One's newest pet

 

OOC: All RP's already started occured before this. All new RP's occur after this.