WolfLover's Return (repost that didn't make it)

[WolfDreamer]

***This is a compilation of all the post between Owen and I from the old boards.***

 

Post 1

The sun was midway in the sky when they reached the backside of the old cabin not far from the beginning of the stedding. WolfLover stopped and took a deep breath. She was returning home after a very long time away. Will I be welcome? I left so suddenly, and when I was needed. She looked down at the new wolves with her and their charges. I wonder if we will all be welcomed back. There was no turning back now though. The trip had taken longer that she had planned and they were running low on supplies. She had been dodging humans for days. They looked like the Band if she wasn’t mistaken. Could this have something to do with the Alliance Ehlana and we set up so many years ago? Has Owen brought the Band back here?

 

“Come children, just a little farther and we can rest.” She said quietly to the little ones with her.

 

“Awww mama, please we stop. I wanna play.” The little boy said. His sunkissed light brown hair and blue eyes shimmered in the sun that slipped through the treetops reminding WolfLover again of her reason for returning.

 

“Please mama, please?” echoed the little girl. With dark auburn hair like her mother and jade green eyes that sparkled with mischief, the child had a knack for wrapping people around her little finger. It had definitely worked on her uncles.

 

“You two,” WolfLover said shaking her head. “So like your father, the both of you,” she scolded mockingly and shook her head. “I’m sorry loves, but we have to get to our destination before nightfall. I’m not sure exactly how we will be received.”

 

“We love you mama.” They said in unison.

 

WolfLover bent down and hugged them both. “It never worked for your father or uncle Darren or uncle Riverwind. You know it won’t work for you. Now, be quiet and lets see if we can make good time.” The children were a little over 3 years old now and the trip had been hard on them. Riverwind hadn’t agreed with her leaving, but he understood her need to go. Darren had left a couple months before, off on some mission.

 

It wasn’t long before they started seeing other wolves. WolfLover stopped and looked around. She sent a call to the wolves of her return, searching hopefully for one she could recognize. The children moved closer to their mother and practically hid behind her skirts, but remained silent.

 

It wasn’t long before a man stepped silently from the trees and approached her. He said not a word at first but WolfLover could tell he was measuring her worth. “The wolves say you have returned. They say you have been gone a very long time.”

 

WolfLover nodded. “I have.” She stayed in a protective stance guarding the children. He took notice of the little ones but seemed not to care in the slightest. WolfLover knew that was not the case however. This one had been trained well.

 

“I will take you to Owen. He should recognize you.” The ranger turned away from her and began walking away. WolfLover didn’t move.

 

“Owen is here?” She swallowed hard. She had hoped he would be and now she was not so sure it was a good thing. She wasn’t sure how he would even want her back after the way she had left. “Can I have your name, Ranger?”

 

He stopped and looked at her. “Quickshade. And yes, Owen is here.” He turned and started walking again.

 

WolfLover and the children began following him but he soon was quite a distance away. “It is quite alright Quickshade,” she called out. “You need not lead us to the stedding as I know my way. If we are keeping you from you duties, I’m sure the wolves have informed all that we arrive. The children are tired and move slower than your trained legs carry you.”

 

Quickshade stopped and waited until they were closer. “My ‘duty’ is to see that you are escorted to Owen.” He glanced at the children with no expression. “I will remain with you until he meets us.”

 

“You have nothing to fear from me, Quickshade.” WolfLover said softly. “I would do nothing to harm the Kin.” WolfLover looked away for a moment. “After all, it was one of the reasons I left.” She looked back at him and straightened her pose. “Well, if you don’t mind slowing your step a bit, I would welcome the company. However enigmatic you may be.”

 

The children still remained close to her skirts. They had never seen another like their mother beyond Darren and Riverwind. Especially one so distant and dour. I wonder if it was really a good idea to bring them here.

 

When they entered the boundary of the stedding, WolfLover took a deep breath and relished in the feel of the peaceful feeling that washed over her. How ever many doubts she’d had, this was home. The children cried out softly and clutched their mothers legs.

 

“Hush little ones, it will be fine. This place is safe and magical. Take deep breaths and close your eyes. Your father once told me that stepping into the stedding was one of the reasons that he traveled so much. Stepping across that boundary always told him that he was home.

 

Quickshade had stopped, appearing to stand patiently while the three of them adjusted. He didn’t fool WolfLover though. She knew he heard every word she said and that he was eager to continue. WolfLover smiled and nodded in his direction when the children were more at ease.

 

It wasn’t long before the edges of the village came in site. It had grown over the years but she still recognized it. They hadn’t made it far when a familiar face stepped away from the treeline and Quickshade disappeared back into the trees. The children pressed tighter into her legs behind her skirts..

 

WolfLover

 

 

Post 2

Sitting in his office, Owen had plenty of time to consider the news the Wolves had passed onto him. They have been vague about the direction, but that was nothing new with the Wolves, quite often they only gave a general impression of directions, but the more experienced of the Wolfkin were very adept at interpreting their messages. So it was that Owen was standing just off the path as Quickshade and Wolflover approached his position. Stepping out from the darkness, Owen thanked Quickshade for escorting Wolflover then turned to face his old teacher, and mentor.

 

“I do not know if I should be happy or sad to see you old friend. So many nights I wished for your counsel, and for so many nights after you left I cursed your name. When you left so did many of my friends. I lost my mentor, my friends, and now you just walk back in here, alone, as if you have not been away for more than a day.”

 

Owen was not angry with Wolflover; he had come to terms with her reasons for leaving, even why Darren had gone with her. But that did not mean he accepted her reasoning, nor did he think he ever would. Had it not been Wolflover who had convinced him the Wolfkin were his family? She had had some help from Aragorn at the time; it is hard to argue with anyone when they are beating sense into you.

 

To leave at a time when there was need though, need for her exceptional skills as a healer, and her skills as a leader was something Owen could not forgive. They had left him feeling like the whole well being of the Wolfkin had been on his shoulders, and that weight had been heavier than death.

 

“Are you returning for good, or will this be a short visit?”

 

There was a slight edge to his voice, noting too aggressive, but he could not help the bitterness he was feeling now, her reappearance opened more old wounds than he needed “We have kept your old home in decent repair, would you like to go there now or visit mine? I have enough room for everyone and we can always visit your old home tomorrow when it is light.”

 

Owen

 

The WhiteWolf

 

Ranger Leader

 

 

Post 3

WolfLover schooled her features and straightened her poise as Owen spoke. Even though he didn’t appear angry, the blame was still there. Did he not understand what I had tried to do? Of course he didn’t. None of them did. Not even Riverwind had understood at first.

 

““My intention is to stay if I am welcome. I can promise nothing more. You say I’ve come here alone, and yet you know I have not. But I do wonder if you know who it is I have brought with me.” Her skirts rustled again and small voices became loud in the sudden silence.

 

“Uh oh Ari, mama’s not happy. Someone’s gonna get a scolding.”

 

“Is it us Stri?”

 

WolfLover had been watching Owen when the children spoke and the look of mild surprise on his face was almost humorous. Almost. “Strider, Ariset, that’s enough. Run off and play with Dust and Storm and stay ‘out’ of trouble. Owen and I haven’t seen each other in a very long time and we need to talk in private.” She looked at Owen and a look of concern crossed her features. “I can assume they will be unharmed here?”

 

Owen’s look changed from mild surprise to cold withdrawl. “As always, none will be harmed here.”

 

“Mama? Is that Uncle Owen?” Strider said peeking from behind her skirt, his voice full of awe.

 

“Yes love, it is.” She mussed his thick blonde hair that Darren had been teasing into dreadlocks before he left. She bent and kissed him on the forehead. “Please, stay with Dust and Storm and absolutely no trouble. Understand.”

 

Strider giggled. “Ok mama.”

 

“Ok mama.” Ariset echoed. WolfLover shook her head and kissed the little girls head. “You two are going to get us expelled from the stedding before the morning. ” She joked lovingly. Although inside, it was almost a serious thought. “Run along now.” She looked at the two wolves, conversing with them silently.

 

She watched them run off before turning back to Owen, her voice changing from warm and loving to distant and professional. “Forgive me for delaying you. I care not where we go, but perhaps you might have some tea available and a quiet place to talk that is not far from here?” He raised an eyebrow at her. “Dust and Storm will drag them to me should they get into trouble.”

 

He turned from her and led the way. “Your cottage still has there what you left behind.”

 

WolfLover didn’t move right away. “Owen.” He paused his step and turned slowly to look at her. “You will never accept or understand all my reasons for leaving when I did. But please understand that I left for the sake of the kin.” She moved to catch up with him as he began walking again. “If you wish me to explain, I will do my best. But it took Riverwind many months before he finally understood. And Darren never will.” She sighed softly, a hint of sadness escaping her control. She spoke softly. “I will not ask for you to forgive me Owen, for I know you cannot. I will leave if you do not want me here. I only ask for a couple days of rest and some fresh supplies and we will leave.”

 

“No Mama! I like it here!” Strider cried from behind them. "Dust and Storm like it here."

 

WolfLover stopped and tried to school her features as all sorts of emotions played on her face for a moment. She turned to the child. “Strider, I told you we might have to move on. Go and play please and let the grown ups talk.”

 

Strider stomped his foot. “Uncle Riverwind said…”

 

WolfLover interrupted him. “Strider!” she said sternly. “Go now.”

 

“Come on Stri.” Ariset said pulling on Strider’s arm. “Mama will do what’s best.”

 

She turned back to Owen. “I apologize. Sometimes he is so like his father that I wonder how his parents survived raising him.” Her eyes were glassy with unshed tears but she swallowed them back. “Come, let us have that talk. And maybe you have something a little stronger than tea?”

 

WolfLover

 

 

Post 4

“You are correct, I will never understand your reasoning for leaving. As to whether I forgive, or that you are welcome here? Do you honestly think I would let anyone come here who was not welcome? You would have been stopped and shown the error of your ways a long way from here.” So much had changed since she had left, so many battles fought, so much death and destruction, but Owen would not lay that at her feet, although her prescience would have helped greatly with the care of the wounded.” Forgiveness will have to wait; there is more than enough that I have to deal with that I truly do not have the time to worry about whether or not you are forgiven. Come, we had best use your old place as mine is not close.” With that Owen turned on his heel and stalked away. Whether Wolflover knew it or not, whether she sensed it or not, this was not the Owen she had known. Experience had hardened him, tempered him in the fires of battle, loss and worry. Life had not been kind to him since that night her and Darren had departed and many of the events had left festering wounds that no one had been able to draw.

 

“Owen slow down will you, we have come a long way and these old legs are not as strong as they used to be.” There was humour in her voice, but also and old trace of command, something that Owen guessed she would never lose, and why should she, she was one of the oldest and most experienced among the Wolfkin. Owen did not acknowledge her words, but he did slow his pace and soon they were walking side by side along the trail. “Things have been hard for many of the Wolfkin since you left. We have had to fight many a battle, often against odds that seemed insurmountable. Thankfully we have allies who were up to the task and have remained true to our cause. Even though they be two-legs they have proven trustworthy. In many ways the Stedding is now far safer than it ever was, but at the same time this safety had also made us more visible.”

 

Suddenly Owen stopped in his tracks and in a much softer voice, so soft that Wolflover had to strain to hear. “I lost both of them Miryana. Ehl was butchered by a mob of Seanchan. ‘Ris? Well we tried to find out what happened to her, we only just escaped with our own lives and only more questions about her whereabouts. There is nothing left now but duty and honour, without that it would be someone else you would now be talking with.”

 

That was all Owen could bring himself to say to her about the two he had loved more than life itself. How was he, the leader of the Rangers, supposed to accept the loss of the two he had promised to protect. No one had blamed him for the deaths; they all knew there was nothing anyone could do to prevent what happened. But Owen blamed himself, and that was worse than anyone one else’s blame, or scorn. Because of his preoccupation Owen almost walked straight past the fork to Wolflovers cabin, and it was only her gentle touch that made him realise where he was going. Sighing, gently, Owen turned off the main path and made continued along the other path. This track was much narrower than the last, and somewhat over grown through misuse. Wolflover walked it as if she had been doing so for without a break and soon they came out to the edge of the lake. Owen heard a slight gasp from Wolflover as her gaze caught sight of the Inn they had built. Owen guessed the gasp was more from astonishment than anything else. The Hole in the Wall had been built with Ogier help, and almost looked like it had grown out of the forest, so skilful had the Ogier been.

 

“That is one of the changes you will have to get use to Miryana, we had some help building it as you can see, and it has proved to be a valuable addition to the Stedding.” Wolflover looked once more at the Inn then turned to look for her old home.

 

Owen

 

The WhiteWolf

 

Ranger Leader

 

 

Post 5

“Owen slow down will you, we have come a long way and these old legs are not as strong as they used to be.” She tried to keep the humor in her voice, but the trip had been a long one and she was tired. He had made a point. If he didn’t want her back here he would never have let her enter the stedding. So why do I suddenly feel like I am intruding. Perhaps it is because of the children? She had known her departure had been hard on the Wolfkin, the wolves told her bits and pieces. But she would have been no good to them in her condition. The Dream had been lost to her for a time, her mind had lost the ability to stay focused in reality. She would have been a bigger danger to the ‘kin if she had stayed. But that was something no one knew about. Darren and Riverwind had attributed it to grief, but they had no idea.

 

WolfLover could tell that Owen had grown and changed. This was no longer the boy that lead with his heart. He was a leader now, in every sense of the word. I wish he’d never had to become a leader this way. Could I have saved him that if I’d stayed? No, I only would have made it worse. She thought as she listened to what the ‘kin had been through.

 

When Owen stopped unexpectedly, WolfLover sensed the turmoil that he was suddenly unable to hide from her. When he spoke, it was so soft that if she had not been Wolfkin she would have missed the words. “I lost both of them Miryana. Ehl was butchered by a mob of Seanchan. ‘Ris? Well we tried to find out what happened to her, we only just escaped with our own lives and only more questions about her whereabouts. There is nothing left now but duty and honour, without that it would be someone else you would now be talking with.” Tears welled up in her eyes but she refused to shed them now. He didn’t seem to realize that he had begun walking again, so lost he was in his thoughts. WolfLover understood such preoccupation and so remained silent. Nothing she could say would help him with his loss, she knew this. Only time would ease the suffering he felt but it would never go away. Not entirely.

 

WolfLover laid a gentle hand gently on his arm, as he was about to pass the fork in the path that would lead to her old cottage. Owen sighed softly and turned off the main path, and still WolfLover remained silent. When the path opened up at the edge of the lake the sight was wondrous until she caught site of the building that seemed to grow right out of the forest and disrupt the serenity of her lake. No, not my lake anymore. Life had to move on without me here. This too I will learn to accept. She caught herself gasping at both the beauty of the building and the changes it represented.

 

“That is one of the changes you will have to get use to Miryana, we had some help building it as you can see, and it has proved to be a valuable addition to the Stedding.” Owen said quietly at her side. For the second time since her arrival he had used her human name, a name she hadn’t heard since Aragorn’s death. She took a deep breath struggling to keep control of her emotions. Miriana Arwen was lost to her. That woman no longer existed. She wasn’t even sure if she knew who she was anymore. She looked once more at the Inn and then turned in the direction of her home.

 

The cottage itself had been tended well on the outside except for the herb garden, which was overgrown and hadn’t been used in a very long time. “I’ve brought seeds with me. I can replant.” She said quietly to herself. As they stepped inside she could tell no other had stepped beyond the threshold since her departure. “Well, it’ll need cleaning, but home is home. Enter Owen and know you are always welcome in my home. I think I have some wine hiding in one of the cupboards. It should be well aged.” She sighed quietly and began looking for the wine. It was the strongest drink she would have kept in her home. She quickly dusted off a chair and indicated that Owen could take it.

 

Finding two clean cups and the wine she poured some and dusted another chair for herself. She lit two lanterns and handing a cup to Owen she sat and took a deep breath before really looking at him. “I am sorry for your loss Owen. I know that doesn’t help, nor will any other words I would normally impart. Battle takes those we love most from us,” she choked up a little and stopped for a moment, looking away. “I must say you have done a wonderful job. You have continued on where I could not.” Owen made a sound as if he would say something but she continued on quickly. “You are not the same Owen, I know this. But neither am I the same as you once knew.”

 

She turned back to him and looked into his eyes and said softly. “If I had stayed, more would have been lost. I left to protect the ‘kin. None are more skilled than I am in the dream and healing, you know that. With that comes the responsibility of also being a very skilled silent killer.” Her voice lowered as if it hurt her to say it. “I have spent the last four years regaining the control I had lost. I was lost to you before I ever left.” She knew he could smell the truth of her words. “That is all I will say on that unless there is more you want to know.” She lifted her head and swallowed hard. “So, where shall we begin?”

 

WolfLover

 

 

Post 6

Owen sniffed at the wine Wolflover offered him. It was not his preferred vintage, and smelled rather strange to him, but Wolflover knew what she was doing so he took the proffered cup, but did not take a drink from it. “We all change old friend, that is the passage of time and the effect this world has on us. But when change is forced on us then it is much harder to deal with. I was once told that I needed to be more like the Willow than the Oak, I guess it is one lesson that I will never excel at.”

 

Owen did not want Wolflover to be guilty, guilt was an emotion that never did any good, and if she continued to think she had guilt to carry, then it would blight her life. But it was not within his power to take that guilt from her, only she could remove that and he doubted that she realised that just yet. Given time, he had no doubt she would understand this, but for now it did not seem she did.

 

“Of course there is more I want to know, wasn’t that how it always was with me, poking my nose into places and things that I should have kept out of?” A ghost of a smile brushed Owen’s lips, but it did not take away the hardness from around his eyes. “I am guessing it would be a conversation better left until another day though. As you said you have had a long hard journey, and with two cubs with you it must have been fraught with worry. Why do you not bring them over to my home tomorrow and we can continue our conversation then.”

 

It was not a request, more of an order, although obviously Owen did not put it that way. He had got so used to having to issue orders that it had become a habit that was hard to break. Usually it emerged at times of stress, or when he was uncertain how to deal with someone. He had no idea how to feel about seeing Miriana again. It was a reunion that was totally unlooked for and one he had never thought to have. He needed the night to sort through his emotions, she no more deserved his anger or mistrust than any of the other Wolfkin did and she had said she had very good reasons for leaving. Although he did not think there ever could be a reason good enough to abandon ones family, a sudden memory shed light on that, and in a way he could totally understand. Just as he reached for the door he turned to face her. “No matter how we parted, nor the cost of that parting, you will always be welcome wherever I am.”

 

Not waiting for a response, Owen slipped out the door into the night. Not far from the cottage a large wolf padded up to his side and nuzzled at his hand. ”I know Ice, I was not as good mannered as I could have been. I will try to make amends tomorrow.”

 

Wolflover is as much to blame as you White Fang

 

Owen

 

The WhiteWolf

 

Ranger Leader

 

 

Post 7

WolfLover leaned back in the chair as the door closed quietly behind Owen. He was right, tomorrow would be a better day for this talk. WolfLover looked around her and realized that she had some cleaning to do before she could bring the kids in. Four years of dust was piled on everything. She pulled a rag from a drawer and shook it out. She began doing a quick clean just for the night and was done in short order in the front of the cottage. When she stepped into the bedroom to tidy up her heart nearly stopped as a flood of memories rushed over her. She let them come, one after the other until they were done and she could breathe again. She smiled softly and a few tears escaped her control. She shook her head slightly and started tidying the room.

 

The house still smelled slightly musty and so WolfLover opened the door and did a quick sweep of the floor. This will have to do until tomorrow. She left the door open and went to find the children. It was almost full dark now and they all needed their sleep. She found them playing close to the lake, their small packs with them. Storm, it seemed, had drug WolfLover’s pack with them. In the nervous excitement of entering the stedding and seeing Owen again, she must have set down her pack and not realized it.

 

“Thank you my friends.” WolfLover said to the wolves watching her children. “Come along children, it’s getting late and I’ve prepared a place to sleep.”

 

Strider got and excited look on his face. “We can stay, mama??”

 

“Well of course we can stay, silly. My old home is small and we will have to share a big bed until I can make you a room of your own. But I didn’t think you would mind too much.”

 

“I don’t wanna sleep with Stri, mama. He makes noises in his sleep.” Ariset said before yawning.

 

“Mama snores.” Strider said with a big grin.

 

WolfLover looked down at her son with mock shock on her face. “I Do Not! Where would you hear such stories?”

 

“Uncle Darren said so.” Strider looked very serious and Ariset was nodding in agreement.

 

“I will have to have a word with him when next we meet.” She said sternly and the smiled. “Hurry up. Lets get some sleep so we can start fresh in the morning. We are going to Uncle Owen’s house so he and I can finish talking. Maybe you can see his friend. I’m sure Ice has grown much since I saw him last.”

 

Then Next Morning

WolfLover woke just as the sun crested the horizon. Strider was wrapped around her back and Ariset was snuggled to her front. Carefully she pried the children from her and, leaving them sleeping with Dust on guard, she jogged down to the lake with Storm. Finding an area that was furthest from prying eyes she shed her clothes and went for her morning swim. The lake was a little colder than she was used to. The last four years had been spent in a warmer climate, but she would soon readjust.

 

Returning back to the cottage she prepared a bit of porridge and the last of the fruit from her pack. After the kids were up and everyone was ready, they made the trek across the stedding to Owen’s tree house.

 

“Owen.” WolfLover called up. “I hope it’s not too early sleepyhead.” There was a smile in her voice. “Now you two behave,” she said to the children as they began to climb the hidden staircase to the top. “I hope you have some tea on. I could use a cup,” she called out. She stopped at the top, the children just behind her, waiting for Owen to grant them entrance.

 

WolfLover

 

 

Post 8

Owen was sat in his normal chair, enjoying his breakfast when he heard Wolflover’s voice from below. “Come on In Miriana, you do not need to ask.” Placing his plate on the small table at his side, Owen went over to the trapdoor and helped the three of them, it was not an easy climb if you were not used to it. “I don’t know Owen, but I am sure you made this as awkward as you could to get into your house.” Wolflover was smiling as she said this and Owen briefly smiled back at her“

 

“Once a Ranger always a Ranger my old friend. You should know me well enough to know I do not like surprise visitors, and the difficulty getting up here is enough to stop most.”

 

Owen bade them to sit down and then disappeared into his house quickly returning with three mugs and a steaming hot pot of tea. Placing them on the table to Wolflover’s left, Owen disappeared again, this time returning with a pot of honey and a small jug of milk. “Help yourselves, and while you do I will just finish off my food.” Just as he returned to his seat a snow white wolf padded across the veranda and stood there sniffing at the new smells in her home. “Yes Ice, Wolflover has come for a visit and brought two others with her, keep an eye on the small ones.” Owen had long ago taken to the habit of speaking out loud to Ice, although that was not how they truly communicated, although Owen would have put money on her understanding what he was saying.

 

It did not take Owen long to finish his breakfast and once he had taken the plate into his kitchen, he returned to his seat and refilled his mug and Wolflover’s. Placing the mug on the table Owen looked over at Wolflover and wondered whether she would be the first to speak. On his morning run Owen had decided that there was no use in him letting his feelings get in the way of their friendship, it was not his way nor the Wolfkin’s. “I think it best if we start off on less contentious issues, there is no point in any animosity between us. You know as well as I do that if it were not for you and ‘Gorn it is doubtful I would have survived those first few turbulent months. So if my words last night sounded harsh I apologise. It was not my intent to cause any harm ”

 

Owen

 

The WhiteWolf

 

Ranger Leader

 

 

Post 9

WolfLover relaxed back into the chair and sipped at the tea. “I was on the defensive last night. I have to admit that I was not sure how my return would be received. I’ve been away far too long and have spent too much time in seclusion.” She set the tea down. “I must also apologize. I did not intend to appear so distrustful.”

 

“I agree, less contentious issues would be best. I am not angry with you Owen, nor have I ever been. You will always be my friend.” She adjusted in the chair and listened quietly for a moment to the sounds around her. “On traveling here, I saw much has changed outside the stedding. I have not kept up with the news of the world.”

 

“Yes, many lands have reunited and become one again.” Owen said quietly.

 

“Ice has grown much these last years. I had not expected him to be so big. Dust and Storm are still pups, barely older than the children.” She said changing the subject. “There were five pups in all, but these two chose to stay with me. They protect the children as if they were their own.” She smiled then, “The children have heard many stories about you. Some I think Darren should not have told.” She looked at Owen then with a suddenly puzzled expression. “Owen, why is it you have not asked me about them?”

 

WolfLover

 

 

Post 10

“As always, my old friend, you ask more questions than you answer, and they are not always prudent ones.” Owen sighed in resignation. Now he would have to tell her about Irlen, and yet another wound would re-open. “Come with me Miriana, I have something to show you in way of an answer to your last question. It is not deliberate, I just cannot deal with them now.” Owen got up from his chair and led Wolflover to his bedroom. In one corner was cradle that he had made. Instead of saying anything, Owen merely pointed to the cradle then went back to his chair on the veranda, his expression totally neutral. Eventually Wolflover remerged from the house and sat back in her chair. Owen could smell the remorse from her and decided to speak first. “We were up in the mountains, hunting some brigands who had captured to of our kin. Eventually we freed the captives and found out that the brigands had been in two groups. The one we encountered was only a small fraction of their number.” Owen carried on talking, recounting the battle that had taken place in the miner’s village. It was almost as if he had returned to that place and time, so vivid were the memories, his voice low Owen continued with his story.

 

“When we had killed all of the brigands, we found they had slaughtered a all of their hostages except one, a month old baby boy. ‘Ris fell in love with him there and begged me to allow her to raise him as our own. We made sure that he had no surviving family and with the blessings of the miners we took him with us. Since that day we have had an agreement with the miners. We ensure they can go about their business without interference and they pay us a small tribute in exchange. We also helped the Band attain a contract with the miners to provide soldiers to guard the caravans that go from the mines to Baerlon.”

 

Owen had to stop there, the memories so strong he could smell the blood lined walls in the house they had found Irlen. The coppery taste of blood was thick in his mouth and he had to take a long sip of his tea in an attempt to wash it away, it did not help though, but it did allow Owen to gather his thoughts before he continued. “Not knowing my father I did not know whether I could cope with a baby. The fact he was not my own did not bother me; I just had no idea what to do, but, as always. ‘Ris did and so we brought him up as our own. It felt so good, so strange as well.” It was hard to put into words what Owen had felt about Irlen, something so unlooked for, yet he had made Iris so happy that Owen was happy as well.

 

“Then one day ‘Ris came to me and asked if she could go visit her folks. I was against it, as I could not go with her. But you know what she was like when she got an idea into her head; there was no stopping her. So one morning I escorted her to the edge of the Stedding and then watched as she and Irlen disappeared into the distance, little suspecting I would never see them again.”

 

Owen stopped there not wanting to say any more for fear his voice would break, his heart had a long time ago.

 

Owen

 

The WhiteWolf

 

Ranger Leader

 

 

Post 11

WolfLover stepped slowly into the room as Owen spoke of the child and his loss of them both. She lowered herself to her knees in front of him gently laying a hand on his leg. She could smell the devastating sadness that had engulfed him. She could feel the tension in the air from his sharing of something so painful.

 

“My friend, I did not intend to cause these painful memories to surface. Battle and tragedy takes those we love from us, and no matter how strong and diligent we are, how talented and brave, when the wheel wills it is their, time they are taken. I know this does not help your pain.” She looked up into his eyes, her own glassy with tears. “No words can be said that will ever help lessen the pain. Only time can do that.”

 

She took a deep breath and looked away from him. “If you had kept her here, she would have felt a prisoner in her own home. If you had gone with her, you may have been lost to the kin yourself.” She looked back at him. “I can understand now why Strider and Ariset’s presence affect you so. Owen, I will not force the children on you. They were excited to meet the man that Riverwind and Darren have told stories about. But they are good children, perhaps with a streak of mischievousness of their father, but good none-the-less. They can be patient and wait until you are ready.”

 

She stood and moved to her chair. “Have you tried searching the Dream, Owen? You said you looked but only found more questions. If she is gone from this world she may be in the dream for a time yet, or perhaps may have left you a message.” Owen sat very quiet not really looking at her. “If you have not, I will be happy to go with you.”

 

WolfLover

 

 

Post 12

“You are not the cause of the pain, old friend, nor do you need to keep them away from me. I am just not used to the flood of memories that your reappearance has caused. I take it Darren is the father?”

 

Owen did not want to pry too much; he knew Wolflover would tell him what he needed to know, and what she wanted him to know. However, the two were not always the same, as he had found out many times in the past.

 

Owen and Wolflover returned to their seats and continued to talk. “Yes I have been searching for her. After we got back from her village I spent nearly every night trying to find her. You would think it would be easy after the training you gave me, but there is no sign of her. At first I did not let this concern me, she was never that able when it came to entering the dream. But as you know that is not a problem for someone with our experience.”

 

From inside Owen’s house there was the sound of laughter, no doubt the children were enjoying Ice’s company, whether Ice was enjoying there was another thing altogether. “I did hang on to the hope that she had lost her memory and did not know who, or what, she is. But the more time that passed has not given me one shred of evidence to bolster my hopes. For all intents and purposes she is dead, and so is Irlen. You know, I never thought about children. I mean just look at me, I look like a freak even more than the rest of the Wolfkin, who would have thought there would be anyone who wanted to know me, never mind have children with me.”

 

Iris and Owen had never been able to find out why Iris could not conceive, but after they had found Irlen that had not seemed to matter. Iris had given her all for that small bundle and would never have let any harm come to him. “But, as Irlen grew so did my love for him, although he was the most puzzling creature.” A wan smile appeared on Owen’s face, totally in contradiction to the sound of his voice. “If you feel you can have more success than me, or if the two of us together could have, then I am more than willing to try again, but I think it would prove no more conclusive than my previous searches.”

 

Owen

 

The WhiteWolf

 

Ranger Leader

 

 

Post 13

I take it Darren is the father?” WolfLover heard the question but she didn’t answer right away. Instead she sat and listened quietly as he spoke of his attempts to find Iris and Irlen. She smiled and glanced in the direction of the children when their laughter rang out reminding her and Owen that they were still close.

 

“If you feel you can have more success than me, or if the two of us together could have, then I am more than willing to try again, but I think it would prove no more conclusive than my previous searches.” Owen said with an expression that belied the emotion his voice conveyed.

 

WolfLover spoke softly. “If you feel you need to attempt one more time with my help, you know I will be there for you. I brought it up only because sometimes in our grief and times of stress, we tend to forget there may be another alternative. Most would never think of searching in the dream for a lost loved one. Not knowing makes the grieving harder and more painful I am sure. I suppose I was lucky in a way to be able to say goodbye.”

 

The laughter of the children rang out again and the question he had asked earlier came back to her. “Darren is not their father by blood, although he made a very good one when he was needed. With the stress I was under just before I left, I did not notice the signs of my pregnancy until we had been away from the stedding a few weeks.” She looked back over at Owen, her eyes glassy but the tears left unshed. Her voice dropped to barely a whisper. “All I wanted was to be able to hold Aragorn one last time. They are the only reason I fought so hard to come back from wherever I had gone.” She blinked and tears fell. WolfLover looked away and wiped at them hastily. “They were conceived the night before the battle that took their father from me. He told me as he was dying to love again, but I’m not sure if that is possible for our kind. I want to believe it is, but for now I have Strider and Ariset to give my love to.” She sniffed softly and wiped at a tear that had escaped as she heard one of the children close.

 

Strider looked at both her and Owen before speaking. “She’s thinkin’ bout our papa again huh? It’s the only time she cries.” He said from the entrance to the room.

 

“Yes Strider, I was thinking about your father." WolfLover answered. "I was telling Owen about how I found out you and Ariset were coming to join me in this world.” She smiled softly at him. “Did you need something, love?”

 

Strider nodded his head. “Dust and Storm are outside, can we go?”

 

WolfLover smiled down at him. “Sure, be very careful climbing down and promise to stay close.” Strider grinned and left quickly.

 

She took a deep breath, shaking away the memories that would bring the flood of tears. “Darren and Riverwind took great care of them when I was unable to. Strider and Ariset were born a little early, but they were very healthy. They are also very bright for their age. They are comfortable in the presence of wolves and those like us. They have never really been in village and seen the two-legs, and they never question what that is when I use the term.” She chuckled slightly and shook her head. “However, having been around primarily Riverwind and Darren since birth, I’m afraid that their father’s mischievous streak was cultivated a little too well. As I am sure you will undoubtedly discover when they become comfortable here in the stedding.”

 

WolfLover stood and stretched a little. “So tell me more about the changes in the stedding. How fares my…” she paused and glanced at Owen with a slight smile on her face, “pardon me, the Infirmary?”

 

WolfLover

 

 

Post 14

Impossible to love again

 

Those words cut Owen to the core; he had hoped that this was not true. He had only ever loved two women, his sister and Iris, and now hearing that it could be impossible to love again Owen felt as if he had been punched in the stomach. “I am not happy to hear that old friend, not happy at all. We have both lost much, ones we held close and thought we could not live without. I really do hope you are wrong in this, to spend the rest of my days without finding anyone I could share with, would be a burden hard to carry.”

 

Just then the two children burst out of the house and onto the veranda asking if they could leave the house for a while. Once Owen was satisfied they had made it safely to ground level he returned to his chair and their conversation continued. Wolflover’s words invoked good memories of times spent planning jests and pranks and all the escapades that used to occur whenever Darren and Aragorn were around. “They were good times old friend, and we could sorely use some mirth around the Stedding. Times are troubled and I am afraid that is reflected even more so in the Stedding. Our new alliances are good ones, but against the coming storm are they enough? We are such a small group that it is hard to know what to do for the best. Should we hide away and not have any part in these troubles, or should we continue to pursue the path we have been, doing what we can where we can. The Council is still not sure which is the better route, so I took it upon myself to choose the path, I hope we have the courage and strength to see it through.”

 

They continued to talk Owen trying to remember to tell Wolflover all the major events since she had left. Not all of them were sombre ones, and their laughter drifted down to the two children as they played near the base of the tree, brining smiles to their faces to know their mother was happy.

 

“The Infirmary is much the same as when you left, still over flowing with Wanderers who have not yet found the courage to find their own homes yet. There was a fire, thankfully though it was discovered in time and only one room and part of a hallway was damaged. It was lucky it was discovered when it was as it had the potential to destroy the Infirmary and the whole Stedding.” Owen was not exaggerating there, the fire had happened at the end of a long dry spell, and the whole forest surrounding the Stedding had been tinder dry. In the previous weeks there had been small fires springing up, so much so that with the help of the local villagers, patrols had been set up to watch for these fires.

 

“I think they could benefit from your knowledge though, but I am not going to press you on this, it would have to be your choice.”

 

Owen

 

The WhiteWolf

 

Ranger Leader

 

 

Post 15

They talked and laughed over memories for quite a while. Owen told WolfLover about the Infirmary and the small fire. Her heart nearly stopped when he said that they could have lost the whole stedding. “Yes, Luckily it was caught in time.” She agreed. She would have to stop and take a tour of the building on her way home, to see for herself that no lasting damage was done.

 

“I think they could benefit from your knowledge though, but I am not going to press you on this, it would have to be your choice.”

 

“I would be more than happy to begin training again, Owen. Let me get my home in order first and then I will begin. It needs much cleaning and the Garden plot needs to be prepared for seed again.” She smiled at the sound of the children laughing from below. “Do we have anyone in the stedding that can build onto homes? I think I am going to need another room added to my little cottage?” She chuckled softly. “There is barely enough room for one to live in, let alone three.”

 

WolfLover