@Brycc alThyran how do you envision a similar topic in the Yellows?

we try to keep event threads tidy. and while this will work well in next months, we want the grey's to have it all their own. i do think a similar thread in the Yellow Ajah would be more than warranted and needed/appreciated. a topic similar that helps and allows people to express themselves. to heal and grow. of which i think Brycc is more than capable of maintaining.

i think that'd be a great thread to have in the Yellow Ajah room. also in terms of the discussion i think there's an aspect we haven't covered but @HeavyHalfMoonBlade touched on and is something that gets often overlooked. that it's ok to not know. to not be defined or labeled. yes the embracing of different roles brings passion and a lot of people hold tightly to it, but to not feel as though you can define yourself by terms or labels is 100% fine too. you know who you are, what you like and dont like what makes you you. it doesnt need to be labeled or slide into any kind of slot or definition or group. these days i think we feel like it must, but it just doesnt.

its by degrees too. its worse on some days than others. specifically for me its loud chewing/mouth noises and other unnecessary noises. seems worse in the mornings or when i'm emotionally spent. and its straight up anger at hearing it. irritation that make your head tick at the sound and occasionally the urge to yell or throttle its source. if there's other sounds like at a restaurant or if the tv's on etc, its much easier and i can, for the most part, ignore it. but distraction is 100% key. @HeavyHalfMoonBlade may not be 'or' may be a combination. though from our interactions i doubt you're a sociopath. i think you're more intune with emotion than most and as a result keep them tightly reigned. which is a form of regulation

i dont know if this helps @Brycc alThyran & @HeavyHalfMoonBlade but a non-binary friend of mine once described their realization as being equally uncomfortable being called a man or being called a woman. both terms did not feel as though they fit/suited them.

well i never woulda guessed that last one, lol

these are all EXCELLENT threads everyone.

oo games! yeah for me its animal crossing or zelda or minecraft. also a good book

right?! gosh hearing my dad eat in the morning.....headphones and music.

i dont disagree sex and romance are closely related. and i'm much the same as you, realizing asexuality was a thing, that it applied to me and explained a lot about my views and feelings, later in life, like 3 years ago. the dividing and finding/realizing i'm also aromantic is more recent as i've dissected and researched. and i think its important than in all of this we recognize there are degrees. its a spectrum. here's my understanding of the difference of emotional vs romantic attraction: while emotions are clearly involved in both, i think emotional 'attraction' is better termed emotional investment. i'm invested emotionally in my family, my friends, my society, even people i just meet, i sympathize, want the best for, feel for etc. my emotional center is drawn to them for various reasons. none of which have anything to do with sex or attraction. i love people. i love who they are, i'm drawn to some more than others because of shared belief, or an appreciation of what they do or who they are. i'm emotionally drawn for those reasons. romantic attraction is different. yes it involves emotion. yes its entwined in that manner, but it is a different thing. its feeling attraction to a person, wanting more/leaning towards intimacy. when we think 'romance' i think we all get the picture of what that involves. its physical affection, desiring intimacy (not necessarily sex.) its has a general goal of an entwined life. can you be attracted to someone wanting only romance but not sex? yes. can you be attracted to someone physically with no desire for romance? yes. can you be attracted to someone purely on a sexual level? yes. and the reverse is true also. like for me, i can't say i've ever looked at a person male or female and thought about having sex with them, wanting it or desiring it. (i am an artist and i love/appreciate the human form, physical beauty, but its just a mental thing, not a desire thing) and when its expressed or flirted that way towards me i'm uncomfortable and my brain immediately shuts it down. dont want any part of it. when it comes to romance same thing. just, nope. the only times i've thought about romantic attraction is when i thought that was what everyone did, had to do. you go on dates you find a partner etc. like it had to happen so you try and do it and try and make it work. but the whole time i was say on a date or on dating sites i hated it. it was a chore. a thing. i dont look at people and think 'i want to date them, i want a romantic relationship.' i think 'i'd like to get to know them. they'd be a cool friend' (i.e. i can be emotionally invested in them.)

emotional regulation, not something we actively think about is it? for me i think a lot of it deals with isolation and music. when i really need to stop and calm i need that type of isolation. from people from the sounds outside. i have misophonia so sounds can irritate me, headphones and earplugs are my friends. giving me the space and regulation of sound that allows me to just stop. relax. i also have a ring that is also a fidget spinner, so when i cant do the other, i have that to distract. though it's usually in combination with some focused deep breaths. anything to stop a mental spiral of thoughts and emotions.

love this. its so important to ask ourselves these things, not just ask but sit and thing and evaluate. to understand who we are. for a lot of us it happens later in life, once we start thinking 'hmm this is different or i dont quite get this' for me, gender identity: woman, there's a power in it and am totally comfortable with it gender expression: feminine but low end of that? i dont do the pink and frills, no make-up etc, have always been a tom boy but not masculine? at least dont feel it. edgy feminine i guess? sex at birth: female. physically attracted to: no one, i'm also Ace. aro/ace actually. i appreciate physical beauty but am no attracted to it in any sexual sense emotionally attracted to: we talking emotion or romantic? cuz i see those as different. emotionally i dont see sex being a part of that, we are emotionally attached to people based on relationships i believe.

oooo pets are sooo important. there are times where i just need to sit, hold and hug my dog and just talk to her. it does wonders for my mental health....whether she appreciates it or not well...

10 across: character

3 down: grief

i've been practicing reading and listening to my body and mind more. when i get in a creative slump or dont want to work etc, i recognize that i need to refuel. take it easy on myself and give myself forgiveness in understanding its ok to not work. to take some time. what i need to do is listen more to my body when it comes to food and that sort of thing.

how's about a root beer float?

oooo that reeses one sounds great. i've seen some shakes with whole slices of apple pie blended in

oh i used to do all the weird deep fried stuff. had deep fried snickers bar, deep fried reeses peanut butter cup, deep fried ice cream sandwich, deep fried oreo, but i think my favorite fair food was a krispie cream jelly donut as a bun on a chicken sandwich

i can definitely relate. the two that come to mind for me are Nana and Mom. we lost Nana when i was a senior in high school, but her life had a huge impact on me. she was always over, babysat us every friday until we were old enough to, as she said 'babysit' her. she helped on school projects, and would often come over to eat dinner with us. she had the BEST cackle. a little lady of 4'11" as her pastor said at her funeral, she was small in stature but a giant in the faith. she was a rosie the riveter in WW2, made a life for herself after her husband left her with twins. she was, quite frankly a FORCE. and never ever did you not feel loved by her. smart, wise, quick. she's everything i want to be mom, God. we only lost her back in 2021. it had been a long loooong year and the passing wasn't a surprise, but dear GOD do i miss her. she loved us SO much. she only ever wanted to be a mom and loved every second of it, always eager and happy to help at school, showed up to every game, every practice we had. every concert. every convention i went to. so fully supportive she just wanted to BE there. to discover who me and sis would be, what we'd do. a strength when we needed it, a hug when we didn't know we needed it. she was the person i went to when i needed to cry, needed strength, when i just...needed. it's so hard navigating life without her when all i want to do is share with her. show her what we're going. make her smile.

i love it when sis does some lemon bars with the lemon's from our yard or the ones our neighbors give us. spring time wise? well we're trying our first roast beef for Easter this week. if its good i'll share the recipe. *fingers crossed*

pass, i dont drink, but thank you all the same @Donchadh. now i think Mother and @Delenn may enjoy that though

*hands @Donchadh the dig in cookie* for thinking of me. thank you looks delicious something light for the grey's

one of my (and my dogs) favorite drinks and another and of course though in all honesty i still mourn the removal of the light brown M&M

i like it. but i prefer molasses bread. even made some of my own a year or so ago