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Gleeman's Tales: Incorrect Quotes

Meghan Rayburn

Today's funny feature is brought to you by the blog incorrect-wot-quotes, which combines quotes from various media and applies it to corresponding events or characters in the Wheel of Time.


First, a couple Game of Thrones crossovers:


"I am the blood of the Dragon."

-One of Rand’s kids, probably


"When you play Daes Dae’mar, you win or you die."

-A saying in Cairhien


"A Trakand always pays her debts."

-Elayne Trakand


For anyone who is a fan of the NBC show Parks and Recreation:


"Nynaeve is the best, but she’s 25. When Nynaeve was born I was already a Warder, which means if we were friends back then I would have been hanging out with a baby. I don’t know anything about infant care. Oh my god I could have killed her."



Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy:


"Towards the end of the Second Age, the Bore was drilled. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move."

-Any Third Age historian

Of course, some Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit:


"It’s mine! My own! My Preciousssss!"

-Padan Fain


"An Aes Sedai is never late, nor is she early. She arrives precisely when she means to."


-Moiraine, probably


"In a hole in the Pattern there lived the Great Lord of the Dark. Not a nasty, dirty hole— In fact, it was not a hole in any physical sense of the word, but considering the limitations of your minds I’m making do."

-If The Hobbit had been written by Ishamael


And a few random ones that I just had to include:


"Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn."

-Lews Therin, to Lanfear


"Call me Ishamael."

-Ishamael (x)


"And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren’t for you meddling kids!"

-Ishamael, at the end of any of the first three books


"I’m sick of these motherlovin’ Black Ajah in my motherlovin’ White Tower!"



That's all for now! Again, all of these quotes are from the blog incorrect-wot-quote. I hope you've enjoyed; Happy Holidays!

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At one point in book 10, Elayne actually says "I always pay my debts." There is no way that wasn't a GoT reference considering Jordan and Martin were friends.

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Here's one of my own.

The Breakfast club


Nynaeve:"What if your Home....What if your Family....what if your tabac was on fire?"

Mat: That's impossible, it's in Talmanes' smallclothes."

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