Repaying Debts of Friendship (Carnhain)

[Kael]

Kedyn walked quickly, his hands slowly opening and closing and a look on his face that was reminiscent to that permantly fixed to him a few weeks ago. People stepped out of his way as he walked to the Cavalry barracks intent on facing his friend.

 

It was three days after the battle and Kedyn had just learned about Carnhain's attempt at suicide from one of his scouts talking about it in their barracks. He was furious at the man, what in the world could posses him to do such a thing. Sure, it had been three days ago that Carnhain had almost killed him but that battle made it so everything was forgivable, Kedyn himself had tried to kill what he thought was Carnhain's image to find out that it was Carnhain himself.

 

A few quick words with a cavalry person near the barracks told him that Carnhian was in his room and Kedyn was off thundering towards it. He didn't even bother knocking and barged into the room, already half screaming at his friend.

 

"What in the bloody pit of doom were you thinking!? Have you lost your bloody mind!? You should be thankful that Darunn was there to keep you from getting yourself killed! What did you hope to accomplish Carnhian? Tell me!" Kedyn unclenched his fist and lowered his tone as his words went on, though there was no anger in his eyes only concern. His anger was fueled by that concern.

 

 

Kedyn

OOC: Like I said whenever you can, I know you're swamped right now and wanted to go relax and party

[Guest Estel]

His eyes were downcast as the torrent washed over him. Miria had told him to stay away from Kedyn, but did it count when Kedyn came to him? The part of him that was his blood lust howled in laughter at the wretch standing in front of his best friend.

 

Bitterness and pain fueled him now as he snapped a reply he really didn't mean. "I thought it was obvious!" After a moment, tears came to his eyes at the look on Kedyn's face at his harsh reply. This was his best friend, not that he deserved it.

 

"I've nearly killed you three times now. I'm not the only one who would breath easier if I were no longer around you." The words were softer, less biting, but bitter none to less. All that was left was his bitterness and pain. His arrogance of days past was swallowed in shame.

[Kael]

Kedyn's face softened as did his voice with the reply. In this state Kedyn couldn't stay angry with his friend, he looked helpless and Kedyn could see the tears in his eyes. He sighed sadly once before he spoke.

 

"Do you think I would breath easier if you weren't around, Light Carnhain do you think I care about this!" Kedyn pointed to the barely visible scar on the apple of his throat where Carnhain's bandages had cut deeply as they tried to suffocate him. "You are the person who knows me best in the Citadel Carnhain, you and Lavena have known me the longest and now she isn't here. I don't care if try and kill me a hundred more times, two of them were more like accidents. Do you think I was trying to spare you on Emonds Field or in the Trench? To me you are still the closest friend I have."

 

"You kept me alive after Lavena died long enough for Miria to put some warmth back into my heart. And guess what, whether you like it or not. You are going to live a long life and die somewhere out in the country with great grandchildren running around. I'm going to make sure of that if nothing else."

 

 

Kedyn

[Guest Estel]

Rage burned in him again. Didn't the man understand? He was trying to protect him! Light, if the man wasn't his best friend Kedyn would have killed him long ago. Sentimentality blinded him from what was truly best- he needed to get away. He needed to be away from where he could hurt others- especially Kedyn.

 

"And the other time?" His voice was bitter and the reply was a snap. "Damnit it's not just you! What if I turn on somebody else? What if it's someone who can't protect themselves like you can? I can't stand anymore cold blood on my hands."

 

The memory of his first kill still remained fresh in his mind. Anon's blank stare haunted his nightmares along with the visions of Rorth's madness and his own. So much blood. So much violence. So much death. If his family could see him... Light, they would never accept him. Rowul and Kedyn were his only family, and he had to protect them. He couldn't let his only family die.

 

"Can't you see? You and Rowul are my only family! I..." he faltered, his voice cracking as tears threatened to overwhelm him. "I don't know what I'd do if I killed you."

[Kael]

Kedyn watched with a variety of mixed emotions as his brother's face ran between rage and despair. He pitied Carnhain for what he was going through, felt helpless becuase he thought there was next to nothing he could do, and anger that he could wallow in this state and feel sorry for himself.

 

"But even if you killed me I wouldn't want you to live like this. If it is as uncontrollable as you say then why are you worring." Kedyn's voice was as soft as it had been, trying to be warm and friendly to combat the despair written plainly across Carnhain's face. He wanted desperately to do something but this....this wasn't easy.

 

"Lift yourself up and try and change, and even if you can't at least you won't be like this. You deserve to live even with your demons and what you are doing right now is not living. I should know, I was there." Kedyn shook his head slowly and sighed reufully as he thought that his words were not having the impact that he had wanted them to.

 

"I hate seeing you like this, I don't want you to continue barely clinging to life with your self pity."

 

 

Kedyn