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The Lighter Side of the Taint: Sean Connery as a Redhead?


The name is al'Thor, Rand al'Thor.


My instructions were explicit. I was to prevent the Dark One from breaking free of his prison at Shayol Ghul. Licensed to break the world.


(Bond Music)



(Private study)


Moiraine:  Your mission is of the utmost importance, al'Thor. Try to take it seriously.


Rand:  I'm always serious, M. Have I ever let you down?



Watch as he battles the world's most feared villains


Rand:  Do you expect me to just hand control over to you, Forsaken?


Aginor:  No, Lews Therin, I expect you to die.



With amazing devices from an Age long past


Thom:  And if you press this part here, the head of the ter'angreal will shoot out flames up to thirty feet. This one will allow you to open any lock, and this sword also doubles as a flute.


Rand:  And how much use do you think a flute will do in the Last Battle? 


Thom:  Just try to bring it back in one piece, al'Thor.


And with beautiful women at every turn



Min:  I know I'm not the only girl in your life, al'Thor, but do you have to be so cavalier? 


Rand:  Elmindreda, what would I do without you?




Elayne:  Well, well, and what have we here?


Join Rand al'Thor in 


"Eye of the World"


Coming soon to a theater near you





Rand:  Mother's milk in a cup. Shaken, not stirred.

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This is.... how shall I say it... BRILLIANT!


I could hear Connery's voice in my head as I read each line, with his distinct accent. 

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