OOC: Only if you forgive me as well!

Karadar sat with his eyes shut, in resolute silence, trying to empty his mind of all distractions. For him, that was no easy task. He had never been one to simply empty his mind. Even when he was working at his forge, his mind had been a constant stream of thoughts. He would prepare, rehearse, and plan for the worst all inside his own mind while he forged whatever he was working on that day. He imagined the flame, and before long he could see it before him. He could feel the edges of its blistering, all consuming heat lightly touching his skin.

Slowly, he began to feed the flame with myriad of stray thoughts entering his mind. A random thought about the weather, into the flame. A thought about his old forge, into the flame. The sound of rapid cooling steel bubbling in the blood of a noble, into the flame. One by one, he tossed each and every thought in. It wasn’t easy, since many of the thoughts would come unbidden back, and once he figured out how to stop that his mind would begin to manufacture new things, before too long he was finally able to hold that void. Devoid of thought for a moment, he was surprised when he heard Tai speak again, “Good. Now I want you to achieve the nothingness again. This time while holding on to nothingness, stretch your awareness outward. This will be hard at first but trust me, over time it will become as easy as breathing. The way people explain what they sense is different. Some feel a light of sorts just out of sight like the sun on your back. Others feel a pulsing, like the flickering of a candle flame. Stretch out and feel this light. Do not reach out to it. Simply sense it. Let me know when you feel that light."

Getting a little better at it, Karadar took a few minutes to clear his mind, and then sat there, holding onto the void. In a moment he felt it, a spattering heat on his back as if he were standing with his back to the ocean, being sprayed by light instead of water. He wasn’t sure how to explain it but he instinctively looked towards the source and found the cause. His mouth gaped open in astonishment as his attention was consumed by the flood of pure light, just beyond his reach. It was torrential, like a raging rapid that could consume the mind. His eyes snapped open as his thoughts began to race forward to the forefront of his mind. He tried to stand, but had forgotten how he had been sitting on the log and instead fell backwards over it. As he picked himself up off the ground, he looked to Tai, “What was that!?”

Karadar awoke with a start that morning. As the sounds of the barracks began to right themselves in his ear, he could hear the whimpers of men crying. Sleep had been fitfull at best, constantly interupted by the sobs or wails of the men around him. Sitting up, Karadar realized that it was not yet light outside, yet he had been awoken by the sounds of one of the other men getting up and muttering as he tip toed to the door. Listening carefully, Karadar heard the man muttering, “Gotta get outta ‘ere. Can’t go crazy…” Karadar jumped from the bed, his bare feet landing on the wood floor. The man jumped with a start and turned toward him, “Where do you think you’re going?” Karadar asked.

“I’m getting outta ‘ere! I don’t wanna die!”

“If you try to leave, you will die anyway. The Asha’man will kill you for your betrayal,” he said, rather matter of factly, “At least here you have a chance to do something honorable with your miserable, cursed life.”

“I’ll take me chances with them and my cursed life then,” the man said, turning back around toward the door. Karadar reach out and grasped his shoulder with his left hand spinning the man around to face him, while his right hand lashed out in a powerful hook, driven by arms more used to swinging hammers then fists. A loud crack issued in the barracks as his fist caught the left side of the man’s face and with a thump, he crumpled to the floor. Karadar shook his hand, as if trying to shake the stinging sensation from it. He left him lying on the floor, and grasped the side of the top bunk where he had been sleeping, then said to those who had woken to the sounds of their tussel, “Let the coward lay where he is. Maybe the pain in his neck will remind him that there’s worse then fists out there to keep him here.” He could hear whispers as he laid back down, but put them out of his mind, instead trying to focus on what the day would hold for him.

An hour passed, and the first rays of sunlight lit Karadar’s face. He hadn’t actually gone back to sleep, so he merely jumped out of bed, dressed, and left the barracks without saying a word. As he made his way across the farm, he made sure to offer a respectful nod and “Good Morning” to the Dedicated and Asha’man who were up and moving around the farm. It wasn’t long before he found the trail, following it southeast to an open clearing. Just as he turned the corner to bring the clearing into full view, he was greeted with the sound of Tai’s voice, “Ahh, it is good to see you Karadar. I trust you slept well?"

He nodded and said, “Well enough, I have no complaints sir.”

Tai motioned toward the wooden bench sitting across from him saying, “Come, sit. Today you will learn your purpose.” Karadar sat in the place indicated and steeled himself to take his first step into a larger world. He told Tai solemnly, "I hope it won't be a problem, but I thought you should know that I struck one of the other Soldiers this morning sir. I caught him trying to leave the Barracks to run away, so I knocked him out. I figured it'd be better dealt with right there then letting it escalate."

Karadar solemnly pondered what he had been told. It may not have been what he expected when he came here, but it could actually be better then what he expected. Perhaps he’d have a chance to fight the darkness before the madness took him. The duty that having this ability had placed on him was greater than he expected. However, it was a sacred duty, and one he could approach with fervor. He was reminded for a moment of a quote he had read once, When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and your only duty is to death.

The second bowl disappeared much slower as he pondered Tai’s words. The harsh reality of his new situation only served to reinforce his resolve. There was no where else he’d want to be, even with the threat of madness or death looming over him. There was too much darkness in this world, and even if he had to mortgage his soul, if he could make one other person not have to experience what he had, then it would be more than worth it.

As he finished eating, he shook his head at Tai, “Just one, where will I stay? Is there a barracks or will I be building my own home with the Power as well?”

OOC: Alrighty, once he knows the answer to that question, lets start blowing stuff up  ;)

Karadar strode out the door, still absorbing everything he’d seen thus far. He knew that the Asha’man were a force of male channelers for the Dragon Reborn, but he had suddenly realized that he had no idea what exactly male channelers were capable of. Sure, he knew they had broken the world long ago and that they were all doomed to go insane, but that didn’t change that he had no idea what they could do… or for that matter what he himself could do now. Finding the washroom, he grabbed water from a bucket and splashed some on his face. The cold water hit him like opening the door into a blizzard, but when he opened his eyes everything was still the same. He had thought for an instant that perhaps he was delusional and he was imagining the entire thing. I may not be now, but I probably will be before long… It was a sobering thought, and one that may not be too far from the truth. He peeled himself out of the tattered clothes he wore and changed quickly into one of the uniforms he had been given. The black coat fit snugly over his muscular torso, but the pants seemed to be a good size. More importantly it was much warmer than the scraps that remained of his old clothes. For a moment, as he looked at his old clothes on the ground, he was reminded of the day he bought them. A peaceful fall day in Tear came unbidden to his mind, yet as soon as it appeared it was gone, thrown from his mind. A weapon has no need for niceties.

He strode across the open ground, following the directions he had been previously given to the Inn. As he walked inside, he saw a mixture of black coats and ordinary people, which set him wondering just how many civilians walked these grounds. He quickly spotted Tai, already seated with wine and bowls of food laid out for them. Suddenly reminded of his ravenous hunger, he sat and began eating, practically inhaling the stew laid out before him. As the waitress took the bowl and went to get another, he drank some of the spiced wine and looked to Tai. “Sir, I’d like to thank you for taking me in like this. Not many would, but I promise you that you won’t regret it.” Carefully, he asked, “Sir, I do have a couple of questions though. I never paid much attention to the news while I was working in Tear, so forgive my ignorance. Just how long do I have before I go crazy and start killing people? Where is the Lord Dragon fighting? Is the Power somehow connected to these crazy weather changes we’ve been having? What do I need to do to start learning to do what those other men were doing... to channel?”

Andor? Karadar thought, more than a bit surprised, I had no idea they could do things like that with channeling. I thought it was only used to kill people and blow stuff up. Making a mental note of it, he followed behind Tai, trying to take in all that was going on around him. Everyone around him seemed so hard, which was fine with him. If he was going to sharpen himself into a weapon of justice, he’d need to be hard too, in both mind and body.

As they entered the manor, Karadar could feel his skin thawing as he was warmed by the fires. As they entered the office, he sat in the chair indicated. “Now then, please spell your name for me and tell me a little about yourself,” Tai said to him, as he held the quill over a large book. Karadar cleared his thoat, and began again, his deep voice still hoarse, but beginning to adjust to speaking again, “K-A-R-A-D-A-R. As for me, I’m not sure what to say. I was born in Calebri, a small town in the north of Tear, near the Cairhien border. I was apprenticed to the blacksmith Uluthar there. When I finished my apprenticeship, I moved to Tear so that I could try to make more money in the big city.” He paused for a moment, the memories flooding back, “There I met the most beautiful woman in the world, Ayelin. We married in the spring, and for a few wonderful years I knew heaven in that city.” Tears began to well up in his eyes as he imagined her face. He looked up toward the ceiling and continued, “She was perfect, she was my world, and she made me a better person. She was stolen away from me about a week ago. Lord Melkar commissioned me to make a sword for him. It would be my first masterpeice, and he offered me a handsome sum to create it for him. The day I made it though, he came to me and demanded I take a quarter of the price. When I refused, his two goons showed up, one of them with my darling Ayelin. They killed her. Slit her throat right in front of me, on the stones outside my shop,” the tears began to run down the sides of his face slowly. He reach up and wiped them away, and looked Tai straight in the eye. A gleam of righteous anger in his eye, he continued, “I rushed at them, when suddenly lightning struck the two goons dead where they stood. Lord Melkar was knocked to the ground by the lightning, but I wasn’t stopping. I slammed him to the stone of my forge, pulled the blazing hot sword from it, and killed him with it.” He opened his right hand and held it palm upward to him. The scarring of the burn had branded his palm with vertical scars on the palm itself. His skin looked as though it were still patching itself up.

He lowered his head as he forced the memories from his mind. He heard Tai move and rummage through something, before feeling a coat land on top of him. Tai leaned against the desk and spoke, “Karadar, I would like to have a hand in helping you learn Saidin if you will allow me from time to time. Call it a Mentor of sorts. You don't have to answer right away, in fact. If you have any questions, we can go to the Inn to grab a bite to eat and I will do my best to answer them. I am sure you are a little overwhelmed at this point.”

Karadar stood, “I’d really appreciate the help actually. If you don’t mind, I’d like to change into one of these and then meet you there. I have a lot of questions, and I’m eager to get started.”

OOC: Sure, we can keep going. I have a few questions myself, and since he knows very little, I can just ask them IC and kill two birds with one stone :)

As Tai finished telling his story, Karadar still felt relief washing over him. It was beyond fortunate that he had found someone sympathetic to his cause here, though he took it as another sign of the Creator's blessing on his actions. If he could not live to create things with his darling Ayelin, perhaps he could live to destroy them with the Asha'man. He pushed those thoughts from his mind, focusing ever more intently on the flame. Abruptly, the small sword of fired disappeared, signaling the end of the test to him.

“You can channel my friend,” Tai told him solemnly, “Your life has meaning again.” Karadar held his gaze until the two of them stood. Inside, Karadar felt both a glimmer of excitement and the fangs of self-loathing. Perhaps I am cursed, he thought, Not just to lose my mind. Not just to destroy everything I hold dear. Perhaps the Creator himself has cursed me by destroying all that I hold dear before I even knew that I was cursed. This thought horrified him, yet at the same time he found some solace in it. The Asha'man may not be able to stop him from losing his mind and becoming the very evil he sought to destroy, but they would help him destroy that evil until he was no longer in his right mind enough to do it. And then, they could help him end his own life.

Karadar shook off his own thoughts, watching intently as Tai wove the gateway. He had no idea what he was seeing or watching, but he observed it quietly none the less. The silvery slash hung in the air, turning to reveal what appeared to be a window to another place. Before he had much time to register what was through the gateway, Tai stepped through. Without hesitation, Karadar stepped through as well.

He found himself in a much colder place than he had ever lived before. Tear was quite warm compared to most of the rest of the world he had been told. With the exception of the deserts that lie beyond the mountains, where the Aiel lived. Even Tear had been abysmally cold recently, making this place freezing to him. As he shivered a bit, he noticed that neither Tai nor many of the men he could see milling around the place seemed to be particularly affected by the cold. He stood up straighter and tried his best to ignore the cold drafting through his tattered clothes onto his almond skin. He had heard there were only a few Asha'man, yet as he looked around he could see dozens of men in black coats. All of them were engaged in one activity or another. Rocks exploded, buckets and beams floated, and men fought steel with steel in various parts of his field of view. He turned to Tai as the gateway behind them winked from existence, “Where is this Farm located? And what is all this?” he said, genuinely puzzled.

Karadar walked brazenly into the street in the outer district of Tear. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see people pointing at him and whispering to each other. He was fairly certain he even saw a few running for the guard barracks. Considering all his years as a blacksmith in this city it was ludicrous to think that he wouldn’t be recognized by  someone on the streets, but he really didn’t care at this moment. All that mattered to him was the building a few blocks in front of him. It was once a non-descript building, but now the Dragon’s Tooth mark on the outside made it impossible to mistake. It was a place of madness to the average citizen of Tear. It was the home of male channelers. And with nothing left in this world, Karadar was eager to throw himself to the belly of the beast. He glanced slightly behind as he reached out to open the door, noting that guards had begun to materialize down the street, obviously searching for something. Turning his head back to the door, he opened it and stepped inside.

As he shut the door behind himself, he saw a young man in all black standing off to his right. He wore a silver sword pin on his left collar which sparkled with the glint of something polished for hours and hours. Karadar spoke slowly, his voice hearse from a week of silence, “I’m a man who can channel and I’d like to speak to someone about joining the Asha’man.” The young man appeared taken a bit aback by Karadar’s voice and tattered clothing, but motioned him towards another door. With a nod of thanks, he stepped through it.

Beyond it, he found himself face to face with another man draped in black, wearing a silver sword and a golden dragon pinned to each collar. Karadar didn’t wait for the man to speak instead starting in, “My name is Karadar Kalthorn. I’m a man who can channel. A week ago, Lord Melkar killed my wife and tried to kill me. Instead I called down lightning accidentally killing his bodyguards, and killed him in self defense. I’m here to claim the Dragon’s amnesty and fight for him.”

Thanks for the tips, and the compliments :D

Handle: KerianAmbrai

Character Name: Karadar Kalthorn

Rank: Soldier

Link to Progress Thread: LINK

Best Form of Contact: PM, GMAIL

Remaining Reqs Needed For Advancement: All

Soldier Requirements

Name: Karadar Kalthorn

Learning Saidin: 0, Not Yet Started

Non Saidin Learning: 0, Not Yet Started

Free Roleplay:

• Thread One - 0, Not Yet Started
  
• Thread Two - 0, Not Yet Started
  

I'm Kerian Ambrai, I'll be RPing Karadar. I'm a long time writer, first time Wheel of Time RP'er. You can check out my overly long bio here. Sorry about the length, I tried to cut it down, but I wanted to make sure I hit the high points  :-[

Anyways, look forward to RPing with all of you.