Help me here guys if you can, I've searched the forums with no luck so far.

Where in the books is it explicitly stated that the female/female warder bond between Birgitte and Elayne is having unique side effects from the traditional female/male bonds. I found some quotes about how their emotions mirror each other, but I can't seem to find a quote stating that it's doing it in a  different way than warders normally work.

I remember it was a thing, but I can't find the sources and citations in book and chapter with quotes, and it's driving me crazy. 

I'm having a discussion with another book reader who is super convinced I made that up and won't believe me that it happened without citations and quotes ???.  Feeling a bit gaslit here and want to back that up haha!