On 1/12/2021 at 6:29 AM, wotfan4472 said:

are pretty much a metaphor for how boys and girls learn that there exist differences between them

This sounds pretty much exactly like "gender essentialism."  There's a Wikipedia article that begins to describe the various criticisms of this that various learned people have: 
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_essentialism

 

Great analysis! I've struggled like you, with the relentless-feeling way that Jordan drives home the division between genders throughout the series. 

I've wondered if he had an axe to grind; if he was truly blind to how extreme it felt... 

Your theory about Nyn would have been really really interesting! Imagine the way things would have cracked open if it turned out to not be your genitalia that determined which power you could tap into!

The thought that Jordan was intentionally emphasizing the gender battle in Randland to present a critique of the "men are from mars..." attitude that's so strong in our culture is a comforting one.  He clearly wanted to show the gender battle as something that was holding their society back.