WoT parodies

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

here's a couple of my favorites.

 

i'm sure there must be more.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

the uncyclopedia's re-read. only one worth reading.

 

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Wheel_of_Time

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

and ISAM's classic...

 

http://www.ataricommunity.com/forums/showthread.php?t=386600

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

Rand: I really should be going.

 

Lan: Yes, you should. Another lesson?

 

Rand: Sure.

 

Lan: This move is called "Ending the Book." Use it in a climactic battle at the end of the book against a bad guy.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

Fain: The dagger is mine! My precious! Er, I mean, it's mine.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

Perrin: Please stop insulting me.

 

Faile: Okay, Shaggy-hair.

 

Perrin: Stop it.

 

Faile: Stop what, big man?

 

Perrin: Leave me alone.

 

Faile: Why, farmboy?

 

Perrin: I suddenly love you.

 

Faile: Good. Now wear this collar. I now own you.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

Go Light!

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

“Aragorn? Who's Aragorn? Never heard of him! ... now if you don't mind I'm going to reclaim the throne of my ancestors.”

~ al'Lan Mandragoran

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

"The Wheel of Time series expands novel by novel, and centuries come and pass, leaving behind coherent plots that become legend. Legend fades to myth, and even myth is long forgotten when Elayne takes her seventh bath in one novel. In one Age, called Anno Domani by some, an Age yet to come, and Age long past, a wind rose in the literary wilderness, spinning tumbleweed across an empty dirt-packed road. The wind was not the beginning. There are neither beginnings, endings nor plot resolutions to the turning of the Wheel of Time. But it was another beginning."

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

not entirely PG13 in the uncyclopedia, so you're all on your honor to skip the naughty words.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

“Listen, Faile... If I marry you, will you go away?”

~ Perrin Aybara

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

a brief google for wheel of time parody provides many... many... many more...

 

but i'll give it a rest for now.

[Guest PiotrekS]

BLASPHEMYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

 

Funny as hell though.

 

Go Light!

[Smiley73]

Moiraine: DO NOT go out into Shadar Logoth, or touch anything!

 

Mat: Let's go out into Shadar Logoth and touch things!

 

GO LIGHT!

[Niniel]

I hadn´t read the first before. When I read the Isam version the first time I think I laughed so loud that the whole house could hear me.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

wish they hadn't stopped. ISAMs very very funny.

 

if noone else posts some of the others i'll check em out later, but something about this series really got people.... satirical.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

i "Go Light!" in RL a lot, but nobody gets it. it makes me laugh anyway.

[Niniel]

lol

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

yes, out loud, and that's even more confusing for the humans.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

Wheel of Time Lightbulb Jokes

 

 

 

How many Tinkers does it take to change a light bulb?

They don't. Tinkers wait for the sun to rise.

 

How many Aiel does it take to change a light bulb?

Aiel don't know how to change light bulbs.

 

How many Forsaken does it take to change a light bulb?

None, Forsakens like it in the dark.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

How many Aes Sedai does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one, but she makes 10 other people think they want to do it

for her.

 

How many Two Rivers folks does it take to change a lightbulb?

About 20. Everyone on the Villiage Council will insist that he

should take part of the responsibility, so it will take them a

long time to find the right person to do it. Meanwhile, the

Women's Council will be debating which brand of lightbulb they

should install, comparing unit prices and MTBF ratings. The

plans of the two groups will ultimately conflict, leading to

much use of names like "stubborn" and "woolhead".

 

How many Whitecloaks does it take to change a lightbulb?

Four. One to change it, and three to hunt down the darkfriend

who let it burn out.

 

How many ta'averen does it take to change a lightbulb?

One; s/he holds the bulb aloft and the world turns about him/her.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

How many Ogier does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one, but it'll take them six months to decide who

should leave the stedding to go purchase it.

 

How many Aiel does it take to change a light bulb?

There's more _ji_ in finding ones way in the the dark.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

So, how many ajah *does* it take to screw in a light bulb?

Blue: Three; one to change the bulb and one to confuse the issue.

Brown: Three; one to look up the previous references, one to compile

an index, and one to record how it gets done... by another ajah.

Green: One, plus a warder to screw with.

Grey: "Well, how many do you think it should take?"

Red: "That's not funny, burn you!"

White: [Pauses, goes to change a light bulb, returns.] "One."

Yellow: Three; one to change the bulb, one to learn how it died,

and one to try heal the dead one *anyway*.

Black: Two; one to change the bulb, and the other to secretly

change it back.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

How many Black Ajah does it take to change a light bulb?

a) It doesn't matter, you're still going to find yourself in the Dark.

b) Three. One to do it, one to be a witness, one to kill the witness

(was originally people from NJ)

c) Fourteen. One to do it, thirteen to get thirteen Fades and

change it back to the Dark.

 

How many Yellow Ajah does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You can't Heal the dead.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

How many White Ajah does it take to change a light bulb?

"But how can you be sure the bulb is dead in the first place,

when we only have the evidence of our senses for this?"

 

 

 

How many Brown Ajah does it take to change a light bulb?

Lots; to study an obvious artifact from the Age of Legends.

 

How many Green Ajah does it take to change a light bulb?

One: to get the warders to do it.

 

How many Grey Ajah does it take to change a light bulb?

about 10: so they can dicuss the effects of the absense of light in

such dark times.

 

How many Red Ajah does it take to change a light bulb?

Two; one to change it; and one curse men for not making them last

longer.