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DRAGONMOUNT

A WHEEL OF TIME COMMUNITY
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Christine

No one said love...

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’Bloodycurses! What the hell is wrong with my back? And why am I so hungry? And thirsty… my throat is so dry. Oh my god. Where is Shawn? What happened to him? Where am I? What is going on? Ohh… my back!’ Deneira tried to move, and she slowly pushed herself up. She was starving, and her throat was so dry. A woman rushed to her, and she saw many other women in the room and they were all talking in hushed tones. “Where-“ Deneira could hardly whisper out, and she was handed a glass of water. Sipping at it, she swallowed slowly, almost choking on it. She was so tired, and her head hurt so bad… Light, what was going on?

 

â€You are in the infirmary. Guards found you at the gates, bleeding out. You are lucky you got here so fast. The young man that had you passed out from the blood, and if he hadn’t rushed you here, you might be dead.†What?! Where was Shawn? She sat up, looking around for him, and saw him beside her. He looked so pale and was asleep… she hoped. A sob caught in her throat. “Is he…†The Aes Sedai answered her silent question. â€He is only asleep, and should be rising soon.†Deneira smiled, tears rolling down her face. Thank the light!

 

She pushed away the woman who was trying to get her to sit back down, and fell out of the bed. Shawn was only a few feet away, and she could feel the silence in the room. She knew that she was only in her underware and the bandages they had wrapped around her back that happened to cover her bosom, and that she was creating a scandal, but she had to see him. She would also have to ask who disrobed her and where her dress was. She somehow crawled to him, and the woman let her. Rising up on her knees, she leaned against the bed as she took Shawn’s hand.

 

“Please, Shawn. Please wake up. I’m so sorry, please wake up.†She held onto his hand, crying softly. Light, he could have died because of her! What had happened, she couldn’t remember. Just that she had felt a pain in her back. She squeezed his hand. Light, she hadn’t even told him how she felt. She hadn’t said she liked him, and they hadn’t been together in bed, and… light, she wouldn’t be able to live with herself if he wasn’t ok. “Shawn, please, I love you, please wake up.†He layed there, but she felt a squeeze on her hand. She brushed away the tears.

 

She felt a hand on her shoulder and flinched away from the Aes Sedai. â€I think you need to get back in bed,†the woman said, and Deneira shook her head. “No, he almost died because of me, and I won’t leave him till he wakes up.†The woman shook her head no. â€You almost died. The reason he is still asleep is because so many of us had to work on you. You lost a lot of blood, while he is simply sleeping off the Healing. Get back into that bed, because you are the one at risk.â€

 

Deneira looked at Shawn again, and kissed his hand softly. “I love you,†she whispered again. She felt woozy and felt about to fall over when she felt people around her, picking her up. She was placed into bed again, and turned her face to look at him. He was still so pale… was the woman certain he was only sleeping? Well… they couldn’t lie. And they had said that he was ok… She closed her eyes again, and realisation struck her. She had said she loved him twice. Did she love him? Well, if love was caring about someone more than yourself, and wanting to do anything to make them happy then she was in love. Light, why was it so confusing? What if he didnt love her? Oh light... Tears ran down her cheeks, and she fell asleep again.

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â€You almost died. The reason he is still asleep is because so many of us had to work on you. You lost a lot of blood, while he is simply sleeping off the Healing. Get back into that bed, because you are the one at risk.â€

 

Who was that? It was a strange voice, one he'd never heard before. Shawn was slowly beginning to wake from a sleep that had seemed too deep to be entirely healthy. What had woken him was a hunger the likes of which he'd never experienced before. Even for the three days after he was beaten by the whitecloaks and left to die before the Tinkers found him he still hadn't been this hungry.

 

Then he heard a voice he did recognize, a voice that made him glad to be awake. A voice that brought with it an intense relief as he realized he'd succeeded, she was safe. "I love you."

 

Unfortunately, his throat was so dry he couldn't respond. She loved him? She honestly loved him? Well, it must be true, especially since she thought he couldn't hear her. He struggled, and was able to turn onto his side just in time to see her collapse and be carried to a nearby bed.

 

*******************************************

The Aes Sedai filled him in on what had transpired since last night. Some fellow Guards had carried them both to the infirmary from the gate and the Sisters had taken over from there.

 

It seemed that aside from the knife in his shoulder he'd had no other serious injuries. The shoulder wound had punctured a major artery and he'd lost a lot of blood when they took it out but he'd been Healed without much difficulty. Dene on the other hand had been in much worse shape. The Sisters told him the knife wound she'd recieved would have killed her if he hadn't gotten her there when he did.

 

Shawn spent the next few hours sitting in a chair by Dene's bed reading a book. Eventually she started to stir. Shawn reached over to touch her shoulder and whispered in her ear, "I love you too." Now, why did he say that? It was true yes, but he hadn't meant to say it yet. He had spent the time while she rested thinking of how he felt and what he would say. He'd figured out easily enough how he felt but he hadn't known what he would say until he actually opened his mouth. What had she done to him? He never spoke before carefully considering his words.

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"I love you too..." she heard as she suddenly felt warm again. A soft hand was on her shoulder, and she opened her eyes to see Shawn's smiling face. "You're alive? What did you say?" He looked about to laugh and she smiled, closing her eyes softly. "I love you too," he said as he repeated it. "And very much alive." Laughing, she feebly reached a hand up to him and rested it on the back of his neck as she half pulled him down to her and kissed his lips softly. "Good," she whispered as he pulled away slightly. "Because I do love you." His eyes sparkled and shined, just for her, and she laughed softly as she glanced at his lap where a book was. "Get bored watching me?" she asked, and he shook his head no, sheepishly looking at the book.

 

His hand slipped into hers and she kissed it before slowly moving over in the bed, pushing herself to the wall, leaving a space on the bed beside her. "Please Shawn, please hold me," she whispered, her eyes silently pleeding. It took him one moment to kick off his shoes, unbotton his weapon, and slip into the bed beside her. His arms went around her as he helped pull her to him, and she rested her head on his chest. Closing her eyes, she sighed contently, her one hand slipping back into his as they layed pressed against one another. "I love you Shawn..." she whispered as she slipped back into dreamland.

 

 

OOC: didnt know where to go from there...

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Shawn was amazed how good it felt just to hold Dene in his arms as she slept. As they cuddled up together their bodies fit so well it was as if they were built to go together, almost like a two-piece blacksmith puzzle. About an hour or so after she fell asleep one of the Sisters came by. It seemed she didn't much care for the position they were in, if the glare she shot his way was any indication. He just glared back for a moment, but then nodded his head. She took this as acceptance of her unspoken command and let them have their privacy.

 

A few moments later Shawn woke Dene as gently as he could and asked if she was ready to go. He knew she was healed and rested so when she hesitated he explained about the Sister and why he thought they should move elsewhere, perhaps back to their room.

 

She agreed so he slid out of the bed and respectfully turned his head to afford her some privacy while she found her clothes. He could hear her snickering at him but under the circumstances he felt she deserved the extra respect. Then the snickering stopped and he heard a rustling noise. Turning he discovered that the noise was Dene's body as she slid from the bed on to the floor. It seemed she'd found strength enough to finish dressing but only that and had collapsed right after. She had in fact not quite finished as she had left several buttons un her dress unfastened.

 

Shawn smiled as he gazed down at her. In all the time he'd known Dene she'd never looked quite so vulnerable and innocent. It was very cute. After fastening the rest of her buttons for her he lifted her into his arms, amazed at how light she seemed. On the way out he thanked the Sisters who had performed their Healings and told them he'd watch over the rest of her recovery.

 

Carrying Dene across the Yards to their room Shawn earned many an interesting glance. Some few wore knowing looks, though they truly knew nothing. Most though seemed to have heard about the incedent and offered encouraging words or opened doors for them. Eventually he made it up to their room and laid Dene out on the bed. He propped a few pillows up behind her to make her comfortable and then drew the blankets up around her to keep her warm.

 

Judging by the extent of her fatigue he gauged he had some time before she awoke. By the time she did he was back in the room with plenty of water and a healthy portion of food, just what she needed to recover from her Healing.

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She felt a warm body pressed against hers... the smooth curve of his front as they molded around her back. The way his arms slipped over her stomach to settle just under her breasts and the way his legs just seemed to suck hers to them was almost too much as she opened up her eyes and let out a sigh. He was gently moving her to wakeup, and slowly Deneira peeked out from her veil of sleep. He kissed her cheek and explained the need to return to their room... well, if Shawn thought they needed to go, then they needed to go, and she was fine with that. The more alone time with him, the better, and with all these women trying to take care of her, she thought she would scream. Only Shawn was allowed to take care of her.

 

He left the bed to let her dress and she laughed under hre breath. He had seen her naked many times... perhaps he didnt want to see the scars she knew were there... was there a scar on her face too that he didnt want to look at? Was that why he was turned around? She didnt know, she hadnt looked in a mirror, and her whole body hurt, not just one area. She still got dressed but ended up falling down in a mess. Ready to cry at her inability to do a simple thing, Shawn looked down and smiled at her. He fixed the dress she had pulled on and picked her up like a ragdoll. Somehow, her head just seemed to slip straigh to his shoulder and she burried her face in his chest, ready to be with just him.

 

Finally, when they got to their room, he laid her on one of the beds. He situated the pillows to fit perfectly behind her, then covered her in blankets. Those eyes.. the way they stared down at her... the smile on his face... the care and worry in the contours of his brow... just how he stared down at her and seemed ready to just kiss her at any moment... Light, he had to love her. Although determind to stay awake, Deneira quickly fell back asleep, and was once again dreaming...

 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

 

"Beautiful, if you sleep much longer, then I think that our son might start fussing!" Opening her eyes, Deneira looked around. What was she doing? Where was she? Her body sat up, and she realised she had no control. Who were these arms around her? And that voice! It was Shawn... "Well, perhaps if you got up to change his cloth, then he wouldnt fuss," she said, laughing as she felt a kiss on her stomach. Shawn kissed her lightly and she saw a very large stomach where her flat one should be. "And what of when our next one is born? Will you make me care for both?" he asked, and Deneira laughed. "Our next child will be loved just as well as this one, dear husband." HUSBAND! KIDS! Deneira felt about ready to freak out. What was going on? Where was she? Her body bent down and kissed Shawns lips softly, and Deneira couldnt help but throw everything into that kiss. She hadnt kissed Shawn since the night they had almost died, and never like this. It was so... amazing.

 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

 

Did he love her? Did he really love her? Would they get married? Would they have those children? Was there a future between them? He had said he loved her... Perhaps he thought she was dieing when he said it. What if he only said it because she said it. What if they didnt know what love was? And they hadnt even had sex... perhaps that was why she was so unsure of herself with him at times. They hadnt had sex, and she felt like he was missing out on the inner piece of her... well, yes, he was missing a piece of her, but it was as thought he couldnt understand everything... she needed to have sex with him.

 

Opening her eyes again, she could see it was dark outside. Shawn was in the corner by the fireplace, making it warmer, and she sat up slowly, starving. She coughed slightly, and he turned around, rushing to her with a grin on his face. "Help me up for a moment, please." He did so, and she leaned against the wall. "Ok, now turn around." He stood there for a moment, looking about to laugh, and she glared at him. He turned around and she struggled to get all the buttons on her dress undone. When they were finally gone, she stood there in her bindings and underwear. Those she slipped off too, then sat back on the bed.

 

Slipping under the covers, she told him to turn around. He saw the clothes on the floor and then looked at her, shock on his face. "Shawn... will you please join me?"

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When Shawn turned around he couldn't help but notice the pile of clothes Dene had left on the floor by the bed. Dene's voice cut through to him just as he recognized the underwear and bindings laying on top of the dress. "Shawn... will you please join me?"

 

Here it was again, an invitation he had turned down twice before. He had turned her down the first time because she had offered herself to him as nothing more than a commodity to be traded. He had spent the past few months trying to help her to understand that she was worth more than that. The second time it was even harder to turn down. He had done so then not because it wasn't tempting but because the offer was simply too tempting. He wanted more from her than just a one-night stand or a casual relationship based only on physical activity.

 

Now it was different though. Now he knew where her heart lay, and it lay in his hands. If he turned her down again it would crush her. Besides, he didn't want to turn her down again. On the contrary, he wanted this as much as she, if not more. His hesitation lay elsewhere. He had long since come to terms with her past experience. She was different now and her past no longer stood in his way. Unfortunately, his own past did. Truth was he knew what to do but he'd had precious little experience. His experiences with the Tinker girls had all stopped far short of this moment and he'd been much too busy since coming to the Yards to have prepared himself any further for this moment.

 

All these thoughts passed through his head in the time it took to move to the bed and join her under the covers. It seemed his body knew what to do regardless of any nervousness he felt. He just hoped he didn't dissapoint.

*******************************************

The next morning he awoke with Dene's head on his shoulder and her body wrapped around his. They fit together like puzzle pieces, as they had come to realize together several times last night. Now was the test. Would she still feel for him this morning what she professed to feeling last night? For himself, their night together had only confirmed his feelings and even made them deeper. But he was still nervous to hear what she had to say when she woke. Until then he was content to lay there holding her, inhaling the sweet smell of her hair.

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'Mommy, when will daddy be back?' she heard from the lips of her sweet baby girl. "When he finally gets off guard duty, silly," said her young boy. "Now, children, your father will be home soon. He has to pay for the beautiful house somehow, and you know that he loves working," said Deneira, setting the table for dinner. A hot loaf of bread and some steaming hot soup was set on the table as she prepared her children to eat. Eight years now, she had been married to Shawn, and they had had Ren for 7 years, while Alina was only 4. It had been eight very happy years, and never once did Deneira regret their marriage. She heard the door open and turned as she set down a glass of water for Ren, ready to see Shawn. He stood in the doorway, smiling, and Deneira ran to him, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him softly. She could hear Ren laughing behind them and Alina jumped up, yelling, 'Daddy!' as she ran over to hug one of his legs. Laughing, Shawn slipped his belt off of his waist and handed his weapons to Deneira before picking up his baby girl. Deneira rested her head on his shoulder as they smiled, Ren slowly hugging his mother. This was her family... their family...

 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

 

Waking up, she felt lips in her hair and a hand on her back, rubbing gently. Her head was resting in the middle of his chest and she felt how their bodies melted together. Pressing herself closer, she hugged him up tight and held him as close to her as possible before looking up and kissing him softly. He kissed her back, and she knew that she wanted him, and only him. Their night had been warm, passionate, and loving. She wanted him to be with her forever, to always make her happy- she truely loved him more than anything. Their lips seperated and she slowly whispered, "I love you" before kissing him again softly and slipping back down to rest on his chest. "Thank you so much. You have made me truely happy."

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