All your butts are belong to me!

[GrandpaG]

If I ever lose my job I'm moving to Palm Springs to open an escort service for senior women.  I'll get rich just from the legitimate side of the business not counting the "gratuities".

 

 

 

edit: needed my cursor.

 

 

 

 

* wakes up *

* looks down at his ever expanding gut *

* remembers what he sees while shaving *

* shakes his head *

 

No way.

I'd starve to death.

Edited December 31, 2012 by GrandpaG

[reyler]

*crams Gwampy into the roasting pan and slides him into the oven*

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

i didn't have a car before i got my first government job but as soon as i did i could get a loan and a cheap starter... i don't live anywhere near the office but it's well worth the commute.  and... it would definitely be worth it if it got my mom any farther away, though the 200 miles is comfortable enough for now.

 

but it sucks anyway, just trying to come up with viable alternatives to falling to earth.

Edited December 31, 2012 by cindy

[reyler]

I keep hoping I'll stop waking up, that would work out largely to my satisfaction, I think.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

i have gone to sleep every night for nigh on 40 years either hoping or not caring... and yet morning comes.  

 

and then i have coffee, lots of it, and it's better, and sleep is the best...

 

and then we do it all again.

[reyler]

GLADYS THE CHEERY-TIME STURGEON IS NOT OPEN FOR BUSINESS

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

drink up galdys, for tomorrow we may sleep deeply

[reyler]

Pretty sure nobody really needs yet another Texas Chainsaw Massacre film.

[GrandpaG]

* pops the lid off from the roaster and crawls out of the oven *

* does a quick Gwampy dance to cheer up the crowd *

* watches to see if he was successful *

[reyler]

This is Fiddlesticks, Gwampus; there is no crowd.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

there's three so technically there is a crowd

[reyler]

VARIABLE SITUATION BONUS

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

I'm always here.

 

surprisingly.... sometimes I shut up.

[reyler]

I'd debate "always". Or at least, with relation to "here".

 

Anyway, he's not.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

gee davey, I don't k ow about that...

 

pretty sure he's always watching, especially in the shower.

 

you could debate always for my presence but.... hyperbole or not it's too nearly true to make anyone happy.

[reyler]

I think I prefer to not contemplate Gwampy's shower-time exploits.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

there's a sturdy chair involved, bet on it.

[reyler]

'Pon which sits his keister, which once I described as two giant, pink avocadoes.

[Mrs. Cindy Gill]

will not point out the likely position of the various pedeshkies

[reyler]

In his shoes, most likely.

[mcs0083]

Damn my butt is no longer mine again.

[reyler]

You thought going away for a year or two voided my deed?  

[mcs0083]

I could have sworn there was a termination clause.

[reyler]

Dry your eyes, my dear fisherman, your ass belongs to me

[mcs0083]

I wonder how many people have wondered in here only to have their posteriors spirited away?

Edited August 11, 2013 by mcs0083