It's Just Not my Day! (attn: Nynaeve)

[Raeyn]

A gentle rain was falling on Tar Valon.

 

Of course, the wind itself wasn't so gentle, so the rain was getting rudely dashed against the windows.

 

"Bloody noise," Raeyn grumbled to herself as the glass rattled in its casements.  The Brown Sister sighed and laid the book she had been trying to read on the side table before leaning back in her long chair and lacing her fingers together over her stomach.

 

"Is a woman not permitted a few hours of peace, quiet, and solitude these days?" she muttered, letting her attention focus briefly upon a raindrop being blown across the window.  Shaking her head, Raeyn levered herself out of the chair, smoothing her dark copper silk gown down as she stood.  Picking up a hand mirror, she patted a few loose strands into place, only just remembering to put the mirror down before heading out the door.

 

The thick walls of the Tower muffled the howling wind, and the bare corridors of the Brown Quarters over the Library always brought Raeyn a sense of calm... and a mental reminder that she should spend more tine in her chambers within the Tower.  "I am a Sitter again, and that does mean I have to deal with the other Ajahs... again... bloody Ajah won't let me retire until I'm three days in the grave."  She shook the thought from her head, took a deep breath, and entered the Library proper.

 

The Library was always a comforting sight for the Brown Sister, and one that spelled 'home' for her better than any other place.  She started to let her mind relax and organize her thoughts, when suddenly someone tapped her on the arm.

 

"Yes?" Raeyn said icily as she turned around to see who had interrupted her thoughts.

 

 

[Nynaeve]

Nynaeve sat in the library, hands rested on the table. She spent all day going through books. Old ones. New ones. Ones she couldn't put an age to. She could probably categorize them all by amount of dust each cultivated, but she still wasn't any closer to what she sought. She did not care to share her interest with anyone else, but it neared the moment when she wouldn't have a choice. Unless of course she was seriously entertaining the idea of spending the rest of her life in the library. Tempting, yet at the same time... not.

 

Spotting a Brown not too far away, Nynaeve made her way to her quickly and tapped her shoulder. The Sedai spun around to reveal Raeyn's face. Nynaeve froze. Of all browns, it just had to be her? Nynaeve frowned, but accepted it sullenly. There wasn't anyone around, and if there was one Brown who knew the library as the palm of her hand, that was Raeyn. "I am sorry to disturb you, sister, I was wondering if perhaps you could assist me with a search of certain information. I realize you are not a librarian, but it seems none is around at the moment. I would appreciate it greatly."

 

Raeyn didn't quite answer. Nor even made an expression. She just stared at her, revealing nothing. Nynaeve took it as a sign to go on and expand on what exactly she was looking for. "I've been searching for information about memory. Or rather, lack of. I'd like to learn more about weaves that might affect long and short term memory. It's a research I've been working on. I believe that among other things, it could help trauma patients forget the subject of their fear."

 

Nynaeve coughed. "Mostly I believe it would be a good way to ease pain. Make things a bit more bearable. And I was wondering if any book here might contain information in the matter. I have been searching, but my knowledge of the library's organization is rather... limited."

 

 

 

Nyn

Yellow

[Raeyn]

 

Raeyn did her best not to glare at the Yellow, bloody annoying as their lot were.  And why should she want to know anything about memory?!  Seemed more a thing for a White Sister than a Yellow, but then, Yellows were notorious for being convinced they could heal <i>anything</i> with the One Power...

 

The muffled thunder, dimly heard within the Library, quite suited Raeyn's mood as she attempted to moderate her tone to some semblance of politeness, "Memory... that would be in the Eighth Depository with the other philosophies and healing books."  Her voice sharpened as she spoke; the bloody chit should've known where the few healing books were, at least!  "If you would follow me, please?" 

 

The Brown Sister managed to refrain from stomping, but only just as she led the Yellow Sister through the winding maze of books.  Of course, she managed to spot both the Librarians helping other visitors as she wended deeper in, <i>"Just my bloody lucky day, this is,"</i> she grumped to herself, dodging around a cart awaiting someone to put its contents back on the shelves, <i>"But hopefully I can point her at the right thing and get back to.. oh blood and bloody ashes, what <b>WAS</b> I going to do down here?!"</i>

 

In shorter time than one would think, the two Sisters had quick-stepped into the bowels of the Library.  Raeyn stalked to a set of shelves and tapped them, "This is probably what you would be looking for, then?"  She waited for the other Sister to walk over slowly to join her, and watched as the Yellow started peering at the titles.  "This <i>is</i> what you were wanting then, Nynaeve?"  The other Sister nodded absently, and Raeyn smiled malevolently at her back.  "If that will be all..."  she trailed off, turned around, and started walking away.

 

((ooc - feel free to call her back or something :D))

[Nynaeve]

"This is what you were wanting then, Nynaeve?" Nynaeve nodded slowly. Though she could have sworn she went through that section and came out with nothing. "If that will be all..."  Raeyn turned around and started to walk away. "Wait! I would really appreciate another set of eyes, if that's okay. Unless of course you have urgent errands to attend to?". Raeyn turned, but seemed to be avoiding her eyes. Nynaeve took that as a no.

 

"Marvelous! Oh, thank you so much, sister. I am confident that with your help I will find what I'm seeking. It started to seem like an impossible search before I saw you passing by. It is really fortunate that you did." Nynaeve gave the woman a friendly smile, hoping to motivate her to help. Although if she was displeased with joining, which Nynaeve could not determine, she'd be eager to help her as well, if only to get away form her as soon as possible.

 

Nynaeve grabbed a pile of books and put them on a table near by. "Lets hit the books then", Nynaeve said, only to receive a flat stare from Raeyn. Nynaeve had to repress a giggle. It's been a while since she drew amusement out of antagonizing a fellow Sedai and Raeyn seemed to deliver. The cutesy method was one of Nynaeve's favorite techniques of driving stuffy women crazy. And it never did fail. Still, Nynaeve appreciated Raeyn's assistance. Browns always seemed to have a better eye for details.

 

Nynaeve flipped through the pages that seemed to be too familiar for her taste. She focused on the words, pausing a few times but never finding the weaves she was searching for. She sighed, and closed the book with a loud thud. "This seems hopeless", she muttered.

 

 

 

Nyn

Pesky Yellow

[Raeyn]

Raeyn had to refrain from glaring hard enough to bore a hole through the bloody flipskirt Yellow Sister.  <i>"Does the bloody giggle box on the trollop come with an off button?!</i>" the Brown Sister grumbled mentally as she slowly proceeded towards the table where Nynaeve had started spreading out books.

 

<i>"Still, one has to wonder if she's actually just that annoying and stupid, or if she's actually being very clever... I think I'll stick to the latter opinion for the moment.</i>" she mused as she sat down and look one of the volumes the other Sister had laid out.

 

Abruptly, Nyneave shut a book with a loud thud, startling Raeyn from what she was reading over, "This seems hopeless," the Yellow Sister complained, frowning at the volumes on the table.

 

Raeyn surpressed a sigh and a smirk - even as much knowledge as books had, one couldn't find <i>everything</i> in them.  She looked at the despondent woman before her, "This paricular volume seems to contain some interesting theory on how the mind works," she said softly, pushing the book across the table, "Have you put any thought onto adapting existing healing weaves to do the job?  It's not my forte, but I <i>guess</i> I can help."

 

After all, Raeyn <i>is</i> a Brown, and what Brown could resist studying something a little more?!

[Nynaeve]

Nynaeve grabbed the book Raeyn offered and nodded. "I just need the basis to start from...". Nynaeve opened the book and started reading, in between peering at Raeyn. She came across various healing weaves, but none that seemed to coincide with what she was looking for. A few of them, however, seemed to touch the subject of pregnancy and the mental and emotional state in which such a patient finds herself. Nynaeve couldn't help but linger on the chapter. It triggered memories and Donoven's birth started to replay in her head. The first time she saw his little hands with his tiny fingers, wrapped around hers. Oh, but he was beautiful. Perfect in any way possible, as was his conception, regardless of how unintentional the event was. He was her little miracle. That was never questioned.

 

They reached the decision together. Damian and her. None was complete about it, nor overjoyed. But they knew long before what had to be done. Every action has a consequence. One that had to be dealt with. And so it was. Donoven was given to a maid in the Tower to raise, and she was compensated generously to provide the service. She was to act as his birth mother and she was not to reveal the truth to him, or anyone, for that matter. Nynaeve couldn't risk it, otherwise everything was for naught.

 

But it was a burden. Guilt seemed to pile over the years. It was so stressful that sometimes it felt as if nothing could prevent it all from falling apart. The secret was safely kept, but at what cost? Piece by piece, Nynaeve's heart started to deteriorate. She had so much love accumulated in her. So many embraces that she could never give, so many lullabies unsung, scolding that never formed into speech. He was her little boy. Her treasure. Her light. But she sentenced herself to wander in the dark for the rest of her life.

 

Snapping back from her thoughts, Nynaeve realized that tears were sliding down her cheeks. Raeyn was staring at her, a tinge of surprise in her expression, noticed by a slight raise of her eyebrows. "I need to forget", Nynaeve whispered, half to herself, closing her eyes forcefully. "Before I lose myself."

 

 

 

 

Nyn

Apparently having a nervous breakdown :P

[Raeyn]

 

Raeyn's eyes widened as tears started to pour from the other Sister's face, <b>“I need to forget,”</b> the other woman whispered miserably as she squeezed her eyes shut, <b>”Before I lose myself.”</b>

 

Looking around quickly, she leaned over and hissed, “Get ahold of yourself, woman!”  Concern warred with disgust of this public display of emotion, and she let herself go so far as to reach over and place her hand on the Yellow's arm.  Squeezing gently, she held the other woman's red-rimmed gaze and continued on in a gentler tone, “I... don't know what you're looking to forget, and I'm not sure that you'll find answers in these books...”  The Brown Sister paused to scan the area again; after verifying they were still alone, she continued, “Have you considered asking amongst your Sisters in your Ajah?  Surely there has been one that has researched matters of... that sort.”

 

Her lips curled into a brief sneer; everyone had their share of problems in life... but what could make this woman want to find a way to alter her own mind?