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DRAGONMOUNT

A WHEEL OF TIME COMMUNITY
Mashiara Sedai

Personal decision... read at your own risk! Haha

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I'm glad things are going so well!

Discoloration and swelling is to be expected - it will go away and then you'll look gorgeous!

 

I understand how you feel, though. I had to have a piece of flesh removed from my pinkie on my left hand, where a tiny piece of glass had been left behind after a cat induced / beer glass accident. The piece of glass started to migrate, and with my blood which doesn't clot properly, the doctor decided to excise it right there and then before it got into a vein. There was a hole in my pinkie! I fainted the first time I saw it. Literally. Feinted. On the bathroom floor. Thereafter I cleaned it whilst looking the other way. I was so upset! But now you can hardly see a scar there.

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Hugs, just be carefull, and let yourself heal.

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1 hour ago, Elgee said:

I'm glad things are going so well!

Discoloration and swelling is to be expected - it will go away and then you'll look gorgeous!

 

I understand how you feel, though. I had to have a piece of flesh removed from my pinkie on my left hand, where a tiny piece of glass had been left behind after a cat induced / beer glass accident. The piece of glass started to migrate, and with my blood which doesn't clot properly, the doctor decided to excise it right there and then before it got into a vein. There was a hole in my pinkie! I fainted the first time I saw it. Literally. Feinted. On the bathroom floor. Thereafter I cleaned it whilst looking the other way. I was so upset! But now you can hardly see a scar there.

 

That sounds awful, Mother!  I’m

sure I would have fainted too if I saw a hole in my pinky.  Blugh.  When I looked at my wounds I was laying in bed just in case I did get woozy.  It wasn’t as bad as I’d feared though.  And I didn’t look long.  Lol!

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3 hours ago, Mashiara Sedai said:

When I looked at my wounds I was laying in bed just in case I did get woozy.  It wasn’t as bad as I’d feared though.  And I didn’t look long.  Lol!

 

Very wise! LoL

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Don't tell the Gaidin lest they decide it's a good idea, but battle scars are sexy. *waggles eyebrows*

 

In all seriousness, it takes a lot to look at a wound and find anything pretty in it. This is a big body change, and even though you wanted it, its going to be a while before you 'like' it. *hugs* Either way, it sounds like you are doing great! More to the points, you are doing things more at your own pace without shying away from it too much for it to interfere with the more emotional part of your healing. You are still beautiful, and it's just going to take a little while before you feel it too. 

 

💖

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Thanks for thinking of me, @LilyElizabeth!  There's just so much going on right now I'm a tad overwhelmed.

 

As far as my recovery goes, I've hit a road stop.  I had some separation in the stitches (much worse on the right breast than the left) and it set my recovery back another three weeks.  I'm seeing my doctor weekly, which is lovely because I'm the type to freak out.  She's been amazingly compassionate, understanding, and calming.  So I'm not overly worried, I'm just frustrated that it's taking so long to heal. 

 

I've been unable to look at my wounds because it grosses me out so much, so my husband has taken over changing my bandages every day.  After I shower, he has to clean them with hydrogen peroxide, add a medicated ointment of some sort, then add on a special medicated gauze (called xeroform), then put on the regular, absorbent gauze.  It's a lot, but he does it lovingly and without complaint.  I'm so lucky I've got such a wonderful spouse!

 

A lot of my swelling has gone down, but my doctor let me know it'll take roughly six months for them to stabilize at the size they'll be from now on.  So far, I think they're still too large, but we'll see how much more they can shrink.  If not, I've already talked to her about possible liposuction to get the results I want.

 

So, it's been rather stressful with all this going on and also the forced isolation and trying to instruct 10-year-olds with online learning.

 

Are all you hanging in any better than me?

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I have such a great respect for teachers now. I already did, but the flexibility you have had to have to suddenly switch gears - wow! 

 

I am working from home 4 days a week and going into the office on Mondays only. They want a small presence in the office every day and my day is Monday. We still won't be seeing clients. Everything is conducted telephonically now. I'm just grateful that my industry (behavioral health) is considered essential and I have a job. 

 

I've been moving so yesterday was my first day to actually stay home. (I wasn't feeling well Friday so I opted to stay home yesterday to be safe. I'm fine now.) 

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My sister is a teacher too and she teaches online now too. She says it’s even harder to make kids to concentrate online. 🙂

*hugs*

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I'm really sorry about your set-back, Mashi 😞

It looks like your lovely husband has things well in hand, though!

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Okay *deep breath*

 

So, I went into this procedure with an expectation of getting a body image I liked.  As I said before, the doctor said she'd get my breasts as small as safely possible.  That is something I can respect.  However, I have been an unquenchable ball of rage for the past four weeks.  At one of my appointments, my doctor mentioned how I felt my breasts were still too big.  She said she could have taken them smaller but she decided not to because she wanted them to be proportional to my body.


What?

 

I'd made it clear I wanted SMALL breasts.  Very, very clear.

 

Unfortunately, that was one appointment my husband wasn't able to attend with me, so I was left to feel this overwhelming sense of fury all on my own.  Now, I'm very soft spoken in person, so I didn't blow up at my doctor for misleading me.  Rather, I've contained it inside my body for four weeks.  I cry every few days because my rage is limitless.

 

So, yesterday at my appointment I finally worked up the correct way to address this.  I knew yelling at the doctor and releasing my anger would not be an appropriate tactic--which was why it took me several weeks to analyse my emotions and express them calmly.  So, I asked what options there were to get my breasts smaller because I was still very unsatisfied with the size.  I admitted that I'm crying most days when I look and see how big they are.  I mean, I have been going through daily torment with the surgery alone, and to not have satisfying results on top of it?  Double frustration.  

 

And of course she was understanding and compassionate.  She said she would fix it.  I know she's an expert and I'm sure she's dealt with a lot of women who are looking for an aesthetically pleasing body.  I'm not one of those women.  I want my body to be comfortable and I am still so UNCOMFORTABLE.  Ugh....  Anyway, she said she'll fix it.  We'll have to wait 4-5 months, but she'll fix it.  She reaffirmed there would not be any additional costs, besides the biopsy of any tissue removed.  That's acceptable.  I'm still terribly pissed, but at least I have her confirmation we can still get this done and it won't be more of a financial burden.

 

*deep breath again*

 

I guess I'm just tired of having people second guess my personal choices.  I knew what I wanted and I wasn't listened to.  But she'll fix it, and I won't have to pay for another round of surgery, so I'll get the results I wanted, just not in a timely manner.

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So frustrating when stuff like that happen, you have every reason to be mad. Good she will do it at no cost, but you still have to endure another operation so really its only fair since she made the mess anyway.

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Just a quick update!  My healing is going pretty well, still.  My left breast is almost completely sealed up--there's maybe a half inch opening.  The right breast has a slightly larger opening.  It's probably about two inches still.  The wounds aren't gaping.  It's more like when you have a cut on your finger and there's a bit of discharge still.  I don't know all the technical names for what it is, but it's still leaky.  I wanted to go swimming since it's so hot out now, but I can't yet because the wounds aren't sealed.

 

Oh on a good note I'm finally healed up enough that I can go without my bra a bit!  Usually after I shower I lay in bed without a bra for an hour or so!  It's lovely!   

 

I have another appointment with my doctor next Wednesday, so we'll see how it goes this time.

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That does sound like good progress! 😄 Braless in bed is a great feeling!

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Hugs happy to hear there is progress.

Keep taking care of yourself and dont stress to much.

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