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Origin/Lore for a book I would love to write


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Hi All,

very nervous to share this, but everyone has been great on DM so far, so I am going to be brave!

This is a story within a story!

(It is the Lore/origin around how the world of my book came to be and gives hints as to the landscape, personality and traditions that would also exist) I would be interested to know if anyone likes it :)




(Story Told at every Choosing of the Daughter)

In the times of the great past, Tevya, God of Man, fell in Love with Manai, Goddess of the Stars. One night Tevya asked the Goddess to marry him and rule as Queen by his side. Manai said that she would only leave the sky for the ground if he could make her a perfect world. So Tevya made Oravka, mapped using the stars in her likeness. He made the Summer Lands of Caroli, but Manai said that heat must know cold, so she could not come. He made her the winter lands of Spita - but she said the branches should know leaves, so she could not come. He made her the Spring Lands of Alkkai but Manai said that life should know death, so she could not come. Finally he made the autumn lands of Denebuh, and asked her again.

Manai told Tevya that to create balance, one must accept that when one thing is born, so too is it's opposite. For every light, there is a shadow. For every young rabbit, a fox lies in wait to hunt. For every man that is born good, a man is born evil. The only thing that can bring balance in any world is time. 

Unwilling to yield, Tevya knelt before the brother gods of time. The God of Yesterday, the God of Today, and the God of Tomorrow. Tevya asked them to watch over the lands of Oravka until it was perfect, in turn Tevya would give them the most beautiful and accomplished daughter of their choosing from each land, to rule in their name.

Nerru, the God of Yesterday was given to the Summer-lands of Caroli to remind them of their past. Inru, The God of Today was given to the spring lands of Alkkai to teach them the importance of the present, and Nalai, the God of Tomorrow was given to the autumn lands of Denebuh to help them see ahead.

The Brother Gods first travelled to Alkkai, where they built the Kingdom of Piran and Inru the God of Today chose the daughter of the kindest man and named her Alamana, First Daughter of Spring. Inru taught her of love and friendship, of fertility, nature and animals.

The Gods then travelled to Caroli where they built the Kingdom of Vay and Nerru the god of Yesterday chose the daughter of the Wisest man and named her Erikka, First Daughter of Summer. Nerru taught her of History and of Stories, of the stars and the sky, of customs and of ceremony.

The Gods then travelled to Denebuh where they built the city of Marram where Nalai chose the daughter of the bravest man and named her Nekili, First daughter of autumn. He taught her of time and change, of battles and peace, of danger and of stealth.

Finally the Gods travelled to Spica, the land of winter and built the fortress of Otai. The Gods then gave Tevya a choice. They told him that once their reign began, so would time itself. If Tevya chose to leave Spica, he would be in their lands, and a servant of time like every other man. He would age like a man, and die like a man. If Tevya chose to stay, the gods would also spare the winter people of time, and in turn they would forever guard Otai, from now until the arrival of the Queen when time would be relinquished. Lest he never see Manai again, Tevya agreed. This marked the beginning of time, and the reign of the first spring.

Not forgetting their promise to Manai, in a quest to make his a world of perfect balance, the Gods decreed that each Queen would rule one thousand days, and once complete, a new cycle would begin. At the end of every cycle, we gather here tonight at the centre of all lands in the forests of Angul on the longest day, to balance the scale of seasons– and celebrate the choosing of the daughters.  

May Our Daughters Serve time.

May The Weights be balanced. 

May The Queen come forth.   





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i like the way in which the lore is delivered. the pacing and everything is very nice. ya lose me a bit when it gets to the specifics of who begot who, from where and built what. it's necessary but personally those are things i always tend to gloss over, regret and have to go back and re-read.

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  • 5 weeks later...

Very interesting lore, I really like the use of the seasons. That sets up some interesting possibilities in lore and imagery going forward. Quick question, why were the daughters chosen? Why not a different daughter or a son? Grammar-wise, keep an eye out for sentence fragments. Sometimes when you get into real flowery or artistic language style, it's easy to forget proper grammar.


Overall , good job and I would be interested in more from this world. 

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