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Caldazar al'Aemon

What does your Ajah mean to you?

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This quote alone will resonate with every Ajah, so I need to share if someone else has not.


"It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities."

— Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets



In my journey through the Ajah over many.. many years (nearly 20!) I learned a lot of what I am, what I saw myself as and dove deeper to try and understand where that core was. I will be the first to admit that I resonate with all the Ajah's in some way. I always have. Causes, choices, actions. At the core of them, at the core of me, is Love. I fight battles that aren't always my own out of Love. I seek to find balance and common ground out of Love. And that Love is selfless.


What brings me the most joy in life is making others happy. To help make things better, to fix what is broken; be it a website, a relationship, a hurt soul. It all starts to pile up and after reflecting on what that was for me, Yellow became a no brainer. And it scared me. Choosing Yellow over any other Ajah is scary to me because it means I have to bring down my walls. I have given and given to all the right and the wrong people and have been betrayed very deeply for it. Still I give but have grown cautious of it to a point of having a hard "Don't Care" button. And that button has made me unhappy, unsatisfied. Hurt.


Yellow I feel will both help me heal those walls while also helping me reconnect with what makes me Yellow. I chose being a Therapist over a Teacher, when I first was in school. And while school and I didn't get along, in practice it's usually the role I take naturally. I don't heal the body, it's not my thing. I heal souls. Out of love, it's all I want to do.


And that definitely makes me Yellow.


It's just a process that comes down to each individual, choosing an Ajah, because as much as the site changes from year to year, so do we as individuals. So maybe the challenging question may be as much as 'where do I fit' as much as 'where do I want to grow' too.

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